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RE: Surprise! - 4/23/2010 1:17:29 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

I had a sub who decided that since I was a Dom, I wanted her to shave.  I didn't, and felt annoyed that she considered me a generic Dom instead of just me.



Is that why you grew the beard?

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Surprise! - 4/23/2010 6:17:04 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I've surprised Master with little gifts and stuff. He's never complained so I'm going to assume he doesn't mind.


He loves them


_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Surprise! - 4/24/2010 6:53:46 PM   
littlegirlangel


Posts: 31
Joined: 9/17/2009
Status: offline 		Daddy likes to surprise me with little things. He came home today with throat numbing stuff that I'd been asking for because I have trouble with deep throating and he knows I've been trying my best to get better at it and this will help me. I've been looking at recipes so I can learn to cook better for him.

I like surprising Daddy and he likes surprising me.

(in reply to jbcurious)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 2:07:53 AM   
subsfaith


Posts: 297
Joined: 11/21/2006
Status: offline 		Oh my... Surprise!   I got one... a big one!

This is my birthday weekend, the big 4-0!  My Sir takes me out for a drink on Friday night as usual, and there in the bar was balloons and my family.  My son, my little sister, my aunt and uncle.... who all live in a different country!!

I had no idea.  Sir has been planning for months to get them all out here, to have them met from the airport, arranged accommodation, the whole kit and caboodle.

I think that answers the Master's portion of the question!

(in reply to littlegirlangel)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 6:20:44 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jbcurious

I can see by most of the answers that initiative doesn't seem to be a very desirable trait in a sub... I'll have to be careful that I find a Dom who likes that in a sub.


Just be prepared for rejection if you guessed wrong. I am not comfortable with rejection, with being told I did it wrong. Even when he's kind about it, I still don't like it. But this is more my issue than his.

The other thing is that if you're catering to him on your own, then there comes a point where he isn't actively dominating you because you aren't allowing him the opportunity to tell you what to do. Anticipatory service can also lead you into feeling resentful when he turns down something you've spent a lot of time on. You need to be careful of these possible problems.


_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to jbcurious)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 6:40:04 AM   
RuffneckandHis


Posts: 15
Joined: 3/15/2010
Status: offline 		My Master isn't very big on surprises...however, he does like it when I put extra effort in improving myself as a slave, but I wouldn't consider that to be a "surprise".

_____________________________

"And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music."
— Friedrich Nietzsche

(in reply to jbcurious)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 6:55:32 AM   
Aynne88


Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline
He loves it, every single thing I do for him, from taking his drycleaning to cooking elaborate meals to scheduling massages, anything I do that is a pleasure for him, he loves. I have yet to once be reprimanded for being a woman that tends to her man, and I never ask because his wife never ever did anything like that for him, so he is amazed every time I take the initiative to makes his life simpler and more enjoyable. Even if it is a total surprise.

_____________________________

As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)



(in reply to RuffneckandHis)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 7:20:41 AM   
jbcurious


Posts: 717
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		What a wonderful surprise!!!!  

_____________________________

'Smile... it's the second best thing to do with your lips.'


I have an explosive personality...


(in reply to subsfaith)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 7:24:00 AM   
jbcurious


Posts: 717
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP


Just be prepared for rejection if you guessed wrong. I am not comfortable with rejection, with being told I did it wrong. Even when he's kind about it, I still don't like it. But this is more my issue than his.

The other thing is that if you're catering to him on your own, then there comes a point where he isn't actively dominating you because you aren't allowing him the opportunity to tell you what to do. Anticipatory service can also lead you into feeling resentful when he turns down something you've spent a lot of time on. You need to be careful of these possible problems.



I don´t think the fact that he has to verbalize what he wants makes him any more actively ¨Dominant... the fact that he brings out my submissiveness and that what I do is to please him makes him very Dominant in my mind.  If I guess wrong then that´s my issue to deal with and can´t imagine feeling resentful... more pissed at myself for getting it wrong.


_____________________________

'Smile... it's the second best thing to do with your lips.'


I have an explosive personality...


(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 7:25:29 AM   
jbcurious


Posts: 717
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aynne88


He loves it, every single thing I do for him, from taking his drycleaning to cooking elaborate meals to scheduling massages, anything I do that is a pleasure for him, he loves. I have yet to once be reprimanded for being a woman that tends to her man, and I never ask because his wife never ever did anything like that for him, so he is amazed every time I take the initiative to makes his life simpler and more enjoyable. Even if it is a total surprise.


That´s my thoughts in what I would like to find in a D/s relationship...


_____________________________

'Smile... it's the second best thing to do with your lips.'


I have an explosive personality...


(in reply to Aynne88)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 7:32:08 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		Next life - I'm Aynee's lover. Yup.

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to jbcurious)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 7:40:29 AM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline
quote:

D/M types... How comfortable are you with your s type taking the initiative to do something to surprise you and what´s your response? If the surprise causes some inconvenience... ex. a surprise candlelit dinner when you have plans for the evening, how do you handle it?

Well placed initiative is a wonderful thing. I enjoy and encourage it. Nothing to me says I love and adore you more than someone who has been thoughtful enough to do those special things without having to be asked.

The latter part not so much if it was known to her that I had plans would be an issue. If not then who wouldn't swap a night out for a candlelight dinner in with someone that went the extra mile.


_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to jbcurious)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 7:46:02 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

The latter part not so much if it was known to her that I had plans would be an issue.


Seems to me, Icarys, if a gal set up a surprise for you *knowing* it would cause you inconvenience it would be manipulation and pretty selfish...

Just a thought.
best,
sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to Icarys)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 7:55:43 AM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

quote:

The latter part not so much if it was known to her that I had plans would be an issue.


Seems to me, Icarys, if a gal set up a surprise for you *knowing* it would cause you inconvenience it would be manipulation and pretty selfish...

Just a thought.
best,
sunshine

That's why I'd have an issue with it. Thanks for pointing that out.

The reason I say this is because she would know of my plans for the day unless I was also planning a surprise.


_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 7:57:14 AM   
jbcurious


Posts: 717
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

Well placed initiative is a wonderful thing. I enjoy and encourage it. Nothing to me says I love and adore you more than someone who has been thoughtful enough to do those special things without having to be asked.

The latter part not so much if it was known to her that I had plans would be an issue. If not then who wouldn't swap a night out for a candlelight dinner in with someone that went the extra mile.



If she knew you had plans that would just be plain stupid and I would think the person was playing games... I was thinking more along an unplanned business meeting that just came up... and again, throwing everything in the fridge and enjoying it as a midnight snack picnic style would be fine... my feelings wouldn´t be hurt.


_____________________________

'Smile... it's the second best thing to do with your lips.'


I have an explosive personality...


(in reply to Icarys)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 8:03:43 AM   
loverly


Posts: 236
Joined: 1/23/2004
Status: offline 		When i was previously Owned.. i did little things all the time and He loved every one of them.. i also gave Him a surprise birthday party .. which was risky i suppose.. and Hard to do cuz we were togethr 24/7 365 days a year! however.. it was a nice gathering and He teared up as NO ONE had Ever given him a party before.. Never.. not even his mother! ( that he could remember ) so the people invited for the weekend and His favorite foods all being presented was Wonderful! ( i cried in a serious manner hearing No one had ever done this for him and was thrilled He had a Blast!)
i would like to believe that it is really all about paying very close attention and knowing HIM really well... in making the outcome a positive one.

(in reply to jbcurious)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 8:22:21 AM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jbcurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

Well placed initiative is a wonderful thing. I enjoy and encourage it. Nothing to me says I love and adore you more than someone who has been thoughtful enough to do those special things without having to be asked.

The latter part not so much if it was known to her that I had plans would be an issue. If not then who wouldn't swap a night out for a candlelight dinner in with someone that went the extra mile.



If she knew you had plans that would just be plain stupid and I would think the person was playing games... I was thinking more along an unplanned business meeting that just came up... and again, throwing everything in the fridge and enjoying it as a midnight snack picnic style would be fine... my feelings wouldn´t be hurt.


Since you didn't specify and I can't read minds, I went with what I thought you might mean. There are a number of possible motivations and scenario's.

I don't have unplanned business meetings and can't really think of anything that might come up that I wouldn't call home and make her aware of beforehand.

Anyway..Gotcha..You didn't mean it that way.


_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to jbcurious)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 8:32:27 AM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		Christ. If someone goes out of their way to do something thoughtful what kind of an asshole pisses on that parade?

"bad subsusie, you know I don't like shit sandwiches."

_____________________________



(in reply to jbcurious)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 8:53:39 AM   
jbcurious


Posts: 717
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

Since you didn't specify and I can't read minds, I went with what I thought you might mean. There are a number of possible motivations and scenario's.

I don't have unplanned business meetings and can't really think of anything that might come up that I wouldn't call home and make her aware of beforehand.

Anyway..Gotcha..You didn't mean it that way.



don´t be so defensive... I wasn´t implying that you were supposed to be a mind reader... only that a sub who would intentionally do something like that would be stupid and yes, I imagine there are some out there that would play a game like that.


_____________________________

'Smile... it's the second best thing to do with your lips.'


I have an explosive personality...


(in reply to Icarys)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Surprise! - 4/25/2010 9:02:56 AM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jbcurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

Since you didn't specify and I can't read minds, I went with what I thought you might mean. There are a number of possible motivations and scenario's.

I don't have unplanned business meetings and can't really think of anything that might come up that I wouldn't call home and make her aware of beforehand.

Anyway..Gotcha..You didn't mean it that way.



don´t be so defensive... I wasn´t implying that you were supposed to be a mind reader... only that a sub who would intentionally do something like that would be stupid and yes, I imagine there are some out there that would play a game like that.


Don't read into what isn't there.

You simply didn't specify and I was pointing that out.


_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to jbcurious)
Profile   Post #: 40
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