RE: I Admit It I........

RE: I Admit It I........ (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity

Message

WhoreMods -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/25/2017 4:47:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jlf1961 And maybe the bear is only looking to borrow a cup of sugar, or maybe invite you over for coffee or dinner? Wondering if there's a marmalade sandwich going spare, perhaps? [img]http://www.animatormag.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/paddington-on-station.jpg[/img]

jlf1961 -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/29/2017 7:38:05 AM)
I admit my sister has been complaining of a sore throat since Friday. I admit my sister looked like she had the mumps on Saturday, at which time the family suggested she go to the ER. I admit we made the suggestion Sunday, and Monday, and Tuesday..... I admit we gave her no choice today.... I admit she does not have the mumps... She has a severe case of strep throat. I admit that my sister has a stubborn streak that defies any kind of logical definition, defies reason, defies common sense.... I also admit she would not have argued with mom if Mom would have told her to go to the doctor...... I also admit that at this point I want to connect a combat boot to my sisters butt with great force.

WhoreMods -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/29/2017 9:08:12 AM)
At least strep throat is a bit less life threatening to somebody this side of puberty than mumps. I take it she's acting smug because everybody was saying it was this kids' disease but it turned out that she had that kids' disease instead?

jlf1961 -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/29/2017 11:39:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhoreMods At least strep throat is a bit less life threatening to somebody this side of puberty than mumps. I take it she's acting smug because everybody was saying it was this kids' disease but it turned out that she had that kids' disease instead? The issue right now is that she let it go so long that even with the antibiotics, she is basically incapable of eating solid food, at all, and the ER doctor was actually tempted to admit her. The only thing that stopped him was the fact that sis has full court ordered custody of her grandson, and with this being prime hog eradication weather, I have only been home two out of the last 8 nights. which brings me to a question I wanted to ask, do you think it is possible for you to acquire and ship a Holland and Holland .700 nitro express single shot rifle? Or maybe one of the main battery guns from HMS Belfast? Or a Challenger main battle tank? It seems that one of my clients has a boar on his property that has not only destroyed every trap we have set, but also managed to open the outer wall of a feed storage building that happened to be a bloody steel building, and, along with his mates devoured about 3 grand worth of cattle feed. I suspect that if we get this particular animal, we may actually set a state if not national record on size. Edited to add: The state wildlife department rep who has seen the damage laughed when we (property owner and myself) asked if we could use IED's to dispose of said boar, while pointing out that if we were to do so, it would violate about 5 state and 7 federal laws.

WhoreMods -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/29/2017 11:49:09 AM)
Are rocket propelled grenades covered by the second? That sounds a serious hog.

ShaharThorne -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/29/2017 1:29:50 PM)
Come and get me...I'll bring my arsenal...

jlf1961 -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/29/2017 3:12:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ShaharThorne Come and get me...I'll bring my arsenal... You, oh excitable one, have a serious shoulder impairment. And then there is the old adage, when dealing with a charging hog, its every man or woman for themselves (it helps if you have a brit or two with a ball and chain on their ankles or maybe with their shoe laces tied together) does improve ones chances of escape.

ShaharThorne -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/29/2017 6:22:18 PM)
Ouch...making me laugh does hurt my shoulder! The teenager who brings me eggs got himself a boar the other day...his daddy was so proud.

jlf1961 -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/29/2017 10:32:18 PM)
I admit that Wednesday seemed more like a Monday. Early I said I had finally got my sis to see doc and diagnosed with severe strep.... So, niece and her bf decided they were going to come out to the house to help with munchmonster and whatever other stuff, and.... 1 block from their house a gun in a ford truck ran a stop sign, hooked a hard right turn and..... Hit niece and her bf head on. BF got exactly two bruises. Niece bit through her lower lip, banged her head (very mild concussion) knocked two teeth loose, has a bruise from right shoulder to left hip from seat belt, a bruise on her right thigh (not sure how that happened) a big bruise and knot on her right shin (dash board?) but other wise fine. Her boyfriend's truck is totaled, as was the ford that hit them. And strangely enough, police responded within 3 minutes (seems driver of the ford got a heads up they were on their way to pick him up.) So, I was sure today had to be a monday. I am also trying to figure a way to prove that WhoreMods is responsible for today's medical problems, the size of the super hog tearing up metal barns (probably some diabolical experiment conducted in his garage or basement)

WhoreMods -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/30/2017 7:19:53 AM)
If I was breeding megahogs I'd be setting them loose to wreak havoc in the home counties, not Texas.

jlf1961 -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/30/2017 10:11:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhoreMods If I was breeding megahogs I'd be setting them loose to wreak havoc in the home counties, not Texas. Ha! so you admit it! Which is to say a denial is actually an admission of guilt... Oh my god, I may have contracted Donald Trump syndrome!

WhoreMods -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/30/2017 10:39:40 AM)
[:D] You need to detox. Maybe putting a trump mask on this uberpig once you've killed it would help?

jlf1961 -> RE: I Admit It I........ (11/30/2017 2:24:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhoreMods [:D] You need to detox. Maybe putting a trump mask on this uberpig once you've killed it would help? what I need is to go on a two day airborne infantry bender! which of course requires booze, steaks, comrades in arms (the surviving few of which are scattered all over the US) and a location in which breakable objects and items which, due to inebriated stumbling around, might break said revelers are at a minimum. A custom, sad to say, the British seem to have relegated to less civilized areas of the Empire, and frowned on by her majesty's armed forces. And while I have an ample supply of booze and steaks, the local gi bars are primarily the domain of US Air Force personnel (both retired and active) who have never eaten dirt or had any direct contact with enemy combatants except perhaps through a bomb site (or modern equivalent there of) or a computer telling them when to shoot. Although, admittedly, this part of west Texas seems to have more than its quota of former marines, but what self respecting infantryman would associate with such a low class insane individual who thinks running across an open beach while being shelled and shot at is the way to fight a war?

peppermint -> RE: I Admit It I........ (12/1/2017 9:42:56 AM)
I admit I want to know when you get this monstrous critter. Also will need pictures and something in the picture so we'll be able to compare the sizes. My biggest critter problem at the moment are wild turkeys. They can eat a lot of feed, although they haven't even begun to approach thousands as your critter has. Am having to go out to feed the geese every day and stand guard.

jlf1961 -> RE: I Admit It I........ (12/1/2017 9:55:44 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: peppermint I admit I want to know when you get this monstrous critter. Also will need pictures and something in the picture so we'll be able to compare the sizes. My biggest critter problem at the moment are wild turkeys. They can eat a lot of feed, although they haven't even begun to approach thousands as your critter has. Am having to go out to feed the geese every day and stand guard. At this point, I called in a guy I know from houston, he has bigger and stronger traps, we want it alive. Now, after we catch it, if we catch it, there is a debate on what to do with it. It will either go to a zoo, although a couple of us want to turn it loose in the capital in DC......

DesFIP -> RE: I Admit It I........ (12/1/2017 10:43:50 AM)
I admit The Man is enjoying himself immensely today. He's rented a skidsteer with enclosed cab including heat and is digging up rocks on the driveway in comfort. It even has headlights for when it gets dark.

WhoreMods -> RE: I Admit It I........ (12/1/2017 10:47:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jlf1961 quote: ORIGINAL: peppermint I admit I want to know when you get this monstrous critter. Also will need pictures and something in the picture so we'll be able to compare the sizes. My biggest critter problem at the moment are wild turkeys. They can eat a lot of feed, although they haven't even begun to approach thousands as your critter has. Am having to go out to feed the geese every day and stand guard. At this point, I called in a guy I know from houston, he has bigger and stronger traps, we want it alive. Now, after we catch it, if we catch it, there is a debate on what to do with it. It will either go to a zoo, although a couple of us want to turn it loose in the capital in DC...... Would one of those guns that fires a hypodermic dart full of tranquilisers be an option, or do you need a vet's license to get the stuff to put in the dart? If you think it's such a freak of nature that it needs to be taken alive to turn over to the cryptozoologists having a vet on hand might be an idea anyway...

jlf1961 -> RE: I Admit It I........ (12/1/2017 11:30:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhoreMods quote: ORIGINAL: jlf1961 quote: ORIGINAL: peppermint I admit I want to know when you get this monstrous critter. Also will need pictures and something in the picture so we'll be able to compare the sizes. My biggest critter problem at the moment are wild turkeys. They can eat a lot of feed, although they haven't even begun to approach thousands as your critter has. Am having to go out to feed the geese every day and stand guard. At this point, I called in a guy I know from houston, he has bigger and stronger traps, we want it alive. Now, after we catch it, if we catch it, there is a debate on what to do with it. It will either go to a zoo, although a couple of us want to turn it loose in the capital in DC...... Would one of those guns that fires a hypodermic dart full of tranquilisers be an option, or do you need a vet's license to get the stuff to put in the dart? If you think it's such a freak of nature that it needs to be taken alive to turn over to the cryptozoologists having a vet on hand might be an idea anyway... Look, considering the damage to a metal barn, steel cage traps, and trees he has rubbed up against, I turned down $2000 to go after him. Hell in repairing the traps I put out, I am out $3250. But then, to be honest, huge hogs in this part of texas is the fault of the ranchers themselves. Filling feed troughs in pastures with 200 to 500 pounds of feed every couple of days is what has got these pigs booming to godzilla proportions. And not the hunters or the Fish and Game department can convince these idiots to stop, or at least put the feed troughs closer to the main barn in a central location so guys they hire to hunt the damn things are trying to cover a couple of thousand acres a night. Now there is a certain anti gun alleged scotsman who I would like to invite over and give him a nice warm fire, surrounded by a few dozen 100 pound bags of sweet feed. I think the term is 'live bait.' I would even gladly give him a firearm, a replica 1770 British brown bess flintlock musket, and maybe a flintlock pistol and 1770 era British bayonet as well.

WhoreMods -> RE: I Admit It I........ (12/1/2017 11:41:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jlf1961 quote: ORIGINAL: WhoreMods quote: ORIGINAL: jlf1961 quote: ORIGINAL: peppermint I admit I want to know when you get this monstrous critter. Also will need pictures and something in the picture so we'll be able to compare the sizes. My biggest critter problem at the moment are wild turkeys. They can eat a lot of feed, although they haven't even begun to approach thousands as your critter has. Am having to go out to feed the geese every day and stand guard. At this point, I called in a guy I know from houston, he has bigger and stronger traps, we want it alive. Now, after we catch it, if we catch it, there is a debate on what to do with it. It will either go to a zoo, although a couple of us want to turn it loose in the capital in DC...... Would one of those guns that fires a hypodermic dart full of tranquilisers be an option, or do you need a vet's license to get the stuff to put in the dart? If you think it's such a freak of nature that it needs to be taken alive to turn over to the cryptozoologists having a vet on hand might be an idea anyway... Look, considering the damage to a metal barn, steel cage traps, and trees he has rubbed up against, I turned down $2000 to go after him. Hell in repairing the traps I put out, I am out $3250. But then, to be honest, huge hogs in this part of texas is the fault of the ranchers themselves. Filling feed troughs in pastures with 200 to 500 pounds of feed every couple of days is what has got these pigs booming to godzilla proportions. And not the hunters or the Fish and Game department can convince these idiots to stop, or at least put the feed troughs closer to the main barn in a central location so guys they hire to hunt the damn things are trying to cover a couple of thousand acres a night. Now there is a certain anti gun alleged scotsman who I would like to invite over and give him a nice warm fire, surrounded by a few dozen 100 pound bags of sweet feed. I think the term is 'live bait.' I would even gladly give him a firearm, a replica 1770 British brown bess flintlock musket, and maybe a flintlock pistol and 1770 era British bayonet as well. If this pig is the size and the shittiness you're describing (which I don't find implausible at all: I once worked with a lad who'd lost a finger to a domesticated hog that was used for breeding stock), I'd want something that fires grapeshot if we're talking about standing it off with eighteenth century firearms. When did the navy start using twenty inch breechloading cannon? (Mind you, if its that size, you'd be better off filling a three litre water bottle with tranquilisers and shooting that at it out of a cannon rather than using a tranquilliser gun in him. If it responds to bait, maybe you could just mix some solid downers into it or something.)

jlf1961 -> RE: I Admit It I........ (12/1/2017 12:54:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WhoreMods If this pig is the size and the shittiness you're describing (which I don't find implausible at all: I once worked with a lad who'd lost a finger to a domesticated hog that was used for breeding stock), I'd want something that fires grapeshot if we're talking about standing it off with eighteenth century firearms. When did the navy start using twenty inch breechloading cannon? (Mind you, if its that size, you'd be better off filling a three litre water bottle with tranquilisers and shooting that at it out of a cannon rather than using a tranquilliser gun in him. If it responds to bait, maybe you could just mix some solid downers into it or something.) I was referring to that wanker I often called a emasculated citizen of sussex, who's nic is w**d d**e If it were you, I would offer something along the lines of a british elephant gun and a pair of hoodahs. Hoodah, firearm used by elephant riding tiger hunters as a last resort weapon, basically a 10 guage shotgun with pistol grips instead of the standard rifle style butt.

Page: << < prev 3631 3632 [3633] 3634 3635 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.578125