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RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 9:59:58 AM   
RCdc


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Firebirdseeking

You know, at some point one should distinguish between reality and fantasy.


I believe that depends on how far a persons fantasies extend.  For some, marriage is a fantasy, but it can become a reality.  Being owned could be classed as a fantasy, whether online or meatlife.  Once it comes into fruition, what then?  People have had relationships over distance by the written word for years, it isn't anything new.

the.dark.

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RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 10:06:00 AM   
DaddysInkedSlut


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Firebirdseeking

You know, at some point one should distinguish between reality and fantasy.



Who determines what is real and what is fantasy?

What about those relationships that start out real life and due to situations our of their control have to go online are they any less real?

< Message edited by DaddysInkedSlut -- 7/5/2010 10:07:40 AM >


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RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 10:07:48 AM   
zephyroftheNorth


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddysInkedSlut


quote:

ORIGINAL: Firebirdseeking

You know, at some point one should distinguish between reality and fantasy.



Who determines who is real and what is fantasy?

What about those relationships that start out real life and due to situations our of their control have to go online are they any less real?


Or, due to the two partners living far apart, are mostly online?

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 10:10:17 AM   
DaddysInkedSlut


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quote:

ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth

Or, due to the two partners living far apart, are mostly online?



That is my realtionship with Daddy at this point he lives 3.5 hours away sometimes it takes 4 hours due to traffic. Plus he works 50 hour weeks on a slow week so we can't always be with each other. So we utalize online and speak via emails, vidoe phone calls, instanst messenger ect.

< Message edited by DaddysInkedSlut -- 7/5/2010 10:14:39 AM >


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RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 10:22:03 AM   
BentUnit


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When I was diagnosed as pos. HSV and my Master decided he couldn't touch me, for his and his primaries sake chances are I would have accepted a on-line only relationship if only to keep a small flame of the relationship alive.

We tried it.
He released me beacuse our on-line life kept lapsing into real time speak (as we were use to to) ...mudidng the waters.
He'd talk in present time speak..it would give me hope he had decided I was touchable...I'd question him in the morning to be met with the answer it was just fantasy.

In these instances On-line doesn't work.
In spite of this I refuse to believe that it can't work if both parties are HONEST.

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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 12:02:30 PM   
laurell3


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I should mention here that one the happiest days of my life was the 24 hours that I was online collared to Stephen (whom I really don't know), in my mailbox (after Jeff gave me away to him)!



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When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 12:09:02 PM   
sirsholly


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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

I should mention here that one the happiest days of my life was the 24 hours that I was online collared to Stephen (whom I really don't know), in my mailbox (after Jeff gave me away to him)!


Laurell...honey.....this isn't sayin' a hell of a whole lot for Jeffff...if you know what i mean.


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RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 12:11:52 PM   
laurell3


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I cried then released myself (into the wild). I should mention though that the only reason I accepted the collar is because I was able to negotiate Stephen from a dollar store collar up to a sparkly one from Target! (or was it Wal-Mart...).

< Message edited by laurell3 -- 7/5/2010 12:13:47 PM >


_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 12:14:07 PM   
lusciouslips19


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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

I cried then released myself (into the wild).


*sheds one tear

Reminds me of Born Free...

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Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 12:34:34 PM   
Lockit


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Life changes and so should we bend and flow with it or we break. What works for one will not work for another. Does that negate how real the experience was or is for anyone? I am sure there are many that feel I am diluting the purity of bdsm or d/s concept or life. Do I care? Well maybe in a sense that they feel that I could effect their life in such a way, but basically... no. They have their life and I have mine. Some would feel I should have no say or opinion on some things that I might not be involved in, but I do sometimes because some things cross over into other things. So I am not a sadist... for the most part... lol I am a dominant woman who expects to live her life as a dominant woman in any relationship past or present or to come. Because I am not in a relationship, does that mean I am not a dominant woman and shouldn't have an opinion or place in the so called community? Or because I may not be as kinky as others, somehow I am less? Or how about the fact that I am isolated and don't get out to do the public thing? Am I less anything because of it?

There are times I look at a collar as a play time experience. Other times I look at it as a symbol of how I feel about someone or even to the point of a marriage. It all depends on the situation and the people. I do laugh in a sad sort of way when people jump into a conversation with someone and are collared by the end of it. But then... what about a connection that two people can feel without ever having met? I have been there.

I have a dear someone in my life that I met online who lives in Australia. From first sight of pictures we felt a connection. We went to email and then messenger and started seeing that we were different genders of basically the same person. Twins of another mother so to speak. When I had troubles he could feel I was having troubles and I was the same way with him. For years we could feel when the other was struggling with something or tender moments between the two of us. We had never met, but in our spirits you could never have proven that because we were so in-tune to one another and still are many, many years later.

I choose to bend and flow and if what I want to do is an ideal and cannot do it, then I may need to do something else. I never thought I would be online to do anything but send out manuscripts or advocate as I once did. I never thought I would do any sort of online dating ritual as I had a full life in person. Life changed and I changed with it and it will continue to change. If I have a set ideal, I am going to break.


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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 12:43:28 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
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From: Quietville
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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

I cried then released myself (into the wild). I should mention though that the only reason I accepted the collar is because I was able to negotiate Stephen from a dollar store collar up to a sparkly one from Target! (or was it Wal-Mart...).
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19


*sheds one tear

Reminds me of Born Free...
Not surprised, Lushy...

Hey Laurell...Elsa called. She wants her collar back.

Damn....next time, ask to see a receipt!


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GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 1:02:24 PM   
Murin


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Mayhaps I was a bit harsh in throwing out that online collars are joke, but allow Me to redefine that. I was fairly tired when I wrote that OP and may have not been thinking as clearly as I should have been.

Alot of the times I have seen (mainly on AirG) online collars and the concept of them made into a joke. I lost track of the number of times that I saw a girl be collared to a Master only to find out she was "collar-stacking" by this I mean it came to light that in additiion to the screen name she was collared to the first Master under she had other screen names where she was collared to other Masters. Now truly I don't get all neo-nazi about it when I see that people are engaged in the practice of online collaring. I should note that it is a matter of presonal preference I believe. Let Me say this that the word "stance" was probably too strong a word to use. Its just something that was eating away at Me for some number of months.

Now I have seen instances where online collars have worked, as shown by the people who have replied to this thread who it worked or works for them. Bravo to you all for being able to do it, I fear I wouldn't be able to find the same peace of mind in it however. Maybe its just from the harshness of My own personal experiences as well which leads Me back to the saying that what doesn't kill Me only makes Me stronger. I know that I could never engage in the practice again but that is a matter of personal choice.

don't get Me wrong I am not criticizing those who engage in it (if it works for them so much the better). I've seen alot of things happen besides My own experiences which gives Me pause when I witness an online collaring. I point back to what I said originally about the themes applied of Love and Trust, body, soul and mind. I just fail to see how anyone can tell someone that they love them if they have never met them. I've been on the other side of the screen as it were. While it felt good that someone claimed they loved Me even though they didn't really know Me, I did find Myself wanting much more. In many cases in My experiences, I put Myself out there only to get hurt. I realize that the chances we all take involving any sort of relationship could always backfire, but I'm prone to believe that basic human nature is a better thing than that. Maybe I am just a fool in believing that but I would hope that My faith in Mankind wouldn't be tarnished by the callous actions of others. Or maybe its just My tough luck. *shrugs*

I do note however that no one made a comment on the gorean bit about the sins of the past being washed away by the collar (or maybe I just missed it?) I've heard that expression used in BDSM as well as Gor. I still think that there is a double standard when it comes to that. For example, Raigar was a good guy all the way around just wanted to expand his horizons so to speak. I knew him quite well in fact before he got into Gor. When the shit hit the fan with him in Tabor he pointed out the double standard and he was told that it didn't matter. Now here's My thought. How can those that attacked Him honestly sit there and tell him that any sort of double standard is okay?

Are Dominants expected to be perfect? Of course not, no one is and I indeed will be the first to tell anyone I am flawed. I would expect that transgressions could be forgiven. Again maybe it was just because they didn't like Raigar in the first place, but I should note that He became an outcast from the gorean community on AirG shortly thereafter even though He did not push the matter any further. He realized that no matter what he did, people would believe the worst about Him. He ended up changing His screen name and returning back to His original methods. A loss of the gorean community on AirG because He was very knowledgeable, but yet a gain for others because he brought that knowledge and wisdom to others.

thanks for the great replies folks.

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 1:09:45 PM   
LadyPact


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I think you have spent entirely too much time on an online forum to complain about an online forum.

Those are My thoughts.  Take them as you will.


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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 1:19:46 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Murin
I do note however that no one made a comment on the gorean bit about the sins of the past being washed away by the collar (or maybe I just missed it?) I've heard that expression used in BDSM as well as Gor. I still think that there is a double standard when it comes to that. For example, Raigar was a good guy all the way around just wanted to expand his horizons so to speak. I knew him quite well in fact before he got into Gor. When the shit hit the fan with him in Tabor he pointed out the double standard and he was told that it didn't matter. Now here's My thought. How can those that attacked Him honestly sit there and tell him that any sort of double standard is okay?

Are Dominants expected to be perfect? Of course not, no one is and I indeed will be the first to tell anyone I am flawed. I would expect that transgressions could be forgiven. Again maybe it was just because they didn't like Raigar in the first place, but I should note that He became an outcast from the gorean community on AirG shortly thereafter even though He did not push the matter any further. He realized that no matter what he did, people would believe the worst about Him. He ended up changing His screen name and returning back to His original methods. A loss of the gorean community on AirG because He was very knowledgeable, but yet a gain for others because he brought that knowledge and wisdom to others.

thanks for the great replies folks.


This isn't the gorean forum for one, you are more likely to get ridicule or people who do not understand gorean concepts here.
But who is this you are on about?  A character in the gor books or some person you have met in a chat room?

the.dark.

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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 2:01:29 PM   
DarkSteven


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Joined: 5/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

I should mention here that the happiest day of my life was the 24 hours that I was online collared to Steven (whom I really don't know), in my mailbox (after Jeff gave me away to him)!




quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

I cried then released myself (into the wild). I should mention though that the only reason I accepted the collar is because I was able to realize that Steven was a true Dominant.


Fixed.


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The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 2:06:50 PM   
KatyLied


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Laurell was fake collared to Steven? I am soooo jealous. 

::pouts::


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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 2:20:50 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Murin

Mayhaps I was a bit harsh in throwing out that online collars are joke


Stick to your guns. Don't cave to these online fucks. They are barely "real" people and their opinions should mean little.

You don't owe them shit.

Seriously this type of post might help some dumb chick in Iowa who is told hat this is the way that it works out here.

Online collars have the same effect as getting killed playing Call of Duty. Nothing has really transpired.

Except when you get killed playing Call of Duty you rarely get wide open gash pics forwarded.

< Message edited by domiguy -- 7/5/2010 2:22:01 PM >


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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 3:11:16 PM   
VAcontroldom


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Domiguy, you got a business idea there. But maybe flip it and after you make the kill in Call of Duty you automatically get the pictures forwarded. This can be a productive thread

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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 3:23:50 PM   
laurell3


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Joined: 5/5/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

I should mention here that the happiest day of my life was the 24 hours that I was online collared to Steven (whom I really don't know), in my mailbox (after Jeff gave me away to him)!




quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

I cried then released myself (into the wild). I should mention though that the only reason I accepted the collar is because I was able to realize that Steven was a true Dominant.


Fixed.



HAHA sorry....you'd think that after our memorable day I'd know how to spell your name!!! LOL

I totally could have worked my way up to Tiffany's by the way, I'm just not that greedy! (besides it wouldn't match my faded blue jeans and tennis shoes).

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Online collars - 7/5/2010 3:25:38 PM   
laurell3


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Joined: 5/5/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

Laurell was fake collared to Steven? I am soooo jealous. 

::pouts::




IT WAS REAL KATY!! How dare you undermine the significance of my short mailbox relationship!

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 40
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