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What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 1:42:02 AM   
Bimtrain


Posts: 40
Joined: 8/14/2009
Status: offline 		I'm fairly new to the BDSM scene as a whole. I've spent a lot of time within my specific fetish but only just recently found out it, at least in part, blended into BDSM. So forgive me if I don't understand this.

If it's not a Daddy you seek than why say "No one under 40"? If a dom can give you exactly what you need why would age matter? Wouldn't it be better to have a more viral man in good shape? This should be doubly true for those seeking 24/7 situations that ARE NOT COMMON. There are few doms out there you are looking for the type of dom/sub relationship that I am so if you're a sub looking for the same I would think you'd be open to whoever can provide it.
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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 2:08:26 AM   
hlen5


Posts: 5890
Joined: 3/2/2008
Status: offline 		Welcome to the boards, Bimtrain!! I think rather than viral, you meant virile (at least I hope so!!).

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 2:44:31 AM   
peppermint


Posts: 5169
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline 		It's called personal preference.  There does not need to be any particular reason for this preference.  People have the right to their preferences.  The preference does not have to make sense to you.  It is not a preference to punish you in particular.  It just is.  

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 2:55:38 AM   
Bimtrain


Posts: 40
Joined: 8/14/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5

Welcome to the boards, Bimtrain!! I think rather than viral, you meant virile (at least I hope so!!).


lol, wow. I think that's my cue to get some sleep. That might be my worst typing/spelling mistake EVER, lol
quote:

ORIGINAL: peppermint

It's called personal preference.  There does not need to be any particular reason for this preference.  People have the right to their preferences.  The preference does not have to make sense to you.  It is not a preference to punish you in particular.  It just is.  


I get that and don't really have a problem with it. I was just curious behind some of the thinking behind it.

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 2:55:42 AM   
Eigenaar


Posts: 352
Joined: 5/3/2008
Status: offline 		I agree with you that it is ridiculous to be as rigorous as a lot of  female submissives concerning age. I experienced females in their thirties asking me where I got the idiotic idea they would be interested in a dom past 40! I encountered all sorts here, even bald females saying they despise men with long hair! While they are in their right the fact remains they ridicule themselves.

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 2:55:45 AM   
LillyoftheVally


Posts: 1826
Joined: 7/22/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Bimtrain
If a dom can give you exactly what you need why would age matter?


Because the age may make up what the person needs. I am 23 (its lush) I have a great family, two sisters a brother and an ace father. I spend loads of time with them, I want to be able to eat meals with them with my partner, if I took home someone 40+ eye brows would be raised, and I would be uncomfortable, I did it actually, dated a 40 year old, and the age gap did affect my ability to be happy. Therefore it is a requirement for me now.

So what would be better for me, is to have someone who can give me what I need power exchange wise, companionship wise, looks wise, age wise - why bloody settle?

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 3:40:51 AM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		because when I was searching it's just creepy to date a man who's closer in age or the same age as my kid.

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 5:10:51 AM   
subdevra


Posts: 37
Joined: 3/28/2008
Status: offline 		it is more than what a Dom can "do for me" in terms of satisfying the D/s parts of a relationship. for that is the key. it is only a part of the whole. i need to be able to talk to Him on other subjects to have the same frames of reference -- the same tv shows and music as kids for example. to have lived through certain events, etc.

devra

p.s. and when i was searching, i was one of those that would put "not under 40" on my profile.

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 5:15:04 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline 		For me it's just a personal preference. I want a partner my own age, not the age of my kids.

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 6:02:01 AM   
fadedshadow


Posts: 751
Joined: 4/27/2009
From: a place
Status: offline 		i'm gonna go out on a limb but i would say...preference perhaps?

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 6:26:11 AM   
SweetNika


Posts: 955
Joined: 4/19/2008
From: Forest Hills, Maryland
Status: offline 		I have dated someone younger than me and it was hard because our life experiences were very different. I want to be with someone I can share experiences with and NEVER would get involved with someone under 21 (legal or not ) because it would really squig out my teenage daughter. lol Nor would i date someone old enough to be my father because it squigs me.

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 6:37:36 AM   
fadedshadow


Posts: 751
Joined: 4/27/2009
From: a place
Status: offline 		i'd like to date someone older than me

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 7:49:00 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Eigenaar

I agree with you that it is ridiculous to be as rigorous as a lot of  female submissives concerning age. I experienced females in their thirties asking me where I got the idiotic idea they would be interested in a dom past 40! I encountered all sorts here, even bald females saying they despise men with long hair! While they are in their right the fact remains they ridicule themselves.


No they do not redicule themselves, they are simply expressing a personal preference. We all have them. It is just that some people are more comfortable expressing them than others.

Should I get upset when a bi-sexual woman tells me she cannot imagine submitting to a woman? I don't, it is their personal preference. Not a personal attack on me.

People really need to quit taking this shit personally and getting their undies bunched.


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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 8:10:53 AM   
CarrieO


Posts: 2432
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Bimtrain

I'm fairly new to the BDSM scene as a whole. I've spent a lot of time within my specific fetish but only just recently found out it, at least in part, blended into BDSM. So forgive me if I don't understand this.

Welcome!

If it's not a Daddy you seek than why say "No one under 40"?
Personal preference?  No different than men saying they want  "no one over 30".

If a dom can give you exactly what you need why would age matter?
See above answer.

Wouldn't it be better to have a more viral man in good shape?
I was involved with a much younger man (20-something)  a few years back, who was quite virile and in shape.  Likewise, I've know a few much older men who were equally so. 

This should be doubly true for those seeking 24/7 situations that ARE NOT COMMON. There are few doms out there you are looking for the type of dom/sub relationship that I am so if you're a sub looking for the same I would think you'd be open to whoever can provide it.
It all comes down to personal preference...nothing more, nothing less.
Of course, after looking at your profile, I'm not really sure of the reason for the question as what you're looking for is quite different than the daddy/girl relationships I've known.  
Regardless, please try to remember...just because a sub is looking for 24/7 doesn't mean they don't have standards and expectations.....don't you?




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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 8:16:53 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I needed someone with more in common with me than with my father or my offspring.
I need someone who I have commonalities with. Who I share friends with. Same taste in music. Remembers where they were when JFK died, remembers watching the Vietnam War nightly as a teen and knows how those unrestricted newscasts colored a generation's thought and feelings on politics.

In other words a life partner, not someone to have kinky sex with.

< Message edited by DesFIP -- 8/21/2009 8:18:51 AM >

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 8:50:19 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		For me i am 39 (almost 40) and my Master is older then me which works out good because my preference is for older men and he is the perfect man for me.  If i was still looking i could not submit to anyone under 35 just would not do it for me.  I also have an upper age limit which is 63 older than that would not do it for me.   Of course as i get older the age limits will change.  I really cannot see myself submitting to someone more than 5 years my junior.  Altough i like older men i also cannot see submitting to some more that 25 years my senior, at least at this time i cannot,  Depends really on the man.  As for right now i am wonderfully happy with the Master i belong to.

Matt's littleone

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 8:51:28 AM   
KCalli


Posts: 81
Joined: 8/4/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

because when I was searching it's just creepy to date a man who's closer in age or the same age as my kid.



(grinning) I understand that one, I would love to find a "younger" Dom, on one hand just for the fun of it all, but it would be difficult as he would also be interacting with my kids, who would likely be his age or not far from it. Although it would be fun, for 24/7 instead of day dreams, I would have an older Dom any day. I need that "more mature" security thing going on. I may have a little grey going on, but still like a daddy figure of sorts.

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 10:10:36 AM   
Eigenaar


Posts: 352
Joined: 5/3/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: Eigenaar

No they do not redicule themselves, they are simply expressing a personal preference. We all have them.


It is not possible to have a preference for 40 up and reject everybody under 40. I have a preference for red hair but this does not mean you will be blocked when you have black hair. ''No one under 40'' is not a preference. It is ridiculing and limiting, your ideal partner is liable to be under 40. A lesbian has a preference for females but most have sex with men also which makes them bisexual. A bisexual woman not imagining submitting to a woman is something else. And we are not being upset here as far as I know.

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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 10:49:30 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Soooooooo, they block you and don't want to be bothered reading your emails, that makes them ridiculous???

I suppose you believe that tossing most junk mail I receive in my home mailbox is ridiculous also? Or having telemarketing phone calls blocked?

< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 8/21/2009 10:54:24 AM >

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Eigenaar)
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RE: What's with the minimum age? - 8/21/2009 10:56:06 AM   
LillyoftheVally


Posts: 1826
Joined: 7/22/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Eigenaar
. A lesbian has a preference for females but most have sex with men also which makes them bisexual.


Most? Really? What about people who just like both?

Sorry your arguing is really illogical

_____________________________

'My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'

Nah I am not happy to see you either

(in reply to Eigenaar)
Profile   Post #: 20
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