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RE: Call him Master? - 9/25/2009 3:51:03 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		Always amuses Me when I see the "He's mine!" from a girl.... not saying it is wrong, many are D/s rather than M/s and the Dynamic is different. My girl might get irritated at someone calling Me 'Master' but because she considers it disrespectful and presumptuous of them, she would keep her reaction to herself however because she doesn't Own Me and if it bothers Me then I deal with it... it isn't her place to do so.

Only one girl apart from My Own that I accept it from... that is because that was the form of address demanded by her old Master toward ALL Dominants, I've known her a long time and now, though she is no longer under those rules (And doesn't apply it in all cases anymore) what started as 'just because it was the rule she was under'... became a genuine show of the respect she felt and it has continued long after the 'rule' has passed.

Some Gorean girls I will accept "Master Raven" (Not simply 'Master') as that is part of their protocol... not the girls choice/fault

Anyone else, if they feel the need to use a title then 'Sir' is sufficient.... other than that My name is Raven!


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RE: Call him Master? - 9/25/2009 3:53:54 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

Did another Sub/slave who does not belong to you Master call him Master? If so did it bother you? Why or why not?
It has never happened, but i am pretty sure it would not bother me too much...just cause a bit of an eyeroll. 

Turn it to a vanilla scenario...You have a name for your partner, other than his Christian name, which is deeply personal to you ('Snookums', perhaps?). Someone else calling him that is a social blunder.


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RE: Call him Master? - 9/25/2009 5:46:04 AM   
kallisto


Posts: 1185
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Did another Sub/slave who does not belong to you Master call him Master? If so did it bother you? Why or why not?
It has never happened, but i am pretty sure it would not bother me too much...just cause a bit of an eyeroll. 

Turn it to a vanilla scenario...You have a name for your partner, other than his Christian name, which is deeply personal to you ('Snookums', perhaps?). Someone else calling him that is a social blunder.



I'm like sirsholly.   I think it would make me raise my eyebrows and roll my eyes.   I wouldn't make a big deal about it.   I would probably mention it to him ..that it made me a bit uncomfortable and get his take on it.  I wouldn't want to make it a mountain if it was just a little hill.

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Call him Master? - 9/25/2009 11:11:38 AM   
Golden614


Posts: 19
Joined: 6/21/2008
Status: offline 		I think it would depend a lot more on the situation, the person calling him "Master" and the context in which the honorific was used. I am not overly jealous, but I have my moments. I suppose I'm more sub than slave (depending on your definition), in that I still feel I have every right to expect respect from other people. If someone were to cross a boundary, I would let them know politely that i didn't appreciate it and move on. Master has always allowed me my autonomy, which is yet another reason why I am so devoted to him.

As far as specifying "my" Master, I don't think this denotes ownership in any way, I use it as a term of endearment. It makes me happy to express how important and unique he is to me. Plus, as was discussed in another thread, everyone says thing like "MY mother" or "MY uncle." No one thinks you own your mother or uncle, so why is it different when I use it when speaking about someone who is in fact my master?

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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Call him Master? - 9/25/2009 11:18:46 AM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunnyfey
quote:

ORIGINAL: DavanKael
I would be peeved; what's mine is mine. 
Davan

Ditto. Unless shes in my poly family. But even then I'd prefer it if she called him something besides Akri (which is what I call NZ, basically means the same thing as Master someone else ever called him that I'd go off the deep end).


In contemplation of poly scenarios, I agree that terms of endearment/commitment between partners is cool but I also feel the same as do you: different partners can come up with novel terms rather than simply using the same term or if, for example, in a male Dominant scenario, he prefers his partners to call him Master, perhaps each having an additional term for the other would work. 
I believe that people wish to feel unique, valued, and not-optional and that this hearkens to that.  I generally have a preference for hierarchical poly (Unless I were in a MMF situation, in which case, I'd be okay with multiple primaries) so distinction is particularly important to me. 
  Davan

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RE: Call him Master? - 9/25/2009 11:48:29 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

Always amuses Me when I see the "He's mine!" from a girl.... not saying it is wrong, many are D/s rather than M/s and the Dynamic is different. My girl might get irritated at someone calling Me 'Master' but because she considers it disrespectful and presumptuous of them, she would keep her reaction to herself however because she doesn't Own Me and if it bothers Me then I deal with it... it isn't her place to do so.

Only one girl apart from My Own that I accept it from... that is because that was the form of address demanded by her old Master toward ALL Dominants, I've known her a long time and now, though she is no longer under those rules (And doesn't apply it in all cases anymore) what started as 'just because it was the rule she was under'... became a genuine show of the respect she felt and it has continued long after the 'rule' has passed.

Some Gorean girls I will accept "Master Raven" (Not simply 'Master') as that is part of their protocol... not the girls choice/fault

Anyone else, if they feel the need to use a title then 'Sir' is sufficient.... other than that My name is Raven!



exactly Master Raven

on the boards... all Dominant men tend to be "Master ____"... off line, if i know they are gorean, then its just Master, until he tells me differently. Its not meant to be disrespectful, its just how i was trained. If a Man or Woman has an issue with me addressing them in that fashion, i have no doubt they will inform me and the tile or honorific will change to suit their desire. until i know what they prefer, i fall back onto my training. What another girl may like, or may not like, doesnt matter.

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RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Call him Master? - 9/25/2009 12:13:13 PM   
slaveToKnight


Posts: 100
Joined: 8/2/2009
Status: offline 		I call him Master and yes it really does bother me when someone else calls him that. It is something I earned and I really get upset when others call him that. Master says others may call him Sir. I can't help but want to rip a body part off someone who he does not own calling him Master.

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Call him Master? - 9/30/2009 7:59:59 PM   
Redoubt


Posts: 185
Joined: 8/11/2007
Status: offline 		Interesting topic.

Why would you not feel pride that the man who owns you is respected enough by others that they show him a great deal of respect by referring to him as "master".

To me it just shows that you have a good man, a title is just a title, unless he shows otherwise that says to me that he inspires other submissives to want him to know they have respect for him.

If you get that hung up on a mode of address, I can only imagine what would happen if she was to look at him longingly.... perhaps you need to feel more secure in his embrace, yes?

Now, if he responded by paying her attention and ignoring you, then that is something to worry about... but that wasn't the question.

(in reply to slaveToKnight)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Call him Master? - 10/1/2009 7:53:34 AM   
TheGaggingWh0re


Posts: 222
Joined: 1/19/2006
Status: offline 		This is a funny topic! I'm seeing soo many different opinions.

I do not think I would be bothered by a title. To me, it's a word, but the feelings behind it are what matters most. If I had a sub friend who JUST met him...I doubt there would be strong feelings behind the word. If we knew each other for a while and we were all attracted to one another, well...I don't think I would mind that much at all, either.

Essentially, my owner is the one who decides what he likes and does not like. I'm afraid in my type of relationship I have no say over the matter and I'm quite content with that.

ALSO...communication is key. I think I would normally call someone elses's owner 'Sir' or 'Miss'/'Ma'am' (I myself do not like calling anyone else Master or Mistress and will readily verbalize this), but I would not do so without voicing my comfort level and listening to theirs.

I think most of these things are soft-hearted mistakes. I think, overall, people do not INTEND to insult one another with these titles, so while it is too easy to fly off the handle I think a proper and kind correction is much healthier for any relationship (and healthier for your image so you don't look absolutely absurd).

(in reply to Lashra)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Call him Master? - 10/1/2009 10:06:41 AM   
spookyfe


Posts: 74
Status: offline 		master said i wasnt to call him master till i felt he was my master it took about 3 months for me to use it all the time then he gave me permission to use it.  i dont like to hear others call him master as they havent earned the right to.  i never call another dominant master if i know they are or instructed to i will use sir .  he prefers others not to call him master but sir 

(in reply to TheGaggingWh0re)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Call him Master? - 10/1/2009 10:12:38 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline 		earned the right to call him Master? to me, thats unusual. for some of us, the tilte Master is just a sign of respect. there is no seeking of ownership, no expectations that go along with the title.. no trying to worm our way into his collar as so many seem to think.

its simply respect. and when he, or she, decides to tell me they dont like that form of respect, they prefer another, then its whatever they chose, Ma'am, Sir, Cracker, ect... but.. its all up to the D type to express their wishes. even as a submissive, its not up to you.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to spookyfe)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Call him Master? - 10/1/2009 10:44:12 AM   
spookyfe


Posts: 74
Status: offline 		i worded the reply wrongly.  this was once i was collared.   it was all about respect.  but he feels that it is not an automatic right to be called master that anyone can be called master out of respect but to feel the respect to call him it was important.

(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Call him Master? - 10/1/2009 11:20:06 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

Always amuses Me when I see the "He's mine!" from a girl.... not saying it is wrong, many are D/s rather than M/s and the Dynamic is different. My girl might get irritated at someone calling Me 'Master' but because she considers it disrespectful and presumptuous of them, she would keep her reaction to herself however because she doesn't Own Me and if it bothers Me then I deal with it... it isn't her place to do so.

Only one girl apart from My Own that I accept it from... that is because that was the form of address demanded by her old Master toward ALL Dominants, I've known her a long time and now, though she is no longer under those rules (And doesn't apply it in all cases anymore) what started as 'just because it was the rule she was under'... became a genuine show of the respect she felt and it has continued long after the 'rule' has passed.

Some Gorean girls I will accept "Master Raven" (Not simply 'Master') as that is part of their protocol... not the girls choice/fault

Anyone else, if they feel the need to use a title then 'Sir' is sufficient.... other than that My name is Raven!


OKOK OK,I have to say this lol.

I am not a kajiira yet, I have always called you Master Raven...

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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Call him Master? - 10/1/2009 11:24:19 AM   
tammystarm


Posts: 3045
Joined: 7/26/2006
Status: offline 		This is where Master and i differ. He believes that it is a respect issue and that i should address every other male Dom, by Sir etc. i hate it, but i will as this is what He wants. But i see it as i am giving Him the ultimate respect by calling Him Master.  so on and on it goes, He "wins" of course and i like it that He wins, but......

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Call him Master? - 10/1/2009 11:49:16 AM   
beltainefaerie


Posts: 610
Joined: 4/15/2006
Status: offline 		I seems crazy to me that people would be bothered by someone else referring to them or their Mistress/Master/Sir/Daddy/Goddess/High Lord whatever as 'sir' or 'ma'am' as those are merely polite forms of address.  And unless there are several other Sirs in the room, I think 'my Sir' is a little odd, but to each there own.  I generally call people by whatever name I have been introduced to them as.  I don't call my best friend's dom 'Daddy' as he isn't mine.  She doesn't call my Master 'Master' as he isn't hers. Usually a polite introduction can avoid a whole range of impolite behavior.  Hi, this is my Master, Jon. Master, this is Susan.  And as they are shaking hands, he can say to Susan, please call me Jon.   Problem solved, embarrassment avoided.

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RE: Call him Master? - 10/1/2009 5:11:35 PM   
antipode


Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline
quote:

If so did it bother you? Why or why not?


It does not bother me that the sky is blue. Don't know why it doesn't bother me though.

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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Call him Master? - 10/1/2009 5:19:54 PM   
zephyrkajira


Posts: 238
Joined: 8/15/2009
Status: offline 		I've been known to call Dominant men Master (it's required of Gorean slaves) and it has nothing to do with ownership, it's simply a term of respect. Similarly other slaves have called my owner Master and it has never bothered me in the least. I know that they are simply showing respect and that they aren't laying claim to him. No biggie....

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Call him Master? - 10/1/2009 11:30:45 PM   
gary251


Posts: 4
Joined: 7/17/2009
Status: offline 		Im from NC, How do I find a slave/sub in NC......Got any ideas. Missing my sub!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gary Peterson

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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Call him Master? - 10/2/2009 7:13:25 AM   
andreaC


Posts: 195
Joined: 10/15/2006
Status: offline 		I have friends that are slave and have their Masters, but they always call my Master by his first name.  I dont think i would like if they were to call my Master, Master, and like you said, he is MY Master :)  

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RE: Call him Master? - 10/4/2009 2:18:00 AM   
KateyCaine


Posts: 274
Joined: 5/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: angelwithhonor

...this is my thought only, but i feel its wrong and disrespectful of another sub/slave calling a Sir "Master"...if they arent their sub/slave...i myself couldnt call a Dom Master if i wasnt His sub/slave..titles are just that but they are well earned,and should be respected as that.....kate



i agree with you - nicely said :)

k.

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Proud to be owned and cherished by Master Charles (Gauge)

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Profile   Post #: 40
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