RE: Differences in what you want

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Venatrix -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/20/2009 9:53:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit quote: ORIGINAL: youngsubgeoff or just deletes his profile and walks away due to cunts like lockit, who has the personality of a wet cat. Typical geoff... when he isn't catered to and pampered/babied... he resorts to this type of thing. Good thing I consider the source. You missed your mark buddy. Indeed, Lockit. That's why I no longer respond to any of his more drama-filled posts. It's obvious he only wants to invite everyone to the world's largest, longest-running pity party. A little bit is okay - we all have those moments where we wonder why things won't go right, but no one wants to spend time with someone who is consistently rude, angry, and self-absorbed. My question is, is a wet-cat cunt a synonym for a dripping pussy?

CalifChick -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/20/2009 10:42:59 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: angelikaJ What you are unable to see in the above post is that you are blaming other people for your discontent. I am not writing this as any kind of attack; Geoff, before you can be right for anyone else you have to be right with you. Sadly, this will probably never happen. Same old Geoff. Such a familiar road to travel. How's that working for ya? quote: I didn't see this before I posted above, but god damn. It seems like you're blaming everyone but your nasty attitude for your problems, and I can't blame anyone for steering clear of you. You obviously don't care what anyone thinks and just came here to blast at respected forum members and show your ass. You aren't mature, you're acting like a typical 22 year old boy who can't get his way. Grow the fuck up and stop embarrassing us 20 somethings. Some things never change. And it's always someone else's fault. Cali

angelikaJ -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/20/2009 6:51:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: youngsubgeoff Heres the thing. I dont want advice. I want someone to listen and at least try to understand how I feel. Thank you for explaining that, Geoff. As I understand it, you are feeling miserable. What I am not clear on is whether or not you actually want that to change. It also sounded like you think that no matter what you do, you are fucked. I do hear you. However, if I have misheard you, please continue to enlighten me. I do not want this to be misconstrued as "advice". I am just sharing information. I learned that as long as I focused on the problem, it was mostly impossible to find a solution. I have also learned if you want what you have never had, you must do what you have never done.

Lucienne -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/20/2009 7:33:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: angelikaJ I have also learned if you want what you have never had, you must do what you have never done. I'm going to file this under "things that sound cheesy but are completely true."

youngsubgeoff -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 6:41:38 AM)
None of you really understand what I deal with every day. Those that do, have remained silent. None of you understand what addiction is. At 22, my hair is falling out, my eyes are sinking into my skull, and im losing weight from stress instead of sleep I have no real coping skills. The thing about addiction is it stunts your growth, mentally and emotionally. Ive spent the better part of this last decade in a haze of drugs, alcahol, etc. So yes, there are times with me when you are talking to a 12 year old. I do try to get better, but it seems like every time I build a little confidence, its shattred. Dont try to tell me your confidence wouldent take a major blow from your partner cheating on you, telling you your worthless, or even hitting you. I dont want to be like this. I dont want to be a stress case. I dont want to hate everyone. I want to go it alone, but this has gotten too big for me to handle on my own.

EbonyWood -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 6:49:17 AM)
None of us? Aside from the egocentricity of that statement it's pretty clear you need help beyond that of a few wise words in an internet forum. WTF you are posting angst here is beyond me. Get thee to professional help. As you just said, its too much for you.

honeygirl -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 7:00:52 AM)
It sounds like you are in a really tough place. What you have just written seems quite different from your original post and I am not certain if it is related to that. It's challenging for me to reconcile a person who says he wants to marry and have kids with the words you have also written in this post. I know in the past you've been given advice about lots of the areas you mention below. I'm going to suggest that, since you're at a moment in your life when your confidence may be easily shattered by others, that you focus on doing things to build your confidence while avoiding any romantic entanglements. So, you'll be able to build confidence based on areas where you have much greater control over the outcomes. Based on what you've written below, you might not find the best woman for the person you want to be since you seem to indicate you hate everyone and are emotionally and mentally stunted. Wonderful, well-adjusted women are simply not going to seek out a person who meets this description. Good luck with your music! I really love Lucienne's idea about the female drummer! quote: ORIGINAL: youngsubgeoff None of you really understand what I deal with every day. Those that do, have remained silent. None of you understand what addiction is. At 22, my hair is falling out, my eyes are sinking into my skull, and im losing weight from stress instead of sleep I have no real coping skills. The thing about addiction is it stunts your growth, mentally and emotionally. Ive spent the better part of this last decade in a haze of drugs, alcahol, etc. So yes, there are times with me when you are talking to a 12 year old. I do try to get better, but it seems like every time I build a little confidence, its shattred. Dont try to tell me your confidence wouldent take a major blow from your partner cheating on you, telling you your worthless, or even hitting you. I dont want to be like this. I dont want to be a stress case. I dont want to hate everyone. I want to go it alone, but this has gotten too big for me to handle on my own.

youngsubgeoff -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 7:09:42 AM)
heres the problem with the professional help idea. I cant afford it on my own. However, the State of Ohio says I make too much between my job and financial aid to qualify for state assistance. Call this an indictment of our mental health system in this country. Basically, if I want help, Im gonna have to attempt suicide or something.

honeygirl -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 7:32:58 AM)
"If" you want help? Do you want help? Are there any hotlines at all in Ohio that you can call? It's been a while since I've been there and done any volunteer work; there definitely used to be at least one hotline for people who felt suicidal. If there are hotlines there, have you called any of them recently? They might also know of some programs that you may have overlooked. In addition, have you considered getting an additional job to help pay for professional help? quote: ORIGINAL: youngsubgeoff Basically, if I want help, Im gonna have to attempt suicide or something.

youngsubgeoff -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 7:44:33 AM)
Yes there is a suicide hotline, however, the problem is, its temporary help. As for another job, Im a full time student and I hold a full time job as well. So Im sure another job wont affect my stress level at all [8\|]

Lucienne -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 8:26:46 AM)
Does your school have a counseling program? Most communities have social service organizations that offer free or subsidized counseling. Check out your local Catholic Charities. If they don't have it, they should be able to direct you to someone that does. honeygirl has given you some excellent advice. Reread it. And for your own sake, you really need to let go of the idea that no one knows what you're going through, or that no one knows what addiction is like. This is not that uncommon of a problem. The world is full of people who've dealt with similar issues in their own lives and the lives of friends/loved ones.

honeygirl -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 8:28:00 AM)
OK -- then I'm assuming you asked the folks on the hotlines about any other programs you could use, as I mentioned in my previous post. Frankly, if I were in your position, there's a high likelihood that certain activities would cease since I would choose to take steps to increase my state of health. Obviously, it is your decision to take whatever steps you believe will get you the results you seek. You've mentioned killing yourself quite a bit (not just recently) -- if you really truly feel that it is a matter of life or death, you should consider making decisions based on the gravity of the situation. I'd definitely take a leave of absence from school, if I felt it were necessary. Also, if you are attending college/university, I am genuinely surprised they don't have student programs that assist those with mental health issues. Seriously, good luck in getting well. quote: ORIGINAL: youngsubgeoff Yes there is a suicide hotline, however, the problem is, its temporary help. As for another job, Im a full time student and I hold a full time job as well. So Im sure another job wont affect my stress level at all [8\|]

Venatrix -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 8:31:43 AM)
After following your posts for a couple of years now, I've noticed that whenever anyone offers you any advice or help, you always have an excuse as to why it won't work. So, tell me, why should a bunch of strangers continue to spend their valuable time trying to help you by offering advice or a friendly ear, when you clearly don't want it? I think you enjoy being the centre of all this attention. There's no incentive for you to fix your problems is there?

youngsubgeoff -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 8:55:06 AM)
Venatrix, you have no idea. You dont know me, and you certainly havent looked for signs of me getting better. Your definetly the type to see the worst in everything. In all honesty, and I know for a fact that Im not the only one that thinks this, your nothing but a sad, judgemental old bitch. So go fuck yourself, because Im sure theres very few out there who want to fuck you. honeygirl, I did look around, and yes, my school does have counseling for free. Thank you for the idea. As for leaving school, I know if I leave Ill never get back in, just simply my nature.

Lockit -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 9:09:29 AM)
Calling your drama as we see it, isn't being a cunt or an unfuckable person or even one who is unfair. Repeatedly you come to these boards with emotional problems and drama that you continue by choice by taking the easy route out of... excuse... justification and blame. Calling people names isn't helping your pitiful case of poor, lil me. Even if we call you on what we see because you so invite it by starting these threads... you have been given sound advice. A person truly looking at his issues doesn't come back defensive, but reflective and willing to see what the problem is so he/she can resolve things. You are not there. You can always go to a meeting geoff. Many before you had the same mental health system to work within and many have had the same issues and the meetings and the people there who have been there have helped a great deal of people. You are not the only one or the first.

PeonForHer -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 9:53:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: youngsubgeoff Honeygirl, I did look around, and yes, my school does have counseling for free. Thank you for the idea. As for leaving school, I know if I leave Ill never get back in, just simply my nature. Geoff, I had counselling at roughly the same age as you are now. I recognise enough signs in what you've been writing here to be able to say, in the most forceful way: go for that counselling. You have a shedload of stuff that you need to get off your chest. Bluntly: I think what you're going through is quite beyond the scope of this forum.

CherokeeRose2 -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 10:14:59 AM)
AA and NA are free. You may not get ALL the counseling you need from them, but it's a place to start. Until you get your life straightened out, the last thing you want to be worrying about is finding a potential baby mama.

LadyPact -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 11:18:06 AM)
It's a slow day around CM, so I came back to this thread wondering why it was still close to the top of the list. I'm going to tell you three things, geoff. The first is that I'm not happy about the 'backhanded bullshit' comment that you felt the need to make. There were plenty of people on this thread that did their best to hear you and discuss the situation. That's really what this is, you know? A discussion board. Not geoff's personal venue to attempt to make other people his emotional punching bags. Second, you honestly don't have a clue about people's own past experiences, or those that they were intimately close to in their lives regarding addiction. You are not unique. Not in your recovery, nor in your issues. Maybe, if you paid attention to what other people said, you'd be able to pick out the ones who have experience with twelve step programs, either for themselves or from past experience with others in their lives. I can tell you this. Those of us who have helped at various shelters and such through our lives, have had the opportunity to be the transport person for those needing rides and have sat in on more meetings than you can probably imagine. This third one I want to make quite clear. If My boy EVER came to these boards and talked to these women the way you have here, he would be put on his knees so fast to type out an apology that it would make his head spin. If he didn't, he'd be released. There is no way I would have any male associated with Me, submissive, vanilla, or otherwise, who would embarrass himself (and Me by extension) in the way you have here and not have that addressed. So, in that sense, you may want to be grateful that there isn't a Dominant woman in your life or at least not one like Me, because you absolutely would be accountable for your actions.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 11:51:57 AM)
Thank you, Lady Pact! I've been doing my damndest to stay off this thread, but I have to say thanks to you, V, and Lockit, for speaking a tiny corner of what's on my mind. And, what up, XI? Hope you're okay!

Venatrix -> RE: Differences in what you want (12/21/2009 11:55:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: youngsubgeoff Venatrix, you have no idea. You dont know me, and you certainly havent looked for signs of me getting better. Your definetly the type to see the worst in everything. In all honesty, and I know for a fact that Im not the only one that thinks this, your nothing but a sad, judgemental old bitch. So go fuck yourself, because Im sure theres very few out there who want to fuck you. Judgemental? Absolutely. People judge all the time, as you did in your response to me. As far as what you think of me or what others think of me, it would be impossible for me to care less. Your words only prove what I've said. As far as no one wanting to fuck me, you might tell that to my boyfriend, given that I'm meeting him at the airport this afternoon. In any case, my words were really intended more to warn others not to waste their time trying to help you, since you've never evidenced any inclination to want to be helped. If you spent as much time trying to fix yourself as you do putting up roadblocks to the process of fixing yourself, you might actually get somewhere.

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