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RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 3:13:24 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

We're pretty compatible overall in our morals and values so there's not much I can say I wouldn't do for Master. I wouldn't be with him if there was. Our morals and values would be incompatible.

Those things I choose as limits are there because they would physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually destroy me. They would go against everything I believe in and stand for.

(in reply to petmonkey)

Post #: 21

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 3:17:27 PM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth
most of the hookah smokers that this slave knows don't lean that way. they are more apt to envision a big orgy-noise filled peaceful love-in...and leave the paranoid violent freaked out delusions to the tweakers.

I stand corrected *laughs* So all along then I've mis-conceptualized this as a debate between the engineers and the poets when, in real life, it's a debate between the hookah smokers and the tweakers? Yeah, that makes a lot more sense.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Post #: 22

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 3:36:33 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth
most of the hookah smokers that this slave knows don't lean that way. they are more apt to envision a big orgy-noise filled peaceful love-in...and leave the paranoid violent freaked out delusions to the tweakers.

I stand corrected *laughs* So all along then I've mis-conceptualized this as a debate between the engineers and the poets when, in real life, it's a debate between the hookah smokers and the tweakers? Yeah, that makes a lot more sense.

not necessarily...it could very well be a debate between the poets and engineers is the best concept to imagine.

it's just that the Anslinger-esque comments are something we can all do without...unless, of course, your last name is Hearst. then it all makes perfect sense.

(in reply to leadership527)

Post #: 23

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 3:43:33 PM

tammystarm

Posts: 3045
Joined: 7/26/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

sorry, Jeff, this slave is going to have to disagree with your lame stereotype:

quote:

Did someone take a drag off the hookah before answering?

do you really believe that those who would "take a drag off the hookah" would be more willing to envision ridiculous violent dismemberings from horror flicks than those who don't?

most of the hookah smokers that this slave knows don't lean that way. they are more apt to envision a big orgy-noise filled peaceful love-in...and leave the paranoid violent freaked out delusions to the tweakers.

i loved that!! thank you!!!!

_____________________________

~~Queen of duct-tape~~
~~Emotionally delusional~~

~~somebody pour me my nebuitol and hand me my drink~~

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Post #: 24

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 4:31:12 PM

catize

Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline

I have concluded that discussions about limits annoy me because they focus on the few negatives (what someone will not, in some cases cannot do) rather than the many positives (all the things we do/are willing to do) for and with our dominant partners.

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to geomease)

Post #: 25

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 4:39:43 PM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: catize
I have concluded that discussions about limits annoy me because they focus on the few negatives (what someone will not, in some cases cannot do) rather than the many positives (all the things we do/are willing to do) for and with our dominant partners.

QFT: Like you I find little value in pondering all the various ways in which Carol and I might fail to please each other.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to catize)

Post #: 26

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 5:03:57 PM

lovingpet

Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

quote:

ORIGINAL: catize
I have concluded that discussions about limits annoy me because they focus on the few negatives (what someone will not, in some cases cannot do) rather than the many positives (all the things we do/are willing to do) for and with our dominant partners.

QFT: Like you I find little value in pondering all the various ways in which Carol and I might fail to please each other.

Yup. I'm not interested in dwelling on what I can't do. With my particular set of circumstances, I have to face those sometimes literally painful decisions often enough. I prefer to focus on what I can do and how greatly fulfilled we can make each other instead. It keeps me more healthy and sane that way.

lovingpet

(in reply to leadership527)

Post #: 27

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 6:32:40 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Besides most of this stuff is not absolute. If I have a sinus infection then a blow job is past uncomfortable for me simply because I can't breathe. But telling him I can't do it one day doesn't mean I'm not interested in pleasing him, it just means something came up.

Right now if he decided he would only talk in whispers and I would have to be sufficiently attentive to follow without asking for repetition is what is required, I would have to tell him no. I've got an ear infection and can't hear to begin with.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to lovingpet)

Post #: 28

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 6:49:21 PM

daddysprop247

Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
Status: offline

weird, i've never thought of limits as "can't dos" but rather as "won't dos." it goes without saying that we all have many limitations, things that are just physically or mentally impossible for us (lifting a car and calculating pi to the thousandth place will forever be beyond me). otoh i view limits as things that, if asked or demanded, one would refuse to do. there is nothing i would ever refuse my Master, therefore with him i have no limits.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 29

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 6:59:39 PM

RavenMuse

Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

prop hit the core of it as for how it works in THIS household. Can't is something I take on board.... if there is something the girl is physically unable to achieve then only an idiot is going to expect her to successfully comply.... Sometimes she will simply be told to do as much of it as she can do, oft that ends up being more than she thought but completion is not required to please Me, only 100% effort is needed.

Won't, doesn't happen in this household, she gave up her rights to refuse when she submitted to Me. she lives within My limits, she is safe from harm within them, she needs none of her own.

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to daddysprop247)

Post #: 30

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 7:38:08 PM

fadedshadow

Posts: 751
Joined: 4/27/2009
From: a place
Status: offline

i wouldn't want to do waterboarding

_____________________________

your living nightmare

(in reply to petmonkey)

Post #: 31

RE: What are your limits - 10/1/2009 8:01:38 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline

I'm not really all that submissive, so maybe my answer doesn't count, but yet I have no go area's, and they're mostly common sense things, like public play where it's not allowed, and I refuse to use products in ways they were never meant to use them and warn against doing so like putting mentholated rubs in the ass or the vagina, anything that will harm my health in un acceptible ways no matter how temporary, and well really there's more limits than I care to list, but the main ones protect my health and keep me from being jailed fined or getting a public record.

If they ask me something that is not a hard limit we'd discuss it and go from there, and if he asked something that was a hard limit, we;d have a problem because hard limits are no go area's and he'd know that before I ever became anything to him.

quote:

ORIGINAL: geomease

Just wondering to any of the more experienced subs out there, are there any limits to what you would do for master both in and out of the bedroom. Obviously you'd try to make your dom happy but are there any areas you just won't go, what would you do if your dom asked you to do something you're uncomfortable with?

(in reply to geomease)

Post #: 32

RE: What are your limits - 10/2/2009 9:27:15 AM

ponygirlthree

Posts: 16
Joined: 3/11/2009
Status: offline

i have no limits except thoese given to me by my owners. . our relationship/agreement is based on living the lifestyle to the fulllest in todays world and i have to trust them t not do me harm and look after my health. they have not let me down in 5 years

(in reply to petmonkey)

Post #: 33

RE: What are your limits - 10/2/2009 5:17:44 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

There's physical harm, but there's also mental and emotional. Those get described as won't do. I am physically capable of being suspended upside down, and probably the vertigo would subside within a week, it usually does. But I won't do it because for me that's just too uncomfortable. And I would find anyone who chose to do so morally reprehensible

I'm physically capable of being restrained and then having him put a duct tape gag on me. But I will have a panic attack. Will it subside eventually? Sure. But I'm not interested in anyone who would deliberately trigger one off. Again, I find that morally repugnant.

Now if he was a renowned rigger who did workshops of inverted suspension, then this limit would be important. For most people it isn't.

And like little wonder said, if our morals aren't compatible, then we aren't.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to ponygirlthree)

Post #: 34

RE: What are your limits - 10/2/2009 6:06:02 PM

catize

Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline

When it comes to emotional or mental harm, there are those who insist a submissive is saying “I won’t” when they really really ‘can’t’.
They discount mental or emotional limits because the harm is not visible like physical harm, but it is just as real, I would not want a dominant who is unable or unwilling to discern the less obvious damage.

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 35

RE: What are your limits - 10/2/2009 9:47:33 PM

Elisabella

Posts: 3939
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

OK, so once again we're back to "no limits" and TPE. My best answer is that there are two answers.

For the engineers among us:
Of course Carol has limits... zillions of them. There are endless things I could command her to do which would result in her removing her collar rather than obeying. Pretty much anything in a SAW movie for instance. The universe doesn't deal in absolutes.

For the poets among us:
Carol has no limits. I give her commands and she obeys them. She obeys them whether or not she likes them or approves of them. And how did scenes from horror movies ever get into a discussion about consensual relationships? Did someone take a drag off the hookah before answering?

There ya go... pick your own position. Both are correct.

This post is so awesome.

To answer the OP, I have quite a few limits. I'll list a few big ones - TPE 24/7 slavery, public or internet nudity, eating out of a dog bowl or drinking urine or anything weird like that in or near my mouth, cutting my hair short, submitting to another woman...there really are quite a few.

As far as being asked to do something I'm uncomfortable with I think it would depend on the type and level of discomfort. Physical discomfort I'll try my hardest to work past. Emotional or mental discomfort...likely a no-go unless over time my views on the thing change.

IMO I think asking this question to submissives will get a different type of answer than asking this question to slaves.

< Message edited by Elisabella -- 10/2/2009 9:48:34 PM >

(in reply to leadership527)

Post #: 36

RE: What are your limits - 10/3/2009 7:09:34 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Elisabella
IMO I think asking this question to submissives will get a different type of answer than asking this question to slaves.

I don't think that's necessarily so. There are slaves around with hard limits, the difference being that they were careful to pick a master who has the same limit.

I could say that having sex with others is a hard limit that he will respect. I could also say that it isn't one of my limits because sharing me is one of his hard limits. So I don't need to list it for me since it comes under his rules. He doesn't share so I don't have to have this limit, he has it for me.

And this being so, I could pat myself on the back and say that I would be willing to be shared despite my own dislike of it and aren't I wonderfully submissive, because I know it isn't ever going to happen. If your compatibility is high enough, limits become unnecessary. They are necessary when you aren't compatible in an area, not when you are.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to Elisabella)

Post #: 37

RE: What are your limits - 10/3/2009 7:23:13 AM

kyraofMists

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

The only thing that limits his authority over me is his own moral code of "harm none". If he thinks something will be harmful to me, Alandra, him or our relationship then he will make a different choice. He has instructed Alandra and I that if he instructs us to do something that we think will harm us or our relationship then we are to talk with him about it.

This leaves a lot of things wide open. There are no "we won't do" in our relationship. If we have the ability and it will not harm us then we will do it. It doesn't matter if it makes us uncomfortable or causes us any other emotions, we will do as told.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to geomease)

Post #: 38

RE: What are your limits - 10/3/2009 9:16:31 AM

Roselaure

Posts: 672
Joined: 4/12/2008
Status: offline

I'm not sure I am a "more experienced" sub, but I'll take a stab at it. The longer my Master and I are together, the more understanding and trust has been built. I cannot imagine anything that he would logically require of me that I would be inclined to refuse. Are there things he might require that I would prefer not to do? Most certainly. But refuse? No. I cherish my place, and his.

_____________________________

Once conform, once do what other people do because they do it, and lethargy steals over all the finer nerves and faculties of the soul.
-Virginia Woolf

(in reply to geomease)

Post #: 39

RE: What are your limits - 10/3/2009 10:43:18 AM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Elisabella
IMO I think asking this question to submissives will get a different type of answer than asking this question to slaves.

Heh... Let's pick this apart a bit... For starters, since there is no objective or community agreed to delineation between sub and slave, let's insert the phrase "self-identified" before either. So, do self-identified slaves answer any differently than self-identified subs? My advice is ignore what YOU think and go scan some "female slaves seeking male dominants" profiles. For extra fun, look in the 18-25 range. NOW tell me what slaves think about limits *chuckles*.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to Elisabella)

Post #: 40

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