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When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 6:51:57 AM   
SocratesNot


Posts: 812
Joined: 5/17/2010
Status: offline 		How do Dom / Domme couples function?

Do they always need to have some submissives?

Can it be an egalitarian relationship or is one usually owned by the other, despite being a dominant?

In their relationship (not including other people) do they usually switch with each other or stick to vanilla-like dynamics?

Any such couples here who could let me know about their experiences first hand?

< Message edited by SocratesNot -- 6/12/2010 7:20:40 AM >

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RE: When a Dom fall in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 7:12:55 AM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Depends

The ex Dom was married to a Domme. He had me. She had her own slaves.

They eventually divorced though but under amicable terms.

Now I know others who are dom/domme and they stay togethter. Some switch with each other. Some have their own slaves. Some share a slave. Some just live like a regular couple and don't do anything at all about it.

It just depends....like everything else in life.

(in reply to SocratesNot)
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RE: When a Dom fall in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 7:56:28 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		SocratesNot old chap,  my wife and I are Dom/Domme or to me more correct Master/Mistress., have the right to own our own slaves or share slave who are collared to the home. Out lifestyle (Victorian now but was Gorean) are both lifestyles which is not dependent on slaves and what slaves we may own are service slaves as in domestic service and are referred to as servants or staff. As an addendum, both life styles are not dependant on the normal BDSM activities but bondage is part of what we don at times as is discipline. We were married in September 2001 but had been together for a few years prior to our marriage. AS thorough read of my profile should answer many of your questions as to how we live and work.

< Message edited by IronBear -- 6/12/2010 7:57:41 AM >

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RE: When a Dom fall in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 10:55:41 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Whatever they want to happen and work to make happen.

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RE: When a Dom fall in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 11:13:42 AM   
SocratesNot


Posts: 812
Joined: 5/17/2010
Status: offline
quote:

Whatever they want to happen and work to make happen.


This was extremely useful and quite informative answer.


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RE: When a Dom fall in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 11:14:50 AM   
SocratesNot


Posts: 812
Joined: 5/17/2010
Status: offline
quote:

SocratesNot old chap,  my wife and I are Dom/Domme or to me more correct Master/Mistress., have the right to own our own slaves or share slave who are collared to the home. Out lifestyle (Victorian now but was Gorean) are both lifestyles which is not dependent on slaves and what slaves we may own are service slaves as in domestic service and are referred to as servants or staff. As an addendum, both life styles are not dependant on the normal BDSM activities but bondage is part of what we don at times as is discipline. We were married in September 2001 but had been together for a few years prior to our marriage. AS thorough read of my profile should answer many of your questions as to how we live and work.


Thanks IronBear, I'll check your profile for more info.

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Amicus Plato, sed magis amica veritas. - Aristotle
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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 11:15:26 AM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		SNot,

There is no single "truth" here - Dom/domme couples work things out in a whole range of ways. Some join to share subs ( I would hazard a completely unscientific guess that this is the most common) some
maintain their own subs. I'm sure a few constantly vie for dominance and eventually their relationship fails. Others may settle into a relationship that is itself d/s. I had a lovely reln with a girl who was sub to me, but who enjoyed co-domming others, and pro- domming yet others.

This stuff isn't math, or even philosophy - the dynamics of relationships defy definition and subjection to frameworks.


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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 11:22:07 AM   
blueeyedbbwsub


Posts: 435
Joined: 12/9/2009
Status: offline 		Yanno what SocNot? They're not labels, they're people, human beings. A relationship is still based on two people, or poly if that's the case, and not on labels. QUIT with the damn labels and trying to make sense of the nonsensical you seem to be so good at coming up with. Again, STEP AWAY FROM THE KEYBOARD. Real life happens between real people, not labels.

I really don't know why I keep trying to get this through to you, since you seem unable to graps such a basic concept of life. O wait, I'm ever hopeful in life. That has to be it, maybe if I tell myself that enough I'll believe it.

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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 11:37:03 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline

  • No, they don't always need to have submissives. Not all dominants wilt in the absence of someone to fawn over them.
  • Yes, it can and probably must be an egalitarian relationship (that is, if you're using the same definition of dominant that I am).
  • I suppose all things are possible, but we didn't "switch" our D/s roles since neither had a well developed "s" side. Bedroom fun & games were a different story.


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I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 11:53:52 AM   
AQuietSimpleMan


Posts: 1410
Joined: 11/15/2009
Status: offline 		The skies open and Odin reclaims the earth.

NEVER LET THIS HAPPEN!!!

QSM

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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 12:00:13 PM   
Jasmineinbloom


Posts: 59
Joined: 4/24/2010
Status: offline 		I've had a loving relationship with a man who labled himself a dominant. The relationship lasted many years. His dominence (at least towards me) one day.

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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 3:41:19 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AQuietSimpleMan

The skies open and Odin reclaims the earth.

NEVER LET THIS HAPPEN!!!

QSM


Why? I ask again, why not allow this to happen, it is something I would be happy to see unless I am already seated in Valhalla with my forebears drinking Meade and awaiting Ragnarökk.

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Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 5:10:31 PM   
gedienstig


Posts: 155
Joined: 5/9/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

quote:

ORIGINAL: AQuietSimpleMan

The skies open and Odin reclaims the earth.

NEVER LET THIS HAPPEN!!!

QSM


Why? I ask again, why not allow this to happen, it is something I would be happy to see unless I am already seated in Valhalla with my forebears drinking Meade and awaiting Ragnarökk.


Because if Odin reclaims the earth, all there will be left is cabbage soup, Odin's favourite. And who, besides Odin and that weird alien from Louis de Funes movies, likes cabbage soup? 

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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 7:08:37 PM   
ShoreBound149


Posts: 622
Joined: 7/2/2009
Status: offline 		It's like when first cousins marry.  If they procreate the offspring will look very similiar to the folks waiting at the bus stop on the square in Lancaster, Pa.

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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 7:30:29 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ShoreBound149

It's like when first cousins marry.  If they procreate the offspring will look very similiar to the folks waiting at the bus stop on the square in Lancaster, Pa.



Dude. You're scaring me now.

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[page 23 girl]



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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 7:32:10 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		Why.. have you been to Lancaster?... is he right?

I think he is too good for Aileen!




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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 7:33:29 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		You get your sticky brain off Aileeen!! She was sucked up by Twue Lub, you don't stand a chance!

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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 7:36:14 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		ARe you kidding?...... God KNOWS what ol SHore brought back from termy's place!


AIleen is ruined!

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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 8:40:54 PM   
Glasgow


Posts: 248
Joined: 6/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SocratesNot

How do Dom / Domme couples function?

Do they always need to have some submissives?

Can it be an egalitarian relationship or is one usually owned by the other, despite being a dominant?

In their relationship (not including other people) do they usually switch with each other or stick to vanilla-like dynamics?

Any such couples here who could let me know about their experiences first hand?

About as well as the rest of us, no, don't be a retard,  they are all definitely 100% vanilla, not I.

< Message edited by Glasgow -- 6/12/2010 8:41:33 PM >

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RE: When a Dom falls in love with a Domme -what happens? - 6/12/2010 10:25:56 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		Then the Domme always converts to become a sub woman.  Every time.

/Ducks and runs/


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The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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