quote:

ORIGINAL: Andalusite

RCdc, for me, sex generally doesn't involve objectification, though it can occasionally. Maybe that's different for you, but as I told Silence, you can't know better than I do what I am experiencing and feeling.

Silence, I'd say property more like a pet than like an inanimate object. I obviously have a mind and will and reactions of my own, although I bend them to his wishes to the best of my ability. I'm not really focused on labels or relationship dynamics - when I was looking, I was open to someone of any BDSM or D/s orientation, as long as we were compatible in both vanilla and kinky aspects. Since my Master decided to call me his slave, or sometimes his pet, and I felt that I could reasonably comply with his expectations of me *as* his slave (compared to his expectations of a submissive), I made the commitment to be in this dynamic with him.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Andalusite

Maybe that's different for you, but as I told Silence, you can't know better than I do what I am experiencing and feeling.

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ORIGINAL: Silence8

This seems increasingly like the crux of the matter, why the opposition just doesn't add up:

I cannot see a way that the predominance of objectified relationships in everyday reality would not affect everyday sexual reality. I cannot with an intellectual conscience maintain this fantasy of separation, especially in BDSM relationships, where the magic word 'slave' is taken quite directly from the most objectified form of human labor.

If you want to engage intellectually, explain to me why the same word is used. This is the elephant in the room for your perspective. For mine, it's simply another part.

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ORIGINAL: Andalusite

I already answered, but to give a little more detail, someone at some point thought it was hot, and used it, and other people liked it and decided to as well. It's BDSM jargon, just as a BDSM "switch" doesn't mean the same thing as a light switch or a peach tree switch. I don't think it has a universal meaning beyond that. Anyway, you still haven't explained why you feel you have a better insight into my emotions and reactions than I do.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Silence8
Search through the thread for where I say I understand you better than yourself. But I'm not stupid enough to think that you understand yourself fully, since I'm not capable of a complete understanding of myself. The who-is-more-egotistical game cuts both ways.

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ORIGINAL: Silence8

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ORIGINAL: Andalusite
I don't tend to feel objectified by sex or by masochism, and I don't objectify other people during sex or sadism. I've only really experienced objectification in the context of art - I feel objectified in a good way by being a model for a photo shoot, or by having body art done on me. I'm just a canvas, or the "subject," rather than them focusing on me as a person for that period of time. It's pretty neat, actually. I've done casual play, but only with people I know and had developed a friendship with first, usually for months beforehand. I'm not at all interested in casual sex.

Also, I don't believe an individual has to know he is objectifying or being objectified for it to occur.

Generally, though, immobilization tends to imply objectification. Sensory deprivation, speech and eye contact restrictions, bondage, imprisonment, even menial tasks all can (and perhaps, more strongly, usually do) imply some degree of objectification.