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thanks - 7/1/2010 5:12:11 PM

bestheadyet

Posts: 266
Joined: 2/3/2010
Status: offline

everyone (mostly) here has been so kind to me......

i wanted say thank you to all of you who in the last few days showed me what community is all about.

i obviously haven't learned the things i needed to ....to maintain my slavery.

i'm in shambles. i'll be ok....He was just unhappy with me....and i was too headstrong.
i wish i could start over.

Post #: 1

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:14:40 PM

DarlingSavage

Posts: 2808
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline

You're probably better off without him. He didn't sound like he was very concerned about your well being. I know it hurts now, but it'll get better.

xxx

_____________________________

<-- Easily amused.
<-- Easily impressed.

Strangers have the BEST candy!

Puppy dogs are my favorite people!

(in reply to bestheadyet)

Post #: 2

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:14:48 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

The beauty of life is, with most things you can start over. Learning to nuture and forgive yourself and place yourself in situations that are nuturing and forgiving is part of what makes us healthy adults.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to bestheadyet)

Post #: 3

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:16:45 PM

bestheadyet

Posts: 266
Joined: 2/3/2010
Status: offline

but i cant quit these crying jags.
i know ill be fine but ouch it really really hurts.

whats worse is its my fault.

i pushed til he snapped
its all my fault

< Message edited by bestheadyet -- 7/1/2010 5:18:40 PM >

(in reply to laurell3)

Post #: 4

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:18:38 PM

loverly

Posts: 236
Joined: 1/23/2004
Status: offline

you can Always start over again... its all a learning process and there will be LOTS of people in your journey... the important part is to learn.

This too shall pass.. and look how Far you've come !!!

< Message edited by loverly -- 7/1/2010 5:19:58 PM >

(in reply to bestheadyet)

Post #: 5

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:20:09 PM

zephyroftheNorth

Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline

I know it really hurts, but believe me it's just now not forever. Just take care of yourself that's the important thing right now.

_____________________________

And there's a smile when the pain comes
The pain gonna make ev'rything alright ~ Black Crows

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Member: Cocksuckers For World Peace
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(in reply to bestheadyet)

Post #: 6

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:21:25 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: bestheadyet

but i cant quit these crying jags.
i know ill be fine but ouch it really really hurts.

whats worse is its my fault.

i pushed til he snapped
its all my fault

Hon, that was a match made in hell, you couldn't have saved it. Crying is what we do when we grieve. This too shall pass.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to bestheadyet)

Post #: 7

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:21:30 PM

bestheadyet

Posts: 266
Joined: 2/3/2010
Status: offline

gonna go for a walk.....maybe that will help

(in reply to zephyroftheNorth)

Post #: 8

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:22:26 PM

DarlingSavage

Posts: 2808
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline

Don't take it so hard, I don't think it's your fault. He wasn't spending enough time with you in the first place, that was a red flag. It's not you, it's him. It'll get better. It will.

_____________________________

<-- Easily amused.
<-- Easily impressed.

Strangers have the BEST candy!

Puppy dogs are my favorite people!

(in reply to zephyroftheNorth)

Post #: 9

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:24:55 PM

zephyroftheNorth

Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline

Good idea, lying around focusing on it isn't a good thing. Have a good walk

_____________________________

And there's a smile when the pain comes
The pain gonna make ev'rything alright ~ Black Crows

Team Troll Trollop
Member: Cocksuckers For World Peace
Charter member: Lance's Fag Hags
Member: Subbie Mafia
Member: Hibbie's Hotties

(in reply to bestheadyet)

Post #: 10

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:26:49 PM

DarlingSavage

Posts: 2808
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline

Zephyr is right and if I was there, I would give you a big hug and let you cry on my shoulder, then I'd fix you some tea.

_____________________________

<-- Easily amused.
<-- Easily impressed.

Strangers have the BEST candy!

Puppy dogs are my favorite people!

(in reply to zephyroftheNorth)

Post #: 11

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:27:54 PM

zephyroftheNorth

Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline

quote:

its all my fault

No it isn't it's his fault. He was too stupid to know a great woman when he meets one. Somewhere out there is a man who won't make that mistake, you just haven't met him yet.......or maybe you have and he hasn't approached you because you were taken.

_____________________________

And there's a smile when the pain comes
The pain gonna make ev'rything alright ~ Black Crows

Team Troll Trollop
Member: Cocksuckers For World Peace
Charter member: Lance's Fag Hags
Member: Subbie Mafia
Member: Hibbie's Hotties

(in reply to bestheadyet)

Post #: 12

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:27:58 PM

LafayetteLady

Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: bestheadyet

but i cant quit these crying jags.
i know ill be fine but ouch it really really hurts.

whats worse is its my fault.

i pushed til he snapped
its all my fault

See that bold part up there? It goes with what you said in the last thread when you questioned what you "deserved."

Stay away from guys who thrive on the fact that you have not resolved these issues. They are bad for you.

Nothing was your fault. The relationship was bad, you were not compatible. You wanted more than he was willing to give, and it made you spend too much time trying to figure out what else you could do to make him happy.

The crying jags will stop. Things will get better. You will find better and then wonder why you ever cried over this one to begin with.

(in reply to bestheadyet)

Post #: 13

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:28:28 PM

marie2

Posts: 1690
Joined: 11/4/2008
From: Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarlingSavage

Don't take it so hard, I don't think it's your fault. He wasn't spending enough time with you in the first place, that was a red flag. It's not you, it's him. It'll get better. It will.

This is what I'm thinking too. Unless I misunderstood, you wrote something a couple of days ago to the affect that he was punishing you by withholding real time interaction. That is a cop out. And he has convinced you that it's all been your doing. You were too this and too that.

You were getting too close and he needed to push you back, and he took the weak-mans route. He put it all on your shoulders then sent you packing with a load of guilt and blame and regret to carry on your back.

I smell a married man.

And I think you swallowed the koolaid on this one.

(in reply to DarlingSavage)

Post #: 14

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:45:42 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline

Don't beat yourself up.

Take a walk, have a good cry, do something nice and kind for yourself, and then when you're ready pick yourself back up, dust yourself off, and go out there again, hopefully a little smarter and a little wiser, and pick someone who's deserving of you and what you're offering.

(in reply to marie2)

Post #: 15

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:49:25 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

quote:

ORIGINAL: bestheadyet

but i cant quit these crying jags.
i know ill be fine but ouch it really really hurts.

whats worse is its my fault.

i pushed til he snapped
its all my fault

See that bold part up there? It goes with what you said in the last thread when you questioned what you "deserved."

Stay away from guys who thrive on the fact that you have not resolved these issues. They are bad for you.

Nothing was your fault. The relationship was bad, you were not compatible. You wanted more than he was willing to give, and it made you spend too much time trying to figure out what else you could do to make him happy.

The crying jags will stop. Things will get better. You will find better and then wonder why you ever cried over this one to begin with.

I agree, I doubt she can see it coming. I hate to suggest a "protector" because I think they're mostly bullshit. But I do think she needs someone or a couple someones she trusts to run things by outside of posting on the forums that can help her distinguish between role and just flat out bullshit.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to LafayetteLady)

Post #: 16

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:51:02 PM

divi

Posts: 11109
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline

I want a protector who will watch me.. I've been getting some nasty mail ...

_____________________________

( imho )

I really could use a wish right now

(in reply to laurell3)

Post #: 17

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:52:00 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: divi

I want a protector who will watch me.. I've been getting some nasty mail ...

I'll protect you divi! lol...I would so suck at it, I'm a picky bitch!

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to divi)

Post #: 18

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:52:54 PM

ElizabethAnne

Posts: 1751
Status: offline

Hello,

I'm glad to see you taking the responsibility for what you did wrong. Too many people don't, and always want to blame someone else. You admitted you misbehaved, you've admitted it's your fault, you've admitted you pushed him to where he snapped, it shows real maturity to own up to what you did, good for you. Hell no one likes to fail, now - pick yourself up, learn from it, go on.

Take care,

Elizabeth

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)

Post #: 19

RE: thanks - 7/1/2010 5:54:12 PM

divi

Posts: 11109
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

quote:

ORIGINAL: divi

I want a protector who will watch me.. I've been getting some nasty mail ...

I'll protect you divi! lol...I would so suck at it, I'm a picky bitch!

aww ty laurell my sweets! Seriously I'm in awe of moronic messages I've been getting

_____________________________

( imho )

I really could use a wish right now

(in reply to laurell3)

Post #: 20

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