CallaFirestormBW
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Joined: 6/29/2008
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Well, I've been out of the loop for a while (getting one of my saplings married off and settled in his expanding Steampunk household), but I hope that I can present some less damning perspective on the subject of service submission. Service submission is not a one-way street. Admittedly, there is a pretty small pool of people who specifically orient towards this type of service, but we are not, by any stretch of the imagination, absent or non-existent (as 13 years with House Bladewing has shown me). The thing is, though, that the face of domestic service, even for those of us who run re-creationist-style households, has changed dramatically, due to changes in the realities of economic life vs. say, the late 19th and early 20th centuries.
Our household is set up with our authority-exchange dynamic being -primarily- focused on service submission, and, in particular, Victoriana/Steampunk-recreationist household structure. At the same time, we're a full-scale poly household, so the people who become a part of what we are, typically, are family first. One other aspect that has been beneficial for us is that we've also made ourselves available, in the past, as a short-term "experiential" opportunity.
A bit of realism is one of the first requirements in running a household of this sort. In this day and age, it is imperative to have a good grasp of one's capacity and finances, as head of a household, in order to be able to determine whether one has the resources to maintain and support a full-time, live-in service submissive. There is a profound fiscal responsibility when bringing a person into one's home, and the individual in question does need to have some process in place to assure that xhe is able to sustain hirself and serve with grace -- being hungry, cold, and not knowing where one will be in a week, month, or year certainly doesn't lend itself towards a graceful presence in service. In addition, for many individuals, losing 3-4 years as an adult in the workforce virtually guarantees problems -returning- to the workforce, should that be desired or necessary down the road. While it is nice to think that it will never be necessary, we choose, in our household, to be much more pragmatic and plan for the worst while presuming the best -- so for our servants who have positions in the working world that could be jeopardized by a long break in service, if we cannot provide them comparable duties within the household that can be properly documented to allow an unbroken resume or curriculum vitae (CV), we encourage them to retain at least a part-time outside position in their field. For most of these individuals, any funds earned during that outside work is -theirs-, though, if they are in residence with us, they may contribute a portion to the household, as all of those of us who share the household do. However, for those who are struggling to either clear long-standing debt or to create a cushion to assist in long-term survival, we may provide certain fiscal restraints regarding management of a servant's funds, to further the goals that xhe has set for hirself. This allows our servants to serve us without as great a measure of fear about how their decision is impacting them in the long-term, and, in our experience, this has provided us with a larger pool of truly dedicated and graceful servants, who have been able to truly invest in our household from a commitment perspective, because of the relief of not being forced to give up their security for intangible or unclear return.
All of our current crop of servants, whether in our direct household or one of our satellite households, hold positions outside the household. They provide domestic service (including butler, chatelaine, and kitchen service) because they enjoy it, and because they love being a part of the House -- and because our structure, appreciation, and due diligence as Keepers resonates with them. Were we to return to keeping a full-time servant, our estimates are that, in the current economic climate, in order to attend to things like board (food, clothing, etc.); medical; retirement; etc., we would need to be earning approximately $75, 000 USD per annum for the running of the household plus the first full-time servant, and an additional $18, 260 USD per annum for each servant beyond that one. If we do the math, unless one is independently wealthy, that can be quite prohibitive.
It is a little different, I think, when one is involved in a romantic relationship from which domestic servitude springs, but even then, there is a need, from my perspective, to be honest in evaluating one's fiscal health prior to making a commitment to someone to provide for hir care and well-being. Having sufficient healthy food, warm shelter, decent clothing, and enough tools to be able to participate in the activities that one enjoys above and beyond domestic service, are basic requirements for a healthy household regardless of romantic attachments. Unfortunately, one cannot eat love, lust, submission nor domination for supper.
I'd be happy to discuss more about this, including some of the more practical aspects, as it is a subject near and dear to my heart. Feel free to post me on the other side, also, if you wish, and I'll try to answer any other questions you may have.
Dame Calla
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Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"
"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer
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RE: Domestic Servants? Butlers, Valets and the Like.. - 
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