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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:18:43 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		Merc, I have to agree.... really.... :). Anytime I have ever seen someone ACT dominant, it always looked like a preformance.




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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:26:46 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NewDomCouple87

Only in an attempt to prove a point.


Get used to Me.  I do it all of the time.    (I also laughed so hard, I think I scared the neighbor's dog.  )

One of the biggest mistakes that happens when people decide that they're interested in this thing, oddly enough, is that they have to be a certain way.  I'll even bet there are folks out there who might think that it's 'undommely' to think of Me sitting here, in the middle of the afternoon, laughing Myself silly at a message board.  Pfffftttt.  In their head, they might have some preconceived notion that Dommes are serious, with some kind of stern face that wouldn't know a sense of humor if it hit them in the head.  Now, which kind of Dom do you really want to be?


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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:30:31 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		I wanted to be the serious kind!


It didn't work out.

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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:31:28 PM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline 		Submitting and obeying your dominant partner is a submissive "act"...That kinda squashes the whole "there aint no" arguement for me.

What do I know...I'll never write a book or probably have the extensive experience some of you uber doms have :>


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submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

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http://alturl.com/mog7m

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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:32:49 PM   
marie2


Posts: 1690
Joined: 11/4/2008
From: Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: marie2

Jefff wears a tiara that matches his mandals, and he doesn't care who thinks he's a princess!

I wonder how long a tiara would stay on while he's being pegged from behind?







Couldn't resist.





Lets say , for the sake of argument, such a thing happend.

I would get a chin strap for the tiara!





Who are you kidding? You would just use your Hello Kitty clip-on bows for the occasion.

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Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:33:55 PM   
divi


Posts: 11109
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline 		Puts a line through Jeff's name ..

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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:38:36 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

Submitting and obeying your dominant partner is a submissive "act"...That kinda squashes the whole "there aint no" arguement for me.

What do I know...I'll never write a book or probably have the extensive experience some of you uber doms have :>


I still don't think the act itself is important.  Don't get Me wrong.  The obedience sure is.

Somehow, I just got a kick out of the fact that you really said "uber".  Have you ever seen that parody using World of Warcraft toons?  There's one that talks entirely in computer speak.  He's uber, uber L33T.


http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=11&ved=0CD8QtwIwCg&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DiEWgs6YQR9A&rct=j&q=wow+uber+uber&ei=2-cbTPz4O9L-nAeq3bGZDg&usg=AFQjCNFmeIhSmheBLG023053RASMJ5i3cw


< Message edited by LadyPact -- 6/18/2010 2:45:25 PM >

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Icarys)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:38:42 PM   
marie2


Posts: 1690
Joined: 11/4/2008
From: Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

Submitting and obeying your dominant partner is a submissive "act"...That kinda squashes the whole "there aint no" arguement for me.




I can see it from this angle as well. And it was actually Ironbear's remark "Act like a dominant" that really struck a chord, as we are all sitting here saying that no acts are dominant. So how does one act like dominant?

To me, it's really a bit of a grayish area, and while I can see that an act, in and of itself, cannot be classified as dominant or submissive, there are certainly behaviors and demeanors that, in general , mark these personality traits the we call dominance and submission.

We may not want to admit to that, but then why is it that we can sense our counterparts in these things...It must be SOMETHING that they are doing, or saying that make them feel submissive or dominant to us.



< Message edited by marie2 -- 6/18/2010 2:39:30 PM >

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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:39:38 PM   
barelynangel


Posts: 6233
Status: offline 		There are people who mesh with the serious kind, there are people who mesh with the goofy balls, there are people who mesh with the inbetweens. To me you don't ask yourself what type of DOM do you want to be, you ask yourself what kind of person are you and then you build on the dominant concept from there. To me, trying to change who you are to hit a persona of a dom because you decided you want to be that kind of dom, doesn't work well for most and simply ends up with a lot of unhappy people.

In order to be a Dom in my opinon one has to know themselves very well and as the old saying goes -- know thyself and the Dom will come -- if that is what is natural for you.

angel

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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:43:14 PM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
I still don't think the act itself is important.  Don't get Me wrong.  The obedience sure is.
Really? Gosh. I've obeyed lots of people lots of times in my life and somehow I never saw myself as submitting. At least in my own little corner of the world, it comes down to an internal mindset. Either you see yourself as in control or you don't.

As a specific example. I'll use the classic "I just got pulled over by the highway patrol for speeding" scenario. In that situation, I do not have the authority and I am going to obey. But I don't see myself as submitting. I see myself as having acted dishonorably to start with by speeding and now choosing to act responsibly and 'pay my dues'. At no point would in any way whatsoever that I was not in control of the myself and the surroundings.

To me, it's all a state of mind.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:46:41 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		You people are really incapable of having a meaningful discussion.


The community really sucks.

< Message edited by domiguy -- 6/18/2010 2:48:16 PM >

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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:50:23 PM   
Icarys


Posts: 5757
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: marie2

quote:

ORIGINAL: Icarys

Submitting and obeying your dominant partner is a submissive "act"...That kinda squashes the whole "there aint no" arguement for me.




I can see it from this angle as well. And it was actually Ironbear's remark "Act like a dominant" that really struck a chord, as we are all sitting here saying that no acts are dominant. So how does one act like dominant?

To me, it's really a bit of a grayish area, and while I can see that an act, in and of itself, cannot be classified as dominant or submissive, there are certainly behaviors and demeanors that, in general , mark these personality traits the we call dominance and submission.

We may not want to admit to that, but then why is it that we can sense our counterparts in these things...It must be SOMETHING that they are doing, or saying that make them feel submissive or dominant to us.



Bingo..and the bottom line is it's true whether we admit it or not....so why pretend it's different?

edited cause for clarity :>


< Message edited by Icarys -- 6/18/2010 2:51:31 PM >

_____________________________

submission - the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness - the state of being submissive or compliant; meekness.

Alaska Bound-The Official Countdown Has Started!
http://tinyurl.com/872mcu3
http://alturl.com/mog7m

(in reply to marie2)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:52:31 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

You people are really incapable of having a meaningful discussion.


The community really sucks.

You're just jealous that I'm cyber banging Jefffff.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:53:06 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: barelynangel


In order to be a Dom in my opinon one has to know themselves very well and as the old saying goes -- know thyself and the Dom will come -- if that is what is natural for you.

angel


So in other words, if you are not natural Dom than knowing yourself does absolutely nothing.

Exactly what type of a person has ever uttered "the old saying"...It makes no sense.

Once again, barely, you have missed the mark.

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Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:53:10 PM   
divi


Posts: 11109
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline 		Was he any good LP ??

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( imho )

I really could use a wish right now

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Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:54:43 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

You people are really incapable of having a meaningful discussion.


The community really sucks.

You're just jealous that I'm cyber banging Jefffff.



Cyber banging? Please, I have taken the man in the middle of Clark St. The cheering crowd was the only thing that allowed me to go for fourths.

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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:56:12 PM   
NewDomCouple87


Posts: 15
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline 		I enjoyed our discussion as well LP. It will take a lot more than that to get under my skin. In fact, since this is all digital, between us at least, I doubt anything willl get under my skin.

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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:56:43 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		Come now.... tell her how fucking DOMINANT I was while you were doing it though!

_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

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Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:57:07 PM   
LadyNTrainer


Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

I am not entirely sure about that.

If I am on my hands and knees and you are banging the heel out of my ass, calling me a little bitch..... I am gonna have a hard time feeling dominant.


It's the way the act is being framed verbally that makes it a dominant act.  I know dominants who enjoy anal sex as the receiving partner who see it as being serviced the way they want to be by their submissive partner.  And why not, if it feels good?  I don't have a prostate so I'm not personally into being serviced that way.   As a hetero female with a healthy sexual appetite, I do order up and enjoy regular stud service from my collared boys, and they must stand and deliver.   

There's this stereotype that being the receiving partner in penetrative sex = submissive, but it just ain't so.  If you're the dominant, you get to order up the kind of sexual service that feels good to you.  In some cultures, the vagina is seen not as the object to be conquered, but the predatory mouth that takes and devours what is offered up for its pleasure.  Psychologically that image (vagina dentata) is alive and well in our own culture, especially in the dark undertones of some kinds of jokes.  Men who feel uneasy at the thought of being vulnerable and submitted during sex are likely to loudly and vigorously reinforce their belief in penetrator as conqueror to avoid having to think about a meme that scares them. 

Vaginas don't actually have teeth, and a powerful dominant woman who wants to take and "devour" the male offering for her pleasure also wants to give it back again in good condition after thoroughly appreciating how it feeds her.  Well, presumably she does, unless she's a lot kinkier than I am.  LOL   It is men's fear that puts the teeth down there, and that makes them want to believe that they are not offering or feeding, but conquering and taking.  

Which they can be, if that happens to be your kink.  It's all a matter of perspective, and what two or more consenting adults decide is their personal dynamic.  You really will be hard pressed to find an act that is intrinsically dominant or submissive, except that it is framed that way in context.


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RE: Dominant submisive acts? - 6/18/2010 2:57:56 PM   
marie2


Posts: 1690
Joined: 11/4/2008
From: Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

Come now.... tell her how fucking DOMINANT I was while you were doing it though!



I heard you were on your knees with your ass in the air. Doesn't sound too dominant to me.

(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 80
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