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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/30/2006 4:16:09 PM

SimplyV

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quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

some are overly persistant in making me feel like i should not exist due to my strong opinions. yes, i may be a little passionate about my opinions, but, shouldn't i be allowed to express them without someone berating me for them?

Umm.. no.. this is a public board. People have a right to their opinions as well. Even if that means they think you're wrong and set out to prove it.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/30/2006 4:19:13 PM

GoddessDustyGold

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greg2serve...do you want to learn or do you want to fool around online? If the former, you are in the right place. The forums are much better for learning and discussion. If the latter, I still don't think chatrooms are a good idea, but then I don't want any online relationships either, other than friends through the message boards.
So dive in...the water's fine, we don't bite (toomuch!) and before you know it, you'll be at a local munch and actually talking to people face to face!
Welcome to the boards.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/30/2006 4:19:18 PM

mnottertail

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NO,

While it is pleasant to bask in the sunshine--
In a free society, you may voice your opinions and others may voice theirs, even if that means that some of there opinions of your opinions are berations upon yours....

That is kinda how it works, you say something, they say something....

Strong opinions lead to strong counter opinions.

Ron.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/30/2006 4:39:22 PM

subrob1967

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1) Get out the silly chat rooms, and get into a local group, or munch
2) Please please please stop typing T/this crap, Do you shout your s/o's name and whisper you're own? N/no O/one W/will T/take Y/you S/serious if you keep typing like this.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/30/2006 4:47:59 PM

michaelGA

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I/isn't T/this F/form O/of T/typing J/just S/so A/annoying?

LOL

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/30/2006 6:53:48 PM

TemptingNviceSub

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Gotta go with 99.9% here,chatrooms tend to be somewhat shallow,and as you have observed, if you are not a fast typist a complete waste of time.The forums are a truly wonderful way of seeing how this "life" works and finding your niche in it.But if you are truly serious of this "life"..then it cannot stop here on the computer.You needs must get out into R/L as well....so my answer is Yes to CM and to R/L..leave no stone unturned....be well..tempting

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/30/2006 7:50:31 PM

Vancouver_cinful

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyV
Umm.. no.. this is a public board. People have a right to their opinions as well. Even if that means they think you're wrong and set out to prove it.

SimplyV is right...This is a smorgasbord full of opinions, attitudes, beliefs, and agendas. Some things are bound to leave a bad taste in your mouth...

But, what you learn from that is if you don't care for pesto sauce, or veggie lasagna, you can just leave it on your plate and go back for more of what you do want.

Cin <who personally craves any kind of olive, and detests liver...even if it is good for her.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/30/2006 9:09:37 PM

apb

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quote:

ORIGINAL: subrob1967

1) Get out the silly chat rooms, and get into a local group, or munch

Couldn't agree more ..... everyone I know in the lifestyle I met in real-time in our local club. The few times I have attempted to hook up with someone after "meeting" online (either here or in vanilla online forums) have been a disaster.

Having said that - I know several folks who met online and have great relationships. I guess it is the luck of the draw, just like real life.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 2:41:43 AM

fldrkhorse

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From: North Carolina
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The short answer is take the time to read the posts here. If you're intimidated by posting your questions, and believe me I can understand why, simply read and learn. If you have a question about a particular post, contact that person directly for clarification.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 2:16:33 PM

greg2serve

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This i can relate to. It's not easy, is it> They say "just be yourself" and just being yourself doesn't seem to cut it. It get frustrating and i'm just so confused as to what to do. Thank you.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 2:22:29 PM

AAkasha

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quote:

ORIGINAL: greg2serve

This i can relate to. It's not easy, is it> They say "just be yourself" and just being yourself doesn't seem to cut it. It get frustrating and i'm just so confused as to what to do. Thank you.

If you are looking for an "online domme" and an online domme only because you are married, too shy to do bdsm in person, afraid of women or a virgin and afraid to date, your chances are pretty slim you are going to meet someone online to dominate you to your heart's content.

The fantasy of woman appearing online and taking over your life or using you sexually for her pleasure are mostly that; a fantasy. Plenty will approach you and really start sounding great, but you will soon find out they want your money or they are a guy wacking off.

If you want to find a sincere, loving and passionate relationship online with a femdom be prepared to spend hours and hours and hours and hours in a chatroom (nightly) to get to know the regulars.

Akasha

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 2:25:04 PM

greg2serve

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enslavegirl, it's much easier for a female submissive. Not to seem like a kow-it-all, but as i see it in the chat rooms, the Dom/sub female relationships are entirely different from the Domme/submale relationships of which i see very few. Doms can make advances and not get bashed. Sub females can do the same and it works for them. i have found that most sub females cannot possibly relate to a sub male. i have good ears and i listen to a lot of them and i see a lot. That's one of my many issues concerning double standards. Then too, i am always trying to learn. Maybe that's the problem, come to think of it. i see Dommes connecting with sub males who ....well, it makes me wonder what they have that i don't. Not that i'm Brad Pitt and know everything there is to know about the BDSM world.
I'm happy for you though. Best wishes and thanks so much.
greg~

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 2:27:50 PM

greg2serve

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Well, that answers the question....thank You very much. Looks like things are just what i imagined so why waste my valuable time? Thank You so much.

And another sub bites the dust......SIGH.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 2:30:24 PM

candystripper

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quote:

ORIGINAL: subrob1967

1) Get out the silly chat rooms, and get into a local group, or munch
2) Please please please stop typing T/this crap, Do you shout your s/o's name and whisper you're own? N/no O/one W/will T/take Y/you S/serious if you keep typing like this.

Quit picking on T/those of U/us W/who type that way.

candystripper

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 2:30:52 PM

PrinceSitri

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Joined: 3/28/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

I/isn't T/this F/form O/of T/typing J/just S/so A/annoying?

LOL

Yes it is, but I can live with it.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 2:33:26 PM

candystripper

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greg2serve, chat rooms are soley for fun, not hooking up...IMO. Spend time there, if ya want, but don't think of it as "searching"; "searching" is using the Home Page and writing delicious letters to Dommes with a great profile to back it up.

IMO.

candystripper

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 2:37:31 PM

PrinceSitri

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quote:

ORIGINAL: greg2serve

i am a submissive male who is new to collarme. No disrespect intended, but is it worth my time to search for an online D/s relationship?

Yes it is; it's how I met my own partner (actually via IRC rather than this kind of site, so I have evidence that chat can work that kind of magic). I think the important thing is just to join in, enjoy yourself and not make findding a partner your sole raison d'être.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 2:56:36 PM

SirKenin

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From: Barrie, ON Canada
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quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

i've been here for quite a while now and i have made a few friends and even more enemies with my opinions and comments so, any advice i could give you would be ripped apart like a shark frenzy by alot of people here...so i digress.

Then why even post that nonsense to begin with? So someone will feel sorry for you? You have not made any enemies. You have people that are blocking you because they got sick of listening to the same old "woe is me" over and over again, but nobody "hates" you. Actually it surprises Me how well you are tolerated. You should be thankful and not insult people that were doing their best to get along with you.

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 3:01:07 PM

SirKenin

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quote:

ORIGINAL: greg2serve

i am a submissive male who is new to collarme. No disrespect intended, but is it worth my time to search for an online D/s relationship? i have been in the chat room (lobby) and it seems like E/everyone knows E/everyone and when a newbie comes in, it seems like there are cold shoulders everywhere.i realize the fact that the BDSM crowd is tough, but there are some of us who have a sincere desire to learn.
i see so many double standards and i am never sure as to how to approach things in a chat rom. Sit there bored to no end? Chance saying something that may be misunderstood? Honestly, i wish i was a Dom. i watch the female subs banter with the Doms and T/they really have those nice D/s relationships. Sub females love to be loved and i really enjoy hanging around with them. Naturally, shortly after i am attracted to one, i find out she is already involved with someone.

There is just so much i do not understand and am afraid to ask. i think i can safely say that i never understood Dommes and never will. One time a Domme in a chat room told me "Don't even try to understand us because we don't even understand ourselves". i just thought i would toss this out there in case anyone has advice, opinions and suggestions. Many thanks.
~greg~

I ran a chatroom for two and a half years. Allow Me to let you in on a little secret. People are there because they have issues. They might pretend they do not. They might tell you they do not. They might hide it quite well. But they all have issues. All of them have baggage of some sort. It will eventually come to light. Is that what you want for yourself? If so, you will have to be persistent to break into the little cliques.

Like others have said, I recommend the forums as well. It is a good place to exchange ideas and people will get a chance to know you for who you are, sooner or later, for better or worse. Get a good profile happening and jump in. I also would not come with the goal of meeting up with someone. You are setting yourself up for failure. Just come to converse and let the chips fall where they may. It is when you are not looking that someone comes knocking at your door, trust Me.

< Message edited by SirKenin -- 3/31/2006 3:02:05 PM >

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RE: Some advice please. Please. - 3/31/2006 3:12:27 PM

SimplyV

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SirKenin

I ran a chatroom for two and a half years. Allow Me to let you in on a little secret. People are there because they have issues. They might pretend they do not. They might tell you they do not. They might hide it quite well. But they all have issues. All of them have baggage of some sort. It will eventually come to light. Is that what you want for yourself? If so, you will have to be persistent to break into the little cliques.

Umm.. Are you trying to .. Umm ...say.. that .. We don't have baggage on the forums? If so, what posts have you been reading and who is your optometrist cuz I want those kind of glasses too.

Personally, I think everyone has baggage. Whether or not, you can function as a human being with your baggage or not.. well.. that differs from person to person.

I think there are a lot more "players" and "fakers" and "wannabes" in chat since its less substance and thus easier to "fake". Where as here, you kinda have to know what you're talking about or others will see right through you.

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