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This is poetic, intelligent and deep. It's pin point accurate. I love the accountability you assign yourself. Your message is wonderfully illustrated, I cannot help but feel these sentiments ring true in me, too.

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ORIGINAL: Malkinius

{fast reply}

Greetings all....

I have both offered references to and received references from people I have worked with. I have also told them that if they want to know about me, search out my posts here and elsewhere. Google is your friend for finding out about people and it is free. I have used it with potentials before and will again.

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If someone has a history that can be independently checked, I think that should be considered a good thing. Reading what they have written and what others say about them and their writing at the time will say a lot about someone.

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The same thing is true if you look at someone's My Space or Facebook pages or any other online profile they may have. Yes, meeting people offline that you have only met online is a risk. It is a risk that can be mitigated to some extent. The more open and available information about someone I think the safer they are likely to be. The less you can find the less safe. I am advising a girl right now who's Master does not release almost any information about him self and berates and punishes her if she asks for anything. Yes, major red flags all over the place. She is new and has met him a few times offline and no damage yet but is this what someone wants in an owner? The other direction is that someone can give too much information. <grins> That doesn't mean they are safe but if it checks out at least you know whether or not they are worth continuing to work with.

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Over all...I think references are a good thing and that is true in both directions. Being safe in meeting someone for the first time is also a very good idea. Trust....but verify.

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ORIGINAL: GreedyTop
This is chancy, since if someone has a name that is shared with ANYONE else, you  may not be getting the right info.  For instance, whenI google my own name, I get hits for at least 4 other women with the same name.

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References are only as good as the amount of trust you give the source.  And who is going to refer you to a person (or site) that reflects them negatively?

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ORIGINAL: sweetboundesire

While trusting you judgment is good, I would also advise the same as Malkinius, do a google search. Here in Wisconsin, we have free circuit court access. I've looked up every Dom from Wisconsin I've ever met, on it. I've found it a good idea vanilla or otherwise, to do this when going on a date. Their are compulsive liars. The internet is your friend.