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DrkJourney -> RE: Things dominant ladies do on this site that make them look bad. (7/19/2009 8:13:50 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Resnic
1- If your not interested in a male that messages you, pending they arent rude or just outright ignored your profile atleast have the common decency to say your not interested. Ive sent so many messages that were short and friendly only to be read and ignored. Yes you may call yourself a dominant but your still just a person and every person should atleast have some basic sets of manners in place. And Ive seen profiles that just say "If I dont respond Im not interested", well thats pretty rude to say. If the person took the time to message you could atleast take 3 seconds to type "Im not interested, good day" and send it. Submissive or dominant, neither are an excuse for not being curtious on some basic level to others.
I always respond. If I'm not interested, I usually reply with I don't think we have the same interests, and wish them good luck on their search, the majority of the time I get back a hateful message, so excuse me of some days I'm a little burned out on here and well sometimes just life in general and delay a return email because I don't want to take the chance on a whiner that day.
2- There is a difference between being a dominant and a bitch. This especially applies to talking to strangers. Yeah I get your a dominant but there is a line between being dominant and just being a crass, belittling cunt for no reason at all other than you can. If thats your schtick then thats fine, but save it for when your actually talking to your sub/slave or till you get to know that person well enough to show them that side.
Only ones worse than that are the ones who are proud self proclaimed bitches and that must make sure every 3rd sentence expresses they are bitches proudly, have pics on their profiles of the word bitch tattoed on them, their paddle that says bitch and underwear that says bitch. Really now, to me atleast a woman who proudly and overtly professes her bitchiness constantly is not attractive. Ive never wanted to be with a woman who enjoys being a negative stereotype of a women, bitch isnt a good word when referring to womens attitudes. Try being a person first and a bitch second.
Hmmm...I've always had the attitude, and have expressed it thousands of times that we are just two people until I put a collar on you, so no, I'm not going to "play" Domme online...and you'll be amazed at how many times I get called a fake, etc. cause I won't fulfill some instant fantasy. What I'm saying here, is those Dommes are around for those submissives, if you are not one of them, kindly take your own advice and say thanks but no thanks and move on.
3- Capping the words "NO MEN NO MEN NO MEN NO MEN" a 100 times in your profile and spouting it constantly frankly is very ill tempered and childish looking. I promise you it wont help anything, infact it actually might antagonize someone into messaging you that otherwise might not have before. The problem is the guys that message those women do so because they dont read their profile, so saying no men 43 times wont help because well, they dont read the profile its written on. People who do that wanting men or not never come across to me as someone I would want to talk to.
What is this even a point of contention with you? Everyone has the right to put whatever they want on their profile. Why are you looking at lesbian profiles any way? Why are these your business?
4- Dominants in clubs/munches or whatnot that send in response information about them. I have messaged several domme's here and gotten a knee jerk email about some munch they are in and where it is and such. Its not much different than getting spam in my email about viagra, if I wanted to know about a munch I would ask about it.
So you are looking for a Domme, and she gives you info on a munch either to meet you there, or to be nice and give you help on where you can find what you seek. Yes sometimes we are not interested, but we honestly want to help...seems like one can't seem to win with you. all you have to say is, thank you, but clubs and munches just aren't my thing. Hell, I've had countless tell me about munches, invites, etc. I just assume they are being nice and trying to be helpful in stating what has worked for them, why else who they send it. Hey, they could've just ignored you, oh but wait, we get blasted for that too. Seems like the bottom line is, we have to answer the way "you" want us to answer or we are fakes, wanna be's, or spammers...goodness
Part 2 of this is also that alot of dommes I run into arent interested even in friendly emails and say if you want to talk come to a munch or chastise you for not getting into munches to meet people, or just flat out ask why your hiding for if you dont want to be in a group. Some people dont like to play pinball machines, watch horror movies, drink cherry coke or work on cars, I do personally but I never felt the need to ask others why they dont also or try to talk them into it.
Again, not interested? move on.
5- Women who want money or some item bought online for them before they even talk to you. Im sorry but your basically just want people to give you shit, you dont care about the person at all or an interest in ever getting to know them, your a gold digger. Ive heard alot of excuses like "Well this is to prove your actually interested and real person and not some flake" thats just a excuse to bilk idiots out of their money and nothing more. I seriously doubt any domme has gotten a donation, talked to a sub, found out they werent interested and then refunded that sub their money because it didnt work out. If they had then they would have been the only ones serious about taking a donation strictly just to see if the other person was serious because they would give it back if things worked or not. And for a real submissive its also pretty damn rude and does nothing to foster interest from our end because were sitting there thinking "So, she would only be willing to talk to me if I pay her to?" thats the same level as phone sex operator, I could never even be able to fake interest in someone I have to pay to be interested in me. Not to mention it also makes you seem like the one who isnt actually serious or real.
Do you realize how many have offered me money? Especially since I have on my profile that I'm now married and only here for the boards and the friends I have made and hope to make more? Even before that I was always approached by people that start off bitching about all the money Dommes, and by the third email was offering me money for either some service or just to give for something....which is really strange since I never spoke of money and I ignored their talk of money and just tried to learn about them to see if we were compatible...but it's all they seemed to want to talk about. So again, like above, these Dommes are here for these people, if you are not one of those people, simply move on. And also, like above, if these people are not bothering you and you simply are seeing this in their profiles...why are you even reading them? They have the right to put what they want in their profiles as you do.
I could really get nit picky about alot more stuff but Ill stay away from that and just go with the major things Ive seen that I think are probablly pretty tangible. Like I said, Im not obsolving men or submissives from having problems also, Im just illustrating some I see from my end of things about others.
I have had major problems on this site as well, but I didn't rant and rave about it. I learned from whatever it was and "moved on"....that's what you do. Other than offending people by lumping, what have you accomplished? Do you think the people that offended you are going to have the great realization and bend to your will?
You are letting things get to you that are easily avoided, and some that clearly have nothing to do with you, you seemed to have come upon them not the other way around. Just read profiles, find the ones that apply to you and email them...if they respond great, maybe this is the person for you, if not, great, then you "know" this isn't the person for you and aren't you glad you found out before you wasted major time with them? I used this method and although it took forever, and I really didn't think it would happen, I found my "one" and you can too, just be patient. stick to the people that apply to "you" and your search, and stop the judging and wanting everything your way, life does not revolve around the fantasy that you have in your head about how someone is supposed to act and respond to you, as you said we are all just people, and you'll be just fine
good luck out there
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