RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner?

RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (Full Version)

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realtime62 -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 10:06:52 AM)
Well, if you've given up your power and have made yourself completely vulnerable to someone you know is a sadist...that can be scary. Even if you trust them 100%, they're still a sadist who is planning to use that power to torment. Super fun, fulfilling, awesome torment, but it can still be scary. quote: ORIGINAL: lally2 i dont understand how you can feel fear when you trust someone. maybe someone might explain that. i mean ive felt knotted in my tummy, my hands have gone clammy once or twice and ive felt some moments of definite anxiety, but i dont ever remember feeling genuine fear.

littleone35 -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 10:13:27 AM)
I don't fear my Master. If i feared him i don't think i would be in love with him. I am talking about all the different kinds of fear that was discussed already, i feel none of that. I anticpate what he is gong to do to me , but fear it no i think antcipation is better anway (at leat to me it is). I don't fear his power over me it is whst i crave so it does not iuve me the "chills" for lack of a better word. When he makes me shiver it is for another reason not cause he scares me. He has told me would do if anyone hurt me and i said Master you can be a scary guy. Since it is not directed at me i hace no fear. I trust him totally wth my heart and life. Matt's littleone

Smutmonger -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 10:24:10 AM)
Fear of just how close to the edge he can really get-and not break you permanently. And knowing he will.

UniqueRaven -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 10:40:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Smutmonger Fear of just how close to the edge he can really get-and not break you permanently. And knowing he will. This is getting much closer to what i've tried to express. It's the fear of his power - and it's wonderful. Thank you.

LadyNTrainer -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 11:13:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OrpheusAgonistes That's a very hot dynamic. It's absolutely possible to psych yourself in a sense of real fear and trembling with the right threats and props, particularly if your partner is completely committed to selling the scene. Even smart and intuitive people can get (allow themselves to get) overwhelmed and disoriented enough by a predicament that, even though nobody ever lost control, it still feels like a "What did I get myself into?" moment. On my end, I wouldn't describe it as selling so much as dropping the civilized mask and letting the beast that lives behind my eyes peek out just a little. I'm a rational, well functioning member of society, and I'm not actually going to maim or kill my partners. Not only do you not get to play with them again if you do that, the government gets quite annoyed if you slaughter and butcher its taxpayers, and there are unpleasant consequences. But there's also enough wiring broken or missing in my brain that I could in fact torture or kill without batting an eyelash if for some reason it was rational and logical for me to do so. I can't see any circumstances under which it would be, other than extreme self defense. The notion of butchering a person like a deer doesn't disturb me in the least, and at times it's quite attractive. What stops me is not emotional inhibition - I don't seem to have any in that respect - but reason. Also a protective instinct towards someone I identify as mate rather than prey, though during this kind of play the boundaries can blur some. I have one submissive who is fearless enough to be mate to the dominant primordial beast behind my eyes, and as a result I don't view him as prey at all any more. The other is utterly fascinated by the predator he sees in me, and he enjoys being prey. I've warned him that there's some buttons he shouldn't push too hard if he doesn't want to be missing some blood by the end of our session, and that's not a metaphor. He trusts me absolutely, and for the most part I trust myself, but there are times I put the knife down and walk away. Not because I lose interest, but because the lines have blurred too far and I am much too interested. And that's why people think I'm scary. His enjoyment of real fear is sexy enough that I'm willing to keep skirting the line and letting the beast out to play in calculated measure.

jbcurious -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 11:23:58 AM)
Well you definitely scare the crap out of me... and not in a good way.

lally2 -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 11:41:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jbcurious Well you definitely scare the crap out of me... and not in a good way. i was mesermerised by what he was saying and my mind was tumbling around with how that would make me feel and im thinking phuck - and then i read youre post and i just roared out laughing!! the comic timing was brilliant (but maybe you had to be in my head at the time)

jbcurious -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 11:45:21 AM)
No.. I see the humour [;)] Strange how things effect people differently... You have intrigue and I have Monty Python... (runaway, runaway)

lally2 -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 11:48:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: barelynangel I love power in a Man, power that just comes from him simply from his core of who he is. I want to be close to it but i also am usually somewhat intimidated by him because of it. I love and need a little fear of him, not because i am afraid of him but because i fear the power he has over me and what it does to me. The out of control feeling these types of Men are capable of drawing from me, the helplessness and vulnerability they also can compel. Its sort of i seek protection concept from the one i need protecting from lol. Anyway, i think fear is the right word for some of it because many times my fear of Men like tis is sorta fear of what i am capable of in terms of my reactions to men who have that power essence. Most men to me don't have that essence. So when i encounter it, yes, i fear that sort of Man in the most delicious way. angel angel i love everything you write - and you wrote this in a way i can totally understand. im going through something at the moment, a need to push myself out of this 'blurghby' feeling and into something slightly more edgy. so im meeting a guy in a wood after dark under a full moon and when i think about it now im getting butterflies though it isnt for another month. being alone in a wood with a big bloke who has designs on me is getting me to the feelings youre describing there. i know ill be 100% safe with him, i know that, but yes, that power and the mind behind it - its delicious but i can well imagine how ill be feeling while im waiting for him to turn up and when he turns up.

lally2 -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 11:54:33 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jbcurious No.. I see the humour [;)] Strange how things effect people differently... You have intrigue and I have Monty Python... (runaway, runaway) 'come back you coward! - come back i say' [:D] i suppose i am intreagued by that - its fun when we get folks like LadynTrainer there expressing the darker side of who they are - makes you realise youre sharing the room with a load of scary fuckers - who knew![:D]

jbcurious -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 11:55:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: barelynangel I love power in a Man, power that just comes from him simply from his core of who he is. I want to be close to it but i also am usually somewhat intimidated by him because of it. I love and need a little fear of him, not because i am afraid of him but because i fear the power he has over me and what it does to me. The out of control feeling these types of Men are capable of drawing from me, the helplessness and vulnerability they also can compel. Its sort of i seek protection concept from the one i need protecting from lol. Anyway, i think fear is the right word for some of it because many times my fear of Men like tis is sorta fear of what i am capable of in terms of my reactions to men who have that power essence. Most men to me don't have that essence. So when i encounter it, yes, i fear that sort of Man in the most delicious way. angel I totally get this... but haven´t got to the point of finding it "delicious"... knowing how far I could and probably would go with the wrong (right) man... scares the hell out of me.

sirsholly -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 12:03:31 PM)
i do not fear the ocean...if i did, i would have no business being there. But i certainly have a healthy respect for it, mostly because it is unpredictable. it is the same in a D/s relationship. If there is fear, i do not belong there. But i certainly have a healthy respect for the Dom.

UniqueRaven -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 1:14:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: barelynangel I love power in a Man, power that just comes from him simply from his core of who he is. I want to be close to it but i also am usually somewhat intimidated by him because of it. I love and need a little fear of him, not because i am afraid of him but because i fear the power he has over me and what it does to me. The out of control feeling these types of Men are capable of drawing from me, the helplessness and vulnerability they also can compel. Its sort of i seek protection concept from the one i need protecting from lol. Anyway, i think fear is the right word for some of it because many times my fear of Men like tis is sorta fear of what i am capable of in terms of my reactions to men who have that power essence. Most men to me don't have that essence. So when i encounter it, yes, i fear that sort of Man in the most delicious way. angel Angel, i missed your post somehow - this is exactly what i was trying to share - thank you for saying it so much better than me! [:)]

windchymes -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 1:15:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lally2 whats lefse? - and im with you on what you said i dont understand how you can feel fear when you trust someone. maybe someone might explain that. i mean ive felt knotted in my tummy, my hands have gone clammy once or twice and ive felt some moments of definite anxiety, but i dont ever remember feeling genuine fear. lally, lefse is a Norwegian delicacy, sort of a flour tortilla-like thing made from a dough whose main ingredient is mashed potatoes. No matter what you do to the recipe, or which recipe you use, it will give you grief, lol. I declared it evil back over the holidays. But we still laugh about it. Like you, I have never felt genuine fear because of him. I think it's because I just read people well and know absolutely that he would not harm me. But yes, I have had some very minor trepidations a couple times, not knowing what something was actually going to feel like, or if he slipped I could get burned, or what he actually had planned for me. But not a lick of fear, no, because I just KNOW he would not harm me. When he comes at me cackling and trying to shake me up a little bit, it just makes me giggle. He hates that, lol.

lally2 -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 1:45:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: windchymes lally, lefse is a Norwegian delicacy, sort of a flour tortilla-like thing made from a dough whose main ingredient is mashed potatoes. No matter what you do to the recipe, or which recipe you use, it will give you grief, lol. I declared it evil back over the holidays. But we still laugh about it. so its a sort of massochistic ritual to get covered in flour, end up with gloop and no supper [:)] - my kinda cookin' Like you, I have never felt genuine fear because of him. I think it's because I just read people well and know absolutely that he would not harm me. But yes, I have had some very minor trepidations a couple times, not knowing what something was actually going to feel like, or if he slipped I could get burned, or what he actually had planned for me. But not a lick of fear, no, because I just KNOW he would not harm me. When he comes at me cackling and trying to shake me up a little bit, it just makes me giggle. He hates that, lol. i wonder if its a bit along the lines of what LadynTrainer is talking about. one of her slaves shows no fear and the other one does and something rises up in her. so cause - effect - desired outcome. since we feel no fear [:)] - we probably find ourselves types who arent interested in instilling fear anyway - which is why we've never come across it maybe. i think the power of the imagination is extremely strong and i guess we could all imagine ourselves into a terrified state - im dwelling on something at the moment, but im really enjoying it - but deep down i know that the minute i hear his voice i just wont be frightened anymore. so maybe its the anticipation of what might happen that gets our juices in a knot

windchymes -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 2:41:48 PM)
LOL.....it was masochistic all right. But he fed me well, even dessert, use your imagination there [;)] But I actually am looking forward to attempting it again with him, which I will be doing next month :) Interesting statement you made about instilling fear. You know, I think if I had shown true fear of him, he would have thought me a twit.....if I was truly afraid, what the hell was I doing there to begin with, out there in the middle of nowhere where, as he likes to remind me, where no one can hear me scream??? Along the same lines, were we to switch roles, which isn't likely, but just for discussion's sake, I don't see myself wanting to instill fear, either. Delicious anticipation, yes, fear, no.

littlewonder -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 2:56:29 PM)
While I'm not afraid of Master in general.....I wouldn't want to be, I don't want to constantly having to watch my back or walk on eggshells around him, there are times when he strikes a chord of fear in me because I'm never quite sure what he may do, when he may do it or how. He likes to catch me off guard and it keeps me on my toes with him and makes our passion for each other even hotter.

Mercnbeth -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 3:09:55 PM)
quote: But does it tweak you to find that, every now and then, you're a little afraid of your partner? no. but then, rollercoasters hold absolutely no appeal, either.

lally2 -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 3:12:08 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: windchymes You know, I think if I had shown true fear of him, he would have thought me a twit.....if I was truly afraid, what the hell was I doing there to begin with, out there in the middle of nowhere where, as he likes to remind me, where no one can hear me scream??? that is quite a delicious thought though - noone can hear our screams - we are completely vulnerable and at their mercy - on some level i do find myself feeling incredibly drawn to that. but only because i know ive nothing to fear from him as a person - so i can submit and enjoy, which is my prefferance i guess - and yet there is that edge of being alone, in the middle of nowhere with a powerful man who has sadistic tendencies [:)]

jbcurious -> RE: Do you want to be (a little) afraid of your partner? (4/6/2010 3:41:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lally2 so im meeting a guy in a wood after dark under a full moon and when i think about it now im getting butterflies though it isnt for another month. being alone in a wood with a big bloke who has designs on me is getting me to the feelings youre describing there. i know ill be 100% safe with him, i know that, but yes, that power and the mind behind it - its delicious but i can well imagine how ill be feeling while im waiting for him to turn up and when he turns up. I'm having such a giggle right now... The last time I went to meet a big bloke in the woods... He wanted me to flog him and then wound up pissing all over himself... NOT what I had in mind.

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