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RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 11:38:25 AM   
Aynne88


Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline 		Hey Andi, welcome to collarme forums. That is why I hardly ever post here any more. Too many self proclaimed experts, passive aggressiveness, and people with big huge "LABEL" guns. Not fun. Sorry you had to experience it, but it isn't worth getting irked over. I read your thread and comments and had to post. I absolutely got what you and your Dom were saying and it sounds like a hot sexy time, and glad you both enjoyed. Not once did I think he was belittling a real rape experience or comparing it to one, semantics aside. Enjoy each other honey. :)



quote:

ORIGINAL: SlutAndi

Oh for the love of sweeeet cadbury's chocolate bar can we please move on from this.

It is clear now what the OP was meaning... yes some incorrect wording, can we just leave it there?

Either we discuss actual point of the thread of just leave it right there.Its going to go round in circles and YES the OP has realised his mistake.. no need for it to be rubbed in.

Its unfortunate that this has left everyone to get off on the wrong foot.. a real shame to be honest. Maybe amends can be made..:)

With that its bedtime, good night and take care.


_____________________________

As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)



(in reply to SlutAndi)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 3:52:36 PM   
OrionAndi


Posts: 73
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Look Jezza, OA, or whoever you are. The problem is not so much that you chose the wrong word. The problem is that you aren't taking responsibility for it. You could have avoided all the drama by simply apologising for thinking this was in any way equivalent to some 300 pound gorilla coming up behind a woman in a parking garage, putting his gun to her head, and raping her while her kids watched.

Instead you whined about us picking on you, and then you compounded your mistakes by saying that you're more extreme than we are.

You claim to be dominant, so act like a man and take responsibility for your words and actions. Your sub stood up to the plate, you didn't. And that isn't right.

Orion:

No offense, DesFIP & certain others...

But get a fucking life. How the hell is a man being thrown on his back and taken my his lady equivalent to a woman being violently raped a gunpoint in front of her children? Every other post of yours has made sense to me but i'd suggest you interpret Written English before passing such harsh and incorrect judgements. I know Andi's gonna kick my arse and accuse ME the one of being antagonistic, my how about YOU a.learn to read and comprehend the Queen's Plain and B. get a fucking life?

It's not every day a bloke like me becomes the "sub". And TBH, I had NO CHOICE at all. She basically threw me on my back, held me down and had her wicked way with me, and it was ALL for her pleasure. Is this not analogous to rape? Even when I protested, she ignored me and took me like her bitch. I've never experienced that before with anyone, and I've had aq pretty passionate love-life in the past.

As for "not taking responsibility for it"... Responsibility for WHAT, exactly? For certain people who fly off the handle with knee-jerk reactions without properly reading the OP? For people who misinterpret perfectly well laid out thoughts, emotions and sentiments? I THINK FUCKING NOT.

No. I'm sorry - but I will NOT apologize because someone else is simply too stupid to interpret and comprehend plain English.

I put forward a description of events and the deep emotional effect it had on me - and it bloody hard for me to do that but Andi had convinced this was a mature board. I was hoping to hear from other men (or maybe lesbian women) that had similar experiences. That is all. If one single word fucks your head so much that some of you go into knee-jerk flame-war mode then I suggest a psychiatrist might be in order.

Oh and by the way, before you respond again read the first four posts of this topic again. Then RE-READ my OP including the TITLE (ever heard of titles? :roll: ).

And please flame JezzaV (me) if this reaction offends you - Andi just wants to make friends here (as do I) but we've agreed to use this shared login from now on so as not cause confusion.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 3:57:54 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

And TBH, I had NO CHOICE at all


I've been pretty much on y'all's side in this, but those kind of comments, ugh, don't help. Unless you have a physical ailment that makes you much weaker than normal, then yes, you did have a choice. Or Andi is some kind of super-ninja chick.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to OrionAndi)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 4:51:32 PM   
Kalista07


Posts: 4240
Joined: 7/1/2007
Status: offline 		i'm just a little confused....So if i put that i think all the dom's should be 'castrated' ya'll will be okay with that right??

i mean....come on....i used the "inverted comma's" that are suddenly the be all, excuse all, and cure all for everything....

Hell, maybe i can say, do, or tell anyone anything around here...hmmmm...i'm thinking the Mods might not like that so much...
call me crazy and all.
Kali 

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“Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it.”
~~Sweedish Proverb


(in reply to Level)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 4:54:49 PM   
Sunnyfey


Posts: 1436
Joined: 9/21/2007
From: OK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

quote:

And TBH, I had NO CHOICE at all


I've been pretty much on y'all's side in this, but those kind of comments, ugh, don't help. Unless you have a physical ailment that makes you much weaker than normal, then yes, you did have a choice. Or Andi is some kind of super-ninja chick.


I vote super ninja chick, cuz.....ninjas are in fact better then pirates. Just sayin.


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Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 4:57:13 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline 		It's not the same thing, Kali. Using "raped" is a fairly common term used to describe vigorous sex; "castrated" isn't.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to Kalista07)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 4:57:42 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionAndi

I know Andi's gonna kick my arse and accuse ME the one of being antagonistic


Two options of interpreting this line, imo...

1)  She's right; or
2)  She really is a super-ninja chick, and you are both switches.

But I've been wrong before.

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to OrionAndi)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 5:00:03 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
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quote:

Sunny wrote:

I vote super ninja chick, cuz.....ninjas are in fact better then pirates. Just sayin.


Now, that's just crazy talk! And on international Talk Like A Pirate day, to boot.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to Level)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 5:03:22 PM   
OrionAndi


Posts: 73
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

quote:

And TBH, I had NO CHOICE at all


I've been pretty much on y'all's side in this, but those kind of comments, ugh, don't help. Unless you have a physical ailment that makes you much weaker than normal, then yes, you did have a choice. Or Andi is some kind of super-ninja chick.
Agreed with ya there, but in all honesty I dont blame him, to be accused over and over again for not being able to tell the difference between play and the real thing simply because they chose to read what they wanted to read is pretty harsh. Bound get anyones back up.

Anyhoo..
Ninja i can do, never underestimate the power of a woman *Hiiiiiiii YAAA*

"Everybody was kung-fu fighting..HA Those cats were fast as lightning HA HOO HA In fact it was a little bit frightning "

*busts a move*

Andi x


< Message edited by OrionAndi -- 9/19/2009 5:04:09 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 5:06:24 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		What if Kali said "that guy ought to be castrated" while talking about a guy who had upset her or had wronged her (perhaps by cheating or screwing around on her)?   If she didn't really mean he should have his testicles removed, but rather she was pissed as all hell at him, would there be some men who wouldn't like her choice of words?

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to Level)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 5:22:46 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline 		Andi, I understand that feeling like your words are being turned against you is aggravating. And I'm sure you make a terrific Ninja

Red, yes, there would be men upset in the scenario you mentioned. Still, one difference is that the OP's "rape" was meant in a way to convey something positive, and it has a history of being used in that way, so there is some precedence. I know of no positive usage of "castrate" though.

I do understand someone feeling upset at the thought of rape being belittled, or not taken seriously, especially if that person has had to endure being raped.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to Daddysredhead)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 5:25:39 PM   
zephyrkajira


Posts: 238
Joined: 8/15/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionAndi

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Just to clear something up..it wasn't the word "rape" I had a problem with. I have no problem when bdsm people say "when I get you home I'm gonna rape you".

I had a problem with the thought of "I now know what rape feels like". It's the "feels like" part. You have absolutely no idea. You have an idea what "rapePLAY" feels like. You have a feeling of what being taken feels like. You have an idea of what rough, passionate sex feels like.

By saying you know what rape feels like you're denigrating those who have been raped. It's like when people say to someone who's been hurt, "I know how you feel"...eerr..unless you've been in the same exact spot, you have no idea and really it's an insult to the person who is hurting.

I don't know if that helps to clear up anything or not but that's the point trying to get across by people here.

I cannot speak for Orion, But yes I see where you are coming from and you make a valid point!
But.
It was clear that he was talking about "rape" and not the real horrific rape some woman/men have been so unfortunate to have endured.

For all.
So from that by him talking about "rape" As in taken roughly/ forced and concentual ect ect ( as we have already discussed) The "I now know what rape feels like" meant " I know what the taken roughly/forced and consentual "rape" feels like"... " now i know what it feels like for her when I do this to her" In a sex play manner.

Basically the only fault that was made in his post was infact the punctuation in that sentance. instead of saying "rape" he said rape. And the "felt Like she WAS really raping me" meaning it wasnt just "she got on top and f*cked me"......... he couldnt explain the feeling.

Pretty amazing how just a silly mistake of punctuation make such a wrong turn on a sentance.

But it WAS clear that he infact was not talking about real rape. Never would he condone such an act..

He started the thread with "rape".

All I am saying on this. Orion is a very humble, funny, intelligent, gentleman. And I am a lucky woman to have him my life.


Andi.




Greetings andi,

The problem is that while you know your Master well....we don't. So all we have to go on is what he writes. So what seems like a small insignificant omission is actually a huge one which could have been avoided by reading over what he had written before posting. Yes he started out using "rape" instead of rape but what was posted was a statement that he now knew what it felt like to be raped.  What he (or anyone else) meant to write is of no consequence if that isn't what comes through because we don't know him and have no way of knowing what he meant.

No it wasn't clear he wasn't talking about real rape - not in that sentence anyway, if it had been people would not be reacting this way. So clearly there was a problem with the way he communicated this.  You may dismiss this as a misunderstanding due to "a silly mistake of punctuation" but the inclusion of the quote marks around the word rape would have made a huge difference so perhaps that is an unfortunate choice of words as well.

Furthermore, looking back and rereading the OP it wasn't the only time he forgot the quote marks around the word rape, zephyr counted 3 in total which makes her wonder if leaving off the quotes was a "silly omission" or whether he DID mean what he said and rape was the only word intense enough to describe the experience and he is retracting it because of the reaction. zephyr cannot say for sure of course having never met either of you, it's just that once is a mistake...3 times? Well that's harder to believe.

zephyr can understand that the experience was a great one....she isn't disputing that, but maybe it would be a good idea to think twice, three times on the wording before posting something?

be well....

zephyr


(in reply to OrionAndi)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 5:27:22 PM   
OrionAndi


Posts: 73
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionAndi

Also to add, what many of you didnt notice is that there is a large element of humour in his post which was not picked up because he is a new poster.. If his post wasnt so wrongly interpretted you would have seen that. So it could have been quite a fun interesting little thread. but hayho.

And please dont wrongly interpret that by saying " So he thinks rape is funny".

Thank you so much to those who did undertand and give light on the point of the thread. Mucho appriciated



I agree, its time to lighten up.

pinning your man down and having your wicked way with him is so hot.
About a year back we were at a party in a poly household and had our fem sub with us. Us two women woke up before him in the morning and decided to get the rest of the women in and tie him up. As far as I can remember there was five of us that suddenly pounced on him, tied him to the bed post and stood back whilst I took my own satisfaction!

The best part of it was when I had finished we all left him tied to the bed and went and made ourselves coffee. When we walked back into the bedroom our sub was taking advantage of the still tied up Stephen!
I think thats a morning he remembers fondly..... I certainly do.

gawd who wouldn't remember that.. and fondly! wow, what an experience!!!

Its funny though, I didnt  actually realize the effect it had on him until he recently started talking about it again, This actually happened a few months back!lol his reaction said it all really though to a point where I thought "he must be faking this!!!" This is why I laughed... It pretty much gave a me a shock factor too. *cracks up again*
Pretty amazing how the tables can be turned so quickly! EEek

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 5:34:14 PM   
OrionAndi


Posts: 73
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline 		This really is going round in circles now.

We understand the point made.

Ive had enough.

Andi.

(in reply to OrionAndi)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 5:40:36 PM   
pyroaquatic


Posts: 1535
Joined: 12/4/2006
From: Pyroaquatica
Status: offline 		Welcome to the WORLD OF Tomorrow!

Ninja chicks are hawt.

Being "TAKEN" is hawt.

Being "TAKEN" by a Ninja chick is death by orgasm.

Lighten up people! Enjoy the sunshine for you may never know when we will see it again.


_____________________________

You are what your deep, driving desire is.
As your desire is, so is your will.
As your will is, so is your deed.
As your deed is, so is your destiny.
-Brihadaranyaka Upanishad IV.4.5

(in reply to OrionAndi)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 6:54:35 PM   
Sunnyfey


Posts: 1436
Joined: 9/21/2007
From: OK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pyroaquatic


Ninja chicks are hawt.

Being "TAKEN" is hawt.

Being "TAKEN" by a Ninja chick is death by orgasm.




Yeah, have to speak up for the switch Ladies here...being a Ninja girl who can so do the taking, but being taken instead...death by orgasm


_____________________________

Resident Hell Cat



(in reply to pyroaquatic)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/19/2009 8:36:36 PM   
SomethingCatchy


Posts: 796
Joined: 7/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey

quote:

ORIGINAL: pyroaquatic


Ninja chicks are hawt.

Being "TAKEN" is hawt.

Being "TAKEN" by a Ninja chick is death by orgasm.




Yeah, have to speak up for the switch Ladies here...being a Ninja girl who can so do the taking, but being taken instead...death by orgasm



Quite possibly the most intelligent thing I've read on this entire, four page post.


_____________________________

I believe in Invisible Pink Unicorns

Everyone is gay for Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

(in reply to Sunnyfey)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Getting "raped" - 9/20/2009 6:53:45 AM   
zephyrkajira


Posts: 238
Joined: 8/15/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey

Yeah, have to speak up for the switch Ladies here...being a Ninja girl who can so do the taking, but being taken instead...death by orgasm



Greetings Sunnyfey,

"death by orgasm".....and there's a problem here? zephyr can think of worse ways to die *grins*

she wishes you well,

zephyr

(in reply to Sunnyfey)
Profile   Post #: 78
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