wiitwd

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osf -> wiitwd (12/22/2009 7:23:24 AM)
wiitwd is understood more or less, the question i have is why do we do what we do, specifically regarding submissives. part two is what keeps you going during those periods when you just don't fucking feel like it. i know true subbies never have those periods but have yet to meet that kind of true subbie

AquaticSub -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 7:26:58 AM)
Also a topic that you might want to research the many previous threads that have discussed this at length. [:)] I do this because it fulfills me. If it didn't, I wouldn't. As for what keeps me going... Valyraen does. He and I work together to keep things moving forward.

osf -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 7:30:54 AM)
i understand that he would help but what inner voice do you listen too. what is your philosophy that enables you to keep going?

AquaticSub -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 7:32:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf i understand that he would help but what inner voice do you listen too. what is your philosophy that enables you to keep going? I'm not one for philosophy overall so I don't have one to give you. This is simply what feels right to me and because there is love and support here, I will persue this course till either we break apart or one of us is no longer on this world.

Mercnbeth -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 8:31:26 AM)
quote: ...why do we do what we do... this slave believes that part of it is nature...and part is nurture. this slave responded positively to both parts and as a result, submissive is her default state. quote: ...what keeps you going during those periods when you just don't fucking feel like it... last time this slave can recall not fucking feeling like/refusing to submit to something was over a decade ago when someone intended to take her life, so this slave would have to say the will to live kept her from submitting to that. other than that, since this slave doesn't "feel" submission, she can't relate to not feeling it.

osf -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 8:34:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth quote: ...why do we do what we do... this slave believes that part of it is nature...and part is nurture. this slave responded positively to both parts and as a result, submissive is her default state. quote: ...what keeps you going during those periods when you just don't fucking feel like it... last time this slave can recall not fucking feeling like/refusing to submit to something was over a decade ago when someone intended to take her life, so this slave would have to say the will to live kept her from submitting to that. other than that, since this slave doesn't "feel" submission, she can't relate to not feeling it. not being flippant, a rarity

NuevaVida -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 8:38:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf wiitwd is understood more or less, the question i have is why do we do what we do, specifically regarding submissives. It's who I am. quote: part two is what keeps you going during those periods when you just don't fucking feel like it. i know true subbies never have those periods but have yet to meet that kind of true subbie The only time I recall when I didn't "fucking feel like it" was in a very dire circumstance and I was emotionally wilting. My commitment to my (then) owner and to my slavery to him kept me going. In my current relationship I have not felt that way. I suspect if I ever did, then I would talk to him about it, and I would keep in mind that serving him is what is best for this relationship.

hejira92 -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 8:45:12 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf ..... when you just don't fucking feel like it. You just don't get it, do you? I don't wake up some days and don't feel like loving Him. Submission to Him is not a cloak or role I slip on and off. Serving Him, pleasing Him and submitting to Him are as integral to me as my height and left-handedness. I don't "choose" to do anything in terms of submission and His ownership. I just "am". If this wasn't the authentic me- we would not have the relationship we now share.

osf -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 8:48:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NuevaVida quote: ORIGINAL: osf wiitwd is understood more or less, the question i have is why do we do what we do, specifically regarding submissives. It's who I am. quote: part two is what keeps you going during those periods when you just don't fucking feel like it. i know true subbies never have those periods but have yet to meet that kind of true subbie The only time I recall when I didn't "fucking feel like it" was in a very dire circumstance and I was emotionally wilting. My commitment to my (then) owner and to my slavery to him kept me going. In my current relationship I have not felt that way. I suspect if I ever did, then I would talk to him about it, and I would keep in mind that serving him is what is best for this relationship. commitment is a good one maybe i over analyze things but i have thought long and hard about why i would carry on even if not feeling the drive to i realize the submissive mind works differently but still has anyone ever thought about why they should be submissive when the mood may not be there and what was your thinking?

sweetsub1957 -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 9:09:24 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf what keeps you going during those periods when you just don't fucking feel like it. I don't feel submissive, I just am submissive. It's my natural state, serving and pleasing fulfills me like nothing else can. If I were not able to, or not allowed to, I would be miserable. Even when I am tired/depressed/or whatever, the desire to submit is always there. quote: ORIGINAL: osf has anyone ever thought about why they should be submissive when the mood may not be there and what was your thinking? I will answer this as though I were still in a relationship: Because it's pleasing to Him, because the drive is always there, and because to not be submissive would be unnatural for me.

DesFIP -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 9:16:03 AM)
Of course true subs have times they're too tired to do stuff. Smart dominants don't force a sick sub out of bed to cook for them engendering resentment. You break your toys and you don't have them to play with any more. There are times he's too tired also. So what? Doesn't mean he isn't still dominant and that if there was a critical reason that he had to get up and handle an emergency that he wouldn't. And even when he's flat on his back with the flu, he's still dominant. Just a sick one. The op makes no sense.

osf -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 9:25:14 AM)
quote: You just don't get it, do you? not being a submissive and not knowing you how can i fully understand ? that's why the question was asked

NuevaVida -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 9:38:39 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf i realize the submissive mind works differently but still has anyone ever thought about why they should be submissive when the mood may not be there and what was your thinking? In the simplest of terms, because it pleases him, and it fulfills me to please him. Put it this way - let's say he forgot about a really important meeting and woke up at 4AM stressed about suddenly remembering, and his best shirt was wrinkled and needed ironing, and he had to gather all this things together to prep for it, AND shower, eat, etc. He wakes me up, telling me he needs his shirt ironed and breakfast made. Would I prefer to sleep? Maybe. But even more important to me is that he has as little stress as possible (that's part of what love is) and to jump up at the ready and help him out. So you bet I'm going to wipe the sleep out of my eyes and start ironing and cooking at 4AM. You bet I'm going to do whatever it takes to ease as much of his worry as possible, so he can give a successful presentation and feel good about it. That's love. That's service. That's taking care of the man who takes such good care of me. There really IS no "I don't feel like it". The day I don't feel like submitting to him is the day I should rethink being in this relationship. It's just not a concept I understand all that well, because whatever it is I do for him is for the good of our relationship, and THAT comes before anything I may or may not be in the mood for at a particular moment. Think of it this way - I don't want to go to the dentist in about 15 minutes, but I have to, because of a problem that needs fixing. But I'm going to go, without even questioning it, because overall it's the right thing to do and I'm better off for it. I don't want to go to work after that, but I'm going to, because overall I enjoy getting a pay check and having the luxuries that I do. The big picture is what's important here. Not whining about how doing a particular thing might be a drag.

sweetsub1957 -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 9:46:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: You just don't get it, do you? not being a submissive and not knowing you how can i fully understand ? that's why the question was asked Just like I will never understand exactly what it's like to be a Dominant. I can see why You asked it.

sunshinemiss -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 9:57:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf quote: ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth this slave believes that part of it is nature...and part is nurture. this slave responded positively to both parts and as a result, submissive is her default state. ... other than that, since this slave doesn't "feel" submission, she can't relate to not feeling it. not being flippant, a rarity You are correct. Beth is a rare gem. We are lucky she is around.

LafayetteLady -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 12:06:59 PM)
FR- This is another one of those things where common sense prevails. For those who claim they never "don't feel like it," sorry but I have to call bullshit on that one. We all have moments in life where "we just don't fucking feel like it." I don't care whether it is a morning where we slept poorly and don't want to go to work, don't want to go to the store for bread and milk, cook dinner or whatever. It doesn't mean that we don't still meet our obligations....go to work, cook dinner, go to the store. There is a huge difference between "feeling like it" and "doing it anyway." As DesFip says though, it doesn't make either less submissive or less dominant. We are who we are. For those who would like to say they really do always feel like it, enjoy your delusional life, because no one "feels like" doing all the stuff they have to do all the time. That goes for both sides of the kneel. As living, breathing, people, we all have those moments of just being tired, drained, etc. We do what we need to do, we do what we are supposed to do. We may even manage to do it with a smile on our face. Maybe even be glad to have forced our tired or sick ass out of bed to do it. But it doesn't change that we didn't want to at the moment. When people are in a relationship and love each other though, we don't have times when we just don't "feel" like loving the person we have devoted our life to.

dreamerdreaming -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 12:12:15 PM)
Fast reply: Its not just what we do. Its who we are. Fish gotta swim. Birds gotta fly. We gotta be ourselves, or we're wasting the one chance we have.

hejira92 -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 12:21:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady When people are in a relationship and love each other though, we don't have times when we just don't "feel" like loving the person we have devoted our life to. And THIS is the point I was making! I cannot separate my loving Him and my submitting to Him. "Not feeling like" serving Him is the equivalent of not loving or respecting Him anymore. If I don't feel like doing the dishes- it happens, I'm human. I'll still do them - especially if there is a specific order (He always stresses the why I am doing something, not the actual thing). But I read the OP as what happens if I just don't feel like submitting- and that ain't gonna happen. And I'm far from delusional. This has been my real life for 4 years (going on forever).

osf -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 12:27:20 PM)
quote: This is another one of those things where common sense prevails. For those who claim they never "don't feel like it," sorry but I have to call bullshit on that one. We all have moments in life where "we just don't fucking feel like it." I don't care whether it is a morning where we slept poorly and don't want to go to work, don't want to go to the store for bread and milk, cook dinner or whatever. It doesn't mean that we don't still meet our obligations....go to work, cook dinner, go to the store. There is a huge difference between "feeling like it" and "doing it anyway." this seems to stem from a sense of responsibility, a commendable trait

AquaticSub -> RE: wiitwd (12/22/2009 1:08:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: osf i realize the submissive mind works differently but still has anyone ever thought about why they should be submissive when the mood may not be there and what was your thinking? I think you've missed the point. Submission isn't a mood. It's a part of me like me being bisexual. It's just there. There isn't a reason and there isn't a time when I don't feel like being his. There are times when particular commands irk and at me and I don't feel like doing them but I still enjoy being commanded. Maybe some people never have days when they get frustrated or annoyed. I don't know, I'm not them. I have trouble believing it but I'm not them so I can't say for certain. Either way, it really doesn't matter if I'm in the mood or not. The only times I really have trouble is when I'm in the midst of a depression. As for should... because if Idon't, then what the hell is the point of the relationship I've worked so hard for? He has his part to uphold, I have mine. These things take work. They are a joyous labor but they aren't easy.

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