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RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 8:58:05 AM   
sappatoti


Posts: 14844
Joined: 10/30/2006
From: the edge of darkness...
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: persephonee
i need to pitch a tent in my living room and cant seem to hammer the stakes into the subfloor...what do i do?


quote:

ORIGINAL: JoyfulMistress
 
my car has a flat what should I do ?


Perse could change out the flat tire for you JM, after which she can take the flattened tire back with her to use as either an anchor for her tent or as additional weight behind her trying to ram the stakes into her floor.

-=-

My trackball device needs a new battery installed, but I can't seem to get the damn battery cover off. My fingers apparently are too fat. What to do?



_____________________________

Never mind the man on the edge of the darkness... he means no harm...

"Community, Identity, Stability." ~ A Brave New World, Aldous Huxley, 1932

If you don't like my attitude, QUIT TALKING TO ME!

(in reply to JoyfulMistress)
Profile   Post #: 4961
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:03:13 AM   
JoyfulMistress


Posts: 628
Joined: 10/31/2007
Status: offline 		shame your fingers into going for plastic surgery ... have all the fat in your fingers pumped into the battery lid for your track ball thing to make it bigger and easier for fingers no matter what size to get it off
 
I have a neighbor who should be on desperate housewives .. what do I do now ?

(in reply to sappatoti)
Profile   Post #: 4962
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:11:04 AM   
MarksFantasyGirl


Posts: 3660
Joined: 10/13/2005
Status: offline 		Sleep with them.... Isn't that like all the show is about??  I don't know, I don' watch it.

I have lost the remote... What do I do now?

_____________________________

--Fannie
AKA Savage's Fantasy
AKA Girl Dave
AKA Resident Flirt
AKA Sexy Hawt Woman

~*~Happily and proudly collared by my best friend~*~

Quitcher bitchen, and get out of the kitchen! ~Harry {3rdRock}

(in reply to JoyfulMistress)
Profile   Post #: 4963
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:11:09 AM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline 		phuk her

and i have to change a tire...what is a lugnut?

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to JoyfulMistress)
Profile   Post #: 4964
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:12:24 AM   
MarksFantasyGirl


Posts: 3660
Joined: 10/13/2005
Status: offline 		Lugnut is what you do when your crazy boyfriend gets drunk, and you have to carry him to bed.... You lug the nut!!


Now, about my remote.....

_____________________________

--Fannie
AKA Savage's Fantasy
AKA Girl Dave
AKA Resident Flirt
AKA Sexy Hawt Woman

~*~Happily and proudly collared by my best friend~*~

Quitcher bitchen, and get out of the kitchen! ~Harry {3rdRock}

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 4965
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:15:54 AM   
JoyfulMistress


Posts: 628
Joined: 10/31/2007
Status: offline 		go get prego .. have a baby and raise it to be a young teenager and demand they get up and change your tele channel .. that goes over so smoothly you will ponder why you didn't do this before
 
I have pink streaks in my hair but am thinking about putting purple in there what is the best way to do that ?

(in reply to MarksFantasyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 4966
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:18:52 AM   
MarksFantasyGirl


Posts: 3660
Joined: 10/13/2005
Status: offline 		HAHA! Don't tell me to go get prego.... I just might!! lol

OOOooooooooo A hair question!!!!  ::mutters to self:: Remember the game.... remember the game.....

Take the pink streaks, and with a serrated steak knife, cut them out.  Besure the hair is COMPLETELY dry... then, mix peroxide, bleach, and grape jello....  Hold your head in it till you pass out from the fumes...

My boyfriend is sleeping, and I'm lonely... How should I wake him up??

< Message edited by MarksFantasyGirl -- 11/21/2008 9:19:30 AM >

_____________________________

--Fannie
AKA Savage's Fantasy
AKA Girl Dave
AKA Resident Flirt
AKA Sexy Hawt Woman

~*~Happily and proudly collared by my best friend~*~

Quitcher bitchen, and get out of the kitchen! ~Harry {3rdRock}

(in reply to JoyfulMistress)
Profile   Post #: 4967
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:35:31 AM   
JoyfulMistress


Posts: 628
Joined: 10/31/2007
Status: offline 		go grab the first guy you see on the street .. strip him and toss him atop your sleeping man and have your way with him ... that is sure to wake you sleeping love in a great mood
 
I think I am hungry for lunch .. whatever should I do ?

(in reply to MarksFantasyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 4968
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:39:57 AM   
MarksFantasyGirl


Posts: 3660
Joined: 10/13/2005
Status: offline 		eat your foot...  you have 2.. you'd only need one....

I need a shower, but don't feel like going upstairs... What do I do?

_____________________________

--Fannie
AKA Savage's Fantasy
AKA Girl Dave
AKA Resident Flirt
AKA Sexy Hawt Woman

~*~Happily and proudly collared by my best friend~*~

Quitcher bitchen, and get out of the kitchen! ~Harry {3rdRock}

(in reply to JoyfulMistress)
Profile   Post #: 4969
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 10:16:48 AM   
JoyfulMistress


Posts: 628
Joined: 10/31/2007
Status: offline 		put your loved one who is slumbering beside you hand in warm water and use the stream to clean yourself .. no need to go upstairs now ....problem solved
 
I really want to see some snow but there is no chance of any around here anytime soon what should I do ?

(in reply to MarksFantasyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 4970
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 10:46:48 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		rub your husbands hair and watch the dandruff fall.

I want some roasted peaunts but the store is closed. What do I do.

(in reply to JoyfulMistress)
Profile   Post #: 4971
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 10:53:45 AM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline 		shameless attempts to get us to talk about roasting your nuts again Ray?

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 4972
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 12:18:36 PM   
JoyfulMistress


Posts: 628
Joined: 10/31/2007
Status: offline 		get a welding torch and with the torch lit drag it over your own nuts.....same thing
\
I need to vacume the carpet but the belt is broken in the vacume what should I do ?

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 4973
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 4:34:48 PM   
sappatoti


Posts: 14844
Joined: 10/30/2006
From: the edge of darkness...
Status: offline
Flood your house just enough so the carpet seems to float. Walk around on it to stir the dirt out of the fibers, then open the doors and squeegee out the water. The dirt will flow out with it.

There's a fox running around that won't leave the palm trees in the front yard alone. It keeps digging at the roots. How can I get the fox to leave the palm trees alone?


_____________________________

Never mind the man on the edge of the darkness... he means no harm...

"Community, Identity, Stability." ~ A Brave New World, Aldous Huxley, 1932

If you don't like my attitude, QUIT TALKING TO ME!

(in reply to JoyfulMistress)
Profile   Post #: 4974
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 5:27:58 PM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline 		Give it a chicken or
Get a skunk to build a den there

How do I get Master to clean the air handler coils?

poenkitten



(in reply to sappatoti)
Profile   Post #: 4975
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 7:25:17 PM   
JoyfulMistress


Posts: 628
Joined: 10/31/2007
Status: offline 		set em in the potty ... when he tinkles in the morning it will clean em right up
 
The neighbors are throwing a party .. and I want to kidnapp the clown .. how can I do it legally ?

(in reply to BlackPhx)
Profile   Post #: 4976
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:25:15 PM   
shivermetimbers


Posts: 2060
Joined: 6/7/2008
Status: offline 		Put up posters of you naked on a miniature bike in the front yard facing the neighbors house.

Airport security is always "randomly" picking my love's suitcase to inspect, and we suspect it was the toys she had in there.  What can we do to stop them from being nosey pervs?


_____________________________

I love you Deanna, you make every day a better day.

If we descended from monkeys and apes, why are there still monkeys and apes?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ3CJi0Ih9s&feature=player_embedded

http://www.thebuccozone.com/piratesong.htm

(in reply to JoyfulMistress)
Profile   Post #: 4977
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:29:01 PM   
JoyfulMistress


Posts: 628
Joined: 10/31/2007
Status: offline 		carry rancidand maggot filled  meat atop the toys .... they will not wish to be pervie ones after that ...
 
what fun can I do during *the witching hour*?

(in reply to shivermetimbers)
Profile   Post #: 4978
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:41:01 PM   
shivermetimbers


Posts: 2060
Joined: 6/7/2008
Status: offline 		Drink heavily, and drive really fast.

I ran out of milk for coffee and the stores are closed, what's a good substitute at this hour of night?

_____________________________

I love you Deanna, you make every day a better day.

If we descended from monkeys and apes, why are there still monkeys and apes?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ3CJi0Ih9s&feature=player_embedded

http://www.thebuccozone.com/piratesong.htm

(in reply to JoyfulMistress)
Profile   Post #: 4979
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 11/21/2008 9:45:20 PM   
RainydayNE


Posts: 978
Joined: 10/21/2008
Status: offline 		pee in a cup and TELL yourself it's milk
if you believe hard enough...


i have a friend who takes her contacts out by hand every night. is there an easier way?

(in reply to shivermetimbers)
Profile   Post #: 4980
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