crazyml
Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: takingu84116
A Man has a choice, treat what He owns with care and admiration or neglect it and watch as it diminishes. Why would anyone neglect to change the oil in a new car or allow their home to remain in disrepair?
This is fair enough. But it's not exactly "insight" is it?
quote:
If a Man owns a girl,
Personally speaking I think that the concept of "ownership" is a complete nonsense - I don't suggest that people who form "ownership" oriented relationships are wrong, just that it seems absurd to me.
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He must cherish that gift…nurture it and enhance the quality.
This could be preceded with "If a dominant is given submission by his or her partner..."
Then this would be pefectly ok - although pretty obvious to me.
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Most don’t realize the responsibility of accepting owning a girl…
I don't know if this is true, I think many Dominants don't appreciate the responsibility associated with having someone submit to them - but I'm not sure it's "most".
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she is not capable of success or failure on her own.
Again, I guess there are some submissives out there for whom this is true - Personally I've no interest whatsoever in this kind of submissive - and would be more inclined to suggest they get some help with their self-esteem before looking for a partner.
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If she fails Him, He is responsible for that failure.
I totally disagree with this as a blanket statement - If you'd said "If she fails him, he must take his share of the responsibility for that failure" I'd agree 100%. But to blankly state that the dom is responsible for all of the failings of the sub is - In my personal opinion a nonsense.
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If she becomes the gem that she can be, He created her.
I have to be honest here - My immediate reaction on reading this line was to choke on my coffee while saying "JACKASS".
On reflection, it's a cutesey thing to say and all - but doesn't reach me at all.
So, to your OP - you're describing a relationship that would be utterly pointless and empty to me but you make a couple of points that, with a little refinement are valid (even if they ought to be gobsmackingly obvious to anyone with any common sense). The fact that I find the type of "ownership" you appear to describe is absurd to me doesn't invalidate it by any means - and I'm sure there are people who are needy enough to require someone to take this level of responsibility over their lives, and I hope these people meet the kind of dom who understands the responsibility this implies and who will enjoy that role.
So as a first post - you've raised a couple of faintly interesting points.
But then you spoil it..
quote:
ORIGINAL: takingu84116
I'm not at all surprise by those that have completely missed the point LOL
If people have missed the point that you were trying to make - whose fault is that?
So you're "LOL"ing at your own failure to communicate.
LOL.
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There is nothing more lovely than an emotionally healthy submissive girl... My point is why would someone choose to tear her down?
Fuck me - is that your point? Your whole point is "Why would someone damage something they are responsible for?"
Isn't that a pretty inane observation?
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With regard to accepting responsibility for her... I see many here apparently believe that she is independent. Are you afraid of that responsibility?
Oooh snarky! No, I'm not "afraid" of that responsibility - It just has no appeal whatsoever.
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This is My first post on any online forum... Interesting the difference in what you online folks think is real and what I practice in life.
Now my "Acme Jackass" detector has blown a fuse. You have no clue how much online/offline experience the posters to this board have.
But then you seem to actually engage - and fair play to you!
quote:
ORIGINAL: takingu84116
Alright...point taken. I'll sit back and observe how the community works... I wrote in a reflective moment afer reading several profiles that appeared to carry a similar theme...
But, now that we have a discussion... Clearly many of you think my comment, or monologue, was misguided. On the surface I can see how it could be taken many different ways. Here's a simple example of what I meant that she is no capable of failure on her own.
If she knows that I expect her to be wearing certain clothing when I arrive home on Thursdays and when I get home I find that she has not met my expectations, has she failed or have I failed to train her properly?
A generous reading of the last sentence might produce a thoughtful point...
In my personal opinion, a decent Dom would want to know why the sub had failed to obey this request. There may be a dozen good reasons why the sub failed to dress as required.
It's true - the dom may have failed to properly communicate the requirements.
In the case of a valid reason - I would argue that perhaps the dom failed to ensure that the sub would be able to comply, or that perhaps "shit happened" and it's no-ones fault.
In the case of poor communication - then yeah, it's the dom's responsibility.
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Yes, this is a basic example, but makes a point. If I trained her correctly, then she would of course meet my expectations. Does this mean she won't be corrected? No, she will of course need to learn. Now, life is not this simple... It takes time an a lot of dedication to build a successful relationship.
No! You may have trained her superbly, but other reasons might conspire to make it impossible for her to meet your expectations.
Your point about the time and dedication required to build a successful relationship is fair (a bit obvious though).
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But, I believe that I am responsible for guiding that success.
Sure, that's ok - Although I would say that I'm looking for someone who would feel that it was our joint responsibility for guiding the success of the relationship.
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I do appreciate all of your comments... this has been an interesting experience.
You say you appreciate the comments, then you spoil it with this...
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ORIGINAL: takingu84116
LOL, okay... I see the simple point got nowhere.... enjoy your playtime here.
Bang. There goes another fuse.
I'd encourage you to read some of the other responses, with a little less snark, and a little more humility.
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ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika
quote:
If she knows that I expect her to be wearing certain clothing when I arrive home on Thursdays and when I get home I find that she has not met my expectations, has she failed or have I failed to train her properly?
I'd say it was communication failure. And since you fancy yourself some kind of total control Dom, then the blame would fall slightly on your side.
I do not have delusions of being a total control Domme. I date smart and strong men. If they see an issue such as the one RedMagic1 exposed in his response to you, they will tell me. They know we are a team and we need to communicate with one another if our team is going to make it.
- LA
LA is one of a number of posters here who should be "required reading".
You should also get some kind of prize for producing the best post from SNot that I've read so far!
[edited for repetition]
[edited to fix quotage]
< Message edited by crazyml -- 6/6/2010 3:47:38 AM >
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RE: The responsibility of ownership - 
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RE: The responsibility of ownership - 
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