Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: A legend returns ...


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity >> RE: A legend returns ... Page: <<   < prev  15 16 [17] 18 19   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:35:12 PM   
heartcream


Posts: 3044
Joined: 5/9/2007
From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

He is what he is.


Yeah a legend. If he can find a woman who digs him that is a good thing, who knows more mysterious things have happened.

_____________________________

"Exaggerate the essential, leave the obvious vague." Vincent Van Gogh

I'd Rather Be With You

Every single line means something.
Jean-Michel Basquiat



(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 321
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:36:29 PM   
VaguelyCurious


Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BLoved


quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

You said before that nobody had made any points that in your opinion effectively refuted your beliefs so far on this thread.

I haven't seen anyone try this tack, so I'm going to:

Your belief is that casual BDSM reduces your capacity for love, right?

Well I don't know what sort (if any) of experiences you have had with casual BDSM, but for me engaging in casual BDSM is something which constantly surprises me with my own capacity for human emotion.

The amount of care and concern I feel for someone who has chosen to place themselves in my care is  amazing; the idea that all play with a partner I am not in love with must be soul-less and disconnected simply does not ring true with me.

I am sure that these feelings will be massively amplified when I play with someone I am in  love with, but I don't feel for one second that BDSM is reducing my ability to care for and interact emotionally with others.

That's my tuppence; I don't know if you will respond to this (your prerogative either way) but I thought that I would try and explain my feelings just in case.



You speak of your own feelings, but not of the feelings of the people you've been with.

Being self-absorbed is another characteristic of casual players.

As for why I believe casual bdsm to be emotionally abusive, I refer you to my essay: "Casual BDSM and Emotional Abuse: The Case for Love" in my profile.


I got quite a way through your profile before I gave up-I don't think I can face the essay at this time of night.

Fair cop that I didn't mention the feelings of my partners, but that is not because I'm self absorbed-it's because I don't feel I can speak for others.


_____________________________

Sthetic on FetLife.




(in reply to BLoved)
Profile   Post #: 322
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:36:55 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline 		But just what IS your position? What is the logical basis for your position? I've gone through this entire thread and your profile and I cannot find one.

You write about love, but I'm wondering whether you actually understand what the word itself means.

Living in itself is all about forming relationships, different relationships, all of which are formed of different transactions, interactions, rituals, strokes, payoffs and so forth.

Superficially we all crave attention, beyond that we all crave acceptance, understanding, empathy, friendship, and love. Some people differentiate between positive attention and negative attention, and will adjust their behaviour and ways of interacting with others so that they get mainly positive attention. Others don't, and for them negative attention is just as good as getting positive attention.

The thing is relationship psychology is so vast that you cannot generalize and differentiate between long term attention and casual attention. You cannot generalize and say that short term, casual attention is emotionally damaging unless you are completely ignorant of what a human being actually is and what life is actually all about.

The only basis I can see is a meatloaf of generalizations cobbled together in a never-ending whine to say you are right and everyone else is wrong.

I could engage you on this but I would have to first learn to walk on my hands and teach my ass to speak. And I'm just not prepared to do that.



_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 323
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:37:16 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		nm

< Message edited by lusciouslips19 -- 2/17/2010 6:38:25 PM >

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 324
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:38:24 PM   
BLoved


Posts: 642
Joined: 8/5/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss
Bob - you respond to that but not my well thought out responses? You didn't show me a post either that I requested. You, Sir, are merely a shit stirrer.

Good luck,
sunshine


Compare post 88 with 95, 99 and 116.

_____________________________

When your bdsm paradigm makes love essential, expect some flack from those for whom love is anathema.

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 325
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:38:34 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65


quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

FR

Hmm, never mind, I found the person, and they've recently come back, so.


OMG you aren't talking about meeeee are you?


Nooo, not you!

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to camille65)
Profile   Post #: 326
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:39:38 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: heartcream


quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

He is what he is.


Yeah a legend. If he can find a woman who digs him that is a good thing, who knows more mysterious things have happened.


I'm kind of icky and some people like me. Or are they just humoring me?

_____________________________



(in reply to heartcream)
Profile   Post #: 327
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:39:51 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SDFemDom4cuck

quote:

ORIGINAL: Level


quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy


quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

I got a funny feeling caitlin will never come back, but I hope I'm wrong. Piss doll, haven't thought about her in a long time.

Damn, now I'm thinking of another woman, can't place her name; she left and came back at the drop of a hat, was wild as fuck, a little off.


Sdfemdom4cock?

That bitch is crazy. she never like the Cos.


Me, Jo, and the director's cut of Dances with Wolves. It'd be a beautiful thing.


That would be completely Non-consensual and I am now emotionally damaged just from imagining a Director's cut of DwW. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.

You both missed me while I was gone...you know you did. Smooches



Hey beautiful

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to SDFemDom4cuck)
Profile   Post #: 328
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:42:58 PM   
BLoved


Posts: 642
Joined: 8/5/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet
~FR~  After the first page and a half, then I just had to quit.

...

lovingpet 


You jump to a lot of conclusions for having read so little.

_____________________________

When your bdsm paradigm makes love essential, expect some flack from those for whom love is anathema.

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 329
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:45:29 PM   
BLoved


Posts: 642
Joined: 8/5/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: redwoodgirl
Someone send me this link PLEASE


http://www.collarchat.com/m_1260319/mpage_1/tm.htm


~smile~

Thank you.

_____________________________

When your bdsm paradigm makes love essential, expect some flack from those for whom love is anathema.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 330
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:47:21 PM   
Wolf2Bear


Posts: 3204
Joined: 9/6/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BLoved


quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

You said before that nobody had made any points that in your opinion effectively refuted your beliefs so far on this thread.

I haven't seen anyone try this tack, so I'm going to:

Your belief is that casual BDSM reduces your capacity for love, right?

Well I don't know what sort (if any) of experiences you have had with casual BDSM, but for me engaging in casual BDSM is something which constantly surprises me with my own capacity for human emotion.

The amount of care and concern I feel for someone who has chosen to place themselves in my care is  amazing; the idea that all play with a partner I am not in love with must be soul-less and disconnected simply does not ring true with me.

I am sure that these feelings will be massively amplified when I play with someone I am in  love with, but I don't feel for one second that BDSM is reducing my ability to care for and interact emotionally with others.

That's my tuppence; I don't know if you will respond to this (your prerogative either way) but I thought that I would try and explain my feelings just in case.



You speak of your own feelings, but not of the feelings of the people you've been with.

Being self-absorbed is another characteristic of casual players.

As for why I believe casual bdsm to be emotionally abusive, I refer you to my essay: "Casual BDSM and Emotional Abuse: The Case for Love" in my profile.


Cripes...you explain to me in a reasonable way how when I meet some casual friend for sex or a play session without any strings attached...how that is damaging us? Especially when we both are on a clear understanding that the sole purpose for us hooking up is to get our rocks off and nothing more. Nobody is lying, there are no ulterior motives other then to seek pleasure together?


_____________________________

~Resident Sadist Approved~

Take the pain
Take the pleasure
I'm the master of both
Close your eyes, not your mind
Let me into your soul
I'm gonna work it 'til your totally blown

(in reply to BLoved)
Profile   Post #: 331
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:49:07 PM   
camille65


Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Level


quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65


quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

FR

Hmm, never mind, I found the person, and they've recently come back, so.


OMG you aren't talking about meeeee are you?


Nooo, not you!


Whew.



_____________________________


~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).




(in reply to Level)
Profile   Post #: 332
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:51:07 PM   
BLoved


Posts: 642
Joined: 8/5/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious
I got quite a way through your profile before I gave up-I don't think I can face the essay at this time of night.

Fair cop that I didn't mention the feelings of my partners, but that is not because I'm self absorbed-it's because I don't feel I can speak for others.


~smile~

Fair enough. I appreciate the effort. Should you choose to continue reading the essay I'd be interested in discussing it further with you.

Understand, I welcome those who can point out an error in my paradigm. I've no investment in being wrong. But also understand my paradigm has already faced several vigorous efforts to challenge it. It does not change without good cause.

I think that is no more than any thoughtful person should be willing to do.


_____________________________

When your bdsm paradigm makes love essential, expect some flack from those for whom love is anathema.

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)
Profile   Post #: 333
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:52:36 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BLoved

quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet
~FR~  After the first page and a half, then I just had to quit.

...

lovingpet 


You jump to a lot of conclusions for having read so little.


If I am wrong, then feel free to say so.  I found your high handedness very distasteful.  I also do not like to have to witness the dogpiling such as has occurred here that happens every time a more controversial opinion is posited.  I don't see a whole lot of discussion and exchange of ideas going on here.  I see a lot of defensiveness and semi personal attacking going on in both directions and just find it repugnant.  Now who is jumping to conclusions?  I was not here in your earlier dispensations upon these boards.  You know nothing about me nor I you.  I simply asked for an operationalized definition of the term "casual" so that I could intelligently discuss it.  Without providing this in terms I can understand, all I can do is make assertions and develop my position and points based on them.

lovingpet

_____________________________

If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


(in reply to BLoved)
Profile   Post #: 334
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:53:37 PM   
WinsomeDefiance


Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline 		I hope Bob finds his hearts desire. Everyone deserves to be happy. 

I hope you find your bliss, Bob.

One question.  Have you considered prescribing to the Clinton philosophy of sex....where its not SEX if its oral?  That might help ya, just a little, on those cold Canadian winter nights.  Every man should have the luxury of enjoying some good head.  And, if it isn't actually CASUAL SEX - just mouthfucking, then you have a win/win.

Everhelpful WinD

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)
Profile   Post #: 335
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:55:00 PM   
BLoved


Posts: 642
Joined: 8/5/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: stella41b
I could engage you on this but I would have to first learn to walk on my hands and teach my ass to speak. And I'm just not prepared to do that.


~smile~

Then I need concern myself about you no longer ;)


_____________________________

When your bdsm paradigm makes love essential, expect some flack from those for whom love is anathema.

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 336
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:58:47 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BLoved

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: redwoodgirl
Someone send me this link PLEASE


http://www.collarchat.com/m_1260319/mpage_1/tm.htm


~smile~

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Recently, there was a poster here who would enter threads and take positions that he was right and everyone else was wrong.  His presence on the thread would act like a gravitational pull, and people would argue with him instead of dealing with the topic at hand.

My hope is that by providing people with some historical background, they will get a good sense of your style of argument, so fewer threads will be derailed.

I wish you nothing but the best, but you might have noticed that Alpha didn't exactly lay out the red carpet for you when you announced your return.  These boards don't need someone else who hops from thread to thread, trying his best to be a timesink.  Please respect that.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to BLoved)
Profile   Post #: 337
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 6:59:54 PM   
BLoved


Posts: 642
Joined: 8/5/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet
quote:

ORIGINAL: BLoved
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet
~FR~  After the first page and a half, then I just had to quit.
...
lovingpet 

You jump to a lot of conclusions for having read so little.


If I am wrong, then feel free to say so.


I'd rather not be any more repetitive than necessary. I've provided directions to the answers, they require you read.

If you are unwilling to read the answers where I've placed them, I see no need to re-post them here. The choice is yours. Read them or don't.



_____________________________

When your bdsm paradigm makes love essential, expect some flack from those for whom love is anathema.

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 338
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 7:00:31 PM   
heartcream


Posts: 3044
Joined: 5/9/2007
From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy


quote:

ORIGINAL: heartcream


quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

He is what he is.


Yeah a legend. If he can find a woman who digs him that is a good thing, who knows more mysterious things have happened.


I'm kind of icky and some people like me. Or are they just humoring me?


This could be a good thread domi. Girls go for ick if it is not too pushy, pontificating, self-righteously morally superior and are too hard to read. You are a wee piggy but you have a certain freedom loving quality presenting yourself as you are, heck, take a look at your profile, chicks eat that shit up and you know it. As you said you are famous!

_____________________________

"Exaggerate the essential, leave the obvious vague." Vincent Van Gogh

I'd Rather Be With You

Every single line means something.
Jean-Michel Basquiat



(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 339
RE: A legend returns ... - 2/17/2010 7:05:49 PM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BLoved

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx
There's lots of people in monogomous relationships here.
There's lots who aren't interested in that, and just want to play.
I find it interesting that you've got both groups irritated at you already.


I find it curious that monogamous people would suggest that meaningless multiple sexual encounters with virtual strangers is a wise choice. To suggest that monogamy is just another flavour of ice cream is to suggest they are not very devoted to monogamy, nor that they have any real convictions regarding it.

I suspect they speak of tolerance because they have friends in the casual camp and to speak out against that choice would threaten their friendships.

I suffer no such conflict of interests.



Do you believe casual BDSM has to have a sexual aspect?


_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert


This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi


(in reply to BLoved)
Profile   Post #: 340
Page:   <<   < prev  15 16 [17] 18 19   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity >> RE: A legend returns ... Page: <<   < prev  15 16 [17] 18 19   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.125