Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (Full Version)

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looking4princess -> Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 9:03:46 AM)

I found this ad on CM from a Femdomme, actually a Findomme:

I specialize in WALLET-RAPING, ACCOUNT-DRAINING, and MONEY-SIPHONING you LOSERs! I will use, abuse, humiliate, and bring you SORRY FUCKS to your knees BEGGING FOR MORE!!

From curiosity i reviewed her profile and found that one of her Interests included christianity. I wrote to her to inquire if she did not see a disconnect between her religion and her contemptuous attitude toward others. I wondered what would jesus think? One more message exchange and the lady blocked me. LOL!

I realize i have cited an extreme contradiction with this lady’s(?) Profile. I also realize that love not contempt is a staple ingredient of most D/s relationships. But it got me to wondering if Christians and/or Jews and/or Muslims wrestled with any conflicts between their religious precepts and their BDSM desires and fantasies. I will tell you up front that i am an extreme agnostic on the issue of god and religion, so i do not harbor any conflicts regarding my “perv” persona.

I would welcome your observations.




mnottertail -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 9:15:21 AM)

Well, maybe she had that 'Whore of Babylon' thing going on, or was an old testament religion kinda person, and wasn't buying into the sermon on the mount.


Fuck it. It's all good. IT'S ALL GOOD.

Ron




worthlesstrash -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 9:20:19 AM)

I am a Christian and I have had conflicting feelings at times. This came up the other day with my M, who is also my husband. He has talked about wanting to see me with another woman, he has always wanted that. When he and I got together I was coming out of a relationship with a woman, so I think he assumed I would eventually change my mind. It was even in our contract that it would not be required and if it were something I wanted to do, I would search her out and initiate the meeting.

When he brought this up again the other day..I told him that although I loved him very much, I wasn't going to do this. I told him that what we did between us, I considered in our marriage bed and sacred...in other words I think that anything we do together is okay, so I even opened up my limits I had before such as watersports. I told him though that as much as he meant to me, I wasn't going to sin in order to make him happy or pleased because it would be me that paid the price in the end, not him. I feel like I let him down with this and it's very, very hard for me. I can't however bend my convictions for someone else....in the end, there would be nothing "real" about me.

I hope he now understands, but I doubt that will be the last time it's brought up...it's a long time fantasy and I suspect it always will be.

There are still times I wonder if what we do is okay, but I don't really feel any conviction about it like I do the other. I actually wrote a friend on here about it the other day..she and I are of the same faith, and I wondered how she dealt with it. I don't think this struggle is unique, and it's always good to know one is not alone.




LaTigresse -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 9:20:39 AM)

Actually, even though I am about as far from religious a person as you can find, I am a weird, little zen budhhism, my own little happy spiritual place, kinda woman.

That being said, I believe in embracing ALL facets of my personality. Even the evil, I'd rather stomp your balls into the ground than look at them, then make you lick my boots clean because they touched your balls, and THEN because I never wanted to see them in the first place I will take that wallet for the trouble, thank you very much....kinda woman that lurks inside.

It's stuff that lives in all of us and to tamp it down and ignore it, well that kind of concerns me more than accepting it, and maintaining control of it. I would much rather know a person that acknowledges that aspect of their personality, embraces it, and is honest about it.

But that's just me.




Lockit -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 9:48:07 AM)

Looking... you sure bring up some challenging things! lol Having gotten a couple emails from you, I know! hehe With the many emails we can get we can sometimes see the bad side or assume there is a bad side and not see what a person is actually saying sometimes. ([sm=wave.gif]me, me, me!) So maybe that is what got the block... but also, people just don't want to see any fault in themselves and don't wish to be examined or questioned.

I don't care what a person's creed is, but in my personal life, I do expect them to live true to their creed. Many were raised with some form of christian belief. They will not actually live it or practice it, but have a fear of denying it. They can think that claiming christianity as true isn't denying the truth which will save them, which isn't the creed at all. They think that because they don't deny Christ and have said that prayer of acceptance and forgiveness, that whatever they do is okay, they are forgiven and safe. That too isn't the way that works according to the creed.

I have known people who have struggled with their belief and bdsm. If they can't find peace in it, they will sway back and forth, in and out of both belief and bdsm. Personally, if they have a strong foundation and peace about it, I can handle it... but that wishy washy, guilt ridden, shame and struggle is far more than I am willing to take on in a partner.




porcelaine -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 9:48:18 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: looking4princess

I realize i have cited an extreme contradiction with this lady’s(?) Profile. I also realize that love not contempt is a staple ingredient of most D/s relationships. But it got me to wondering if Christians and/or Jews and/or Muslims wrestled with any conflicts between their religious precepts and their BDSM desires and fantasies. I will tell you up front that i am an extreme agnostic on the issue of god and religion, so i do not harbor any conflicts regarding my “perv” persona.

I would welcome your observations.


not anymore. in the past i did and as the child of a minister i'd gather i've had a lot of things poured into my head that i took the liberty of expunging. as extreme as her example is, i find that many have similar things lurking around in their mind. they elect to repress them in the name of their religion or because they feel it is the right thing to do. their faith is put in its place and that is where they channel the energies and frustrations instead. whether this truly fills the void and promotes happiness is a mystery. i've met some very unhappy rabid religious types.

i've found peace with it all and can happily relate to G-d and still be comfortable with who i am and what i enjoy. i know there are compromises i may never make, and i take man's interpretation of the divine very loosely and will not allow them to dictate how i should live. since i've had the privilege of seeing clergy from various paths behind closed doors it may have colored my views to some extent. we're all people, regardless if you're in the pew or the pulpit. we each have things lurking inside that we never utter. whether we choose to acknowledge them or pretend they never exist is personal.

there are certain Jewish beliefs that may not coincide with my sexual practices. whether i will sacrifice them or not is something i haven't truly said yay or nay to. at present i'm leaning towards no and simply accept that this is who i am. my commitment to living a balanced authentic life exceeds my need to do things by the book. i also found when i attempted to do so in the past i became frustrated and often beat myself up when i fell short. i don't see the positive benefits of such and i've abandoned that line of thinking. it would seem that the purpose of faith and belief in something higher than ourselves is for our betterment, not self destruction. as such, i find harmony in being both Jewish and a slave with decidedly twisted fetishes. i might as well make the most of my time. i only get one trip.

porcelaine




mnottertail -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 9:55:30 AM)

quote:

i've found peace with it all and can happily relate to G-d


even anglicized will not spell *adoni*

*inserts into chips*

Carry on,

Ron




MissCake -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 10:00:14 AM)

I have been lucky enough to become part of a Christian denomination which does not subscribe to the same old paradigm of sin and redemption.  With me, there are no conflicts because the type of Christianity I practice just doesn't have the same old list of what is sinful and immoral.

For anyone interested, google "Process Theology"




porcelaine -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 10:00:16 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

quote:

i've found peace with it all and can happily relate to G-d


even anglicized will not spell *adoni*

*inserts into chips*

Carry on,

Ron


and here i was hoping we'd discuss that whore of babylon comment. *le sigh*

porcelaine




mnottertail -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 10:01:29 AM)

you may wax long and exceedingly eloquently upon that subject, if you wish.

R




porcelaine -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 10:17:50 AM)

i'd rather have you marinating on my words instead. [;)]

porcelaine




DVsFox -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 10:30:54 AM)

My Owner and I are both Christian.  We attend services as regularly as work/school will allow.  There is no religious conflict with anything that we do.

DV's Fox




DesFIP -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 10:46:54 AM)

I have no conflict with my religion. There's a line somewhere in the Torah that roughly translates to "don't do unnatural things". What there isn't, is a definition of what is unnatural. Being a Reconstructionist Jew, we consider unnatural to not being true to yourself. Which means if a lesbian, don't date men to try to keep it hidden. It's not fair to the man btw.

As such I consider what we do is natural. We don't take pleasure in harming anyone, we care for each other very much, we try to raise ethical children. And that's a lot more important than whether or not we drag out some ropes at bedtime.




Acer49 -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 12:40:37 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: looking4princess

I found this ad on CM from a Femdomme, actually a Findomme:

I specialize in WALLET-RAPING, ACCOUNT-DRAINING, and MONEY-SIPHONING you LOSERs! I will use, abuse, humiliate, and bring you SORRY FUCKS to your knees BEGGING FOR MORE!!

From curiosity i reviewed her profile and found that one of her Interests included christianity. I wrote to her to inquire if she did not see a disconnect between her religion and her contemptuous attitude toward others. I wondered what would jesus think? One more message exchange and the lady blocked me. LOL!

I realize i have cited an extreme contradiction with this lady’s(?) Profile. I also realize that love not contempt is a staple ingredient of most D/s relationships. But it got me to wondering if Christians and/or Jews and/or Muslims wrestled with any conflicts between their religious precepts and their BDSM desires and fantasies. I will tell you up front that i am an extreme agnostic on the issue of god and religion, so i do not harbor any conflicts regarding my “perv” persona.

I would welcome your observations.


quote:

agnostic


I will only speak for myself when I say the lifestyle does not cause me any conflicts with my beliefs




Lessthancharmed -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 12:50:26 PM)

As a Christian I don't really find there to be any religious conflict with marital, Bible-based, M/f relationships.  In fact, the Bible is very clear that women should be obedient to their husbands in the same way the church should be obedient to Christ, and points out how Sarah obeyed Abraham and called him "Lord."  There are no specific prohibitions placed on sex acts between a man and his wife in the Bible itself, however many conservative churchy types will forbid oral sex with rationales like "I wasn't born standing on my head," and I'm sure they'd have plenty to say against many BDSM activities.  For those trying to be a part of a specific church, it could be awkward if they were open about the nature of their relationship, but for those who simply believe in the Bible without trying to conform to the views of any particular denomination, I think it can be a valid lifestyle for both Jews and Christians.  It would be easy to cross the line into the forbidden, though, if you were hanging around a lifestyle-oriented crowd.




looking4princess -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 1:10:58 PM)

My first thought in writing was about self-conflict and some have expressed interesting responses to that. Others have expanded the idea into conflict between partners, which is also very important. Thank you.

I would love to hear more about the Whore of Babylon thingy but wasn't that the Revelation of John referring to evil Rome? Don't wish to get into that here, but i'd be grateful if someone would imagine a single Lady as WOB and tell us her story for fun *grins*

But i am puzzled by the remarks of DV's Fox :

quote:

My Owner and I are both Christian. We attend services as regularly as work/school will allow. There is no religious conflict with anything that we do.


I don't mean to be provocative here (well, i fib) but may i ask if there is no conflict because you do nothing untowards or is there no conflict because Christianity permits wiitud? It seems to me that the Christian precept of equality before God would preclude the Owner/property relationship you are in, and which i find mostly delicious. I just wonder how you reconcile the two.

And if i am being too nosey just ignore me. lmao. It won't be the first or last time i have been ignored. Just trying to stoke the embers here Fox.




Lockit -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 1:11:32 PM)

If someone can be influenced by the crowd they hang around with... then they aren't real strong in living their creed. Testing, testing... 1, 2, 3... If one is going by the bible... they are to be on the highways and byways and mixing with other's to let their light shine.

There are many who will claim that the wife is to be obediant to the husband... but there are some things they often forget! lol Like the husband is to love her and care for her like Christ does the church. There were a number of female leaders in the church and throughout the bible... one can be a leader and still be within the guidelines of certain structure in the bible. But... some of what is written is society and the time... so one must understand that it was something said pertaining to society and how things were viewed and also understand how female leaders did fit into things.

Plus... getting into the greek and hebrew words... how they are intended and such, makes some real interesting changes! lol

Like the greek word for edification... how it is used by most in modern chruches and such means or is taken to mean... being happy with, proud of and showing reason that god is happy with them... when really it means in most ways it is used, as a correction or god showing them they need correction.




Lockit -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 1:13:47 PM)

There is scripture that states that the marrital bed cannot be defiled as it is sanctioned by marriage. If one is living the love... respect and all that comes with the rest of scripture... what a couple do sexually is not wrong.




MmeRegineSybille -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 1:16:18 PM)

I am not a christian and do not believe in the bible........I have no problem using and abusing men at all!..........in My world, it is their rightful place, at a Woman's feet.




hlen5 -> RE: Religious conflict with bdsm relationships or fantasies. (9/23/2009 1:19:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

If someone can be influenced by the crowd they hang around with... then they aren't real strong in living their creed. Testing, testing... 1, 2, 3... If one is going by the bible... they are to be on the highways and byways and mixing with other's to let their light shine.

There are many who will claim that the wife is to be obediant to the husband... but there are some things they often forget! lol Like the husband is to love her and care for her like Christ does the church. There were a number of female leaders in the church and throughout the bible... one can be a leader and still be within the guidelines of certain structure in the bible. But... some of what is written is society and the time... so one must understand that it was something said pertaining to society and how things were viewed and also understand how female leaders did fit into things.

Plus... getting into the greek and hebrew words... how they are intended and such, makes some real interesting changes! lol

Like the greek word for edification... how it is used by most in modern chruches and such means or is taken to mean... being happy with, proud of and showing reason that god is happy with them... when really it means in most ways it is used, as a correction or god showing them they need correction.

Go Lockit! Go Lockit!![sm=yourock.gif] 




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