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RE: Financial issues - 3/12/2006 12:02:17 AM

MistressSassy66

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Personally,I hate dealing with money and bills...thats why slave bishop does it,I have more important things I'd rather be doing than being stuck to the checkbook.
she has a brain,I make her use it.

When it comes to the business side of it...I charge for the session,not the chat to get to know Me.

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RE: Financial issues - 3/12/2006 6:54:15 AM

strob

Posts: 100
Joined: 9/6/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressSassy66

Personally,I hate dealing with money and bills...thats why slave bishop does it,I have more important things I'd rather be doing than being stuck to the checkbook.
she has a brain,I make her use it.

When it comes to the business side of it...I charge for the session,not the chat to get to know Me.

I don't think that meaning of financial domination is who is and who is not dealing with money and bills. Just a sense of being financial in control or controled, should give the domme greater sense of power and make a sub/slave feel more like one...just my thoughts

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RE: Financial issues - 3/12/2006 12:44:30 PM

MistressSassy66

Posts: 1675
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quote:

ORIGINAL: strob

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressSassy66

Personally,I hate dealing with money and bills...thats why slave bishop does it,I have more important things I'd rather be doing than being stuck to the checkbook.
she has a brain,I make her use it.

When it comes to the business side of it...I charge for the session,not the chat to get to know Me.

I don't think that meaning of financial domination is who is and who is not dealing with money and bills. Just a sense of being financial in control or controled, should give the domme greater sense of power and make a sub/slave feel more like one...just my thoughts

I dont need to control the money to feel power.Infact you could say that by makeing her do it ,I'm using My power(do not like that word but for lack of another I'll use it.) to control the money.

Does having money in your pocket make you less submissive?
Just because slave bishop has money in her pocket for whatever...doesnt mean shes less submissive...it just means I dont have to be bothered with handing out money.

Technically(IMO)...that would mean I am in control if shes getting, lets call it an "allowance" for the week.

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RE: Financial issues - 3/12/2006 5:06:36 PM

MarinaBlack

Posts: 121
Joined: 8/6/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressSassy66

I dont need to control the money to feel power.Infact you could say that by makeing her do it ,I'm using My power(do not like that word but for lack of another I'll use it.) to control the money.

Does having money in your pocket make you less submissive?
Just because slave bishop has money in her pocket for whatever...doesnt mean shes less submissive...it just means I dont have to be bothered with handing out money.

Technically(IMO)...that would mean I am in control if shes getting, lets call it an "allowance" for the week.

You have a rather interesting dynamic with your slave. It just goes to show you the diversity in this scene. You gotta love it.

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RE: Financial issues - 3/12/2006 7:55:23 PM

thetammyjo

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressSassy66

Does having money in your pocket make you less submissive?
Just because slave bishop has money in her pocket for whatever...doesnt mean shes less submissive...it just means I dont have to be bothered with handing out money.

I'd say having money makes it possible for a slave or a submissive to pay for things and to give their dominant or owner gifts.

If I took all of Fox's money and dished out an allowance then I'd have to be thinking about if I wanted a gift and give him extra money. How much of a gift is that? And I do like getting gifts as signs he's thinking about me and how to make my life happier or easier.

I just really like having him offer me something he bought just because he thought about me or its a holiday or something.

Plus, I really find managing money to be completely stressful -- I don't need more of that, thank you very much.

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RE: Financial issues - 3/18/2006 8:15:25 AM

strob

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maybe a few too many different opinions on this matter to make any kind of conclusion, let alone decision if one should be needed.
quite a delicate theme, I guess.

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RE: Financial issues - 3/18/2006 1:41:38 PM

SweetDommes

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The opinion that matters most for you is yours - if you feel that you need to turn over control of your money to your PYL to truly belong to Her, then you have to find someone that is ok with being in control of the money (just make sure that you explain your feelings on the matter before asking such a loaded question as you did before).

There will never be a universal "right" or universal "wrong" on this topic - or 100s of others in and out of WIIWD. What is right for you, isn't right for me ... or TammyJo ... or any number of others who have/haven't posted on this thread ... What is right for me, isn't right for you ... or MarinaBlack ... or (again) any number of others who have/haven't posted here.

If the Domme that you were talking to before now understands what you meant and is ok with it - then that's great and I hope that things continue going well for the two of you. If she isn't, then unfortunately, that means that both of you need to keep looking. While it is ultimately the PYL who determines what will happen in the relationship, it's important that you find someone who has the same feelings about things that are important to you.

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RE: Financial issues - 3/20/2006 3:29:32 AM

strob

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quite right

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RE: Financial issues - 3/20/2006 6:28:30 AM

Jasmyn

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Joined: 2/6/2004
From: New Zealand
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quote:

ORIGINAL: strob
Just a sense of being financial in control or controled should give the domme greater sense of power and make a sub/slave feel more like one...just my thoughts

Strob, whether we like it or not the world we live in is money driven and to have money or to have access to money affords a sense of freedom, so like you say, it doesn't equate to who does the accounts, but rather who controls them; and that sense of freedom, money or having (in particularly) ready access to money, similarly resonnates as 'freedom' for submissives (and doms) who seek to be financially controlled or in financial control.

Some romanticise it all, wanting to turn over their worldly goods to a fem dom, any dom, as long as they are serving a Woman as they were born too. For others its as natural a progression of their submission to a strong confident woman. Imagine the headrush, that curtailling his ability to walk into a shop and do what he wants...ergo 'freedom'...is suddenly taken away from him. (yum yum)

To that end, I personally don't think of financial control as been anything different than to say making him wear lacey pink lingerie under his work shirts or having him masturbate at least once during work hours or him having to ask permission to go out with friends that weekend..they're all just parts that make up the sum of U/us.

Ps meant to add: it doesn't give me any more 'power' as such but it does offer another avenue for exercising the control I already have and offers them another avenue to give up control.

< Message edited by Jasmyn -- 3/20/2006 6:35:22 AM >

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RE: Financial issues - 3/20/2006 6:35:18 AM

DiannaVesta

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I’ve been doing this femdom thing a very long time. I can’t tell you how many women I personally know that didn’t take responsibility in control of financials issues and later sorry they didn’t. I don’t care what kind of relationship you’re in you need to know what’s going on and dominant women, not all but MANY, all too often let a submissive have complete control. When shit hits the fan they are devastated. This is especially true with professional scene player who are busy. I make my own money and I control the money from my slaves. If they live long distance obviously I don’t do this. They contribute, buy me gifts, etc. If they live in my household then they hand their earnings over to me. I set up an allowance and they use that however they want. Out of my house account the bills are paid, food is bought and I even set up an account for vacations, investments, etc. It’s not uncommon for me to enter into business deals with slaves but this is a separate matter. For instance right now I’ll buy some rental properties with a slave but we will do this legally with legal contracts & provisions in the event we are not together. To be honest I avoid relationships that are not enduring. I would never invest or allow anyone this close unless I knew that regardless of the course we would remain friends and still be able to handle business accordingly. But under my roof I rule everything. What you spend, what you eat, do, everything.

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RE: Financial issues - 3/20/2006 10:11:15 PM

MsSimone

Posts: 119
Joined: 7/15/2004
From: Chicago,Illinois
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Excellent insight! We so often hear about the issues people have with pro-dommes here but rarely the other side of the coin which is this exactly. I have this happen to me all the F#%@%#% time! It gets very old and frustrating. I enjoy true financial domination along with all my other fetishes but don;t try to lure me with it. No money is worth my intergrity.

In regards to your issue, I argee with the group. Only the lady herself knows why she reacted so. You will need to ask her directly.

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