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[Poll]

Dacryphilia (arousal from tears)

I am aroused by tears in any circumstance.

17% (6)

I am not aroused by tears at all.

35% (12)

I am aroused by tears only in joy.

5% (2)

I am aroused by tears only in pain (emotional).

5% (2)

I am aroused by tears only in pain (physical).

17% (6)

I am unsure if this has any affect on me.

17% (6)

Total Votes : 34

(last vote on : 8/28/2008 7:17:31 AM)
(Poll will run till: -- )

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Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 10:22:54 AM

Maltor

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I am curious how many people find that tears arouse them and in what circustances.

I myself am aroused by tears... Questions or comments are also welcome.

M.

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 11:21:21 AM

proudsub

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quote:

I am curious how many people find that tears arouse them and in what circustances.

I'm assuming you mean tears in others, or do you mean your own tears?

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 11:29:37 AM

Maltor

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Thanks for asking since I wasn't clear.

Tears in others is what I speak of, not our own tears.

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 11:43:33 AM

proudsub

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Tears in my partner don't arouse me, they depress me.

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 11:51:25 AM

theroebabe

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my former dom was a sadist and the sight of my tears during play defintely got him aroused.

Roe

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 11:55:59 AM

Maltor

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It's kind of strange at first... and took me a while to figure out what was arousing me about the tears... but it's actually not all that uncommon from what I have heard... but I don't like going off just hearsay... hence the poll. For me I think it has to do with the vulnerability it shows... though under different circumstances I do not believe that is all.

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 3:13:00 PM

afmvdp

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Depends on the situation really...can be an empathic situation or a lustful one, so it's not the most direct question. Bringing someone to a level of pleasure in which they cry is quite an erotic thing to me...someone emotionally distraught normally is not.

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 5:04:49 PM

jillwfsub4blkdom

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Roe,
i had the same experience with a former Dom. i hate to cry.

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 5:12:09 PM

siamsa24

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I cry very easily, but I still think that there is nothing like being brought to tears and then having them gently kissed away. It's not exactly erotic, but it is nice and I get to see two extremes of my dom in just a few moments.

< Message edited by siamsa24 -- 9/1/2004 5:13:44 PM >

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 7:06:00 PM

theroebabe

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quote:

ORIGINAL: jillwfsub4blkdom

Roe,
i had the same experience with a former Dom. i hate to cry.

Hi Jill,

Well in real life i do as well sometimes i see it as a sign of weakness but when scening, well thats a different story. My former sadist dom brought the tears out in me and yes at times he would gently kiss them away, in a way its a form of release for me, since i haven't gone to sub space. Its been awhile since i had tears of pain i kind of miss it.

Someday maybe lol Roe

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 7:08:49 PM

basiasubrosa

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Not sure if this counts as "arousal" per se, but my ex was heart-wrenchingly beautiful whenever he wept, and always stirred me very very deeply.

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/1/2004 10:01:21 PM

Maltor

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I think it depends very much on a person and thier experiences, on how they will react to any given situation... along with how they themselves percieve the situation... I see tears... no matter what form they are in as pure and raw emotion.... however... to clarify, I don't like seeing someone in emotional distress... When I see something like that I have a tendancy to want to fix it.

quote:

Hi Jill,

Well in real life i do as well sometimes i see it as a sign of weakness but when scening, well thats a different story. My former sadist dom brought the tears out in me and yes at times he would gently kiss them away, in a way its a form of release for me, since i haven't gone to sub space. Its been awhile since i had tears of pain i kind of miss it.

Someday maybe lol Roe

IMO tears are part of who we all are, it's just a more intimate part... I do not see it as weakness but as being human.

quote:

Not sure if this counts as "arousal" per se, but my ex was heart-wrenchingly beautiful whenever he wept, and always stirred me very very deeply.

Just as beauty has many levels... so does arousal... but I guess the easiest way to ask this is... what did it make you want to do?

I also want to thank everyone for the wonderful responses.

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/2/2004 4:54:31 AM

kiki blue

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My ex would find himself aroused when I cried, he said that when I was upset it made him want to protect me. And because I was in need of protection and vulnerable, it turned him on.

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/2/2004 5:49:18 AM

smilezz

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I hate to cry....i find my tears as my own weakness..and i hate the weakness within myself. I was taught early in my life this was the case, that there was no reason to cry. I have gotten a wee bit better about showing that emotion to Thorns...but no one else. ughz!

Hope y'all have a good day!

~smilezz~

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/2/2004 7:29:23 AM

Maltor

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kiki,

Wonderfully said... that is a large part of how I see it as well...

smilezz,

I am glad to hear you are growing and opening up with Thorns... *smiles*

afmvdp,

I meant to reply to you earlier and didn'y... Yes that is very erotic, but isn't is also a rush when you can protect and take care of someone in need? Even emotional anguish?

On a side note, could you please define what empathy in this situation means to you?

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/2/2004 9:58:20 AM

Kooth

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I am aroused by tears, whether joy or distress, emotional or physical, if it is in the right context, as several have said. If it was not intentional, or was from unwanted pain, from an outside source perhaps, then I too would probably want to soothe and step in to "fix" the problem. Often, though, I have been told that I shouldn't or couldn't fix it, that though the tears were a sign something was wrong, I should just be empathetic, a shoulder to cry on.

In a similar vein, I learned from my ex that to accept her tears, and not be in a rush to "cure" them, was a sign that I accepted all of her, not just the good, joyous times. We grew closer because she felt able to be more open with me all of the time, in all ways, and didn't have to hide or alleviate her distress in case it displeased me. I didn't enjoy this kind, because they were the result of growing pains, but we went on to explore intentional frustration, and that was very powerful indeed. She did a lot of digital self-portraiture during this time and some of her work was amazing, she captured expressions I had always thought too fluid to see in one snapshot. I'd like to share that, I'm going to see if I have permission from her to do so.

I think there are probably different expressions that go along with the tears, depending on what caused them. A spanking will cause you to screw up your face (I mean tighten the muscles - lol) in different concentration, thinking about the immediacy of the pain, than orgasm denial will, because that frustration goes on for longer and the end may not be in sight. And I think tears of joy, caught by a smile below, are the most expressive of all, because it's usually from sudden relief, and you get to see the change from one feeling to the other in their face. The corners of the mouth waver back and forth uncertainly, tilted down, then up, the forehead wrinkles ease and fade...

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/2/2004 10:38:21 AM

Maltor

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Great post Kooth,

I know what you mean by not being able to fix everything... but if you comfort them, reassure them and stand beside them... aren't you in essence fixing some of it for them (some of the emotional anyways)?

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/2/2004 11:44:04 AM

afmvdp

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Yes but protection doesn't equal arousal for me. That is just part of my normal duties and tasks. It would be like me being aroused by going to work or making dinner. Empathy is the understanding, comforting, consoling that goes along with aiding in emotional recoveries. Emotional anguish also doesn't do it for me, as it is a sign of distress normally not of my desire or theirs. It is a wound that must be mended. Often times these are uncovered during the initial stages, as is a necessary course in the way I process things. Again, I may not be the norm to which you should judge the answer by.

To bring them to an uncontrolled emotional, physical, psychological break where they are so removed that tears, screams, almost to convulsions begins.

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/2/2004 11:46:39 AM

Synocense

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For those of you who don't know, "Maltor" is my Master :)

When I first became aware of his reaction to my tears, I was confused - to say the least. I didn't understand how he could become aroused by my pain, real emotional pain. I thought it a bit twisted to be honest. "Was he going to intentionally make me cry now?" Thankfully we talked about it and I have since noticed a pattern. When I am hurting, from an outside source, a day on the job, whatever...and I cry over it, he doesn't grin and jump my bones because he's become aroused. He is gentle and caring and talks me though the entire episode, giving his opinion and yes...always reassuring me that it's OK for me to hurt, to cry, just as much as it is for me to laugh and sing. Sometimes there is more of one than the other, but guess what? Thats OK too. :) Just knowing he is here for me, is a fix. I am not going to be belittled or degraded because I cry like a baby. Knowing that i don't have to hide from him like I have had to in the past, is a rush and truly the meaning of slave freedom to me. In the end, when he feels the urge to use me, it's more intense than usual. I sure understand it now and am certainly not complaining! *lol*

Syn

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RE: Dacryphilia (arousal from tears) - 9/2/2004 11:51:20 AM

Maltor

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quote:

ORIGINAL: afmvdp
Again, I may not be the norm to which you should judge the answer by.

And how many of us here should be judged as norm? *S* Maybe you are the norm and I'm the strange one... that's okay too *G*

No, it doesn't mean I will be aroused by those things in other circumstances, but coupled with the raw emotion of it, it does for me...

Empathy for me means something deeper and different.... what you described I consider normal in dealing with any emotional scars/wounds/trauma/fear.... Remember just because raw emotion (read tears) arouses me doesn't mean I would forsake caring for her over my own desires.

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