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RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/4/2009 8:30:54 PM   
LadyNTrainer


Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lilboycaught
I'm going through this thing now where I feel like nobody understands me and I'm just a weird guy who digs "dominant women." 


That's kind of emo.  A boy can get away with being emo if he's very pretty, has long hair, looks good in Goth drag and is willing to make out with other boys for extra hotness points.  Otherwise, it doesn't go over very well.  And even on pretty bois, emo drama gets old quick.


quote:

This thread has taught me that even dominant women think I'm a weirdo.  So I was right.  Depressing to think I'm going to grow old without a partner, but frankly it's my own damn fault.  I can't even be a good subby.  Probably because I'm too selfish and self-centered and I admit I am.


Nobody here knows you well enough to think much of anything at all.  You're coming to your own conclusions without needing any help from us.

If you remain selfish and self-centered, yes, you will grow old without a partner.   That's life in the real world, and it's true across the board for everyone.  You can either choose to work on that and move forward in a constructive way, or throw yourself a pity party and accomplish nothing. 


quote:

But my question has been answered.  There really are REAL dominant women.  But a guy like me doesn't appeal to them whatsoever.


By your own description, no.  Selfish, self-centered guys are no fun to be around, and certainly no fun to be in a relationship with.  Negativity and depression isn't fun either.  I have no idea what else there is about you to like or dislike, but since all we can see here is the negative stuff you've thrown out, it's not like you're even giving anybody the chance to find out. 

"Good morning, Pooh Bear," said Eeyore gloomily. "If it is a good morning," he said. "Which I doubt," said he.
"Why, what's the matter?"
"Nothing, Pooh Bear, nothing. We can't all, and some of us don't. That's all there is to it."


< Message edited by LadyNTrainer -- 10/4/2009 8:31:55 PM >

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(in reply to lilboycaught)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/4/2009 8:50:11 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Another few hints after reading the remainder of the thread.....

The majority of Dominant women that I know aren't especially interested is submissive males who feel the need to throw pity parties for themselves.  This is not to say that we won't help our boys through their various low points in life.  However, that tends to come around once they are, you know, OUR boys.  Sure, most of us will offer a few encouraging words to someone who is down in the dumps, but we're not looking for situations where we are constantly having to deal with that.  It makes one appear too much of a drama queen.

I can't tell you how many threads over the last couple of years there have been on the qualities that they prefer to have in their submissive males.  Lack of self esteem or confidence isn't high on the list.  That's why you'll find that the Dommes who are seeking the lowly worm types are the ones who are often charging money.  If you don't see you as being worthy, why in the world should we?

This thread is enough of an example of a self-serving, depressing spiral for Me to sit here and say this isn't what I would want if I was searching.  I'd deal with this attitude for a very short amount of time before I told you to start being pleasing in your words and actions or find yourself another Domme.  I'd be more than happy to tell you to knock your self absorbed nonsense off. 

It seems to Me that you need to work on your self esteem and be happy with you first, before you drag somebody down with you.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/4/2009 9:11:53 PM   
dreamofthemoon


Posts: 10666
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline 		OP, to answer the question in the title of this thread... of course there are REAL female d-types. They all went to the famous Online FemDomme U and received their appropriate certifications there.

[/snark]

On the other hand, i agree with the general opinion/feelings here. If you are throwing a pity party, please don't invite me. Thanks.

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dreamy

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(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/4/2009 9:14:55 PM   
Arrogance


Posts: 185
Joined: 7/29/2009
Status: offline 		This is the height of lameness. As I'm sure it's been iterated several times, simply approach dominant women as you would any other woman. If normal women aren't interested in you, it's doubtful dominant ones would be as well.

Try and be as charming and interesting as you can be and it'll usually lead to good things. It did for me at least.

I'm with that pretty thing over there in the avatar! 

(in reply to dreamofthemoon)
Profile   Post #: 84
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/4/2009 9:42:06 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		*FR*

I have only read parts of this thread because I simply can't stand most of the pity party being thrown.  However, I wanted to reply from a female switch point of view.  Being on both sides of the whip gives me a better understanding of what is and is not attractive to the other side.  As a submissive woman to my Sir, I know what makes Him tick and what He finds the most appealing.  What He finds attractive is similar to what many Dominant people like in a partner, and what I like in my own submissive playmates... confidence.

Confidence, not arrogance, is sexy.  I love it when my Sir looks at me when I feel beautiful, or when I am discussing a topic of interest with people and He listens to me speak.  Knowing I make Him proud to call me His, feeds into my level of confidence, and perpetuates the positive cycle.

When I am looking for a submissive partner of my own, I look for the same things.  If someone is smart, well-spoken, well-grounded, and looks like s/he feels good in his/her own skin, I take a second glance.  If someone is whining, mopey, self-depricating, or frumpy, I am not going to pay any attention to that person. 

Give me a witty, happy, intelligent, respectful submissive type...  the gloomy, pitiful types need not bother.

Regards,
Switchy Red

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Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/4/2009 9:54:57 PM   
Arrogance


Posts: 185
Joined: 7/29/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead

Confidence, not arrogance, is sexy. 


Hey!

We like to think we're at least a little cute :(

(in reply to Daddysredhead)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/4/2009 10:11:19 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arrogance

quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead

Confidence, not arrogance, is sexy. 


Hey!

We like to think we're at least a little cute :(


LOL....  well, of course I can make an exception.  I'm switchy like that.  *winks* 

(I'd say more than a little cute based on the avi...) 

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to Arrogance)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/5/2009 11:52:40 AM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

Ahhh my next victim... kneel bitch!



Lockit, somedays you say the nicest things.

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/5/2009 12:57:07 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		I am a lifestyle Female Dominant. I do not live this lifestyle for cash, I live it for ME. So you've been on CM and the Pro Dommes have sought you out, no big surprise there. So block, delete, whatever floats your boat and keep on searching.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to lilboycaught)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/17/2009 7:15:16 PM   
AresNAphrodite


Posts: 4
Joined: 1/22/2009
Status: offline 		The Vanilla Cone...The VANILLA CONE!! I love you guys.

I have an empty profile because I don't have time to fill it because I'm too busy working Pro-Dom. And The Slut's busy on her back or Pole-Dancing

I have a vanilla cone because I'm on here to debate with fat girls and wimps about twice a decade.

I will elucidate True Dominance. It's control of Oneself first. Every time I see a fat 'Domme' I know she has no self-control...otherwise she'd be normal sized (I know diabetes...Thyroid...big-boned...whatever, there are some, but very few, excuses). Plus they often seem to have forgotten what love is about. But they might well be Domme to demand some love after guys rejected them for being too fat.

Every time I see a fat 'Dom' with the standard issue jacket, t-shirt and dangling whip I know that he needs external symbols to act the part. I know this because I sometimes work as an actor professionally and know what difference to character a costume makes.
He too has little self-control because he's let himself get fat. I don't wear any of that shit because Dominance is INSIDE. It even annoys me that I'm not allowed in fetish clubs unless you're 'in character'

And for lack of self-control there is no finer illustration than an un-loving or even worse, abusive Dominant.

I know what I'm working on, but the road's awful long.
A x

(in reply to queencaliph)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/17/2009 7:22:30 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Seems to Me if you were that good of a True Pro Dom, she wouldn't have to work the pole.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to AresNAphrodite)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/17/2009 8:03:52 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		*adores Lady P*

just what *I* was thinking..................


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Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
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Profile   Post #: 92
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/18/2009 6:13:53 AM   
zephyroftheNorth


Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline 		Nope they're all fake, I'm fake too.....ahhh hell EVERYONE here is fake....

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And there's a smile when the pain comes
The pain gonna make ev'rything alright ~ Black Crows

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Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/18/2009 7:53:53 AM   
AresNAphrodite


Posts: 4
Joined: 1/22/2009
Status: offline 		Oh, The Slut doesn't HAVE to work the pole. She LIKES working on the pole. And being on her back too.
x

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Are There any REAL Female Dominants? - 10/18/2009 10:31:55 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		Well, if you have to make a living from prostitution, I suppose it's a good thing that you like it.

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[page 23 girl]



(in reply to AresNAphrodite)
Profile   Post #: 95
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