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Domin8tingUrDrmz -> RE: If you told your slave (2/23/2010 3:52:42 PM)
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ORIGINAL: antinomy
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ORIGINAL: Domin8tingUrDrmz
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ORIGINAL: antinomy
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ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth
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Sigh... If I were in a restaurant with my two young children, I would not watch. I (and I suspect other parents too) would detain you - using as much force as the law would reasonably allow me to get away with and call the police. You and your sub would be arrested, prosecuted and your names put on the child protection register.
So lets hope your obedient sub never ever wants a job in teaching, childcare, medicine or countless other jobs for which registration on the CPR rules you out.
And who is saying this would be anywhere near children? Assumptions much?
Personally, I read the OP as if it were a regular restaurant. I mean, I have dined out many times in my 43 years, the majority were not kink friendly places (okay, NONE of them were). And unless they were bars, or attended late at night, there more often than not were children present. Lacking details, and being from the same country and state as the OP, my mind filled in the blanks with what would be the most oft found scenario. And, since the OP seems to go for the shock factor in his posts, I felt comfortable with that assumption. However, I agree that the circumstances of the dining experience COULD alter one's answer to the question. However, I'm wondering if this was not meant as a lesson in absolutes? The moral of the question being would a Dominant expect obedience regardless of the command, the circumstances, or the location it was given?
I'm replying mostly to the bolded portion.
Yes, I expect obedience no matter the location, or circumstances. However, I do not intend to put a submissive person in a position that would cause them harm or an arrest record. If such a command could cause harm or an arrest record, I would expect my sub to ask me if I were serious, or point out something I may have overlooked (which if I did overlook something I will likely consider this information and may change my order), and then proceed to follow the command if I ordered it anyway.
When I make commands, I have taken the time and forethought as to the possible outcomes and determined that the risk is low enough for the command to be executed with their well-being in mind. The submissive's 'job' in that situation is to trust that I have done my 'job' in that situation and do as told.
Regardless of the OP, who I happen to think is a raving loon, some of us do expect obedience.
This is probably going to get me tagged as pretty unsubly, but, I have to ask- you, and others that responded similarly...why? Why would you still expect obedience if you just said that you would not intend to put a submissive person in a position that would cause them harm or an arrest record? I get that the vast majority of people would NOT put their sub/slave into this situation. But, if they did, and they still expect obedience- it sort of baffles me. How could a submissive (or slave) trust the judgement of someone that would risk this? How do you even know your Dom has not lost their marbles? And, if the submissive is a parent, or holds a job that could be jeopardized? I'm really having a hard time wrapping my mind around this. I know the thread should have died a while back, but...this is where I have the problem. If someone expects absolute obedience, but acts irresponsibly, how can a sub or slave TRULY be expected to obey?
The thing is, antinomy, that as I mentioned above, I do not intend to put a submissive in harms way, and I do expect that if it is perceived to be harmful that submissive question the command. Since it is NOT my intention of putting a submissive in harms way, I do not make commands that would cause them harm. Period. Now, as I also stated previously in this thread, I'm NOT perfect (thankfully, I rather enjoy being human). So, if I overlooked something, and the prospect of harm was missed by my assessment, I would expect that the submissive alerted me to that danger.
I don't expect immediate trust, I expect trust to be built over time. I expect that once the trust is rendered the questions become fewer and further between. If however, I assess a situation incorrectly I'm willing to admit a mistake and reconsider the command. I don't go around asking submissives to streak naked in an elementary school, public playgrounds, or McDonald's. But, if I were in a nude-friendly restaurant (which some exist) I may well order them to strip, hop up on the table and become the instrument in which food is served. If we were in a nude-friendly restaurant, and no one has yet stripped, and they "thought" it was unwise, they could voice their concern. If I told them to do it anyway, I would expect they know me well enough to trust that it is OK.
Now, if some unforeseen mental illness struck, and my ability to assess a majority of situations properly deteriorated, then I would hope they still cared enough for me to get me some medical attention, while avoiding ridiculous commands such as streaking in an elementary school.
I think (reasonably sane) people who expect obedience also do not anticipate giving outlandish commands in the first place. I hope that helps you see this side of it more clearly. It is still up to the submissive to determine if that person is worthy of their trust in the first place, and it is still the responsibility of the dominant to show that they are capable of making decisions based on the well-being of all involved.
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