RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own)

RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (Full Version)

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sunshinemiss -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 10:29:43 PM)
quote: ... a lot of women find intellectuals attractive. Especially grad students (and then professors...) I'm going to agree with you here Silence. I (a professor and former grad student) do find intellectuals attractive. I can't tell you how often I walk down the halls of my hallowed institution and just groan in well let's face it yummy desire as I watch other professors or some students having intellectual discussions. There are some men I even have to be very careful around because the cleaning staff would be deeply upset with all the messes I'd make. On the other hand, men who are able to handle their emotions are also deeply attractive. The combination of the two can be devastating. Add some humor and no woman is safe! best, sunshine

sunshinemiss -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 10:31:53 PM)
[sm=mop.gif]

SocratesNot -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 10:32:08 PM)
Rochsub, I'm perfectly OK with you. I wasn't even offended, maybe just annoyed. My comment about honesty was just my own idea, not based just on your last comment, but on all the comments on these boards. Really, young people aren't taken seriously just because they are young. If they skillfully lied about their age and experience they would be able to achieve much more. I don't think you needed to apologize at all, but if you did it, I accept your apology. When it comes to Silence I don't think he is ass. Just like me he has the courage to challenge the mainstream and default opinions and to state unpopular things at the risk of being rejected. I think that every forum must have some forces of opposition.

Silence8 -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 10:32:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss quote: A true intellectual needs no recourse other than the veracity of his or her own thought. wow. I don't know a thing about you Silence. I have only today noticed you on the boards. I have not looked at your profile. All I have to know about you is what little I've read. The statement you made above says quite a lot about you. I do hope that either 1. You were joking although I doubt it. 2. You will learn and realize how far off course this is and eventually look back and shake your head. 3. You like being alone because it will be your self-imposed destiny. None of these is bad per se, but they do each come with their own set of pros and cons. Regardless, well wishes, sunshine Earth to sunshine: not everyone is thrilled with anti-intellectuals, or magic hats who pose as scientists. What is off-course exactly? I'm sick of all these meta-conversations -- if you don't have anything to contribute to a conversation, just don't say it, move on and let the people capable of a given breed of thought be unimpeded. Everything comes down to 'Oh, you have no experience, you don't have good sex, you're too young, you're too old, you're too fat, you're too skinny' and it's simply inappropriate.

Rochsub2009 -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 10:33:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss I (a professor and former grad student) do find intellectuals attractive. I can't tell you how often I walk down the halls of my hallowed institution and just groan in well let's face it yummy desire as I watch other professors or some students having intellectual discussions. There are some men I even have to be very careful around because the cleaning staff would be deeply upset with all the messes I'd make. On the other hand, men who are able to handle their emotions are also deeply attractive. The combination of the two can be devastating. Add some humor and no woman is safe! Silence8, And i'm sure she finds intelligent men who don't come off as condescending blowhards to be even more attractive. Hint, hint, hint. [;)]

Silence8 -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 10:35:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SocratesNot I am beginning to think that for young people it is better to lie about their age and level of experience, and this is the only way for them to be taken seriously. If I invented the stories about 3 intensive D/s relationships in which I was and said that I am 43, many people would actually believe in the great part of my theory. What a fool I am. How that didn't come to my mind earlier? I appreciate the fact that Rochsub appreciates my honesty. But I am really wondering if honesty is really that important. Yes, maybe I should make a new profile... I'm thinking... 29 year-old Dominant female with a hot picture. I post the same abstruse theorizing, and suddenly everyone is a philosopher!

laurell3 -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 10:40:21 PM)
LOL god I love you Roch, always intelligent, always polite, always willing to give someone the benefit of the doubt over and over, but...definitely willing to throw yourself in the gutter with gusto when need be!

sunshinemiss -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 10:47:54 PM)
quote: Earth to sunshine: not everyone is thrilled with anti-intellectuals, or magic hats who pose as scientists. What is off-course exactly? I'm sick of all these meta-conversations -- if you don't have anything to contribute to a conversation, just don't say it, move on and let the people capable of a given breed of thought be unimpeded. Everything comes down to 'Oh, you have no experience, you don't have good sex, you're too young, you're too old, you're too fat, you're too skinny' and it's simply inappropriate. Hello Silence, What is off course - no one is an island. That is what I'm meaning. Your own veracity, while yes there is import there, it is not the end all and be all. It is also true that we don't know who we are until we know who we are not. We can not live inside a vacuum. Even Einstein actually conversed with other people - intellectuals or no (he was known as kind, modest, friendly), considered different opinions, enjoyed life and frivolity. My response to you was in response to the "no recourse except one's own veracity"... that's just not true. It is one of those things... slippery things in fact... Yes Truth, one's own Truth is important, is paramount even. But to say a true intellectual needs no recourse except his own veracity is just foolish, arrogant, and lonely. On a more personal note, never once have I said any of the things you've stated... the no experience, the good sex, etc. I don't believe in that. There are some things that people learn through experience. The concept of riding a bike is very different from the physical experience of it. But that doesn't de-value the concept. I'd rather have the actual physical experience in conjunction with the theory. I have never condemned you, ridiculed you, or called you names. I have stuck to fairly dispassionate arguments (except with the recent one about the other professors at my University and that was in serious and in fun).... While I have treated you with calm respect, your "earth to sunshine" certainly suggests disrespect on your part. Again... anti intellectuals? Who are those people? I've not seen them... at least not noticed them on this thread. The people I see you in serious disagreement with (myself, RedMagic, and Roch Sub) are all intellectuals - according to my definition. Some of us just disagree with parts of what you are saying. Best, sunshine

Silence8 -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 10:57:03 PM)
quote: People do stuff 'cause they like it, it feels right or they feel comfortable with it. Too wordy? I'm sorry, but this reeks of anti-intellectualism. And it was in direct response to SocratesNot's very thoughtful attempt at a theory of d/s. This type of sentiment deeply offends me as an intellectual and a philosopher (even, as someone with experience in social science). Not to mention the extremely dubious moral and ethical implications. Notably, it's the same as Sade's imperative, which I do not really endorse. I wonder what Hannah Arendt would have said?

WyldHrt -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 10:58:43 PM)
quote: I am beginning to think that for young people it is better to lie about their age and level of experience, and this is the only way for them to be taken seriously. Bad idea, and you are (once again) wrong. As to age, please do a search for VaguelyCurious (sorry sweetie) and read her posts. She is in your age bracket, yet her serious posts have earned her the respect of many members here, due to her obvious intelligence, maturity, and plain common sense. Forum rules prevent me from naming folks not involved in this thread, but I will tell you that I've gotten to know other young folks here who have very much impressed me, one of whom I would likely have submitted to had the opportunity presented. He is 18 years my junior and in his early 20s, and that didn't matter at all, even though I won't usually consider a man younger than 45 for a serious relationship. quote: If I invented the stories about 3 intensive D/s relationships in which I was and said that I am 43, many people would actually believe in the great part of my theory. If you are referring to people with R/L experience, you are quite mistaken on that. Most of us have our bullshit meters set to ultra-high, more than enough to suss when someone is pulling 'experience' out of thin air and/or lying their ass off. You lack the experience to lie convincingly, TBH, although the attempt would be amusing. quote: What a fool I am. How that didn't come to my mind earlier? Common sense submerging your desire to show your ass, perhaps? I seriously suggest you spend some time reading (*not* posting) in the 'Ask A Mistress' forum. See how fast the ladies nail wankers and liars there. quote: I appreciate the fact that Rochsub appreciates my honesty. But I am really wondering if honesty is really that important. Wow... just, wow. You have just demonstrated your complete lack of understanding of lifestyle relationships and what makes them work. Good job.

Silence8 -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 11:05:11 PM)
quote: But to say a true intellectual needs no recourse except his own veracity is just foolish, arrogant, and lonely. This, by the way, totally misses my point, that RedMagic was hiding behind his or her supposed qualifications, rather than addressing the points. Honestly, he even played the 'you could never understand science' game; my supposed pretension was thinking abstractly! Frankly, I'm more impressed with articulate thought than any bullshit some no-name technocrat can hang on the wall, besides the books he or she hasn't read, and the men and women he or she never fucked (well). Modern man is deeply unimpressive -- but some people slip through the cracks --------

SocratesNot -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 11:07:35 PM)
I am extremely honest. I am even that honest that I honestly express my desire for lying. You should also know that there are many very skillful and intelligent liars and people believed them even if they never experienced types of things that they lied about. I don't approve of lying I'm just telling you the possibilities. It's too easy to judge and criticize young people for their lack of experience and their age.

laurell3 -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 11:10:10 PM)
His qualifications are quite real as I'm sure many people here can attest to. Without getting into paticulars I have seen his work, he's one brainy dude and a half. He is underestimating himself, believe me. But moreso, despite all that, he LISTENS, he LIVES, he enjoys life and doesn't tell others what they should be or how life is and he LEARNS from listening to others, even when they are different than him.

Silence8 -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 11:17:01 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 His qualifications are quite real as I'm sure many people here can attest to. Without getting into paticulars I have seen his work, he's one brainy dude and a half. He is underestimating himself, believe me. But moreso, despite all that, he LISTENS, he LIVES, he enjoys life and doesn't tell others what they should be or how life is and he LEARNS from listening to others, even when they are different than him. That's good to hear. If he ever manages to muster a theory of d/s I'll be sure to read it. Until then I'm more interested in the people who have more experience thinking critically about humanity, psychology, philosophy, and other subjects that I study, and have for many, many years, and will continue to study with or without the approval of anonymous 'hard scientists'.

SocratesNot -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 11:22:01 PM)
quote: Cakewalk. It is MY primary mission in life to make Carol happy. Carol (well, Carol in an alternate universe) needs me to submit in order to be happy. So I choose and execute a course of action in order to achieve my own objectives. How more more dominant can you get that that? It's all about me and what I want -- which is pleasing her. It would contain large elements of self-discipline and self-control. On the outside, it would look exactly identical to how Carol submits to me. On the inside, the process is wildly different. For Carol, there is no "process" for submitting. That's her default action... it just happens. Jeff, how can you be sure that the very same thing is not the case with Carol? You said she wants very much to please you. If SHE wants to please you, this is HER desire, so it is possible that she is just doing all the necessary stuff (such as serving you slavishly, being obedient etc) just in order to accomplish her own goal of pleasing you and making you happy. That would make her submission "dominant in its mindset" too? What do you think?

sunshinemiss -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 11:22:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Silence8 quote: People do stuff 'cause they like it, it feels right or they feel comfortable with it. Too wordy? I'm sorry, but this reeks of anti-intellectualism. And it was in direct response to SocratesNot's very thoughtful attempt at a theory of d/s. This type of sentiment deeply offends me as an intellectual and a philosopher (even, as someone with experience in social science). Hello Silence, How in the world is that anti-intellectual? For goodness sakes. It is actually based on some very scholarly work and scientific studies. Just because I don't couch it in paragraphs and paragraphs of words does not make it any less true. You know what this reminds me of? There are people that tell me "I have gastroenteritis". They think it sounds all high faluting and medical. I know it means they have a tummy ache. And sure, I was poking fun at the fact that S.N. wrote a lengthy OP. But so what? It was done with light hearted humor. You know, most really funny people are absolutely brilliant. Stunningly, breathtakingly smart. It's what makes them able to be funny. Best, sunshine

laurell3 -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 11:24:57 PM)
He's probably too busy getting laid to entertain your arrogant requests Silence. Did you ever think that toning it down a bit might help? I mean, look at SN here, he keeps plugging away with the same insulting stuff over and over oblivious to the effect he has, but yet his tone is polite and people keep coming back to attempt to help him see the light...... Look both of you, I find it inherently unfair to say to someone "you are too young" because age isn't something you can change, is it? However, there really is a learning curve to this whole relationship thing that involves HAVING RELATIONSHIPS. This doesn't mean you can't have opinions, it means when you have no experience or very little and tell others they are wrong for themselves, you aren't going to be taken in a very favorable light. Until you have had that moment where someone looks at you and worships you or you look at someone else and know that you have absolutely surrendered to them and know what that means for you, you are just putting words on the page without much substance. All these things you toss around as "intellectual thinking" many of us have DONE and thought of in the moment and really found what it means to be us in the arena of bdsm and d/s. It is fair? No. Is that life? Yes. Get off the net, and go LIVE!

SocratesNot -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 11:28:16 PM)
Sunshine your theory even if it might be true is so obvious, that it lacks any insight and depth whatsoever. This is the same as if I said "people eat because they are hungry" and called it "theory of nutrition, metabolism and energy balance in organism". Also your assertion about gastroenteritis is not true. Gastroenteritis is a very specific disease - namely this is inflammation of stomach and bowels. However there are numerous other diseases that cause "tummy ache".

sunshinemiss -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 11:30:24 PM)
quote: Sunshine your theory even if it might be true is so obvious, that it lacks any insight and depth whatsoever. Sometiems, that which is simple is true... it is borne of deep insight. Sometimes we must look at what is rather than what we think it is. Good luck, sunshine

SocratesNot -> RE: An interesting theory of D/s (my own) (5/26/2010 11:32:51 PM)
But the problem is that no one will learn anything from your theory. It does not contain any additional information apart from what people already know. There is no "why" in your theory. Theory without "why" is not a theory at all. Theories try to explain, not to state obvious facts.

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