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Why slavery? - 7/4/2010 9:17:54 AM

whipmaker7

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Why do some people want to become actual slaves?

Is it always for sexual reasons? Is that always the common denominator?

I'm not ruling out sexuality as a "bad" motive. I'm just wondering if human sexuality is really at the base of everything in the end. I know the term 'slave' isn't set in stone either, but when I mention slavery I mean the practice of surrendering your life to another person and really serving them... and not just in a 'scene' capacity.

I hope to make it clear I'm not talking about topping and bottoming. I would like people who are experienced with being slaves or even owning slaves to express their thoughts about m&s... is it all about sexual energy in the end, or is it something else and/or more than that? Thanks for reading.

Post #: 1

RE: Why slavery? - 7/4/2010 9:29:52 AM

LadyPact

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I don't think it's always based on sexual reasons. I believe the ownership factor can play a huge role for some.

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RE: Why slavery? - 7/4/2010 9:33:54 AM

DesFIP

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That's like assuming people only get married because of sex. Humans are not that simple. Different people have different motives and most of us have complex mixes of emotions and past issues that cause us to choose what we do. More importantly, the answer for one is not universally true for all.

And for most, it's situationally specific. I'm submissive to one. I'm 55 years old and in all my life this is the only man I have met I have felt safe turning control over to. Should this relationship end, I doubt I would meet someone else I would submit to.

And I can have sex without allowing him to decide what I buy or what we're doing for dinner and so on.

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RE: Why slavery? - 7/4/2010 9:36:10 AM

lobodomslavery

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its like some like marmalade and some like jam some like cornflakes, and some like rice crispies. Some like to be Domme and some like to be sub and some like to be both which is switch. And then some like to be slave which is a more subservient version of sub where it is an authority dynamic and unowned slave where it is not
kevin

(in reply to whipmaker7)

Post #: 4

RE: Why slavery? - 7/4/2010 2:57:09 PM

lally2

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it really has no more sexual bias than any other type of relationship - you cant be horny 24/7 and it was no different on the sexual side to Ds. its simply a way that people relate to each other.

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Post #: 5

RE: Why slavery? - 7/4/2010 3:16:37 PM

littlewonder

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Mine isn't a sexual reason.

I'm his slave because I like being owned by him. I like a relationship where I don't always have to give consent. I can give it once and leave the rest up to him. I like being of service to him. I like knowing the choice is his and not mine in whatever it may be.

(in reply to lally2)

Post #: 6

RE: Why slavery? - 7/4/2010 3:28:51 PM

dreamerdreaming

Posts: 2839
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For the second time today: Owner/slave is an orientation. Its WAAAAY more than sexual. To think its only, or even mostly a sexual thing, would be to completely miss the point.

Why anything?!

Because it feels right.

Fish gotta swim. Birds gotta fly. We gotta be who we are, or we're wasting the chance.

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RE: Why slavery? - 7/4/2010 5:11:03 PM

tazzygirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: whipmaker7

Why do some people want to become actual slaves?

Is it always for sexual reasons? Is that always the common denominator?

I think you are asking the wrong question. You assume all of us want to be slaves. I never wanted to be a slave... but boy did i become one.

quote:

is it all about sexual energy in the end, or is it something else and/or more than that?

It is about sexual engery... but that isnt the be all end all.

It has nothing to do with wanting, at least for me. It has to do with what is natural for the relationship. The natural dominance wiill call for the natural submission... and that level can sometimes deepen to slavery. For some, its all sexual. For others like me, it isnt. Sex, in my relationships, is an extension of my feelings, my devotion, not something i do just to "get off".

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RE: Why slavery? - 7/4/2010 7:13:37 PM

Zevar

Posts: 801
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quote:

ORIGINAL: whipmaker7

Why do some people want to become actual slaves?

Is it always for sexual reasons? Is that always the common denominator?

I'm not ruling out sexuality as a "bad" motive. I'm just wondering if human sexuality is really at the base of everything in the end. I know the term 'slave' isn't set in stone either, but when I mention slavery I mean the practice of surrendering your life to another person and really serving them... and not just in a 'scene' capacity.

I hope to make it clear I'm not talking about topping and bottoming. I would like people who are experienced with being slaves or even owning slaves to express their thoughts about m&s... is it all about sexual energy in the end, or is it something else and/or more than that? Thanks for reading.

Consensual slavery, or another term is servant-hood of one to another, is not something that someone decides to “become” at least not for the one that innately serves with their whole heart, mind, soul and body. Sexuality has nothing to do with serving another at all. Sexuality is the same as sexual orientation.

To propose that slavery is solely rooted in sexual desires is not innate consensual slavery at all. There is within some an innate desire that can only be reconciled by means of an internal enslavement. Thus the beauty that is inerrant in consensual slavery is forthcoming in a manner that produces a sense of completion for the one who naturally serves in all ways not just sexually.

Deriving sexual fulfillment from the context of consensual slavery is not related to the orientation that one identifies as. It is accurate that sexual desires can be gratified within a consensual exchange yet the climatic release is not the goal for one who serves in manner that is related to consensual slavery. Those who serve with a conditional motive to solely attain sexual gratification for there slavery is unrelated to any form of slavery. There are those who must serve from an innate desire that is also a natural integrated aspect of how they identify.

Sexualizing slavery is in a sense confusing the foundational reasoning behind those who serve in a manner that reaches into every aspect of all they do on a daily basis. This is true for those who serve in a manner that is as refined as the petal of a rose saturated with droplets of water that interchanging emit beauty into every expression of servitude.

I speak from my experience in how this has been proven to be true in the servitude that has been expressed toward myself. But then not every experience or opinion defines servitude of consensual slavery for all. I say, to each man his own undeniably so. Then there is the subject of ownership and how it effects this topic. Surely ownership is not solely related to sexual pleasures or sexual motives. If so then I disagree that it is indeed the form of ownership that is required for the one who innately offers the beauty of servitude in all that she does. IMO that is...

< Message edited by Zevar -- 7/4/2010 7:22:44 PM >

(in reply to whipmaker7)

Post #: 9

RE: Why slavery? - 7/4/2010 8:56:49 PM

CaringandReal

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For me, it's about 90% sexual. But I think I handle the other 10% rather well. ;)

Seriously, for me there's always, no matter what I am doing or thinking, a low-level sexual tension present when I am in this sort of relationship. The constant erotic awareness of myself as an owned object has no equivelent in my vanilla experiences.

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Post #: 10

RE: Why slavery? - 7/5/2010 8:30:09 AM

LPslittleclip

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for me it is the level of commitment and service and not sex for me. i enjoy the feeling of volentarily surendering to someone that cares and will guide/protect/train me.

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LadyPact

(in reply to CaringandReal)

Post #: 11

RE: Why slavery? - 7/5/2010 11:16:42 AM

whipmaker7

Posts: 82
Joined: 4/30/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I don't think it's always based on sexual reasons. I believe the ownership factor can play a huge role for some.

I agree, but the question that still nags me is this: would clip be yours if you were male or terribly ugly?

He writes that it's not about sex for him, but about surrendering to someone who will guide and train him. now I don't knock the guiding and training part, but if that was all there was to it, why not just submit to anyone who would be good for the job?

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 12

RE: Why slavery? - 7/5/2010 11:18:27 AM

whipmaker7

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Joined: 4/30/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

That's like assuming people only get married because of sex.

Well, in a way... it is about sex.

Marriage is about creating children and protecting bloodlines, which inevitably involves sex. I'm not saying sex is everything there is to it, but it's a major cog that puts males and females together, wouldn't you say?

I'm not trying to be thick-headed, just trying to clarify what I mean. I'm not talking about just getting off.. I'm talking about the more subtle energies… not just sex as the act but sex as the process, or source of drive.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 13

RE: Why slavery? - 7/5/2010 11:22:02 AM

whipmaker7

Posts: 82
Joined: 4/30/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Mine isn't a sexual reason.

I'm his slave because I like being owned by him.

Could you clarify that a little?

Specifically, what makes you like being owned by a man so much? are the sexes interchangeable in this then? Does gender, physical appeal and plumbing have zilch to do with it?

I ask these questions because I've been thinking about this a lot, and I haven't come to a conclusive answer... but I thought maybe someone on the board might be able to shoot this one down for me. You know, a eureka moment from the way someone puts it that goes beyond 'all sorts of reasons.'

< Message edited by whipmaker7 -- 7/5/2010 11:33:09 AM >

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 14

RE: Why slavery? - 7/5/2010 11:25:37 AM

whipmaker7

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Joined: 4/30/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

It is about sexual engery... but that isnt the be all end all.

Isn't that a bit of a contradiction? If you say 'it's about sexual energy' or sexuality, doesn't that sum it up, overall when you get into the guts of things?

I liked your point of view about not seeking it, but finding slavery nonetheless. One thing I found I need to clarify however is that I'm not just talking about 'getting off.' Sex goes far, far beyond that... wouldn't you agree?

(in reply to tazzygirl)

Post #: 15

RE: Why slavery? - 7/5/2010 11:28:57 AM

whipmaker7

Posts: 82
Joined: 4/30/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CaringandReal

For me, it's about 90% sexual. But I think I handle the other 10% rather well. ;)

Seriously, for me there's always, no matter what I am doing or thinking, a low-level sexual tension present when I am in this sort of relationship. The constant erotic awareness of myself as an owned object has no equivelent in my vanilla experiences.

That's sort of where I got tired of thinking and just decided to conclude loosely.

I like your use of 'erotic awareness'. unfortunately I think a lot of people see that as always being wet or having a dripping hard-on. Its much more subtle than that, by the way I see it. That's where I'm trying to go with this... not just sex acts.

(in reply to CaringandReal)

Post #: 16

RE: Why slavery? - 7/5/2010 1:08:04 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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quote:

ORIGINAL: whipmaker7

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I don't think it's always based on sexual reasons. I believe the ownership factor can play a huge role for some.

I agree, but the question that still nags me is this: would clip be yours if you were male or terribly ugly?

He writes that it's not about sex for him, but about surrendering to someone who will guide and train him. now I don't knock the guiding and training part, but if that was all there was to it, why not just submit to anyone who would be good for the job?

Who says that I'm not terribly ugly?

Seriously. How do you know? You might find Me physically unattractive, but if you don't know Me, how do you know that I'm not beautiful inside?

That thing, that inspiration, might just be the most beautiful thing that someone might ever know. Those aren't things that you can explain. It just happens.

Something that, I assure you, I am glad for each day.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to whipmaker7)

Post #: 17

RE: Why slavery? - 7/5/2010 2:47:32 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
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quote:

ORIGINAL: whipmaker7

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Mine isn't a sexual reason.

I'm his slave because I like being owned by him.

Could you clarify that a little?

Specifically, what makes you like being owned by a man so much? are the sexes interchangeable in this then? Does gender, physical appeal and plumbing have zilch to do with it?

I ask these questions because I've been thinking about this a lot, and I haven't come to a conclusive answer... but I thought maybe someone on the board might be able to shoot this one down for me. You know, a eureka moment from the way someone puts it that goes beyond 'all sorts of reasons.'

I am completely monogamous and seek only long term committed relationships. I don't do casual playing so yes the gender has a lot to do with it since I'm straight and not interested in women at all and I don't want a relationship with a woman or with a man who only wants to play casually.

The sex part is just part of a normal healthy relationship for me. It has nothing to do with why I wish to be owned by him, why I adore serving and surrendering to him.

I am simply built to desire a man who is a dominant personality and who wants the same things in life that I do. A man who can give me everything I ever wanted in life is a man I would do absolutely anything for and therefore I would be his slave.

Thankfully I found such a man...a man who makes me happier than I think I've ever been in my life.

(in reply to whipmaker7)

Post #: 18

RE: Why slavery? - 7/5/2010 5:41:13 PM

sublizzie

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I could be a slave to a female dominant but I prefer to have a relationship with a man so that I can add sexual slavery to my relationship as well. It does not have to be a sexual relationship for me to be a slave to someone, but the sex adds a lovely frosting to the cake.

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Post #: 19

RE: Why slavery? - 7/5/2010 6:00:21 PM

HisEvelyn

Posts: 252
Joined: 1/21/2010
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I chose to be submissive to my Master because I was attracted to him, the man he is and the opportunities he offered me. This was primarily sexual.

As time went on, I became his slave. This was not a choice so much as a natural progression of who I am, and had very little to do with sexuality. To serve and please him brings me satisfaction on all possible levels. There will always be a sexual component, as there always is to separate a simple friendship from a romantic relationship. But I feel that to serve him in everyday matters, to give him the essence of who I am as a person? Transcends merely physical desire.

Though physical expression of that is beautifully human. :)

(in reply to sublizzie)

Post #: 20

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