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RE: The toyed - 10/25/2009 8:25:19 PM

sweetsub1957

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

It seems to Me that YOU need to change YOUR approach if YOU want a different result. YOU created this now YOU have to fix it.

Here's how you start:

NO!

Exactly! OP, I would tell her that, starting right now, things are going to change. Tell her HOW things are going to change, the rules as of now and that, if she ignores said rules, she WILL be punished. Also, know how you will punish her for ignoring and disobeying, and be prepared to DO it, should the situation arise. She gets away with things as long as YOU let her. Dont let her. My Sir was the most loving, pampering Dom I could ever imagine, yet I listened and obeyed, because there was no question of Who was in control.

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Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to LadyPact)

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Post #: 21

RE: The toyed - 10/25/2009 11:00:37 PM

Acer49

Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Demieh

So, as a quite fresh Dom, seeing as I have only been into the lifestyle about two years, I have one main issue. I have found Myself spoiling Mine too much, it would seem, and I have not an idea on how to cure such. I feel it would be wrong to punish her when she does not listen, because I have been the one feeding her the fruits of such retaliation. Does anyone have a clue as to what I should try? I would like to get My guiding hand about her collar once more, and bare that unquestioned tongue.

Since when does spoiling justify disobedience? The only thing to do is admit to her you have not done as you should have, reaffirm the action and tell her the consequences for that action

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Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
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(in reply to Demieh)

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Post #: 22

RE: The toyed - 10/28/2009 11:45:48 AM

littleone35

Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline

My Master spoils me but then i also spoil him. Nothing wrong with spoiling and pampering her as long as she knows you are the one in control. It seems to me that you let her have some control in the relationship and now you want it to change. As Ron said sit down and talk with her.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to Acer49)

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Post #: 23

RE: The toyed - 10/30/2009 12:05:59 PM

Demieh

Posts: 4
Joined: 4/4/2009
Status: offline

lol... we are not living at home, and I am a whole of four hours older than her. But yes that was once a concern. I thank you all that took this post seriously, and appreciate being granted the time of day. I do believe I will return to the forums here for future references. The Trial and error path is not a very successful one, I have learned.

(in reply to InvisibleBlack)

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Post #: 24

RE: The toyed - 10/30/2009 3:07:08 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Even if not at home, I imagine she has roommates. So, she has to stand in a corner while they watch tv? Has to masturbate just to the edge four times a day with them studying three feet away? Very difficult to do anything in such a situation.

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Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to Demieh)

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Post #: 25