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Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 6:53:55 AM

Knighthunter862

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would you take a collar from someone that you was not in love with?

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 6:55:36 AM

AquaticSub

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No.

But others would, have and will in the future.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 6:56:28 AM

ForeverOwned

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No, to me that would be like marrying someone that i did not love. i couldn;t do it. my collar means everything to me and one of the reasons is because it was given to me by the man who loves me.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 7:00:17 AM

KatyLied

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It would depend on the parameters of our relationship and what the collar represents.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 7:04:56 AM

BitaTruble

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I have done so twice in the past. I would not do it in the future now that I've had a taste of how awesome combining my humanity and beast can be. It feels like too much of a backward step and I'd rather do without than have one without the other these days.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 7:44:32 AM

breatheasone

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Knighthunter862

would you take a collar from someone that you was not in love with?

Maybe. Love isn't the be all, and end all, when you are a slave, i am beginning to see that.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 7:50:22 AM

kiwisub12

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I didn't love my Sir when I moved in with him - BUT he was someone that i could see living with. He also pushed all the right buttons!!!!

And I did fall in love.

I could see taking someones collar for play purposes - as in we were a couple for play only, and left the emotional stuff out. I have to have some sort of connection first though, enough for me to trust them. But i couldn't live with him.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 8:11:53 AM

littlewonder

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absolutely and with a resounding no.

If it's not a committed loving relationship I have zero desire.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 8:13:50 AM

choccywoc

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I'd like to think i would'nt but that thing between my legs makes all the decisions in such matters.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 8:16:30 AM

sexyred1

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No, I would not "take a collar"officially. That would have to be a love thing.

However I would wear one as an accessory if I was just playing with someone. But it would have no meaning beyond the scene.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 8:26:13 AM

osf

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i'd like to know what a collar has to do with it?

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 8:39:56 AM

sirsholly

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take yer meds, Osf.

To me a collar is the same as a wedding ring. I would neither marry nor accept a collar with love.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 8:52:11 AM

mc1234

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I have in the past, but wouldn't now.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 8:53:28 AM

osf

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is a collar more of a symbol than her remaining by his side?

most seem to get caught up more in symbols, rituals, than the actual relationship

< Message edited by osf -- 1/10/2010 8:55:49 AM >

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 8:56:46 AM

alittleevil

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Knighthunter862
would you take a collar from someone that you was not in love with?

Yes. But i have to qualify that by adding that for me, the process of enslavement results in feelings on my part that are very close to "in love". It is not romantic/life partner love exactly, closer to a state of abject adoration. So while i was not yet at that state when Master initially placed a collar around my neck, i did expect that it would occur as one result of his enslavement of me.

Peace,
aj

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 8:58:57 AM

littlewonder

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quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

is a collar more of a symbol than her remaining by his side?

most seem to get caught up more in symbols, rituals, than the actual relationship

Yes the collar is just a symbol. Personally for me the collar isn't that big a deal...but I would not be with someone whether he collared me or not if there was not a long term lasting committed loving relationship involved.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 8:59:27 AM

DarkSteven

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Just to clarify, the above question and answers seem to not consider a collar of protection, a collar just used for play/roleplay, etc.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 9:20:51 AM

alittleevil

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Just to clarify, the above question and answers seem to not consider a collar of protection, a collar just used for play/roleplay, etc.

Hello,

Yes, that's a good point. I guess when i hear "take a collar" i translate that as "enter into a D/s or M/s relationship" and don't focus on the actual thing around one's neck. I am certainly "collared" as in owned...i don't often wear an actual collar these days. Me personally, i would not enter a D/s relationship that was less than absolute, and for that, an initial feeling of "in love" on my part is not necessary. I could, however, wear a collar as a prop if i were engaging in SM with someone else (if such a thing were to be permitted) and it was part of the play and it be no more than just that--a prop.

Best,
aj

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 9:24:44 AM

lucylucy

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Yes, in some circumstances. I'm not a big believer in that glorious Hallmark-card concept of love--the love that conquers all, the love that makes you hear angels sing, the love that makes otherwise smart people accept intolerable behavior like abuse, cheating, etc.

I don't mean to sound cynical. I am in love right now and have been in love before.I have felt the Hallmark-card version of love, but it's not the single most important factor for me in a committed relationship. Having initiated a divorce from a man I was in love with for 20 years and knowing without a shadow of a doubt that I was doing the right thing confirms for me that love is not always enough and sometimes isn't even necessary to make a healthy relationship.

My boyfriend and I don't do the collaring thing, but I can tell you that I had committed completely to him well before I was in love with him. We share a deep love, but to me, the respect and commitment between us is more important than the love.

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RE: Whats love got to do with it - 1/10/2010 9:38:43 AM

LillyoftheVally

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Knighthunter862

would you take a collar from someone that you was not in love with?

Depends on what the collar means, some people only 'play' when the s type is in a collar, I have taken a collar from people in that context. The whole ownership thing though probably not

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