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CountrySong -> RE: What is the subbie mafia? (6/3/2010 1:24:04 AM)
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Correction - Several recent posts have mentioned the use of horseheads. However, extensive research has lead me to the conclusion that this is a ploy designed to misdirect those who might get on the wrong side of the subbie Mafia.
This research has also led to the discovery of the real cause for fear - HORSERADISH!!!
Warning - If you recieve a jar of horseradish by mail or have one suddenly appear on your porch or in your car then you have very little time left to correct your ways (Though I was unable to uncover any information on it, if you are delivered the dreaded horseradish you may wish to contact SirPumpy about the cookie defense.) However, if you find a root of horseradish in your bed it is too late - you have little time to prepare your affairs to leave the "Dominant Lifestyle" behind and prepare to enter the world of submission!
In an exclusive interview with a member of the subbie Mafia (who shall remain unnamed) this reporter was privileged to hear of some of the wonderful experiences that await those who recieve the horseradish of death!
Due to the sensitiveness of many in our audience I will not go into the gruesome details however I will mention a few of the horrors that await those who have been gifted the horseradish of death: anal horseradish figging plugs, penile horseradish sounds, baths of ground horseradish to soak in after a flogging, horseradish and dishsoap to wash out foul mouths; horseradish and vinager enemas; horseradish lube; etc.
It should also be noted that contrary to popular belief; todays super hot varieties of horseradish and japanese horseradish(wasabi) where not developed by the farming and food industry. They were infact developed by members of the subbie Mafia both as instruments of torture and as marketable products to help fund various subbie Mafia endeavors.
Note - since horseradish is most potent when fresh, looking for horseradish plants in a subbie's garden or a garden of one of that subbie's friend may indicat membership in the subbie Mafia.
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