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RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 9:42:37 AM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arillis

I think where the OP is concerned is she is perceiving death in terms of not being accepted by the gang she is part of while failing to recognize acceptance into that gang was never the intent in the first place.
Not everyone coming to these boards is searching for a counterpart, acceptance, or even diverseness in thinking’s. It is rather like going to a restaurant where the food is below your accustomed standard but time is limited and the restaurant is close. You appease the hunger while knowing you will dine later in far more elegant surroundings.


WOW... we have gangs here?    

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

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(in reply to Arillis)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 9:44:28 AM   
FullCircle


Posts: 5713
Joined: 11/24/2005
Status: offline 		Yeah the friends list is a good indicator of who is in each one.

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(in reply to Daddysredhead)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 9:45:31 AM   
SweetNika


Posts: 955
Joined: 4/19/2008
From: Forest Hills, Maryland
Status: offline 		No offense but we all know that there is a large group of regulars who have a "mob mentality" when it comes to these forums. To pretend it doesn't exist is silly. Personally I wouldn't have used the term gang but eh... it has the same affect.

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Nika


(in reply to Daddysredhead)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 9:46:42 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arillis
Not everyone coming to these boards is searching for a counterpart, acceptance, or even diverseness in thinking’s. It is rather like going to a restaurant where the food is below your accustomed standard but time is limited and the restaurant is close. You appease the hunger while knowing you will dine later in far more elegant surroundings.

It takes too much time out of your day to click on the message board that has all the higher-quality kinky people, so you'll settle for this place?

Clicking on different links saps my time and energy, too.  That's the only reason I post here: energy conservation.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to Arillis)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 9:47:09 AM   
BKSir


Posts: 4037
Joined: 4/8/2008
From: Salt Lake City, UT
Status: offline 		We got no mob here... another word about it, and I'll have to have Guido and Nunzio discuss with you the error of your misconceptions. 

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(in reply to SweetNika)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 9:49:35 AM   
LillyoftheVally


Posts: 1826
Joined: 7/22/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arillis
Not everyone coming to these boards is searching for a counterpart, acceptance, or even diverseness in thinking’s. It is rather like going to a restaurant where the food is below your accustomed standard but time is limited and the restaurant is close. You appease the hunger while knowing you will dine later in far more elegant surroundings.

It takes too much time out of your day to click on the message board that has all the higher-quality kinky people, so you'll settle for this place?

Clicking on different links saps my time and energy, too. That's the only reason I post here: energy conservation.



Energy Conservation = Bye then Arillis


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Nah I am not happy to see you either

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 9:51:03 AM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BKSir

We got no mob here... another word about it, and I'll have to have Guido and Nunzio discuss with you the error of your misconceptions. 


*hugs BK* 

Thank goodness someone got my sarcasm...

*geez* 

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to BKSir)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 9:55:56 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FullCircle

I admit the scope of the example could be a little beyond this here thread.
this thread...or me?


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Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 9:57:17 AM   
FullCircle


Posts: 5713
Joined: 11/24/2005
Status: offline 		I'm sure nothing is beyond you.

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Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 10:04:59 AM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline 		Ok, correct me if I'm wrong here -- but I think this post was more about whether or not certain behaviors or attitudes will make it more difficult to make certain kinds of connections here... for example, if you -are-, supposedly, looking for a Mistress, it does seem to me that it would be rather self-defeating to come to the boards talking about how all Mistresses are whores, or that women, in general, are horrible individuals.

In the same way, it has been shown through several threads that, for a dominant-type individual who is -seeking out- submissive individuals, letting on that one has issues (medical, control, anger, drug, drinking, or even conceptual issues) pretty much guarantees that a significant portion of the submissives who -do- post here are going to lose any interest they had.

I don't think this is about popularity at all -- it is about knowing why one is here. Frankly, you can learn a LOT about people by the way that they post and the things that they say -- not just on the Community boards, but over on the OT boards as well. I've learned a -lot- about other peoples' perspectives through my time here, and honestly, it really has affected my interest in spending time with that person.

That being said, I am not a proponent of changing one's nic here unless one came here under false pretenses and is striving to remedy that situation. I think that we have some folks who post certain things just to stir the pot and see what will bubble to the surface, and if that's their goal, then outrageous, or even inconsistent, behavior on their parts is just one of the aspects of that pot-stirring, and they probably couldn't care less whether they're accepted or not, and if they get tired of pot-stirring and their goals change, then by all means, they should probably change their nic to give themselves a fresh start, but for those who are looking -here- as a way to initiate a relationship, then yes, what they say and how they say it could, in some cases, make or break that person's capacity to find what they're looking for within this community, and that is -not- inappropriate, IMO... what better way to know whether a person that one is considering a relationship with is truly of like mind than to go and read what xhe says in a variety of situations. However, changing one's nic because one made some unpopular remark or exposed some uncomfortable truth about oneself -- no, not the way to handle things, IMO. I think it's important to hang in there, and to let people get a more... 360 degree view of the person and the circumstances. Otherwise, one becomes just another flake when repeating phrases or common themes show one out, which, IMO, they always will.

Now, I've been on CM under another nic, when our household had a 'group/couple' nic, but our circumstances had changed so much when I returned, and my goals and my companions goals had changed sufficiently that I was no longer comfortable speaking always on behalf of the House -- so when I returned, I garnered myself a separate profile. That being said, I think that, though experience and new ideas have colored some of my beliefs, and will continue to do so, who I am at my core -is- reflected through my posts, and I like it that way. I'm certain that what I've said on these boards has made me unsuitable as a companion, and perhaps even as a friend, to some others who have said their peace here, and that is fine with me, because it helps to assure that I am spending time with people for whom my presence is a positive experience, and the same in return.

DC

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***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

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(in reply to FullCircle)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 10:06:34 AM   
Apocalypso


Posts: 1104
Joined: 4/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead


WOW... we have gangs here?    

*Smoochs one of his friends*

*Private injoke*

*Tells different friend how much he likes their photo*

*Two pages of posts by self and those two friends*

*Gets outraged at somebody suggesting that there are cliques on the board*


_____________________________

If you're going to quote from the Book of Revelation,
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There's no "s", it's the Book of Revelation,
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(in reply to Daddysredhead)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 10:22:41 AM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		Again, it's called sarcasm. 
Of course there are groups of people here who are very close, whether in real time or just here on the computer.  I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing.  People are drawn to those who of like mind.  Nothing good or bad about it necessarily.  Just like in real time, there will be people who do or say something that offends one, and by association perhaps, it offends many.  I'm not making a judgment as to whether it is right or wrong to "back" your friends like that, but it happens, it's common.  If someone messes with my family or friends, and I believe that person to be clearly in the wrong, I will go to the mat for the person I feel has been wronged.

As to the original question, I think being honest if you screw up in some way in a post, apologize for being a jerk or whatever - if that apology is sincere - is more noble than creating a new screen name.  I would respect that much more.  We're all human.  We're all accountable for the good and the not so good that we put out there.

wee typo

< Message edited by Daddysredhead -- 8/16/2009 10:24:29 AM >

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to Apocalypso)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 10:28:40 AM   
SlyStone


Posts: 398
Joined: 12/23/2006
From: Chicago
Status: offline
quote:

Is there such a thing as death by posting?



I think on your 1999th posting the mission impossible theme song should start blaring through your pc speakers and end with the; This profile will self destruct in 5 second  warning, after which time you will cease to exist.....



Because, if you continue posting, it is inevitable that you will become deranged, and insane.


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Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.

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(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 12:47:32 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arillis

I think where the OP is concerned is she is perceiving death in terms of not being accepted by the gang she is part of while failing to recognize acceptance into that gang was never the intent in the first place.
Not everyone coming to these boards is searching for a counterpart, acceptance, or even diverseness in thinking’s. It is rather like going to a restaurant where the food is below your accustomed standard but time is limited and the restaurant is close. You appease the hunger while knowing you will dine later in far more elegant surroundings.


WOW... we have gangs here?    


Are there hand signals? Is there an illustrated text that depicts these hand signals? Are there gang colours, aka, something I need to avoid wearing now? Are there clearly delineated turf boundaries? Should we have turf wars?

These are things we need to know!!

(just tell me which corner has the dealer selling the best ganja k?)

Seriously, I couldn't tell you, without looking, who is on my friends list. There is a very real possiblity that I have had strong debates with someone on there. I don't care. I do my level best, to hold myself to a certain standard, when debating. If I maintain my own personal standards, I don't give a flying rat's ass who likes, or dislikes, what I have to say. It's only my opinion regarding a particular subject, nothing more, nothing less.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Daddysredhead)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 1:02:35 PM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

No, this isn't a topic about any of us who are so addicted to this site that we've literally died at the keyboard. 

Let Me set the stage for you.  Some of you other forum addicts are going to recognize the references to other threads that I'm about to mention.  While I'm not trying to embarrass anyone, I have to give some description so people can understand what I'm talking about.

On the Mistress board, a male sub makes his first post.  In that post, he displays his negative attitude and continues on the thread to display his hatred for women in power.

In the same thread, another male sub comes along and insults two women who are regular posters.

In the Ask A Submissive section, a Dominant creates a post that basically outs someone else.  He continues to show his behind until the thread is pulled.

Another thread in the off topic section, a Mistress laments about her over indulgence with alcohol.


In your opinion, would you think that some of these things are basically death by posting?  That the writers have basically shot themselves in the foot to the degree that the best advice that you can give them is that it's time to change their screen name because they have made such a terrible impression?

For Myself, I'm going to say yes to all.  I tend to think those kinds of things are remembered by, at minimum, forum regulars.  In the case of the submissive males, the negative attitude towards women certainly allows at least a side of their personality out.  In the case of the Dominant outing someone, how could a sub trust such a Dominant?  Over indulgence of alcohol is often seen as a red flag, isn't it?

So, what is your take on these kinds of things?  Would you recommend in these cases that a person just create a new profile and start over?  Is there such a thing as death by posting?



I do not care about such people, I do not give them any power over me that would make me wish to reply to them, showing them the error of their ways.
Did it ever occur to the OP that these indivduals are posting in an effort simply to garner attemtion?


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Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
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(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 1:42:25 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Acer49
I do not care about such people, I do not give them any power over me that would make me wish to reply to them, showing them the error of their ways.
Did it ever occur to the OP that these indivduals are posting in an effort simply to garner attemtion?


That's a good question.  I don't think that could be the case with all of them.  In the case of the ones stemming from the thread on Ask A Mistress, I think it was more a reaction to the male subs feeling a bit put off by the context of the thread and feeling that they may not have quite measured up to the subject.  It seemed more like a lashing out thing.  (Of course, please understand that this was My personal opinion alone and they may have had other motivations.)

On the Ask A Submissive instance, I honestly believe that the originator of the thread had been scammed or duped and was hoping that by outing someone, he would find that individual r/t.  (That one was kind of less than bright on two counts.)

As for the last, it very well could have been for attention, but probably not the smartest way to get it.


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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 2:30:01 PM   
VanIsleKnight


Posts: 283
Joined: 8/4/2009
Status: offline 		There've been a time where I committed death by posting on a fan forum for a series of novels, however the situation was horribly warranted.  I think though that some of the biggest reasons that some people do it is for the sake of ego, pride, and at times whatever perceived "territory" they have.  I've a story to tell actually.

For years there was this silly ego war going on behind the scenes as the forum split off into three different factions, Alpha (operators, majority staff, and close friends) Beta (partial staff, friends of partial staff) and Charlie (partial staff, friends and family of partial staff, though they shared close friendships with both Alpha and Beta as well).  Beta had been pissed because one of their members didn't become a moderator or leader of semi-groups called "Clans" and subsequently decided they were going to invite the people they wanted over to their own forum and bitch out and make fun of the leader that was chosen as well as the clan forever after.  Alpha considered this recruiting and member stealing, and got extremely pissy about it, and started to ban people left and right.  I believe some of the moderators from Beta also used their knowledge or powers as a mod to get some IP addresses of various people so they could IP ban them from their own site to prevent spying. At any rate, Alpha and Beta were at each other's throats and there were "spies" sent to each other's respective forums just to see what they were doing, report bitching, and in Alpha's case, ban anyone that was a regular poster at Beta's forum.

After that entire fiasco died down, there was problems between Alpha and Charlie that I'm not completely aware of, however what I do know was that a lot of ruckus and venemous spit was spat because Alpha was calling themselves the official (they loved throwing that word around) forum said novel series.  Charlie were actually some relatively well off folks and one was a businessman and had actually bought the license for the novel series (not sure if that's the actual term, essentially he was the 'owner' and had a lot invested in the movie, the books, etc etc) and because they had started a roleplaying forum of their own, took issue with the whole "official" thing when in actual fact Alpha legally wasn't.  They were just around longer, and for a period of time perhaps they were, but they were terrible at handling the franchise, the official site was terrible and never updated, and in general it was just good that someone who gave a damn and was more interested in someone else's work and not their own (the owner/operator from Alpha was an author as well).

Anyways, another big ugly war erupted, and in general members Alpha once again was publically blasting and banning people left right and center.  One of the idiots from Charlie decided to go and make matters worse by signing into Alpha with the sole purpose of pissing them off "legally" (not breaking any of their official or unofficial rules but getting really close).

So now what was one a unified happy family that celebrated and loved the work of a great author is now three separate, smaller groups that generally don't like each other.  At the very least, in general Alpha doesn't like anyone from Beta or Charlie and Beta and Charlie don't like Alpha, but they're fine with each other since they had no issue with one another and even had a common enemy.  I had friends in all three groups and really a lot of the shit that went on just came down to pride and ego.  The Beta members were pissed one of their own didn't become a clan leader, Alpha was pissed someone dared to go to another forum as well as their own, Alpha was pissed that Charlie was legally the new official forum, a member Charlie was pissed that his friends were getting banned left right and center, etc etc.  There was tons of fluffed and ruffled feathers, ego pride posts, angry declarations, and other types of bullshit that went on.

Honestly, Alpha and most of their members were the worst.  They were haughty, egotistical, and bigoted against anyone else that wasn't in their social clique.  They condoned and crucified anyone else that would make a mistake but made an uproar and pulled all kinds of crap whenever their own actions were questioned.  When I commited my death by posting, it was basically because they deserved to be told off for all the crap they've pulled.  Plus interest.  Do I regret it?  Not especially, the roleplaying was fun but that was about it, and that was only one section of the boards.  I would however change the way I did things if I could, most likely just walk away and not get involved because everything was horribly -stupid- to begin with. 

Funnily enough, I still get e-mails from them in my junk folder and at the moment they're upset because they don't have an active memberbase anymore.  Gee, I wonder why.

(note, this all happened years ago and events have become fuzzy over time.)



< Message edited by VanIsleKnight -- 8/16/2009 2:37:35 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 2:38:16 PM   
GoddessImaginos


Posts: 1493
Joined: 8/5/2009
From: A small blue planet near Alpha Centauri
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SlyStone

quote:

Is there such a thing as death by posting?



I think on your 1999th posting the mission impossible theme song should start blaring through your pc speakers and end with the; This profile will self destruct in 5 second  warning, after which time you will cease to exist.....



Because, if you continue posting, it is inevitable that you will become deranged, and insane.



..you speak as if Wwe aren't already.
Does falling asleep in the comp chair with your hand on the mouse count..?

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Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 2:51:00 PM   
Aylee


Posts: 24103
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: VanIsleKnight

There've been a time where I committed death by posting on a fan forum for a series of novels,
{snip}


Okay . . . I read that three times and I did not understand ANY of it.  Other than I think that one website split into three different websites. 

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Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Death By Posting - 8/16/2009 3:01:06 PM   
VanityFix


Posts: 141
Joined: 7/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Apocalypso

quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead


WOW... we have gangs here?    

*Smoochs one of his friends*

*Private injoke*

*Tells different friend how much he likes their photo*

*Two pages of posts by self and those two friends*

*Gets outraged at somebody suggesting that there are cliques on the board*



i see this a fair bit sometimes, posts can get kinda cliquey as some older(on time on site not the granddaddies out there) start talking to each other, you can get a vibe that the forum is populated by a big happy exclusive family,
but in reality i think there are many cliques, rouge agents, and wondering retards, i simply dont post where i see the above cliquey crap. death by posting will only hurt your street cred with one group for the most part, so i think dying by posting is pretty hard without posting alot

also, on a side note...
WESTERN CANADIAN BISEXUAL SWITCHES REPRESENTING!

(in reply to Apocalypso)
Profile   Post #: 80
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