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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 1:12:23 AM

Fitznicely

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quote:

ORIGINAL: aldompdx

A wasted mind is a terrible thing. -- Dan Quayle

He'd know

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 3:45:52 AM

DesFIP

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From: Apple County NY
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Or you could read the situation proposed as the two people become friends, and while he is offering his advice/opinions on things they discover they have a lot more in common then they previously thought. So they move into a relationship based on mutual liking and respect. They find through constant conversation that they are more interested in each other than in anybody else and are happy to not date anymore but wait until they can get together at some future date when they both have time off.

In order to show this commitment to people who may write them, they post this on their profiles hoping to end the HNG mail.

Lots of people meet online and form an incredibly strong connection. The strongest sexual organ is the brain.

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 3:56:54 AM

ResidentSadist

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From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
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You ask if it is normal for cyber collaring. It is as ‘normal’ as it is common among the never ending plethora of online Doms and subs whom practice it. Normal doesn’t equate to sincere or rewarding though. The cyber Dom/subs are typically created in this manner: "Marriage partner at the mall, kids at school, a computer, a few drinks and poof . . . another online Dom or sub is born."

Online ownership is only as stable as your Internet connection.

Online collars and ownership are not enforceable in cyberspace.

Real and tangible collars are not enforceable in real life. Owning a human is not legal or enforceable and a slave always has the choice to leave.

My advice about online and/or life in general is to do what is rewarding. If obeying text messages, having phone sex, self bondage with computer cable and masturbating on your keyboard feels good . . . have at it.

However, if you feel compelled to post a thread and ask if something you are doing is normal, I suspect you aren’t enjoying yourself. Otherwise you would have been to busy having fun to ask such a question in the first place.

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 4:06:22 AM

onmynees2u

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I will ignore the sarcastic remarks, as they are unhelpful. Thank you to those who replied with a non judgemental approach, i have heard your words. In all fairness, i would like to add the following...this 'Master", offered to help me, as a newbie, as He could read into my original profile. that was in hindsight too honest, and left me in a vunerable position. I feel for those out there who responded with a military like fashion, kindness costs nothing. Everyone was a 'newbie' ...my goal is never to become a caustic 'vetran'. And, perhaps there is also a cultural difference as well, life in New Zealand does not move to the insane pace that large cities do..N.Y.London,Paris and so on. This "master' and myself are meeting on the 17th Feb. For those who are interested in an up date, i will post one the following day.

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 4:15:17 AM

LaTigresse

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It is unfortunate that you only see the negative in the sarcasm. Your newbieness is niavete. And your niavete is showing.

It does not matter where you live. Podunk Iowa (my home) isn't exactly a bustling metropolis, in fact my only close neighbours are 4 legged and furry. Yet the game your precious, so called master, has played with you is as obvious to me as the snow piled outside my door. Your ignorance is the fuel for the threads that begin "Help!......" or "Emergency advice needed!!!!..........."

There is a difference between common sense and caustic. You would be wise to learn it.

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Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 2:37:34 PM

kushiels

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quote:

ORIGINAL: onmynees2u

I will ignore the sarcastic remarks, as they are unhelpful. Thank you to those who replied with a non judgemental approach, i have heard your words. In all fairness, i would like to add the following...this 'Master", offered to help me, as a newbie, as He could read into my original profile. that was in hindsight too honest, and left me in a vunerable position. I feel for those out there who responded with a military like fashion, kindness costs nothing. Everyone was a 'newbie' ...my goal is never to become a caustic 'vetran'. And, perhaps there is also a cultural difference as well, life in New Zealand does not move to the insane pace that large cities do..N.Y.London,Paris and so on. This "master' and myself are meeting on the 17th Feb. For those who are interested in an up date, i will post one the following day.

I, personally, was shooting for nonjudgmental, not caustic, but I think you are unwise to dismiss the "sarcasm" you perceived. Everyone was a newbie once, but many people knew what they wanted and were comfortable enough with who they were to avoid asking a group of internet strangers if something they were doing was normal. Because, frankly, who cares. What if we all told you it was normal and you should go along with it, and shut up like a good little subbie? Would that have fixed things for you at all? Bottom line, it doesn't matter if it's normal. It's certainly common, and dismissed by many and enjoyed by some. That doesn't do a damn thing as far as you deciding if you like it or not.

People here don't tend to soften their words. One thing I've seen though, a bit of honesty and willingness to accept responsibility for your actions goes a long way. Take the "caustic" (or common sense, not sugar coated) in stride, rather than dismiss good advice, and you'll probably find yourself more comfortable here.

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 3:15:44 PM

LafayetteLady

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quote:

ORIGINAL: onmynees2u

I will ignore the sarcastic remarks, as they are unhelpful. Thank you to those who replied with a non judgemental approach, i have heard your words. In all fairness, i would like to add the following...this 'Master", offered to help me, as a newbie, as He could read into my original profile. that was in hindsight too honest, and left me in a vunerable position. I feel for those out there who responded with a military like fashion, kindness costs nothing. Everyone was a 'newbie' ...my goal is never to become a caustic 'vetran'. And, perhaps there is also a cultural difference as well, life in New Zealand does not move to the insane pace that large cities do..N.Y.London,Paris and so on. This "master' and myself are meeting on the 17th Feb. For those who are interested in an up date, i will post one the following day.

You asked a question, you got answsers. You didn't like the answers so they are sarcastic. You want kindness get a puppy. You want honesty, that's what you got. No one told you NOT to do it. We all expressed the very real fact that "online mentoring" is typically something one does as a ruse to get to know a sub and then claim they find they want the sub for themselves.

The bottom line is that if one is "mentoring" there should be a certain degree of integrity and if they begin to develop feelings for the person they are mentoring, the solution isn't to send a "request to accept a collar of consideration" but to let that sub/slave know they are developing these feelings and ask them how they would like to proceed.

You asked if it was normal, we answered. Most here would not be bothered by online servitude and find it wholly unfufilling and have no problem saying so. Suck it up and deal with it.

So you are going to meet him next week. Good luck. Hope it all works out. (seriously)

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 4:01:01 PM

ceebee

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Congrats- he's actually meeting you in person, which is a step up from the online only self proclaimed "Masters". However, it's slightly backwards, in that real people end to meet in person before the subject of collaring comes up. And how can you refer to him as a "Master" when you have even met him? A master without a sub is a master of absolutely nothing.

Be prepared, be very prepared- He is presuming that you will form a relationship, since he's already in effeect claimed you. He may very well attempt to pressure you into forming a RT one, even if you decide you really aren't compatible- after all, he did offer you a collar. Doms, espcially ones that self proclaim themselves to be Masters, tend to get a little possessive of things like that.

Approach with an open mind- you are under absolutely NO obligation whatsoever to this dude- if you get bad vibes, don't feel you click, or have any second thoughts- politely decline hisa attentions and leave ASAP.

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 4:41:46 PM

PrincessDonna

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ceebee has said the right thing. No matter what anyone on here has said it can not change what has already happened. you seemed to me to be unsure which is why you asked.Everyone doesnt do on-line but for others that is all they do,just dont do anything that is followed by RED FLAGS!! Good luck,trust your own judgement

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 5:09:39 PM

ResidentSadist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: onmynees2u
I will ignore the sarcastic remarks. . .

If you do that, you'll miss the point.

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 6:00:16 PM

masterlink65

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how are you going to put an online collar on someone?

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 8:30:10 PM

afkarr

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You've actually gotten some very good advice- namely, to proceed with caution. So some of it came out sarcastically. So what, doesn't negate it's validity.

Everybody was once new. A lot of subs have made the mistake of falling for some assholes line of crap thinking that's what we were "suppossed" to do, or else we were "fake". Before you get hooked into some notion of collaring by some dude you haven't even met, see if you even like him first. If that goes well, you might want to see if you play well together. Then proceed from there, remembering you can walk- or run- anytime you want.

See this thread by Cookie for an idea of the potential consequences of ignoring your instincts, and the advice of others:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3053443/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#3053443

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 9:40:21 PM

sweetsub1957

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~Fast Reply~
So is this a thing where you two do plan on meeting in person & staying realtime at some point down the road, or is this online forever? A lot of relationships, including those started on collarme, start out online and then move to realtime.

~edited for a brain fart~

< Message edited by sweetsub1957 -- 2/11/2010 9:41:49 PM >

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/11/2010 10:32:59 PM

texangael

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quote:

Question; How is it possible

Obviously, for the twue Dom, all things are possible.

How silly of you to question that.

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/12/2010 5:37:03 AM

Kana

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*Yawn*

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/17/2010 2:09:41 AM

newsubgirl21

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I know that a relationship like this where the Dom sent an email to me and asked for me to be his collar would not work for me. This seems like a strictly online relationship. Maybe there are people out there who can get collared or collar someone online and then meet them in person. But really this is very unwise. The truth is you cant trust people and what they say. Each person has to prove themselves through their actions. well you can mostly just see actions in person. I am a new sub and I do have a Mentor. So this type of relationship must be quite common. I met my Mentor about three months ago online. And he has helped me to get my life straight, he has brought me from a very dark place, to a happy content place. Every bit of control that he has over me, I have chosen to give to him. I was the one who asked him to consider me as his slave. He is the one who is putting everything into place and teaching me who I am (because I am young and I didnt quite understand who I was. I have come to accept who I am) as well as what he wants from me. I have not met him in person yet. I will meet him soon. I am new and he wants to make sure that I am mentally prepared for him. He could be selfish and maybe come meet me and fuck my brains out and i would probably love it. But he is taking it slow, trying to make sure that he is ready in his life for me as well. He would never send me an email to ask for me to be his collar. A collar is very special to him. It would mean that I am his to do with as he pleases and I have no choice then. The only choice I have is if he is to be my Master. A collar must be mutually beneficially for both people in the relationship. Each person must need what the other offers. I agree with what someone said in an earlier post. I put him as my Mentor on my profile to stop the fakers. If there was someone who better suited me then he would stand aside and let them take over. I hope that it helps to see this from my perspective.

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/17/2010 3:31:26 AM

elleX

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.. i personaly beleive that online collar will remains a play fantaisies if not moving to a real meeting ,,,i am sure it can be fun for a certain amount of person,, but it is virtual,,, can be ended with a delete button at any time,, and both partner can lie easily about themselves if they dont plan to meet,
definitively not for me,,

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 2/17/2010 4:00:18 AM

ResidentSadist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana
*Yawn*

Is that cyber yawn the online representaion of a real life yawn or was that yawn just an online fantasy that will never come to fruition in real life?

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 3/1/2010 6:17:22 AM

onmynees2u

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[image]UPDATE: re online ' master '. All I can say is thank you to everyone who took the time and effort to respond. No doubt there are others who will benefit from my lesson. " Those who have never made a mistake, have never tried anything ".

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RE: Protocols of slave ownership...? - 3/1/2010 6:28:36 AM

SimplyMichael

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I just hope this guy doesn't mail her a loaded turkey baster...

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