Your Hard limits are HOW Hard???

Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (Full Version)

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CERCKL -> Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 7:36:59 PM)
Thought...yes, they do happen, observations even...sometimes awareness but don't tell anyone but I digress... lotus has 2 Hard Limits I would never cross as two are moral/ethical for Me also and one, well, I just don't see anything erotic about it...but two of them had never actually been discussed and she perceived them as Hard Limits...hated them, never allowed them to be crossed and well...I took her flying past them at an intense rate...and didn't find out that she didn't go there until after the fact...I recognize that the primary reason they were Hard Limits were because of past emotional circumstances...yet when I asked her if she would prefer observing them as limits, she got quiet and said 'no'. How Hard are your limits? Would you ever consider being taken past them, as long as you didn't find them ethically wrong (no, I'm not speaking of other's 'ethics' here...)? See, I can be serious at times... C

yourMissTress -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 7:42:14 PM)
My hard limts are HARD. I only have 4 but they are staying right where they are until long after Hell freezes over and jessy is queen of the universe.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 7:43:21 PM)
My limits are limits (I don't distinguish between "soft" and "hard"). And that's why there are very few of them. Now, just because something isn't a limit doesn't mean I'm going to do it with YOU on some random night. I still have preferences.

CERCKL -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 7:47:31 PM)
quote: Now, just because something isn't a limit doesn't mean I'm going to do it with YOU on some random night. I still have preferences. In no way was this meant as an invite...laughing. I suppose I was wondering if a generic audience type of you, had been taken beyond where they thought they would ever go...limit-wise. ...also, re-read My own post, yes, that should be three hard limits, not two...I can add, really... C

ivorylace -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 7:49:52 PM)
I have four hard limits, and they are hard. I would never even consider wearig the collar of Any who wished to 'explore' them so I have no worries. ~ lace

CERCKL -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 7:50:11 PM)
quote: [My hard limts are HARD. I only have 4 but they are staying right where they are until long after Hell freezes over and jessy is queen of the universe. _____________________________ -Tress /quote] ...as intriguing as I have found You over the past few weeks of reading Your posts, I would probably be scared of what Your hard limits might be...especially after your 'nailing' post... Speaking of, wish I was down there, would be intrigued to observe...from a far distance. C

TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 7:59:41 PM)
To the OP..I have to say YES..hard limits are exactly that! Hard...A person comes up with Hard limits simply due to the fact that who else knows you and your experiences as well as YOU.Now personally unlike LA I do have soft limits as well..these limits to me mean that at this time and place for ME it is a limit but could be explored at a later time dependant on my choice of a Dominant and his limits,and the relationship we may or may not have....be well...tempting

IrishMist -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 7:59:59 PM)
quote: How Hard are your limits? Would you ever consider being taken past them, as long as you didn't find them ethically wrong Personally, I perfer to be pushed past limits just to see how far I actually can go. /shrug but that's just me

CERCKL -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:04:49 PM)
quote: To the OP..I have to say YES..hard limits are exactly that! Hard...A person comes up with Hard limits simply due to the fact that who else knows you and your experiences as well as YOU.Now personally unlike LA I do have soft limits as well..these limits to me mean that at this time and place for ME it is a limit but could be explored at a later time dependant on my choice of a Dominant and his limits,and the relationship we may or may not have....be well...tempting ...so, in actuality, I would expect the two 'hard' limits I took her beyond (and as stated in My original post, I didn't know of them...though I did of the other three and wouldn't want to explore them) they were actually 'soft' limits...or maybe 'medium' (smile) limits for her...because she didn't bring them up til a couple of days later... C

thetammyjo -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:07:23 PM)
What do you mean by "hard limit"? When I use the term it means "those things/situations/physical conditions" that cannot be done/changed. I think some limits can change, I know that Fox's have, with time and growing trust and self-knowledge. Others might change because we work on changing them. I also think that new limits can develop over time as we have more experiences -- if you didn't know about something or never tried something it might be very difficult to realize its a limit ahead of time. I think that limits reflect the individual and each relationship -- new relationship will probably have different limits. We as human being constantly change so obviously wouldn't our limits change? I don't think there is anything wrong with any limit -- hard or soft -- nor do I think having more or less limits are a sign of anything but a person's uniqueness. I do think that when a limit is pushed (on purpose or not) that the person pushing has a huge responsibility. You never know what might happen when you push that line -- could be good, could be bad, could be neutral. In my opinion, discussion of limits, especially after one is pushed, shouldn't happen until some time has passed and the reality of what has happened can be processed. I personaly prefer to discuss such matters in as neutral and authority-free way as possible. In my experience how a person reacts to a pushed limit can change from minute to minute, hour to hour and day to day. One needs time to process and just become I'm told one thing right afterwards doesn't mean I'll heard the same thing the next day nor that I will observe positive signs a few days later.

BitaTruble -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:13:58 PM)
My limitations are medical in nature. Until medical science comes up with a cure for that which ails me, those are set, can't be pushed and there's no point in even discussing them with Himself. My issues were made known to him before he collared me and he wanted and took me anyway, flaws and all. Celeste

justjill -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:14:01 PM)
To me a limit is a limit. Now when in the stage of getting to know each other I impose limits until mutual trust established but those are communicated seperately and I do not mind if my Master brings up my limits sometimes just as long as he is respectful and does not try to push me.

wardenswillow -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:19:24 PM)
Two of the four(that I can think of) hard limits are ethical. The other two are hard limits because one of them I find disgusting in my opinion(that's scat) the other is a limit placed on me by my Dom because of safety/health reasons and he has a point and that's blood. Those two I would not ever want to push past....no desire to whatsoever. I've had quite few soft limits and quite a few have been pushed past. One hard limit I had has now become a soft limit or as someone else said in another post maybe it's a medium limit cause I'm still not sure if I could push past it or not but I might would consider it. So my hard limits are truly hard limts. Edited by ModOne - Removed inappropriate content.

dorsaisgirl1 -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:20:15 PM)
from my expereince a hard limit for me is one that can not be crossed becouse crossing it would damage me ither emotionaly or physicaly. other people may have diferent cut of points.

catize -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:20:31 PM)
My limits are those activities which I know will cause me emotional or physical damage. These are immutable. There are other activities which may make me feel squirmy or I have never tried but as no harm will be incurred I am willing to be 'pushed' past them. I defined what I consider "harm" and discussed it thoroughly with DG before hand.

ravn -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:25:44 PM)
my personal hard limits are merely things that are physically impossible for me. I personally, cannot be hung by my toes from a rafter, as my breasts would suffocate me. That is a hard limit. but hey, i'll try anything twice!

ModeratorOne -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:28:47 PM)
Before this thread goes too far please remember that posting limits that discuss illegal activities are still violations of the guidelines. We have had similar threads pulled due to this. Please try and keep it clean. ModOne

champagnewishes -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:32:42 PM)
My hard limits might as well be called Fort Knox. They are not up for discussion, consideration, testing or pushing...period. I am up front about them from day one. I have found that anyone on the same page as i consider these hard limits as well so it never has been an issue. Everything else i have rated as to my level of current comfort with in a journal. (sounds anal i know) I initially started it at the request of my mentor to keep me focused on what areas i needed to work on, what areas i needed to be pushed etc. At times when i felt frustrated by my shortcomings, he would make me read it as a reminder of just how far i had come. Call it my "owner's manual"...LOL...any use other than it's intended purpose voids all warrenties.

Naryina -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 8:33:59 PM)
My hard limits are in place because of :health & saftey. Not only physically but emotionally. One of my hardest limits is Face slapping. ITs in place because of the abuse i went through. I tried working it through with my former Master, but it only ended up with me on the floor in the fetal position for hours because i wouldnt beable to bring myself back till i had ....... come out of the memories. the others are there also for ethical/moral reasons.

CERCKL -> RE: Your Hard limits are HOW Hard??? (3/29/2006 9:18:43 PM)
quote: Before this thread goes too far please remember that posting limits that discuss illegal activities are still violations of the guidelines. We have had similar threads pulled due to this. Please try and keep it clean. ModOne I would appreciate that also, I am interested in perspectives, experiences not details that would cause legal firestorms...and don't want to annoy our big brother(s)... Namaste, C

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