LafayetteLady
Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007 From: Northern New Jersey Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: eyesopened But I want to look at this issue from my own situation. My Master and I are straight. We are in a committed, loving relationship. My Master, for reasons of His own, will never marry me. It's probably silly but He's both a man of His word and one of the most stubborn people I have ever met. He does, however want to provide for me, especially in the event that He dies before me. If He were to get hit by a bus today, I am seriously fucked. If there were a remedy where we could file for civil union and have the same rights as marriage but without that really pesky divorce thingy hanging around, I'm sure my Master would want that for us. You are very mistaken eyesopened. A civil union DOES require something very similar to a divorce when things end. Even in the state which have it. Here in NJ, we have marriage, domestic partnership and civil unions. A domestic partnership in the state of NJ is reserved for people over the age of 62 (it might be 65, but I'm not getting up to check my statute books), regardless of sexual preference. In other words, it can be a man and a woman or two people of the same sex, but they MUST be over 62. A civil union is only for homosexual couples. Marriage, domestic partnership and civil union must all be legally registered within the resident municipality. Should the latter two decide they no longer want to be together, they must legally sever the partnership or union. The main difference with a domestic partnership is that each of the senior citizens retains all legal right to their property and when the union ends, that property will not be disputed. In a civil union, a "divorce" is still required. In the latter two cases, within the state, hospitals are supposed to recognize the partnership, but not all do. Company sponsored health insurance typically doesn't (although see below) and Social Security does not change at all (as it is not a state benefit, but a federal one). Your partner is free to make you the beneficiary of any life insurance policy he chooses, and it is not part of his estate and therefore not subject to being contested with the will. Likewise if property is shared as joint tenency with right of survivorship. So if you are on each other's bank accounts, not part of the estate, names on real estate, not part of the estate. Realistically, unless there is great wealth, contesting a will does not much more than burn up whatever assets do exist. On the other hand, if you and he have an open relationship in the sense where you each have met the other's family and spend time, a conversation about it could clear up fears of wills being contested. quote:
ORIGINAL: eyesopened We could draw up wills, but what would prevent my children from contesting? Even incorporating will not put me on His employer-sponsored health insurance. We could spend a lot of time trying to file various contracts to try to cover everything and that still would not cover everything. Right now the one-stop-shopping of these kinds of rights is marriage. We do have that option. Homosexuals do not. Without a will, you are not instantly entitled to everything he has even as his legal spouse. Married or not, with a will, what makes you think that your children would be unable to contest it? The legal union has no bearing on the ability to contest a will. I hate to use it as an example, but Anna Nicole Smith? She had the benefit of marriage. Some companies do allow partners living together (regardless of sex) to insure their partner. I know Novartis Pharmaceuticals is one. It isn't common but it does happen. As for "various contracts" not being able to "cover everything" a trip to an attorney that specializes in estate planning will be able to make sure that "everything" IS covered (except he can't make his employer offer health insurance). quote:
ORIGINAL: eyesopened This is not technically true since in all states, a marriage can be annulled if less than a certain number of years has passed and the marriage was never consummated. One of the legal requirements of a legal marriage then is for the married couple to have sex with each other. By saying that gays have exacty the same opportunity to marry the opposite sex is pretty much saying gays have the same opportunity to have straight sex as heteros do. Straight people have the equal opportunity to have sex with their same sex and gays do. So there is equality and gay unions would not be an inequality of rights. Actually that is another myth. Anullments by the state are essentially a waste of time. However, they can be granted within basically any number of years, regardless of consumation of the union. State anullments are based on fraud. Examples would be misleading a partner that you were going to have children and then refusing or worse yet having been dishonest about a known inability to do so. A state anullment would also be granted on fraud grounds if a homosexual married a heterosexual even though they knew they were homosexual (since some do not accept or realize until later in life). In any case, a "requirement" for a marriage to be legal is consumation of the marriage through sex is incorrect. Keep in mind, I am all for gay marriage. My explanations above were simply to clear up common misunderstandings regarding marriage, civil unions, domestic partnerships, divorce and annullment. After a dozen or so years in the field of Family Law, I kind of have most of it down from memory. I do, however, suggest that you and your master visit an estate planning attorney. It will be the best way for him to make sure that you are taken care of in the manner which he desires should he pre-decease you.
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