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RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 12:25:11 PM

sappatoti

Posts: 14844
Joined: 10/30/2006
From: the edge of darkness...
Status: offline

Have a cook-out and invite all your naked friends over to share in the grilled steak.

I'm burning some serious brain fuel trying to decide who would win between the cartoon characters of the Tasmanian Devil or Stitch. Any thoughts on what would be a good beverage for me right about now?

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Post #: 5201

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 12:31:22 PM

Fitznicely

Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline

Coffee.....coffeecoffeecoffeecoffee

My condoms are too darn small - they keep popping off and flying across the bedroom...what can I do?

[edited for being too frikken slow]

< Message edited by Fitznicely -- 5/5/2009 12:37:41 PM >

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I tell you this: No eternal reward will forgive us now for wasting the dawn
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Post #: 5202

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 1:09:56 PM

DemonKia

Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline

Quit buying the finger cots -- they're not condoms!

lol

Seriously? Use some Super Glue . .... .

lol

I'm hungry, what should I eat ... . .

(in reply to Fitznicely)

Post #: 5203

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 1:13:42 PM

PALittleGirl

Posts: 31
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline

I've always found that wood makes a good snack.

I think my cat is a ninja who is trying to kill me. What should I do?

(in reply to DemonKia)

Post #: 5204

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 1:22:46 PM

sappatoti

Posts: 14844
Joined: 10/30/2006
From: the edge of darkness...
Status: offline

Have your cat role-play with the killer rabbit from Monty Python's "Holy Grail" flick. Then, step away for a few hours. Your cat should be quieted down after a bit.

My house is clean enough to be healthy but dirty enough to be happy. What do y'all think... am I a balanced individual?

_____________________________

Never mind the man on the edge of the darkness... he means no harm...

"Community, Identity, Stability." ~ A Brave New World, Aldous Huxley, 1932

If you don't like my attitude, QUIT TALKING TO ME!

(in reply to PALittleGirl)

Post #: 5205

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 1:32:03 PM

PALittleGirl

Posts: 31
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline

Walk around with a bubble level on your head for a few days and ask people to see if you are balanced.

I can't decide what to name the big stuffed sea turtle my Daddy bought me. What should I do?

(in reply to sappatoti)

Post #: 5206

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 1:32:51 PM

hejira92

Posts: 2272
Joined: 10/27/2005
From: Palm Beach County, Fl
Status: offline

No, because your mind is dirty enough for all humanity!

I'm hungry now, but I'm going out to dinner with friends in an hour. What should I do?

edited because I am not fast enough!

PAlittlegirl:

Name it killer.

< Message edited by hejira92 -- 5/5/2009 1:34:09 PM >

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Post #: 5207

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 1:41:30 PM

DemonKia

Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline

"Fuck Bunny", you should name your stuffed sea turtle, "Fuck Bunny" . . . . .

& hejira, you should take the 'Fuck Bunny' with you & introduce it as the meal . . . .

I sometimes want to use high-explosives to relieve my stress; what should I do about that?

< Message edited by DemonKia -- 5/5/2009 1:42:38 PM >

(in reply to hejira92)

Post #: 5208

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 1:49:55 PM

Fitznicely

Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline

Go right a-fucking-head!

I can't get the damn UM's to stay in bed. Tips?

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I tell you this: No eternal reward will forgive us now for wasting the dawn
Proud Owner of Darkmoonkat. Such a good girl!

(in reply to DemonKia)

Post #: 5209

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 1:53:49 PM

intenze

Posts: 2176
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

Benedryl.

I just want to curl up and sleep for a week...

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Namaste, bitches!

(in reply to Fitznicely)

Post #: 5210

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 1:57:40 PM

Fitznicely

Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline

Benedryl...or...chloroform

I'm running out of hard drive space. What should I delete first? Games or porn collection?

_____________________________

I tell you this: No eternal reward will forgive us now for wasting the dawn
Proud Owner of Darkmoonkat. Such a good girl!

(in reply to intenze)

Post #: 5211

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 1:59:48 PM

intenze

Posts: 2176
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

Put your porn on your work hard drive. They dont mind, really. They will love your games too, IMNSHO.

How can I get a slave boy to come spit shine my shoes, no strings?

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Namaste, bitches!

(in reply to Fitznicely)

Post #: 5212

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 2:03:24 PM

Fitznicely

Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline

Steal his shoelaces and check his pockets. You know how boys love string.

How do I get a slave girl to come spit shine my...boots, ropes attached...

_____________________________

I tell you this: No eternal reward will forgive us now for wasting the dawn
Proud Owner of Darkmoonkat. Such a good girl!

(in reply to intenze)

Post #: 5213

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 2:57:48 PM

fluffypet61

Posts: 28879
Joined: 12/25/2006
From: New Jersey
Status: offline

Let me give you my number...

How do i get time to fly for some things and go slowly for others?

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Post #: 5214

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 4:21:43 PM

sappatoti

Posts: 14844
Joined: 10/30/2006
From: the edge of darkness...
Status: offline

Consider coming up with and applying a practical application for the theory of anti-time progression that would allow you to do what you seek.

I have some crumpled, but clean linens sitting on the bed at the moment. They will go onto that bed later but I'm not sure if they should be ironed or pressed first. What do you all think?

_____________________________

Never mind the man on the edge of the darkness... he means no harm...

"Community, Identity, Stability." ~ A Brave New World, Aldous Huxley, 1932

If you don't like my attitude, QUIT TALKING TO ME!

(in reply to fluffypet61)

Post #: 5215

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 4:26:55 PM

pissthirstysub

Posts: 3901
Joined: 5/1/2008
Status: offline

Put them between two large books, it will be a quick way to do it
I want to go outside and read but I think the porch furniture is in poor repair.

(in reply to sappatoti)

Post #: 5216

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 4:40:40 PM

sappatoti

Posts: 14844
Joined: 10/30/2006
From: the edge of darkness...
Status: offline

Wait until dark and move the porch furniture into a pile on the lawn just off the porch. Set the pile on fire, sit on the porch steps with your book, and read by firelight.

My UPS (uninterruptible power supply) is honking its alarm because its battery is dying. What would be a good way to dispose of this acid-filled brick?

_____________________________

Never mind the man on the edge of the darkness... he means no harm...

"Community, Identity, Stability." ~ A Brave New World, Aldous Huxley, 1932

If you don't like my attitude, QUIT TALKING TO ME!

(in reply to pissthirstysub)

Post #: 5217

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 5:15:18 PM

thornhappy

Posts: 8596
Joined: 12/16/2006
Status: offline

Place it on the hood of your ex's car, and let the cats knock it over.

My top's laid up with a shoulder injury. How should I get my spanking fix?

(in reply to sappatoti)

Post #: 5218

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 5:22:51 PM

pissthirstysub

Posts: 3901
Joined: 5/1/2008
Status: offline

Spank tomatoes.
My favorite book was incinerated.

(in reply to thornhappy)

Post #: 5219

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 5/5/2009 5:48:56 PM

DeViLiVeD

Posts: 37
Joined: 1/5/2009
Status: offline

Go digital. Download ebook.

My dog is poo-ing everywhere... damn...

(in reply to pissthirstysub)

Post #: 5220

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