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person v relationship - 2/19/2010 4:26:08 AM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline 		if you had to choose between 2 people , one that looks like the person that you want and another that doesn't have the appearance you like but can provide the relationship you want, what do you do.

sure there's always the answer keep looking, but you've been on cm for a decade and the searching is getting old

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all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become
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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 4:33:06 AM   
eyesopened


Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline 		Looks fade and cannot be relied upon.  Relationships endure.  I should think it'd be a no-brainer unless one is looking for scenery only.

If I had been on CM or any other site for a decade without finding what I was seeking, I would take a new inventory of myself and what it is that I had to offer.  I would take a new inventory of what I really needed.

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Proudly owned by InkedMaster. He is the one i obey, serve, honor and love.

No one is honored for what they've received. Honor is the reward for what has been given.

(in reply to osf)
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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 4:57:36 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

if you had to choose between 2 people , one that looks like the person that you want and another that doesn't have the appearance you like but can provide the relationship you want, what do you do.

sure there's always the answer keep looking, but you've been on cm for a decade and the searching is getting old


As always, it depends.

How off is the appearence from what I want? Is it something where they are drastically over/underweight but are working to correct the issue? Is a tiny thing like a mole? Are you thinking complete and utter turn-off or just... meh?

Personally, it all a person has going for them is that I think they are hot... then I'll fuck 'em. And that's about it. If a person wants the same X, Y and Z that I want in a relationship but there is no sexual chemistry than it doesn't matter. Sexual chemistry is a huge deal-breaker for me so without it, it's just not a relationship I want.

Now, sexual chemistry is complicated. A person can easily become more attractive to me by having a great personality, making me laugh, triggering my kinks, etc. But there are still things that turn me off and I just can't seem to rewire my brain around them.


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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to osf)
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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 5:37:25 AM   
afkarr


Posts: 328
Joined: 1/13/2010
Status: offline 		Appearance is merely the package the person comes in. So the real question is whether you want bright shiny wrapping paper to play with unitl it crumbles and tears and you're left with an empty box; or whether you a lasting present that happens to be wrapped in last weeks comics.............

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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 5:50:49 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: afkarr

Appearance is merely the package the person comes in. So the real question is whether you want bright shiny wrapping paper to play with unitl it crumbles and tears and you're left with an empty box; or whether you a lasting present that happens to be wrapped in last weeks comics.............


Appearance can also be a reflection of lifestyle. It's like looking at a person's hands to see if they are well-manicured and perfectly polished or if they are work-worn with calluses.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to afkarr)
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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 5:53:42 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		I've had the person in the past (20 year relatinship) and I've had the relationship. Both types proved to be unsatisfying.
Now I have both in one person and would never again settle for less.

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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 5:58:14 AM   
Kaiel


Posts: 748
Joined: 4/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

if you had to choose between 2 people , one that looks like the person that you want and another that doesn't have the appearance you like but can provide the relationship you want, what do you do.

sure there's always the answer keep looking, but you've been on cm for a decade and the searching is getting old


I would choose the person that offered the relationship that I desired...




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I keep My expectations and thread counts high- "catitude"

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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 6:04:31 AM   
antinomy


Posts: 124
Joined: 3/7/2008
Status: offline 		While it would be nice to find both in the same person, being presented with an either/or is pretty simple for me. While I don't know that I could be with someone I find UNattractive, I tend to find that the more I get to know a person that offers the things I am seeking, the more appealing he becomes to me. What I might not find attractive without those attributes becomes less and less of an issue, as I tend to see him through different eyes. It's like the things I like about his personality, philosophy, ethics, and beliefs all meld with his appearance, creating the complete 'package' that I find attractive. Whereas, if I don't like the stuff on the inside, does not matter how good looking he is, he could be my perfect "10" in the looks department, and I would pick the other guy every single time.

(in reply to Kaiel)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 6:35:23 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Neither, just like every other time you've presented a choice between two undesirable things. A fully actualized relationship with the right person or none. I'm not that desperate. I'd rather be by myself with a vibrator then in a relationship that is only half satisfying.

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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 6:39:49 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Neither, just like every other time you've presented a choice between two undesirable things. A fully actualized relationship with the right person or none. I'm not that desperate. I'd rather be by myself with a vibrator then in a relationship that is only half satisfying.


sans the vibrator, this slave agrees with DesFIP.

(in reply to DesFIP)
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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 7:08:52 AM   
fragilepieces


Posts: 416
Joined: 7/6/2008
Status: offline 		Kudos DesFip why settle even if it has been a decade or even a score.

(in reply to DesFIP)
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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 7:18:54 AM   
WestBaySlave


Posts: 501
Joined: 9/24/2008
Status: offline 		 I agree about not settling for less, even if it takes a while. That being said, looks very rank low in importance for me. I think a person with a great personality, a lot of charisma, and a high level of compatibility could win over a whole lot of fugly.

In fact, when I think of what turns me off in a picture, it's less the actual face than how a man presents himself. If he sends me a cock-shot first, or has a photo that makes him look like he was rushed out of bed after a hard night of drinking, then that loses points in a way that has little to do with the actual face attached to him.

< Message edited by WestBaySlave -- 2/19/2010 7:19:26 AM >

(in reply to fragilepieces)
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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 8:22:07 AM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Neither, just like every other time you've presented a choice between two undesirable things. A fully actualized relationship with the right person or none. I'm not that desperate. I'd rather be by myself with a vibrator then in a relationship that is only half satisfying.


sans the vibrator, this slave agrees with DesFIP.


With the vibrator, I agree with DesFIP and beth. 

Seriously, I found I was quite happy being single and did not need or even want a relationship.  Only when I met someone who was a great match in all areas did I consider being in a relationship again.


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Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 8:34:13 AM   
FelineFae


Posts: 7756
Joined: 1/23/2009
From: i do wander everywhere...
Status: offline 		~ fr ~

Bodies are just soul-wrappers. It's the inside that counts. So, i'll go for the relationship over the appearance.

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FelineFae
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Profile   Post #: 14
RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 9:24:48 AM   
OriginallyFromLA


Posts: 87
Joined: 2/10/2010
Status: offline 		Once again it takes the new guy with the out of the box approach to solve the riddle.

You take the girl that will satisfy the relationship and spring for augmentive sugurey and a health club membership.

Problem solved.

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We keep you alive to serve this ship. Row well, and live.-Quintas Arius

Love IS pain, Highness. Anyone that says different is selling something.-Dread Pirate Roberts

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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 9:53:24 AM   
DomMeinCT


Posts: 2355
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OriginallyFromLA

Once again it takes the new guy with the out of the box approach to solve the riddle.

You take the girl that will satisfy the relationship and spring for augmentive sugurey and a health club membership.

Problem solved.


Does she have a vibrator too? 

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The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
~ Carl Jung

(in reply to OriginallyFromLA)
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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 10:13:57 AM   
OriginallyFromLA


Posts: 87
Joined: 2/10/2010
Status: offline
quote:

Does she have a vibrator too? 


I thought that was standard issue for all women.

_____________________________

We keep you alive to serve this ship. Row well, and live.-Quintas Arius

Love IS pain, Highness. Anyone that says different is selling something.-Dread Pirate Roberts

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Profile   Post #: 17
RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 10:45:00 AM   
heartcream


Posts: 3044
Joined: 5/9/2007
From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
Status: offline 		I would not settle. Really, how would I feel if someone did the same for me,

"hc you are funny and sweet and nice and a hot tamale but I dont really dig your face/body/hair/eyes/whatever, I am willing to overlook that because what is inside of you makes up for it!"

I would want to stick my boot down his throat and leave it there. Please, dont do me any favors.

I would not want to do that to someone either. None of us is perfect and there is someone out there who would not feel like they are settling to be with someone another might feel that way about.

Inside/outside it allllll matters to me. I am not some Nazi bitch about the guy needs to have perfection because I sure as shootin dont. I need and desire someone who fits with me and vicey versala.

I would rather be alone otherwise and it is not bad being alone, I get to lavish all that love on myself.

_____________________________

"Exaggerate the essential, leave the obvious vague." Vincent Van Gogh

I'd Rather Be With You

Every single line means something.
Jean-Michel Basquiat



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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 10:59:32 AM   
PrincessDonna


Posts: 189
Joined: 7/7/2006
Status: offline 		I agree with it being ok to be single and  social and get to know a circle of different people better as opposed to chasing a dream that may never come true(was that 10 years?) and that "right" one may come along and you wont even think about relationship vs looks. Good Luck

(in reply to heartcream)
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RE: person v relationship - 2/19/2010 12:14:29 PM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

if you had to choose between 2 people , one that looks like the person that you want and another that doesn't have the appearance you like but can provide the relationship you want, what do you do.



Obvious answer... kidnap and brainwash the one that gets your bits wet!!!





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It's only kinky the first time!!!

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