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How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 5:26:00 AM   
Fallout212


Posts: 3
Joined: 12/30/2009
Status: offline 		Just a little bit curious, if you're a Dom, what are your thoughts on having an online relationship with a submissive?

Reason I'm asking is because, at the time, that is what I am looking for. I wanted to get other people's opinion on it. Personally, to me, an online relationship to me just an alternative, since due to current restrictions in my life, I am unable to relocate myself with that ideal Dom. I know that a webcam online could never substitute physical contact in real life, but do you feel that an online relationship COULD work, or that it would never work?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 5:52:14 AM   
antipode


Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline
quote:

feel that an online relationship COULD work,


If you enjoy virtual coffee and you find onscreen dinner tasty, it'll work just fine. Just sterilize your keyboard now an again.

(in reply to Fallout212)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 6:20:23 AM   
wisdomtogive


Posts: 636
Joined: 11/13/2009
Status: offline 		Hi
I do hope you do not mind me responding since i am not a Dom. It to me is a personal matter. It would have it's advantages and disadvantages. There are some here that online has worked very well . So if this is what you seek, go for it. Not everything is for everyone, and as far as for me it wouldnt work. I would be stupid to suggest a blanket statement that it can't work. Some it does and some it doesn't work, but if you feel it can then why not:)
Best of luck,
wisdom

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Happily owned by MstrDark1

(in reply to antipode)
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RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 6:48:54 AM   
Valyraen


Posts: 746
Joined: 2/14/2007
Status: offline 		I've been in a few online relationships, and in general they're alright. Very different from actual in-person interaction, obviously, and that raises some differences as a result. All of my online relationships, in retrospect, were much easier than an in-person relationship, simply because I could sever any interaction whenever I chose to do so (for example, if I didn't want to get into a "where are things going" talk and wanted to play video games again... which did actually happen) and make up any old excuse I fancied for why I hadn't been around. It's remarkably easy to lie when the other party doesn't know jack shit about you.

So... could it work? Sure... just be careful. Because these people online are only presenting the facets of themselves that they want to have seen, there's enormous potential for things to blow up nicely should either party get spooked or disinterested. I'll advocate my usual watchword here - caution. Move it slowly, and don't go falling for someone you've never met. Did that once, and the resulting fuck-up to my psyche took me a couple of years to untangle after she played me like a fiddle.

I realize that last part is a little alarming, but I was young, stupid, and more than willing to believe everything she told me. Ignored my common sense in favor of hormones, and I paid the price as a result. So... final verdict - online relationships, could they work? Sure - anything's possible. Just be smart and listen to your survival instincts, and you should be alright.


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There is no creature more loving than a hungry cat.

Valyraen in ValyraenandAqua

(in reply to Fallout212)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 7:19:05 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Valyraen
I'll advocate my usual watchword here - caution. Move it slowly, and don't go falling for someone you've never met. Did that once, and the resulting fuck-up to my psyche took me a couple of years to untangle after she played me like a fiddle.
Valyraen has it right.

One thing that I say over and over again and it gets denied over and over again is: Regardless of how much you talk to someone online or on the phone...you really don't know that person. You only know what they tell you. And without the benefit of face to face interaction, you can interpret things incorrectly.



_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Valyraen)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 7:26:29 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		I don't believe in an online relationship; I think that is a bit of an oxymoron. Unless you have actually met and distance separates you, that might be ok. But contructing a relationship solely online? No.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 7:35:12 AM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline 		if it's all you want and the other person is cool to the idea it's your computer and net connection, you pay for it.

as for me, i type so slow she'd never get off.

< Message edited by osf -- 1/4/2010 7:41:12 AM >

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to sexyred1)
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RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 7:40:06 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		I can't fuck my monitor.
Tried it once-those glass shards hurt!

(in reply to osf)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 8:05:22 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Fallout212

Just a little bit curious, if you're a Dom, what are your thoughts on having an online relationship with a submissive?

Reason I'm asking is because, at the time, that is what I am looking for. I wanted to get other people's opinion on it. Personally, to me, an online relationship to me just an alternative, since due to current restrictions in my life, I am unable to relocate myself with that ideal Dom. I know that a webcam online could never substitute physical contact in real life, but do you feel that an online relationship COULD work, or that it would never work?


I have no interest in it...........feel absolutely NOTHING about it.........which is why I won't do it.

If someone contacts me and cannot get their ass to me physically, within a couple of months at the most........they lose my interest.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Fallout212)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 10:44:44 AM   
babygurlangel


Posts: 85
Joined: 12/13/2009
Status: offline 		I have done the online thing once or twice.. if you find someone that doesn't mind it and enjoys it as much as you do then that's what will work for you. Everyone is different what works for one person might not work for you and vice versa best thing I can tell you is try it and see if it works or not then you will have your answer.

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 12:26:43 PM   
NihilusZero


Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		As a vehicle towards an eventual live-in relationship.

_____________________________

"I know it's all a game
I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
~Siouxsie & the Banshees

NihilusZero.com

CM Sex God du Jour
CM Hall Monitor

(in reply to babygurlangel)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 12:36:15 PM   
earthycouple


Posts: 4462
Joined: 2/19/2006
Status: offline 		I can't imagine creating an online BDSM relationship. The mere thought of watching anyone do anything on cam outside of smiling when I type something funny in chat is disturbing to me at best.

I want my victim in real time, at my hand and able to see, feel, hear, taste and smell all I choose to give.

_____________________________

D~

Seeking, searching, hoping, living, loving, jumping. So what's new with you?

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 2:11:15 PM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

As a vehicle towards an eventual live-in relationship.


Ditto... otherwise, I see no point.



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It's only kinky the first time!!!

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 2:53:41 PM   
Cdub2U


Posts: 69
Joined: 9/20/2006
Status: offline
Online and Relationship don't even belong in the same sentence. Online all you have is a "Pen Pal", except the US Post Office has been taken out of the equation. To suggest that a relationship can exist in virtual reality simply tells me that you would have almost no concept of what comprises a vibrant and healthy interpersonal relationship.

If one thinks that the above is possible then I shall give the advice of a computer professional to a non computer professional:

"STEP AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER"


_____________________________

"Free your mind and your ass will follow
the kingdom of heaven is within"
G. Clinton

"Can't you see, it all makes perfect sense
Expressed in Dollars and cents, Pounds shillings and pence"
R. Waters

(in reply to MasterSlaveLA)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 3:11:01 PM   
MasterAramis


Posts: 279
Joined: 7/29/2008
From: Connecticut
Status: offline
quote:

And without the benefit of face to face interaction, you can interpret things incorrectly.


Very true, Very true!

_____________________________

"He who would be a man must be a master. He who surrenders his mastery surrenders his manhood." - Players of Gor

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 4:38:38 PM   
SirJohnMandevill


Posts: 546
Joined: 11/10/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

As a vehicle towards an eventual live-in relationship.


What he said! Just my .02 zlotys, but an online relationship alone would not just be unsatisfying, it would frustrate the hell out of me.

OTOH, I've heard of Doms who had a live-in sub and felt they could get something from having online-only relationships with other girls. If the Dom and sub agree to that...well, whatever....

Purveyor of Fine, Handcrafted Kink

_____________________________

Iam an eroticist
I am a fully eroticized being
No more neuroses
I found my strip naked soul soup
With the deviant ingredient
---The B-52s

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 5:08:17 PM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Fallout212

Just a little bit curious, if you're a Dom, what are your thoughts on having an online relationship with a submissive?

Reason I'm asking is because, at the time, that is what I am looking for. I wanted to get other people's opinion on it. Personally, to me, an online relationship to me just an alternative, since due to current restrictions in my life, I am unable to relocate myself with that ideal Dom. I know that a webcam online could never substitute physical contact in real life, but do you feel that an online relationship COULD work, or that it would never work?


For most people, it would not, there are some that it might. but finding someone might take a bit longer. I don't know where you live, but are there not people who might be reasonably close? No one says you have to relocate to have a relationship.

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to Fallout212)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 5:15:40 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Lots of us start online. Lots of us are ldr, seeing our partner every few months and using phone and online to make the difference daily.

The physicality of it does make a difference, no doubt about it, but there are plenty of people here who have a mainly online relationship with the right person as opposed to a several times a week in real life relationship with the wrong person.

And if you connect, maybe he could move to you. That happens also.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to Acer49)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 6:11:29 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

I don't believe in an online relationship; I think that is a bit of an oxymoron. Unless you have actually met and distance separates you, that might be ok. But contructing a relationship solely online? No.


You mean *sniff* Red, that *sniff* we aren't really fwiends? 


_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: How do you feel about online relationships? - 1/4/2010 7:33:48 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline 		wouldn't it be hard to feel an online relationship?

unless your computer is far more advanced than mine

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 20
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