RE: Redirecting the Flow

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RE: Redirecting the Flow - 8/5/2010 10:15:53 AM

Lockit

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I've gotten a lot of compliments my whole life and the one I remember most wasn't what was said the most, but the one thing that was said the least. I will never forget it and it turns me on to this day. Because the man saw more than my womanly assets and charms. He saw the whole of me. He said: I'm in love with your mind. He wasn't the only one, but was the first and will be the most remembered because it was such a shock to hear after all those physical compliments I got.

That is a man who can see past the once thin, young looking woman who could turn heads and effect change in a room full of people, that was common place... typical.

When giving a speech I could effect a change in most every person in the room, women included. While walking into a room and seeing heads turn, comments made and the lust of many a man, you know what stands out most in my mind and means far more? The time when giving a speech for something that really mattered and watching the faces of people in that room change from some interest to tears and laughter because of what I said and then standing as a group and clapping. That didn't distract from anyone being attracted to me because many were... but they were also attracted because of my brain, my thoughts, my heart, what motivated me and the change I was trying to achieve in motivating them to join me.

Now that is totally sexy to me! They first paid attention because I was an attractive woman... but I was more than an attractive woman that was trying to sell them on something... I was an attractive woman with something of worth to say. Sure the kudos on being blessed with some attractiveness is appreciated by me, but... as I age and lose that youthfulness and that thin body changes... I'm very glad that isn't all I had.

It's about balance and I want balance in my life and relationships. You bet somebodies sweet ass I want to be desired by someone, but even more, I want him kneeling beside me falling in love with my mind and thinking that is as important as anything else I might have.

My dominance includes sexual energy, but it is not made up of sexual energy alone. It is only a part of it. Because most men will see me as a sexual energy alone, doesn't make me less and because I don't want that doesn't mean I can't wrap a man around my finger, keep him energized in numerous ways and bend his mind. It simply means it will take an above average man who wants more than a sexy body, energy and physical enticements. He wants more, just as I do.

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RE: Redirecting the Flow - 8/5/2010 11:43:24 AM

KurtAllen

Posts: 40
Joined: 7/9/2010
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quote:

I don't think anyone was trying to say men are mindless. I am certainly not saying that. As human beings, we have well developed brains. We are not totally at the mercy of our appetites. But let's not go to the other extreme and pretend that those appetites have ceased to exist and influence us greatly.

First I want to thank you for the sharing of your thoughts and opinions and although I disagree with both you and locket I believe there is common ground for agreement if the root of the disagreement were viewed differently.

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RE: Redirecting the Flow - 8/5/2010 11:50:09 AM

Lockit

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quote:

ORIGINAL: KurtAllen

quote:

I don't think anyone was trying to say men are mindless. I am certainly not saying that. As human beings, we have well developed brains. We are not totally at the mercy of our appetites. But let's not go to the other extreme and pretend that those appetites have ceased to exist and influence us greatly.

First I want to thank you for the sharing of your thoughts and opinions and although I disagree with both you and locket I believe there is common ground for agreement if the root of the disagreement were viewed differently.

Well? Are you going to explain what you mean?

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RE: Redirecting the Flow - 8/8/2010 9:51:55 AM

Dnomyar

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Im with Lockit. What the hell did you just say???

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RE: Redirecting the Flow - 8/9/2010 2:17:48 AM

MaamJay

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Joined: 9/2/2005
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Firstly, I don't believe submission by all males is solely grounded in sexual energy. I have met a number of male subs who were motivated by a sense of devotion, for whom anything too sexual was distracting rather than motivating.

Secondly, I have absolutely no intention of becoming a slave to anyone's cock ... not even Master's LOL! He is also not solely motivated by sexual energy, far from it in fact. He is mind oriented rather than body oriented. Fortunately for me i am likewise, that's why we mesh so well. I am a mind oriented Domme too, so I am looking for a sub that is driven by his mind's desires and his heart's desires, for whom the cock comes in third.

Thirdly, having played with some subs who ARE cock-driven, without exception, I felt used and abused at the end of it. Because once they were allowed to cum (which pleases Me as I am a voyeur) it was as if their submissive switch flicked to OFF and they weren't interested in any form of service or obedience and some just were wanting to leave, showing signs of embarrassment that they had actually done what they had done whilst under the influence of their cocks! I didn't get MY payoff, which from play is the sharing, the intimacy, the aftercare and the male wanting to serve Me, help Me with whatever I want done etc. I know I do NOT want someone whose submission is only triggered by denial. I am a sexual woman and don't want to be in denial because he is LOL! Neither do I want to use some other bull for sex and keep this other thing hanging around. Why keep a cock in the house and not use it? So if he's going to be a nonsub every time I let him cum ... he's not much bloody use to Me.

Fourthly, IF I choose to control a man's orgasms, then he bloody well ought to do as I SAY. So if I say "No masturbation" ... that should be sufficient to keep his hands off it. If he needs some silly device, then he is totally weak willed and that doesn't excite Me at all either. If I tell him he is allowed to masturbate Weds and Sundays then that is what he is to do. Not get to Weds and think "oh i'm tired, i'll do it tomorrow" or get to Sat and think "oh i'm really desperate, i'll do it a day early". Just DO as I SAY ... is that so hard??

And finally, if it was all sexual energy being refocused into submission ... what happens in old age when that sexual energy wanes? Does he then lapse into a grumpy dysfunctional vanilla who resents all the time he lost and the orgasms he missed out on while he was locked up? I sure wouldn't want HIM around caring for Me in My old age!!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: Redirecting the Flow - 8/9/2010 6:56:37 AM

slavekal

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Just because male submission comes from sexual energy does not mean that obedience ends once a man comes.
This whole thing is sexual. If it were not, this would not be an adults only forum. If it were not sexual, then straight men would be licking men's boots as well as women's. If it weren't sexual, profile pics would not be taken in sexy fetish gear or nude/semi nude.
As far as age goes, there are some old guys who still pay pro dommes. But even when physical energy wanes, the psychological still comes from sexuality. I don't care what anyone says, what we are doing here is sexual. If it isn't, why don't you let your kids watch or participate? You don't because it is sexual, and it would be inappropriate to involve kids in your sexual life.

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RE: Redirecting the Flow - 8/9/2010 11:17:49 AM

attendedone

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MaamJay,
Your words really resonate with me--everything from following directions to not having the switch turn off after a man cums. Nothing more exciting than a man who can serve me, under any circumstance and find himself loving it!

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Post #: 67