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RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 2/17/2010 6:03:19 PM

frostbear

Posts: 3
Joined: 1/5/2009
Status: offline

Dear Estilore
Being a submissive does not mean being a doormat. There are too many Doms out here that are looking for a special someone. I realize you have put in time, energy and your heart to him, but you can only be true to yourself. If you feel you need more, explain it to him, give him an out so he can take the high road if he has honestly moved on. But let him do it gracefully. It will give you a sense of your own accomplishment to fulfill his last request with strength and honesty'. You sound like a dedicated sub, you should be proud of your patience, but there does come a time. Good luck and keep us posted. If you ever feel want to chat, message me.

(in reply to Falkenstein)

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Post #: 41

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 2/26/2010 7:18:38 AM

LeatherBentOne

Posts: 469
Joined: 9/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

How long has this been going on?

As a Dominant, I find the most meaningful thing a sub can do for me isto give me space when I need it. It shows me she is unselfish, putting my needs first, patient, secure and able to control her impulses to whine and complain. This is always rewarded and greatly appreciated.

(in reply to dreamerdreaming)

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Post #: 42

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 3/11/2010 6:56:32 PM

CelticPrince

Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline

quote:

What do you do when you feel like you are not wanted anymore by Your Master...and every conversation You try having with Him he is always too busy to handle... when before he would? though i ask him this he says it is not true and that he is just buys with RT life ( Which i understand completely) But to me His actions speak louder then his words. am i right to think this way or am i totally off base?

girl,

You suffer from a common problem that shows up on the board alot.

You offer a problem but with no background for folks to consider. More facts.. r/t or on line? how long together, how lonf since collared etc etc.

CP

(in reply to estilore)

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Post #: 43

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 3/11/2010 8:28:28 PM

DWCskitten

Posts: 199
Joined: 3/2/2010
Status: offline

OP,
Three hours in three months!? And He has lots of female friends on His profile but not you? Everyone needs space sometimes, but WOW. i'm no expert and i really do not want to make you feel bad, but i'd say He's moved on and you should too. Believe me, there are lots Doms out there. i live in WA and Master Sir lives in FL, and we talk every night on the phone, are going to see each other next month and later on i will be moving to FL. It sounds like your Master has no intention of moving forward with you. If i were you, i'd move forward withOUT Him and find a mutually fulfilling relationship.

kitten

_____________________________

formerly sweetsub1957.

New beginnings...my first poly relationship.

Proudly Owned property of MasterDWC.

(in reply to estilore)

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Post #: 44

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 3/12/2010 4:59:25 AM

badlilthang

Posts: 357
Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LeatherBentOne

quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

How long has this been going on?

As a Dominant, I find the most meaningful thing a sub can do for me isto give me space when I need it. It shows me she is unselfish, putting my needs first, patient, secure and able to control her impulses to whine and complain. This is always rewarded and greatly appreciated.

3 hours in 3 months is NOT giving the Dom space - it is a sad excuse of a man playing games with someone that actually believes in Him....what You mean - i sincerely hope is something entirely different than that..If a Dom had not had more than 3 hours for me in just as many months? Naw.....exit stage right for me...and just because i am curious - if/when with a sub - do You ever offer him/he the same curtesy of some space - or is it all about You? :-)

_____________________________

.Forgiveness is the fragrance a flower leaves in the air after being crushed underfoot.

(in reply to LeatherBentOne)

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Post #: 45

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 3/12/2010 10:24:51 AM

Nslavu

Posts: 342
Joined: 2/1/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: estilore

What do you do when you feel like you are not wanted anymore by Your Master...and every conversation You try having with Him he is always too busy to handle... when before he would? though i ask him this he says it is not true and that he is just buys with RT life ( Which i understand completely) But to me His actions speak louder then his words. am i right to think this way or am i totally off base?

If you're not communicating with your Master, why would you expect anyone here to form a meaningful opinion, based on your own inadequate information? I am a always a bit amused by threads like this. It's rather like having fucked up plumbing and the calling a fireman who is clueless and whining about it.

Fire!, no it's plumbing... waaaa there's no fire? ... nope its about plumbing.

Talk to the plumber (Your M) or stfu.... or maybe call Master Roto Rooter.

(in reply to estilore)

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Post #: 46

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 3/12/2010 10:38:45 AM

LoveHeals60

Posts: 3
Joined: 9/26/2008
From: LH
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: estilore

What do you do when you feel like you are not wanted anymore by Your Master...and every conversation You try having with Him he is always too busy to handle... when before he would? though i ask him this he says it is not true and that he is just buys with RT life ( Which i understand completely) But to me His actions speak louder then his words. am i right to think this way or am i totally off base?

This isn't about bdsm, this is about common sense. You need to remember the 3 fundamental laws of the universe.

1. When words don't match actions, believe the actions.
2. There are no exceptions to rule 1.
3. Ninety percent of everything is below average.

There, now wasn't that simple?

_____________________________

I can serenade and gently play on your heart strings
Be your valentino just for you

Ooh love - ooh loverboy
What're you doin' tonight, hey boy
Set my alarm, turn on my charm
That's because I'm a good old-fashioned lover boy

(in reply to estilore)

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Post #: 47

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 3/12/2010 5:26:00 PM

mstrj69

Posts: 295
Joined: 5/27/2004
Status: offline

If you are not ready to dump him by now, at least go to some munches where you can actually talk to real people and make friends. You might want to try this link to find them
http://www.domsubfriends.com/a-wwwdir/org.shtml Also, nothing says you can not make friends with other dominants and add them to your friends list so the next time he checks your profile and sees you have made other friends, he will either get upset and ask why or say good bye and leave you open to find someone better. Either way, you might have gotten a 4th hour from him. However even 4 hours is not enough. 4 hours a week is even questionable if he really wants you.

(in reply to LoveHeals60)

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Post #: 48

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 3/12/2010 5:31:52 PM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: estilore

For about 3 months now...i may have talked with him a total of 3 hours in that time

Learn to love him. Nurture him. He values you.

He is willing to set aside two minutes a day to make sure that you are doing great!!!

It could be worse.

_____________________________

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Post #: 49

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 3/12/2010 5:44:08 PM

hopelessfool

Posts: 988
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

If your not poly, then you answer is on his profile, with the slave with his name that lives 6 miles from him.

_____________________________

" I have nothing left to give, I have found the perfect end, You remain to make it hurt, disappear in to the dirt, carry me to heavens arms.....Dear Agony Just let go of me, suffer slowly, is this the way its gotta be, Dear Agony...."

(in reply to Falkenstein)

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Post #: 50

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 3/12/2010 7:45:25 PM

brainiacsub

Posts: 1209
Joined: 11/11/2007
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LoveHeals60

quote:

ORIGINAL: estilore

What do you do when you feel like you are not wanted anymore by Your Master...and every conversation You try having with Him he is always too busy to handle... when before he would? though i ask him this he says it is not true and that he is just buys with RT life ( Which i understand completely) But to me His actions speak louder then his words. am i right to think this way or am i totally off base?

This isn't about bdsm, this is about common sense. You need to remember the 3 fundamental laws of the universe.

1. When words don't match actions, believe the actions.
2. There are no exceptions to rule 1.
3. Ninety percent of everything is below average.

There, now wasn't that simple?

And as a corollary to No. 1 - courtesy Oprah - "When people show you who they are, you better believe them."

(in reply to LoveHeals60)

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Post #: 51

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 3/15/2010 6:33:23 PM

DomBlade64

Posts: 105
Joined: 3/14/2010
Status: offline

Perhaps he is working on something for the both of you?

quote:

ORIGINAL: estilore

What do you do when you feel like you are not wanted anymore by Your Master...and every conversation You try having with Him he is always too busy to handle... when before he would? though i ask him this he says it is not true and that he is just buys with RT life ( Which i understand completely) But to me His actions speak louder then his words. am i right to think this way or am i totally off base?

(in reply to estilore)

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Post #: 52

RE: How does a girl handle this situation? - 4/27/2010 2:56:50 PM

dragon200070

Posts: 93
Joined: 2/9/2010
Status: offline

Yes, you're correct in questioning your relationship. I've been a Dom over 20 years', and never have I needed a break from BDSM. My stress relief centers around BDSM practice. Neither of us needed a break untill she got lung cancer. Still we talk regularly. There is still a closeness there. Right now she's upstairs napping. She knows I play online but doesn't care.

Jeff

(in reply to estilore)

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Post #: 53