quote:

ORIGINAL: TPEOwner


Forgive me for invoking the grammar police, but it's relavent to your question. There is no such thing as "a domme". Even accepting that "domme" is accepted in the community as an abreviateion of dominant when applied to a female, "dominant" is an adjective. So "a domme" is really doubly abreviated for "dominant woman". Since to the best of my knowledge there is no medical study suggesting that you can be too heavy to be a woman, we can then focus on weight as a determining factor in having a dominant personality. Even then though, there is a difference between having a dominant personality, and desiring to take the dominant role in your play or relationships. I know of many women with dominant personalites who prefer the submissive role in their relationships. I also know of many who consider themselves to be "a domme" who are as dominant as a houseplant. Your question therefore, can be taken two ways. "Does size limit someone from having a dominant personality?", or "does size limit someone from taking the dominant role in a relationship or play".

It is my experience in this wonderful internet driven "BDSM community" that the terms dominant and submissive mean virtually" (no pun intended) nothing. Everyone defines those terms differently, and thus they are essentially useless for anything other than a starting point. That being the case, what anyone else thinks you are or aren't should be totally irrelevant to you. If you can find somone who you wish to take the dominant role with, and who wishes to take the submissive role with you, then you can both live happily ever after, or at least until the next day when they decide you aren't a "real domme", or you decide they aren't a "real subbie", and the search begins again.

And as a couple of parting notes, toys don't make you dominant, no matter how many bags you have of them. If "most seem great on here" to you, then you have either not been here very long, you aren't very observent, or you have very low standards. This site is a cesspool of liars, game players and emotionally broken people. Out in the real world, only castlerealm can compete with collarme for being the most derided and loathed bdsm website. And frankly, the real world bdsm community aint so great either.

Happy hunting.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissCake

quote:

ORIGINAL: misstressnew

is there a size limit to being a domme?

the reason i ask is that i have received a message from a guy stating im too fat and to give up now

There is no size limit to being a dom, just like there is no stupid or rude limit to being a sub (in ref to this guy in particular).

I use my size as a tool in play.  Your personality, attitude, and serious mean streak are going to be the qualities that matter most.  If you suffer lack of confidence because of your size, work to overcome it - learn how to dress well for the size you are, accentuate what is beautiful and powerful about you.

As to expensive equipment:  think hardware stores, houseware and storage stores, discount stores...  (Home Depot, Container Store, Big Lots, Target, 99 Cent Store and Dollar Tree, Toys R Us, Teacher Supply.)

Most of the equipment in my extensive collection was very inexpensive.

quote:

ORIGINAL: TPEOwner

Forgive me for invoking the grammar police, but it's relavent to your question. There is no such thing as "a domme". Even accepting that "domme" is accepted in the community as an abreviateion of dominant when applied to a female, "dominant" is an adjective. So "a domme" is really doubly abreviated for "dominant woman". Since to the best of my knowledge there is no medical study suggesting that you can be too heavy to be a woman, we can then focus on weight as a determining factor in having a dominant personality. Even then though, there is a difference between having a dominant personality, and desiring to take the dominant role in your play or relationships. I know of many women with dominant personalites who prefer the submissive role in their relationships. I also know of many who consider themselves to be "a domme" who are as dominant as a houseplant. Your question therefore, can be taken two ways. "Does size limit someone from having a dominant personality?", or "does size limit someone from taking the dominant role in a relationship or play".

It is my experience in this wonderful internet driven "BDSM community" that the terms dominant and submissive mean virtually" (no pun intended) nothing. Everyone defines those terms differently, and thus they are essentially useless for anything other than a starting point. That being the case, what anyone else thinks you are or aren't should be totally irrelevant to you. If you can find somone who you wish to take the dominant role with, and who wishes to take the submissive role with you, then you can both live happily ever after, or at least until the next day when they decide you aren't a "real domme", or you decide they aren't a "real subbie", and the search begins again.

And as a couple of parting notes, toys don't make you dominant, no matter how many bags you have of them. If "most seem great on here" to you, then you have either not been here very long, you aren't very observent, or you have very low standards. This site is a cesspool of liars, game players and emotionally broken people. Out in the real world, only castlerealm can compete with collarme for being the most derided and loathed bdsm website. And frankly, the real world bdsm community aint so great either.

Happy hunting.

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Yeah, I'm too fat to change.

Ron

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

A wise woman would have learned some sort of lesson about that, after 28,252 posts.

Just saying...............

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoDolphins

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse



Yeah, well welcome to the world of the internet where putzes feel they can say whatever they want behind the armour of their computer screen.

Oh I know that.  It's amazing the things people will say to you on here.  I really can't believe most of it would be said in a face-to-face conversation. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: looking4princess

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissCake

quote:

ORIGINAL: misstressnew

is there a size limit to being a domme?

the reason i ask is that i have received a message from a guy stating im too fat and to give up now

There is no size limit to being a dom, just like there is no stupid or rude limit to being a sub (in ref to this guy in particular).

I use my size as a tool in play.  Your personality, attitude, and serious mean streak are going to be the qualities that matter most.  If you suffer lack of confidence because of your size, work to overcome it - learn how to dress well for the size you are, accentuate what is beautiful and powerful about you.

As to expensive equipment:  think hardware stores, houseware and storage stores, discount stores...  (Home Depot, Container Store, Big Lots, Target, 99 Cent Store and Dollar Tree, Toys R Us, Teacher Supply.)

Most of the equipment in my extensive collection was very inexpensive.

Oh please, may i second that about the equipment. Miss Cake is so correct. And let me add it is not the hardware that is so important but often the HARD attitude (pun intended)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TPEOwner

And as a couple of parting notes, toys don't make you dominant, no matter how many bags you have of them. If "most seem great on here" to you, then you have either not been here very long, you aren't very observent, or you have very low standards. This site is a cesspool of liars, game players and emotionally broken people. Out in the real world, only castlerealm can compete with collarme for being the most derided and loathed bdsm website. And frankly, the real world bdsm community aint so great either.

Happy hunting.

quote:

ORIGINAL: misstressnew
more shopping for kit now me thinks

quote:

ORIGINAL: TPEOwner