RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (Full Version)

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DickSteel -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/2/2010 11:03:58 AM)

What is someone wanted the catfuck slapped out of them?

You may be "caring and giving" but you seem K9 biased you prejudice bastard... if PETA ever found out.




lally2 -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/2/2010 1:34:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RCdc

I take it you have never breast fed then?  I never breast fed and yet, I didn't have to be shown.
.the.dark.


dark im happy for you - but ask any maternity nurse about new mothers trying to get their newborns to latch on and its often a period of frustration and tears for a great many.  i was talking to a maternity nurse only the other day who often let the new mums give a bottle just out of shere exhaustion and failure.  she herself had four kids and couldnt breast feed any of them - so good for you - really, but youre not in the majority.

oh, and ive just seen your somewhat patronising question - yes i breast fed for 6 months - in the ward i was in the number of times i heard mums beg to give a bottle because theyre baby hadnt fed since birth and they were told 'no - keep trying' - why would you assume that id make a statement like that if i couldnt back it up, shrugs.




RCdc -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/2/2010 5:07:16 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2
oh, and ive just seen your somewhat patronising question - yes i breast fed for 6 months - in the ward i was in the number of times i heard mums beg to give a bottle because theyre baby hadnt fed since birth and they were told 'no - keep trying' - why would you assume that id make a statement like that if i couldnt back it up, shrugs.


No more patronizing to the vast amounts of women whom you totally dismissed when you said -
quote:

but like no woman knows how to breast feed a baby and has to be shown


That was patronising and generalistic.  I never once said you couldn't back up your claims for yourself but you spoke for ALL women and it just wasn't the truth.  I was damn blessed that my children latched on and I damn well know that no all do or even can - but I never told the lie, you did.  To say that NO woman knows how to, is a misrepresentation.
quote:

she herself had four kids and couldnt breast feed any of them - so good for you - really, but youre not in the majority.

I never claimed I was in the majority.  I just gave you an example of your gross exaggeration.  Unless we are only supposed to take your 'experiences' above anothers.
And I don't need to make little patronizing shrugs to get my experience across either.

The fact is that for some women, breastfeeding comes cool, others it doesn't.  For some women, it's submission.  For some, it's learning french.  But if you can't do either, or you are coming up against the same issues over and over - like bumping into misogynistic men and seeing them as an issue, there is always a common denominator.

the.dark.




jbcurious -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/2/2010 6:05:31 PM)

I'm really amazed that you Doms/Masters are sticking up for idiots that are running off your potential subs/slaves. I've heard more than one complaint from you that there aren't enough subs/slaves, yet you protect the guys who are contributing to that?

It seems that when new blood hits the site the idiots make an all out blitz. After 2 days I was ready to hang it up, not the lifestyle... but the site.

2 things kept me on... A good friend recommended it and I came across a profile I liked and contacted him. It didn't work out... but it kept me on the site long enough to get involved in the Forums and to meet some very cool people and after the first few days the quality of Doms contacting me improved as well.

I'm fairly tenatious... if I was ready to leave this site after 2 days, imagine how many younger or shyer women have walked away.





VaguelyCurious -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/2/2010 6:22:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jbcurious

I'm really amazed that you Doms/Masters are sticking up for idiots that are running off your potential subs/slaves. I've heard more than one complaint from you that there aren't enough subs/slaves, yet you protect the guys who are contributing to that



Perhaps it's less protection than frustration? Nobody is denying that there are some guys on this site that are misogynistic-but those guys aren't holding a gun to anyone's heads-it's entirely your decision who you submit to, and it's frustrating when subs don't seem to have the critical faculties to tell the nutters from the Doms who could give them a positive experience.

It's easy to blame misogynistic guys for putting girls off, or for damaging them, as the OP did, but it's still the choice of the sub to get involved.

No?




jbcurious -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/2/2010 6:38:41 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

Perhaps it's less protection than frustration? Nobody is denying that there are some guys on this site that are misogynistic-but those guys aren't holding a gun to anyone's heads-it's entirely your decision who you submit to, and it's frustrating when subs don't seem to have the critical faculties to tell the nutters from the Doms who could give them a positive experience.

It's easy to blame misogynistic guys for putting girls off, or for damaging them, as the OP did, but it's still the choice of the sub to get involved.

No?



Absolutly... If they carry on conversation and actually meet them... but I would be more concerned with subs being driven off thinking there were nothing but wankers here before they had the opportunity to speak with someone genuine.




DesFIP -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 9:42:26 AM)

I'm curious about anybody who meets only people of one kind. If the op only meets misogynists, I have to assume she selects them from her email. And that the nice polite guys she's overlooking since they aren't saying 'kneel bitch'. If so, then the fact that these are the kind of men who initially attract her is an issue she needs to address in a more proper place. Because you can learn to like people who aren't like the people you've known in the past. And if the people you've had relationships with in the past are all like this, then you need to learn to like healthier people.




Andalusite -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 10:06:29 AM)

jbcurious, I agree with you that if I'd only had those "on your knees bitch" type e-mails here when I was looking, I probably would have become discouraged and sought out another site (or found someone through one of my vanilla hobbies/interests). I think that a lot of it is controlled by the woman's profiles and photos and general approach though. I don't recall *any* blatantly misogynistic e-mails, there were some "I'll submit to you only because you're female" ones from some of the local submissives, and some verbal-humiliation forced femme ones that came the closest to that. Almost all of the men I spoke with via e-mail were gentlemanly, polite, intelligent, and interesting. I met over a dozen guys during those few months, and didn't have to deal with a single fake or flake, but a couple did slip past my screening and say things that I felt were out of line. I just told them no, and moved on. [:D] To a large extent, I think we get what we're asking for, not necessarily what we deserve. [;)] When a new person comes here, they may not be aware enough of how they are coming across to make her profile attractive to the men she wants, and put off (without being negative) the ones she doesn't.




BoiJen -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 10:20:36 AM)

FR: It's because "submissive" women don't like nice guys. Nice guys are often quiet and not demanding (they may be firm in their rules, however) and don't fit the bill of what these women view as "Dominant". It's not on these guys to change who they are...it's on the women to figure out where they fucked up in choosing their partners.

It's the same thing as a s-type male who sees his fantasy as what ever D-type woman should be dieing to fulfill. It comes across and entitlement from them. In s-type women, their fantasy of strong, demanding D-type male turns into "biggest abusive asshole in the universe". And that's on the s-type women. Not the D-type men. The chicks who get into this type of situations repeatedly are the ones who fucked up. Just because a person is a s-type doesn't mean they have no personal responsibility in choosing their partners.

Now go somewhere else and start putting responsibility off on the wrong person there. Not many people here are gonna buy it.

boi

Who doesn't like it when people encourage others to abdicate personal responsibility.




RedMagic1 -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 11:08:35 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jbcurious
I'm really amazed that you Doms/Masters are sticking up for idiots that are running off your potential subs/slaves. I've heard more than one complaint from you that there aren't enough subs/slaves, yet you protect the guys who are contributing to that?

I've never made that complaint -- because it's false.  There are more sub women in the world than dom men.  Do you have any idea how many sub women there are on "vanilla" sites?  Yum.

Let's get real here.  I'm 41.  If I'm turning down sex with a 24-year-old (as I recently posted on another thread), it's not as though I've got no opportunities here.  There's exactly one reason I'd be interested in a woman in her forties: her wisdom.  What else is she going to entice me with?  The opportunity to deflower her?  If she has so little self-understanding that she allows nasty emails from perfect strangers to affect her life, then I sure as hell don't want to date her.  And, for the record, my most recent relationship was with a 44-year-old.

Who would you rather be courting?  The man who gets IMed by multiple women, and chooses to prioritize you because you're the coolest thing he's seen in a long time; or the man who pursues you because you're the only woman who writes him back?  If you're searching for something special and rare, you have to put in some real effort.  Believe me, other women are, whether you decide to or not.




jbcurious -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 12:02:30 PM)

Boijen & RedMagic... I don't believe my profile depicts "victim" in any way, in fact I worried that maybe I come across as too independent and strong, but was reassured by a couple of Doms, that I respect on the forums, that my profile is very much what they look for.

In real life I've been told on more then one occasion that I can be intimidating to some men. I don't back down or tolerate disrespect and my use of words in a debate or argument are logical rather than emotional.

Online I delete or flame depending on my mood and the initial message...I don't engage with fakes, idiots or wannabes... but have had some great conversations with some very cool people.

I'm no timid flower and while I have very little experience in BDSM...I still have 50 years of life experience that has instilled a great deal of confidence in who I am.

In the forums I have tread carefully, because I think it's good manners not to barge into any social circle.





RedMagic1 -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 12:16:04 PM)

I hope you understand I am commenting on the words I have quoted from your posts, and am not attacking you personally.  I haven't viewed your profile, and don't know who you are, not really.  However, my experience has been consistent with boijen's: women who talk in ways that are similar to your posts, tend to repeatdate assholes instead of doms who look out for the best of the relationship. 

I don't consider cybertrolls or cut-and-paste emailers to be a problem.  I rather like them.  They make it that much easier for me to stand out.  I'm in no hurry to campaign to throw them off the site.  Honestly, if a man writes you with such an attitude, I would consider that a red flag.

I believe there's no substitute for 100% ownership of personal responsibility for success and failure of dating and relationships.  Please take that perspective for whatever you think it's worth, and good luck to you.




jbcurious -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 12:53:19 PM)

The person you see in my posts is someone who is not afraid to admit to her lack of knowledge regarding all things BDSM. Who is coming into this with nothing but but sterotypes and a brief exposure to a group of people seemingly intent on upstageing or out Domming the rest, nothing seemed genuine rather meant to impress.

I've looked at the forums as a learning opportunity and while I may be naive in matters of BDSM...please don't assume that carries over into the rest of my life.




domiguy -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 12:56:29 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: jbcurious

The person you see in my posts is someone who is not afraid to admit to her lack of knowledge regarding all things BDSM. Who is coming into this with nothing but but sterotypes and a brief exposure to a group of people seemingly intent on upstageing or out Domming the rest, nothing seemed genuine rather meant to impress.

I've looked at the forums as a learning opportunity and while I may be naive in matters of BDSM...please don't assume that carries over into the rest of my life.


All you need to do is find the right mentor. I will save you.

Take that fucking thing away from your face you dumb cunt.




BoiJen -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 1:04:49 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy
Take that fucking thing away from your face you dumb cunt.


Awww....Domi you're in love aren't you?




jbcurious -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 1:23:32 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

All you need to do is find the right mentor. I will save you.

Take that fucking thing away from your face you dumb cunt.


What a lovely offer, can I get back to you on that?

My orifices are not for public viewing... I thought you all were into the whole mask thing? [;)]




domiguy -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 1:30:52 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: BoiJen

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy
Take that fucking thing away from your face you dumb cunt.


Awww....Domi you're in love aren't you?



Awww shucks boi, just don't want to have her think that I am one of those horrid mysogynists.

I would really like to fuck the snot out of you. Does kitty lend your dumb nice white ass out?....lol.


"misogyny and ivory live together in perfect harmony, I'd like some pizza a blowjob then you get up and turn off my tv....




BoiJen -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 1:47:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

Awww shucks boi, just don't want to have her think that I am one of those horrid mysogynists.

I would really like to fuck the snot out of you. Does kitty lend your dumb nice white ass out?....lol.


"misogyny and ivory live together in perfect harmony, I'd like some pizza a blowjob then you get up and turn off my tv....



Mr. Domi-man,

You just want my ass because I know you so well and you think if you could your penis in my mouth, I'd stop telling your secrets.

There's a very high price for renting the boi....Ma'am suggests taking out a second mortgage because of what your plans may entail.

Always happy to give a break down of costs upon requests,

boi




Level -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 2:19:35 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2
a Natural History programme a while back.  little baby penguins were trying to get out to sea through the melt-ice to feed, some made it, some got eaten by leopard seals - (laughing at self, not penguins) - slightly over the top, but that is how it feels for some people trying to get through the maze of varying people, types, agendas and personal priorities.  its a jungle out there for clueless newbies.


[image]http://i.ytimg.com/vi/W6wYy-YBkE0/0.jpg[/image]

Oowrr! Oowrr! Oowrr!

*leopard seal talk for "come here little girl, I want to eat you"*




Level -> RE: Misogynistic men who think they are dominants (4/3/2010 2:35:32 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: jbcurious

I'm really amazed that you Doms/Masters are sticking up for idiots that are running off your potential subs/slaves. I've heard more than one complaint from you that there aren't enough subs/slaves, yet you protect the guys who are contributing to that?


jb, it is probably less a matter of "sticking up for" than "what are you going to do?".

I don't like mosquitos, but there are a alot of them, and they aren't going anywhere any time soon.

And no, I don't think it unreasonable for newbies to show a little common sense, as well. Going to meet up with someone that wants to tie you up, and whip you? Proceed with caution! I don't say this as a way of putting it all on the newbie, being new isn't a license for some jackass to go postal on them.




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