RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (Full Version)

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Lockit -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:08:05 PM)

Thepillowdreamer, it might be best to quit while your almost ahead. You are getting into some pretty deep subject matter and it can be difficult to take it lightly. Many of the things you list as basic symptoms could fit all sorts of things including mental or emotional disorders or illnesses, but not always. Then to think that people might need state appointed monitors is another touchy subject. Seriously so, for those of us dealing with anyone who does face challenges and their care. Often times the state will try to inject their will upon some of us taking care of someone and it isn't always the best thing for our loved one's. Such as in my son's case.

You seem like a great person and the posts I've read are wonderful and I am sure I will like you very much, but you are walking on thin ice with some of this. lol You will learn what gets people going and what to avoid unless you want to get them going. This subject is one of them for a number of people.

Just my advice here... relating to a thread I stared long ago and what I learned about what to say and not to! lol You get your ass kicked around a bit and you decide if you ever want it kicked again or not. lol



thepillowdreamer -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:09:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

Good job on the rewrite tpd.


thank you. i'm trying to work on the whole "hurting stranger's feelings because i'm dumb" thing.

... it's slow going.



camille65 -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:11:19 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: thepillowdreamer

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

Good job on the rewrite tpd.


thank you. i'm trying to work on the whole "hurting stranger's feelings because i'm dumb" thing.

... it's slow going.



What counts to me is that you recognized the problem and then took steps to fix it, not everyone can do that. You aren't dumb, you did however mangle your OP which led to some frustrations.

Eeeep I've just been ordered to bed, sorry. Gnites.



Smutmonger -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:11:34 PM)

Thinking itself can be painful to some,try not to let it bother you overly much.



came4U -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:12:23 PM)

pillow--- your origional posting:

quote:

i've noticed that a lot of members of collarme exhibit very clear signs of asperger's syndrome.

asperger's is a mild variant of autism, which is basically a social development disorder. some of the symptoms include:

obsession with one or two topics. true love, the perfect slave/dom, whatever. ... ~smiles~
paranoia and abominable victim complex.
self-obsession.
low self-esteem.
extreme terseness when communicating with others, along with difficulty communicating with others in general.
being so on the defensive that they are offensive.
flashes of irrational anger. (tantrums)

inability to engage in regular conversation: this goes back to the obsessions.
that's just the tip of the iceberg. head to google or open up a textbook if you want more info on the subject, but dang. i've been here for less than a week and this issue's been glaring at me since day one. these people aren't going to be fixed: medication helps, a lot, and will improve their quality of life, but i'd be shocked if anyone i'm thinking of would see a doctor for diagnosis.

it's one of those issues that everyone else but the victim sees, which is sad because they're going to stay miserable.

thoughts? am i alone in this?


besides, in general, isn't this list:

1. you have been here less than a week? and have the nerve to judge people?

2. and "ssue's been glaring at me since day one"? Maybe you are the mirror?

3.
quote:

these people aren't going to be fixed
uhh who are you to say?

4.
quote:

i've volunteered for these people and got to know them as people with severe disabilities
lol, there are people who get paid to diagnose others. YOU are not one of them to decide how/where/when or why they behave the way they do.

5.
quote:

what i'm wondering, though, is the possibility of people here with a degree of this that would require that they have a private or state-appointed helper
are you asking to be a paid 'helper' for this type of CM 'visitor'? Are you willing to volunteer then, if someone were to have this 'disability'

besides, isn't THIS list
quote:

this isn't all-encompassing, but some signs of this would be:

obsession with one or two topics. true love, the perfect slave/dom, whatever.
paranoia and abominable victim complex.
self-obsession.
low self-esteem.
extreme terseness when communicating with others, along with difficulty communicating with others in general.
being so on the defensive that they are offensive.
flashes of irrational anger. (tantrums)
inability to engage in regular conversation: this goes back to the obsessions


pretty well include almost EVERY HORNY PERSON WITH A CERTAIN KINK?

maybe a submissive, maybe a dominant, maybe someone who wants to pee on public statues?

who are you to diagnose, pfttt 'less than a week'.



juliaoceania -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:15:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: thepillowdreamer

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

Good job on the rewrite tpd.


thank you. i'm trying to work on the whole "hurting stranger's feelings because i'm dumb" thing.

... it's slow going.



Think about this, someone could attach a bunch of "symptoms" on to you for not understanding social cues of how your post could be offensive... would any of them be  justified in saying that you do not seem to understand social cues, lack empathy, etc etc?

My Daddy always says, think twice post once (not that I always have followed that)... sometimes we are guilty of the things we are projecting on to others...

Think about it.



thepillowdreamer -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:19:00 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit
Thepillowdreamer, it might be best to quit while your almost ahead. You are getting into some pretty deep subject matter and it can be difficult to take it lightly. Many of the things you list as basic symptoms could fit all sorts of things including mental or emotional disorders or illnesses, but not always. Then to think that people might need state appointed monitors is another touchy subject. Seriously so, for those of us dealing with anyone who does face challenges and their care. Often times the state will try to inject their will upon some of us taking care of someone and it isn't always the best thing for our loved one's. Such as in my son's case.

You seem like a great person and the posts I've read are wonderful and I am sure I will like you very much, but you are walking on thin ice with some of this. lol You will learn what gets people going and what to avoid unless you want to get them going. This subject is one of them for a number of people.

Just my advice here... relating to a thread I stared long ago and what I learned about what to say and not to! lol You get your ass kicked around a bit and you decide if you ever want it kicked again or not. lol


i'm gonna follow your advice, i think. thanks for being blunt about it, and thanks for the kind words. in case you haven't noticed, i'm slightly awkward. just a wee bit. i think i'm just gonna quit while i'm being lapped and stop visiting the forums.

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65
What counts to me is that you recognized the problem and then took steps to fix it, not everyone can do that. You aren't dumb, you did however mangle your OP which led to some frustrations.

Eeeep I've just been ordered to bed, sorry. Gnites.


'night, and thanks again for what you said earlier. you ladies are pretty rad.



RedMagic1 -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:19:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: thepillowdreamer
this isn't all-encompassing, but some signs of this would be:
  •  obsession with one or two topics. true love, the perfect slave/dom, whatever.
  •   paranoia and abominable victim complex.
  •   self-obsession.
  •   low self-esteem.
  •   extreme terseness when communicating with others, along with difficulty communicating with others in general.
  •   being so on the defensive that they are offensive.
  •   flashes of irrational anger. (tantrums)
  •   inability to engage in regular conversation: this goes back to the obsessions

Just from the sheer number of registered users, I'm sure some of the users of this site -- male and female -- have Asperger's that is more severe that Psykic's, say.  However, the signs you mention also have a simpler explanation.

Many people have a much looser social conscience when they are interacting on the internet, than in real life.  Beyond that, try to put yourself in the place of a man whose main internet interactions with women are pornographic.  Camgirls, sologirls, etc., who will do more or less whatever he says, when he says it.  It's easy to imagine that women on the internet -- especially ones with profiles proclaiming themselves to be kinky perves -- are all easy and loose.  So a guy writes you, tells you to kneel and suck, or whatever.  And you respond with "hell no."  Well, that's not supposed to happen.  It's not part of the formula, not how the game is played.  So you must be outside the game somehow -- fat, ugly or a bitch.  So he calls you that.  Because it can't possibly be his responsibility that he's not getting results.

That's a result of isolation due to cyber malsocialization, not any "syndrome."  My suggestion to you is: don't worry too much about the negative.  Lockit's advice to you on this thread is good, but I'm glad you're pressing ahead anyway.  People will flip out at you.  Oh well.  Concentrate on the people who are interacting with you as a human being.



thepillowdreamer -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:22:59 PM)

all i can say is that i'm sorry, and i really didn't intend on offending anybody. apparently i'm incapable of doing that. thanks for your patience to the people who gave constructive crit, and i guess i'll talk to you later someday.



came4U -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:23:24 PM)

quote:

came4U
oook, well, we can see that this is a personal problem.

oh goodies. So in the end this has nothing to do with your issues with CM 'people', it has more to do with the unresolved family problems that we are now burdened with?

gottcha.



PILLOW:
quote:

not at all. what i meant when i posted that is that the general consensus about people with down syndrome is that they're all the same. they're angelic tokens. i've noticed that a lot, and it's not true at all. people are people are people: we just come in different flavors and packaging, is all.

i don't like it when people assume that my cousin is like everyone else with down syndrome, and i didn't like when someone assumed that everyone with autism is the same, and i didn't like it when i unintentionally made the same foot-in-mouth insinuation. this is an open forum and i'm genuinely curious.


what you meant when you posted?

is what you said...did you think if we ignore it, it will be erased from the site and memory??

you said:
quote:

i've noticed that a lot of members of collarme exhibit very clear signs of asperger's syndrome.

asperger's is a mild variant of autism, which is basically a social development disorder. some of the symptoms include:

obsession with one or two topics. true love, the perfect slave/dom, whatever. ... ~smiles~
paranoia and abominable victim complex.
self-obsession.
low self-esteem.
extreme terseness when communicating with others, along with difficulty communicating with others in general.
being so on the defensive that they are offensive.
flashes of irrational anger. (tantrums)

inability to engage in regular conversation: this goes back to the obsessions.
that's just the tip of the iceberg. head to google or open up a textbook if you want more info on the subject, but dang. i've been here for less than a week and this issue's been glaring at me since day one. these people aren't going to be fixed: medication helps, a lot, and will improve their quality of life, but i'd be shocked if anyone i'm thinking of would see a doctor for diagnosis.

it's one of those issues that everyone else but the victim sees, which is sad because they're going to stay miserable.

thoughts? am i alone in this?


Why on earth would some of us need to 'google' for psychiatric information? Do you think (since being here for a week) that some of / most of/ us are dense and uneducated?

oh well, I suppose just as your 'volunteer' position has trained you in psychology, you can figure us out huh? Awe all my money spent for nottin', to be out-psyched by a volunteer [:(]









BLoved -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:26:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: thepillowdreamer
i'm referring to would be people who are undiagnosed, un-medicated, and not functioning at their full potential because of it - people on this site.

some signs of this would be:
  •  obsession with one or two topics. true love


~smile~

[sm=popcorn.gif]



Lockit -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:29:23 PM)

I wouldn't suggest leaving the forum's! No way! I think you will be an asset to them! We all can take a wrong turn and learn things around here. You are beating yourself up pretty hard and if you beat yourself up that way, you may tend to look at others with this same way of thinking. I would hate to see you run off! You are going to hear some harsh things as people feel you have been harsh and this will happen just about anywhere online. Take the good and leave the rest, learn, move on and join in again because believe me, you can turn this around, whatever happens and can have a great time here.



came4U -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:33:34 PM)

quote:

obsession with one or two topics. true love, the perfect slave/dom, whatever. ... ~smiles~
paranoia and abominable victim complex.
self-obsession.
low self-esteem.
extreme terseness when communicating with others, along with difficulty communicating with others in general.
being so on the defensive that they are offensive.
flashes of irrational anger. (tantrums)


ok, OP, that explains YOU so far.

sigh, I volunteer to diagnose you with asperger's.






juliaoceania -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:33:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: thepillowdreamer

all i can say is that i'm sorry, and i really didn't intend on offending anybody. apparently i'm incapable of doing that. thanks for your patience to the people who gave constructive crit, and i guess i'll talk to you later someday.



Please don't stop posting!


Just remember the reason people are sensitive about some things isn't because they are mental, it is because we all have cracks and that is what lets the light in....

You just let some light in... no big deal... if we are offended we can put on our big kids pants and deal with it...



camille65 -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:36:05 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U

quote:

obsession with one or two topics. true love, the perfect slave/dom, whatever. ... ~smiles~
paranoia and abominable victim complex.
self-obsession.
low self-esteem.
extreme terseness when communicating with others, along with difficulty communicating with others in general.
being so on the defensive that they are offensive.
flashes of irrational anger. (tantrums)


ok, OP, that explains YOU so far.

sigh, I volunteer to diagnose you with asperger's.







She apologized, she admitted that the OP was not well written or well thought out. She had no bad intentions but she screwed up a bit.

Why can't you let it go? How many times must she apologize? Nastiness sure isn't a helpful tool in learning how to craft a well written post.



DameBruschetta -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:36:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U

pillow--- your origional posting:

quote:

this isn't all-encompassing, but some signs of this would be:

obsession with one or two topics. true love, the perfect slave/dom, whatever.
paranoia and abominable victim complex.
self-obsession.
low self-esteem.
extreme terseness when communicating with others, along with difficulty communicating with others in general.
being so on the defensive that they are offensive.
flashes of irrational anger. (tantrums)
inability to engage in regular conversation: this goes back to the obsessions


pretty well include almost EVERY HORNY PERSON WITH A CERTAIN KINK?

maybe a submissive, maybe a dominant, maybe someone who wants to pee on public statues?

who are you to diagnose, pfttt 'less than a week'.


I've shortened the quote a bit, but this is exactly what I was thinking when I read the OP.  Its like taking one example of one experience and blanketing everything with it because you saw one thing that is similar. 

This was created to be a kinky personals site.  Um, yeah... a majority of people on here seem obsessed with finding X.  Seems logical to me that those kind of people would be here to me.  Self obssession exists, everywhere. Low self esteem... again, logical when you have people who may or may not be "persecuted" for their "unusual" interests.  Not exactly uncommon considering circumstances.  In regards to the normal conversations.. that's pretty relative I think.  Some people come on here not looking for normal conversation.  They want kink only.  I fail to see that as a symptom - its simple incompatibility of what one is seeking to gain from a particular conversation. All of these things are a result of the environment and the fact that gee... you are on the INTERNET. You have people who lie, lead you on, shit happens.  Trust gets lost, people get irritated over things.  Its life.

This is also.. the frigging internet.  A lot of people tend to let go of their inhibitions here, there is no face to face - just a screen.  There is much less of a reason to consider or contemplate what they should or shouldn't say.  No fist fights on the internet, no screaming, no physical out lash or job to loose (well usually).  If you step over a line and piss someone (or a large amount of people off) you just close the page and walk away.  Alienate people?  You're bound to find millions of other new people to talk to.  Odds are you might even find people who don't give a shit that you don't filter what you say because they think like you.  A large majority of people do not really think before they speak on the internet in my experience - it just spews out (word vomit anyone?)  The rules of "decent" behavior are a hell of a lot different online... if you haven't quite learned that yet perhaps you should take the time to do so now.  People aren't going to take the time to consider your feelings about their beliefs or your opinions of them on the net before they speak.  The internet is anyone and everyone's 27/7 virtual soapbox.  Kinda looks like you did just that here - just hey, that's just my point of view.

Did you really think you were going to tell a damn good amount of the members of CM that they had Asperger's and not have a bunch of people pissed off or insulted or NOT have this thread go in a negative direction? You have one experience with Aspergers.  One. None of the things you mention are things that are considered to be present in a majority of people with Asperger's.  (Beyond this "obsession" we have with finding a partner.  God, we romantics are all so fucked up aren't we?)  If you're going to label a ton of people, at least have your facts right.



RedMagic1 -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:36:58 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U
ok, OP, that explains YOU so far.

sigh, I volunteer to diagnose you with asperger's.

And I volunteer to diagnose you as an irrational bitch.

Seriously.  Stop being such a bulldog about this.  She's already apologized about 25 times.



Lockit -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:42:18 PM)

I remember back in the day... way back when, I was in my twenties. I read a book about the stages in life. In our twenties we want to put everything in it's place, figure it all out and make sense of it. I really do remember back then! It is five minutes ago or yesterday I might forget!

I remember wanting to understand everything around me and all those lil boxes I needed for just about everything. To the point of being pretty anal about some things. I made mistakes. I was harsh in judgment sometimes. Was I a bad person? No. Young and finding my way. Did I say and do stupid shit? Yes, I still do.

So why don't we give the young lady a break? She is sorry and I think has learned something here. Now do we want to crush her? Do we want to make her pay? Or would we as elder's in this thing called life, wish a bit of grace to and from a whole lot of people?



BLoved -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:43:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: came4U
quote:

obsession with one or two topics. true love, the perfect slave/dom, whatever. ... ~smiles~
paranoia and abominable victim complex.
self-obsession.
low self-esteem.
extreme terseness when communicating with others, along with difficulty communicating with others in general.
being so on the defensive that they are offensive.
flashes of irrational anger. (tantrums)


ok, OP, that explains YOU so far.

sigh, I volunteer to diagnose you with asperger's.


She's spelling it out for you.

This was targetted at moi.

She just happened to run afoul by picking a condition which several people have or know of.

I now return you to your regularly fouled-up troll thread ...

[sm=popcorn.gif]



juliaoceania -> RE: asperger's epidemic on collarme? (2/28/2010 8:46:19 PM)

quote:

I now return you to your regularly fouled-up troll thread ...


Where is the love Bob,

"Where Is The Love?"

What's wrong with the world, mama
People livin' like they ain't got no mamas
I think the whole world addicted to the drama
Only attracted to things that'll bring you trauma
Overseas, yeah, we try to stop terrorism
But we still got terrorists here livin'
In the USA, the big CIA
The Bloods and The Crips and the KKK
But if you only have love for your own race
Then you only leave space to discriminate
And to discriminate only generates hate
And when you hate then you're bound to get irate, yeah
Madness is what you demonstrate
And that's exactly how anger works and operates
Man, you gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love, y'all, y'all

People killin', people dyin'
Children hurt and you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek

Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love (Love)

Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love
The love, the love

It just ain't the same, always unchanged
New days are strange, is the world insane
If love and peace is so strong
Why are there pieces of love that don't belong
Nations droppin' bombs
Chemical gasses fillin' lungs of little ones
With ongoin' sufferin' as the youth die young
So ask yourself is the lovin' really gone
So I could ask myself really what is goin' wrong
In this world that we livin' in people keep on givin'
in
Makin' wrong decisions, only visions of them dividends
Not respectin' each other, deny thy brother
A war is goin' on but the reason's undercover
The truth is kept secret, it's swept under the rug
If you never know truth then you never know love
Where's the love, y'all, come on (I don't know)
Where's the truth, y'all, come on (I don't know)
Where's the love, y'all

People killin', people dyin'
Children hurt and you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek

Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love (Love)

Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love, the love, the love?

I feel the weight of the world on my shoulder
As I'm gettin' older, y'all, people gets colder
Most of us only care about money makin'
Selfishness got us followin' our wrong direction
Wrong information always shown by the media
Negative images is the main criteria
Infecting the young minds faster than bacteria
Kids wanna act like what they see in the cinema
Yo', whatever happened to the values of humanity
Whatever happened to the fairness in equality
Instead of spreading love we're spreading animosity
Lack of understanding, leading lives away from unity
That's the reason why sometimes I'm feelin' under
That's the reason why sometimes I'm feelin' down
There's no wonder why sometimes I'm feelin' under
Gotta keep my faith alive till love is found
Now ask yourself

Where is the love?
Where is the love?
Where is the love?
Where is the love?

Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love?

Sing wit me y'all:
One world, one world (We only got)
One world, one world (That's all we got)
One world, one world
And something's wrong wit it (Yeah)
Something's wrong wit it (Yeah)
Something's wrong wit the wo-wo-world, yeah
We only got
(One world, one world)
That's all we got
(One world, one world)



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