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RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 8:11:04 AM   
daintydimples


Posts: 967
Joined: 7/6/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SoulPiercer

No. But pro subs are really Dommes.

Pro sub: "Give your money and you can whip my ass."
Paying Dom: "Okay."
Pro sub: "Good boy."

Just sayin.



*chuckles


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RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 8:51:58 AM   
brumindubsub


Posts: 22
Joined: 6/13/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

quote:

But how many have been truely honest how many people who have replied to this post have much information or photos up.


and what does THAT have to do with anything?




Some profile have nothing about themselfs in then no photo nothing,most of thses profiles have turned out to be fake,or just people looking to make money.I have learned to be careful as you might spend your night chatting to the same sex as yourself lol....thats what i ment me dear,a good profile will attract the people you seek,a bad one god nos any nut would reply to them...

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 9:48:19 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		a lot of people choose to put minimal info in their profile to try and avoid wanker emails.  A lot of people choose not to put pics in because of their professions.  

This does not make them any less "WEAL".  Just cautious.


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RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 10:06:20 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		Does this mean that a Dominant that buys the flogger to beat the subs arse is also a sub?
Actually this is such a complicate equation because the pro Domme/Dom is still in control of the scene (if she's any good) up to the point of the sub safe wording but wait a minute.......... does that not mean that all Dominants must really be submissive because they are only in control up to the point of the sub telling them to back off?

< Message edited by allthatjaz -- 7/27/2009 10:10:43 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 10:37:10 AM   
brumindubsub


Posts: 22
Joined: 6/13/2009
Status: offline 		Ok greedytop you have a good point on what you say there,i with draw what i said some people might need to keep them selfs hidden maybe shy maybe new this is a fair point and i except what you say.

All that jazz,well if i domme is buying a whip to beat her sub is she buying it because she is enjoying it useing  it on her sub because if she dont enjoy useing it whats the point of buying it,Unless it like a elecrican buying a tool for there trade,this point has no meaning.
I see your in a relisonship,so when you buy stuff its for you and your partner,and id say you go half each or take turns buying stuff for yourselfs to enjoy,im sure you dont buy toys to use on others...

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Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 10:53:38 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: brumindubsub

Ok greedytop you have a good point on what you say there,i with draw what i said some people might need to keep them selfs hidden maybe shy maybe new this is a fair point and i except what you say.

All that jazz,well if i domme is buying a whip to beat her sub is she buying it because she is enjoying it useing  it on her sub because if she dont enjoy useing it whats the point of buying it,Unless it like a elecrican buying a tool for there trade,this point has no meaning.
I see your in a relisonship,so when you buy stuff its for you and your partner,and id say you go half each or take turns buying stuff for yourselfs to enjoy,im sure you dont buy toys to use on others...



When I was a pro Domme I bought many things because I enjoyed using them. Yes, I got my return on the bought item but then I never bought anything or did anything for that matter that I didn't enjoy doing.
When I/We buy stuff it is not necessarily for me and my partner. We keep our own selective toys very much to ourselves but we do play with subs and we do need to buy things specifically for them.
I have to add that when I did this for money I got many clients that would say 'do whatever you want to me Mistress' I also got many that were very specific about their needs and wants but then I still come across many subs (as a none payed Domme) that are very specific about what 'they' want. You don't have to be a pro Domme to find plenty of 'do me subs'. When you first get talking to a submissive they will usually inform you of what they are and are not willing to do. If I go along with their likes does that make me a submissive?


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(in reply to brumindubsub)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 11:03:29 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: brumindubsub

All interesting replies.
But how many have been truely honest how many people who have replied to this post have much information or photos up.
I think some are not being as honest as they like as they might have friends or people they like or want to see who are pro dommes, maybe im wrong.
Some are out for the fast buck no dout about that.
I didnt start this thread about the mioney thing its was about are pro dommes subs.
some one said about a car mecanic whic is true why should a pro domme explain herself she should not,Pay her and recive a sevice like a car being fixed if your not happy dont go again ask for your money back  so this enforces my point a pro domme is a sub to.Nothing wrong with this fact but its not really for me to be dominated by a sub,and to be honesty its not the kinky games for me,its mental im as strong minded man so she has to mentaly strong.
But never the less all very intersting


The only point you have reinforced is your too stubborn to listen to any one else. And the you don't know any pro dommes in real life.  As to the picture in your profile proving your real. Yea ok, sorry but it looks a lot like the kid that was at my nephews party last weekend. Are you sure you didn't snatch it off face book?

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Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 11:16:30 AM   
LadyNTrainer


Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: brumindubsub
I was talking to a pro Domme on here, and do any of you on this site belive like i have now come to belive that domme who ask for tribute or for nice things are in fact subs.


Are doctors really patients?  Are lawyers really defendants? They are being paid for their time and skills, so the same argument should certainly apply.

Is your car mechanic your submissive?  You're paying for a professional service that you want done to your specifications, but they're also exercising their professional judgment as to what specifically needs doing.  They're definitely in charge of the operation, even though the client is paying for results.  Let's face it; if you were qualified to dictate to them exactly what needed to be done to your engine to make it purr, you'd probably be doing it yourself and saving a lot of money.  You're not, but they are, and so they do their jobs with professional pride and expertise.  That's why they are the professionals. 

Any kind of transaction or interaction can have a dom/sub dynamic, but it's dangerous to assume that dynamic is going to be the same in all cases.  Much of the time you'll be wrong, and some of the time you'll be genuinely surprised.

Two people walk into a restaurant.  One picks up a menu; the other ignores the menu.  The one who picked up the menu orders for both people. Is this transaction about a submissive who is acting in service to the dominant, or a dominant who is making choices for the submissive?  Or are we looking at a totally vanilla restaurant critic, mystery shopper or food aficionado with a cooperative buddy in tow?  At this point we don't know, and neither does anyone else who isn't sitting at that table.

Here's another example out of my own life.  At a femdom play party with a buffet on the table, I assemble a plate for myself and hand-feed morsels to my attending submissive, or give him food from my plate.  He may or may not get his own plate in addition to being fed off of mine, depending on my whim.  Usually he can if he wants to, since I care more about the practicality of getting him fed than I do about being strict with protocol.  He doesn't often serve me food, as I personally tend view food allocation as more of a dominant action.  He may bring me drinks, but I'm a very physical, active person, and sitting on my ass while others fetch and carry for me just doesn't appeal much to me.  I like to take the extra exercise of going for it myself, and if it's really heavy to carry, so much the better - I can do curls with it while I'm walking.  To an outsider looking at the visible behavior, they might not read "femdom" into this dynamic.  But it's very definitely there.

It's not generally safe to make assumptions about the underlying D/s nature of a transaction if you aren't personally participating or if you don't know the participants very well.  It's even less safe to make the same assumptions about a whole class of transactions occuring between many different people.

< Message edited by LadyNTrainer -- 7/27/2009 11:17:26 AM >

(in reply to brumindubsub)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 12:37:46 PM   
Leonidas


Posts: 2078
Joined: 2/16/2004
Status: offline 		Dude.  They are in the amusement business.  You pay your fee, buy a ticket, and they give you the experience you'd like until your time is up.  No, you're not really her naked groveling bitch in a secluded dungeon where nobody can hear you beg, but hey, if it floats your boat to pretend like you are, you pays your money and you gets your show.

Yes, it's all about you.  You're the paying customer, and you (hopefully) get more or less what you were hoping to get when you plunked down your cash.  That doesn't make her a sub, it just makes her an entertainer.

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Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 12:38:51 PM   
brumindubsub


Posts: 22
Joined: 6/13/2009
Status: offline 		Yes thats me in the photo he he.Any one douts it if you have a web camera i prove it if you need me to a bit childish but funny.
Lady trainer,i take it your a pro domme thats fair enough,but when a man pays you and says do want you want he as brought you paid for you your his. Dress it up anyway you want this is what you are a paid for sevice not a laywer not a doctor a paid for domme.Why so many pro dommes are trying to justify this is surprizeing me.Be proud of your job but to me and im not being stubin on this i just belive any domme that takes money for being domme is a sub,and a sub women is of no use to me.

Allthat jazz
I dont think if i had a partner i would notlike them haveing other play partners at all.Call me old fashioned but if you have a long term partner and you have the need to see other people then your relionship has serious problems,maybe boredom i dont no but be careful,

(in reply to LadyNTrainer)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 12:41:29 PM   
brumindubsub


Posts: 22
Joined: 6/13/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Leonidas

Dude.  They are in the amusement business.  You pay your fee, buy a ticket, and they give you the experience you'd like until your time is up.  No, you're not really her naked groveling bitch in a secluded dungeon where nobody can hear you beg, but hey, if it floats your boat to pretend like you are, you pays your money and you gets your show.

Yes, it's all about you.  You're the paying customer, and you (hopefully) get more or less what you were hoping to get when you plunked down your cash.  That doesn't make her a sub, it just makes her an entertainer.


Very good very funny
They in the amusement buissness i like it mate 10 out of 10 for that post...
I gpo for that a entertainer not sub not domme just a entertainer,like it.

(in reply to Leonidas)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 1:01:38 PM   
DemonKia


Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline 		Abso-freakin'-lutely. Disrespectful attitudes towards professional BDSM providers is a big turn-off for me . . . . .. I have a huge pet peeve about disrespecting anyone working in adult entertainment (porn, stripping, prostitution, sensual massage, pro-kink, whatever) just on the basis of that employment . . . . .

& I don't think I'm the only one who thinks your desirability went up with this post, A. . . . .

*flutters eyelashes*

quote:

ORIGINAL: Apocalypso

I certainly would not presume to speak for the dommes on here.  But if I was a non pro domme, I suspect I'd think your attitude to pro dommes would rule you out of consideration for me.  That would be my position if you were a female submissive.  Still, possibly that's just me and this thread has actually heavily increased your desirability.


< Message edited by DemonKia -- 7/27/2009 1:02:35 PM >

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RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 3:40:41 PM   
MsFlutter


Posts: 1305
Joined: 11/12/2008
From: East Coast
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lostkitten3

I tried it for a while, got bored and quit. The guys are just gross. They can't pay me enough to forget what they look like, and they act all needy and pathetic and manipulative. Ew.


okay - that was some interesting insight (I always wondered about such things LOL) 

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RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 4:20:15 PM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: brumindubsub



Allthat jazz
I dont think if i had a partner i would notlike them haveing other play partners at all.Call me old fashioned but if you have a long term partner and you have the need to see other people then your relionship has serious problems,maybe boredom i dont no but be careful,



brumindubsub you have read into this the way that you want to read it with your own prejudices. You have decided that playing with other people is wrong for you and so must be a serious problem within any relationship that do so.
We play with other people but always together and couples that play together happily will stay together happily.
You have had numerous good replies that debate your theory and yet you still come back with the same old same old. You don't listen, learn or accept that perhaps your wrong.
Im finished with this thread


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RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 4:41:23 PM   
subtlebutterfly


Posts: 2230
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: Not your hood
Status: offline 		I will never marry an Irish man..I pray the women may be different.


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RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 4:59:31 PM   
wineDineNtieMe


Posts: 52
Joined: 7/9/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: subtlebutterfly

I will never marry an Irish man..I pray the women may be different.




I think that is the bottom line of this whole 3 page discussion!!!


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Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 5:02:41 PM   
LadyNTrainer


Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: brumindubsub
Lady trainer,i take it your a pro domme thats fair enough,but when a man pays you and says do want you want he as brought you paid for you your his.


"No, there is too much. Let me sum up."
- Inigo Montoya

Let me attempt to make some sense of your questionably involuted grammar and logic here, if this is at all possible.  Can you go to McDonald's and order a blow job?  You might try, but that's not on the menu, and most likely you'll end up on your ass and out the door.  The fact that you're paying to be there does not entitle you to "anything you want", nor is the pimply young fellow operating the cash register "yours" by virtue of a hamburger purchase.  Likewise, I recommend that you do not ask your plumber to fix your car, nor your auto mechanic to snake out your toilet.  When you hire a professional to do a job, you are entering into a transaction that has agreed-upon boundaries and expectations.  That transaction does not entitle you to anything beyond those boundaries.  It certainly does not entitle you to dominance or ownership over that individual.

I am, currently, taking on personal training clients with a kinky twist.  It can quite fairly be called pro domme work, since I do add kink to the usual repertoire of legitimate fitness and nutrition coaching.  Until recently I was working in an academic field.  The economy tanked my job along with a lot of others.  While I hunt for another in my somewhat rarefied and specialized field, I'm putting my personal trainer certifications to good use in a fun way. I have been active in the leather community for years, and I remain active in my personal and social life.  Nobody gets to take away my "real domme" card because I've also made the decision to go this route.

The folks who disrespect pro dommes and blather on about their ideas of what happens in a session are generally the ones who don't actually know what happens in a pro domme session.  It is true that some clients are "laundry list fetishists" and what they seek is a paid actress or entertainer, not submission at all.  Those transactions are basically the same as one you might have with any other paid professional.  You pay your fee, you get the agreed-upon service.  This is not dominance or submission on either end of the equation.  In other cases, the transaction is more about exchanging money for time and energy, or about something else entirely, and there is a varying degree of actual submission and desire to please in addition to the desire to have their own submissive needs satisfied.  There really isn't a good single pigeonhole you can fit these dynamics into.  There are just too many people and too many possibilities.


quote:

Dress it up anyway you want this is what you are a paid for sevice not a laywer not a doctor a paid for domme.Why so many pro dommes are trying to justify this is surprizeing me.Be proud of your job but to me and im not being stubin on this i just belive any domme that takes money for being domme is a sub,and a sub women is of no use to me.


People who are unable to articulate themselves in a thoughtful and reasonably well educated manner are of no use to me either, so we're quite on the same page here.  Have you considered hiring a professional tutor to improve your business English skills?  If so, would you consider your tutor to be a sub because he or she took money for helping you learn to read and write at an adult level?  What kind of sense does that make?

If your answer is, "But that's different.  It's not SEX," then you may want to do some hard thinking about why you hold these beliefs, and what justifies them. 

quote:

I dont think if i had a partner i would notlike them haveing other play partners at all.Call me old fashioned but if you have a long term partner and you have the need to see other people then your relionship has serious problems,maybe boredom i dont no but be careful,


Thank you for making it clear in your creatively articulated fashion that you have no respect for poly folks as well as pro dommes.  I feel now that I am in excellent company.  If you understand anything I'm saying here at all, which I doubt, feel free to grunt and nod or something.

(in reply to brumindubsub)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 5:11:03 PM   
Mastr4BustySluut


Posts: 3
Joined: 10/28/2008
Status: offline 		To me pro dommes are more like hookers. They are getting paid for guys to get their jollies off. Same as a hookers would.

(in reply to LadyNTrainer)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 5:17:47 PM   
LadyNTrainer


Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mastr4BustySluut

To me pro dommes are more like hookers. They are getting paid for guys to get their jollies off. Same as a hookers would.


Minus the sex, that's not a bad analogy. 

Really, you can put just about all "personal service" professionals in the same category, from various kinds of sex workers to (legitimate) masseuses and therapists to college tutors and personal trainers.  Yes, it does tend to be all about the client.  No, it does not degrade the person who is offering the service, or make them submissive, or entitle the client to any service that isn't clearly specified and negotiated for. 

(in reply to Mastr4BustySluut)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Are Pro Dommes Really subs - 7/27/2009 5:18:15 PM   
wineDineNtieMe


Posts: 52
Joined: 7/9/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mastr4BustySluut

To me pro dommes are more like hookers. They are getting paid for guys to get their jollies off. Same as a hookers would.




Hookers... just like what your profile says you're looking for... Awesome




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(in reply to Mastr4BustySluut)
Profile   Post #: 60
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