my apologies and punishment (Full Version)

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Rainfire -> my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:14:28 AM)

I would like to apologize to all here for my actions and communications. I have been corrected today that I have been in error on a number of things and told that I would post my admissions here.

First off, I have accepted money from a dear friend who thought to help and instead, I have hurt Lumus by not telling Him of the help received. This has been corrected and you will be paid back. I should not have asked for help or mentioned it without going to Him first. I am to go to Him first for all things, as is proper.

Secondly, I have been in contact with several males including of the Dominant side. This was wrong and I shall have no further contact with any male except Bear. This was further aggravated by the fact that He told me to not have any contact with a couple of males and they were added to a social networking site. In addition, while I meant no harm, I understand that the following message "P.S. After a long and arduous discussion yesterday, it was decided that I did not need permission to cmail people from the boards nor do they need permission to cmail me in return as in His own words "what's online is online." :)"  is seen as flirting and seeking to get another male in an unseemly fashion. I apologize for those words and inappropriateness they have caused. Due to my error, all further contacts will be monitored. I am not to be trusted as I breached the trust of my Dominant and Husband.

Thirdly, I am not worthy to wear His collar and hope one day to earn its return. I have hurt Him deeply and beg forgiveness. I will work on earning His trust and collar back while devoting myself to Him and Him alone.

Please accept my apologies and breach of trust to my friends.

Rain 



sirsholly -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:24:03 AM)

Rain...we have to talk.



tammystarm -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:31:28 AM)

omg..........................................



LadyHibiscus -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:33:15 AM)

What Holly said.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:35:02 AM)

CMAIL HOLLS



porcelaine -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:35:08 AM)

Rain,

it takes a lot of courage to admit when we're wrong and have unintentionally caused harm to another. even though your admissions were dictated by another, the heartfelt emotion in your words is difficult to ignore. i can only hope that the pain has a higher purpose and offers a springboard for change and a deeper bond between you and yours. may time heal your wounds and provide inspiration for the forgiveness you owe yourself.

porcelaine



Sunnyfey -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:39:48 AM)

*hugs* I'll support you and Lumus in his choices for your relationship. Even if it only means I get to give you e-hugs when you need them.

I know you will do what is right and honorable by you and yours. Keep your chin up.



Level -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:44:34 AM)

Trying to choose my words carefully here.

Rain, I believe Lumus is a reasonable man, and that you are a good woman, and that you will earn his collar back. I don't know the details of what happened, beyond what you posted, but I will say that, certainly as a man, if y'all are having a rough go financially, and took money without his knowledge, even though the intent was good, that can strike at a man's core. And, if transparency is something he demands, as is his right, then that too would hurt.

I do not in any way, shape, or form believe you would EVER intentionally hurt Lumus, and I am sure he knows that, too.



tammystarm -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:51:27 AM)

big hugs to rain!  mucho loves rain! hate that it came to that! and WTF mate!



DesFIP -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:55:41 AM)

Hugs and sympathy. And hoping this isn't actually founded on your venting about having ultimate responsibility for a person you don't have any power to see the right things are done for.



Phoenixpower -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 10:56:16 AM)

Big hugs to our rainy bird...I am sure you can fix that unpleasent situation...I feel for you as I know how it feels like (though not in the context of d/s). Best wishes [:o]



BOUNTYHUNTER -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 11:02:06 AM)

Rain..We all do things that hurts the ones we love where we intend to or not, the important thing here you have owned up to your mistakes and hes giving you a chance to earn his forgiveness, I am sure he has forgiven you..I made mistake with diane and we are seprated trying to work out the problems,I turn into an asshole due to the pain and pain pills, I love her but is love enought to win her back.., I am try hard to woo back the woman I love,The woman of my life, the reason I wake up in the morning because she is there byside me.. I asked her forgiveness and another chance so we shall see..so like I said we all make mistakes, we should only learn by those mistakes and not make them again...



lovingpet -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 11:03:00 AM)

I don't know what all has transpired here, but I hope for healing. If I can help. my cmail is open. Hugs sweetie and my best to you both and Mr. Smarties

lovingpet



lronitulstahp -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 11:08:05 AM)

It always hurts most when you learn that you may have hurt the one whose very heart beats with your own. That in itself can be lesson enough.

Lumus & rain....i wish you both an opportunity to come closer and learn more of the depths of  the love you share through all of this.



sirsholly -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 11:08:09 AM)

quote:

if y'all are having a rough go financially, and took money without his knowledge, even though the intent was good, that can strike at a man's core. And, if transparency is something he demands, as is his right, then that too would hurt.


Ok...allow me to make one thing very clear here (addressing the topic, not the wonderful Level).

It was me that is responsible for the money issue between Rain and Lumus. Rain never, ever asked for a dime, never hinted, etc. I knew her PayPal addy because she gave it to me at my request when i sent her a gift card for the holidays.

What i did i did on my own. If there is blame, it is mine here for disrespecting their relationship by giving Rain absolutely no choice but to accept it.



tammystarm -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 11:21:39 AM)

Holly you are a dear friend. Thanks for posting the above.



DarkSteven -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 11:35:12 AM)

rain, I'm assuming that there is no issue when a man communicates with you through posting here... I am so sorry for the rift.



Musicmystery -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 11:41:22 AM)

You both think and worry too much.



tammystarm -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 11:46:52 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

rain, I'm assuming that there is no issue when a man communicates with you through posting here... I am so sorry for the rift.

but dark how can anyone take you seriously, afterall for how long did you have a potty in the background of your pic! smiles and friendly hugs



Lumus -> RE: my apologies and punishment (9/13/2009 12:13:35 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

if y'all are having a rough go financially, and took money without his knowledge, even though the intent was good, that can strike at a man's core. And, if transparency is something he demands, as is his right, then that too would hurt.


Ok...allow me to make one thing very clear here (addressing the topic, not the wonderful Level).

It was me that is responsible for the money issue between Rain and Lumus. Rain never, ever asked for a dime, never hinted, etc. I knew her PayPal addy because she gave it to me at my request when i sent her a gift card for the holidays.

What i did i did on my own. If there is blame, it is mine here for disrespecting their relationship by giving Rain absolutely no choice but to accept it.



Nope, not your fault - but then, you've read the cmail.  I'll leave it at that, this isn't a thing for folk to take sides over.  As touched upon by others earlier, it's about creating the ability to redress things from square one.  That's not as bad as it sounds.  I'll leave the thread to Rain but will happily answer any mails with questions.  After all, those who know Me remember I hate drama.





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