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What is a Munch?? - 8/11/2010 3:17:58 PM   
travisaj1986


Posts: 10
Joined: 8/9/2010
Status: offline 		So obviously im pretty new to this whole thing, at least in terms of getting involved with it in real life. I am trying to get involved in my local BDSM community Portland/Vancouver, and have read online that Munches are a great way to get involved and meet people. I have never been to one of these before I was just curious about what to expect, what types of people, dress format, what is ok to talk about, how to introduce myself, how structured they are etc.

Also if anyone local happens to know of some good ones I can attend, that would be great!

Thanks in advance for everyones help!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/11/2010 3:58:24 PM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		They are meet & greets usually held at a local restaurant or pub where everyone gets together over food and/or drinks. They are generally pretty laid back, low prootocol events. Dress is usually casual...whatever you would normally wear to dinner at your local Applebee's will do. People attending are not outwardly "kinky" and it would be hard to tell the kinksters from any of the other patrons unless you know them.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to travisaj1986)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/11/2010 4:51:54 PM   
mstrjx


Posts: 2045
Joined: 11/27/2005
Status: offline 		...... and rarely is anything interesting talked about.

Sorry. Couldn't help myself.

Jeff

_____________________________

Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/11/2010 5:02:54 PM   
sublizzie


Posts: 1252
Joined: 5/26/2004
Status: offline 		Some munches are more interesting than others; some months' munches are more interesting than others. I've been to munches that have been in the middle of a family restaurant so the discussion was very "vanilla" and family-friendly. I've been to other munches that were in a private, enclosed room within a restaurant where kinky stuff was discussed. It just depends on the munch. Either way, normal, vanilla street-friendly clothing was appropriate.

_____________________________

"cooking is my kink"

Collared June 19, 2008
(uncollared 12/21/09 with his death. RIP my Santa)

(in reply to mstrjx)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/11/2010 5:54:25 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		A munch is basically dinner in a vanilla location.  It's just like any other group with a common interest that gets together to socialize.  Many groups will ask that those attending leave the fetish wear at home.  Conversation (unless it's specifically a topic/discussion munch) can be anything that people want to talk about.

Best course of action.  Contact the munch organizer and explain that you are new.  That way, you can be introduced to folks if the group doesn't do round table introductions.

Have fun and enjoy your first munch.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to sublizzie)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/11/2010 6:46:18 PM   
TheHeretic


Posts: 19100
Joined: 3/25/2007
From: California, USA
Status: offline 		What is a munch? That's a loaded question...

One resource for Portland is the Rose City Discussion Club.

_____________________________

If you lose one sense, your other senses are enhanced.
That's why people with no sense of humor have such an inflated sense of self-importance.


(in reply to travisaj1986)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/11/2010 7:23:16 PM   
AQuietSimpleMan


Posts: 1410
Joined: 11/15/2009
Status: offline 		OP, I have some advice for you since you are very new.

The Very next time you get a thought in your head and you want to ask "What does/is __________" or "What does________ Mean" you can help yourself and your education level by doing one or both of two things.

Open up a Browser window type www.google.com and then ask that question in the little box.

Or

At the top of this page there is a bunch of links on the right hand side one will say search.... where I put the blanks at type that word into the little search box.

Most of the answers to your questions are easy to find and you will get a LOT LESS Snark out of Wiki than you will with the people on sites like this.

My own included.

QSM

_____________________________

Guy Stud =Vs= Girl Slut ~~ Debate ENDED!

"If a Key opens many locks, then it is a Master Key, If a Lock is opened by lots of keys, then it is a Shitty Lock"

(in reply to TheHeretic)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/11/2010 7:30:19 PM   
Chrisincuffs


Posts: 602
Joined: 12/7/2009
Status: offline 		Wow QSM! what's with the snark today? Hey will you hit up google and find a DECENT munch in Minnesota for me since you're so full of wisdom and happiness?

_____________________________

No kind of sensation is keener and more active than pain it's impressions are unmistakable. -Marquis DeSade

(in reply to AQuietSimpleMan)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/11/2010 7:46:03 PM   
AQuietSimpleMan


Posts: 1410
Joined: 11/15/2009
Status: offline 		I think I'm getting my period.

If you scroll down on THIS PAGE you will get a list of organizations in the Minnesota area, one of them is bound to be able to help you.

QSM

_____________________________

Guy Stud =Vs= Girl Slut ~~ Debate ENDED!

"If a Key opens many locks, then it is a Master Key, If a Lock is opened by lots of keys, then it is a Shitty Lock"

(in reply to Chrisincuffs)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/11/2010 9:19:14 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5170
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline 		I've been to the Vancouver Munch several times and know people who go there regularly. We only get to go there when munch is happening at the same time we're passing through town.

It's held in a Mexican restaurant. As you go in the front door you'll see glass doors on your left with colored papers over the glass panes. The first person to greet you (as you'll look lost most likely) is Cowboy. He'll get you started on a temporary name tag and might introduce you to some others. It is a public restaurant but the meeting room is private and only for the munch participants.

Normal street clothes are the dress code, nothing fancy. Nice jeans and a shirt would be just fine. You may or may not order a meal from the waiters who pass through. You do pay for any food you order, but you do not have to order anything. There is water and soda that is on the main table for anyone to drink. It's the largest munch to which I have ever gone. There could easily be 80 people there. Mostly people sit around and chat. The chat could be about kink things because it is a private room. More than likely the chat will be about what people did the week before or did on vacation. There is no "one" conversation as there are many tables in the room. Sometimes one or more people will bring in and show toys and some of the toys are for sale.

It's really very casual. Smile a lot. Introduce yourself around. You'll do fine. The very first munch I ever attended was the Vancouver one and I had to travel nearly 300 miles to get there. They don't bite, in fact some of those people are among my dearest and closest friends.

The munch meets twice a month. Here is the URL for their web site.

Vancouver Munch

Also try the Rose City Discussion Group.

< Message edited by peppermint -- 8/11/2010 9:22:43 PM >

(in reply to travisaj1986)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/12/2010 8:19:40 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		If you don't mind, peppermint, I'd like to compliment and thank you publicly on your wonderful response above.  There is nothing like getting a response to a question from somebody who can add their participation or first hand experience from a place they have been to and is willing to share that.  Thank you for taking the time and being willing to go into so much detail for the OP.  I appreciated that a great deal.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/12/2010 9:23:01 AM   
travisaj1986


Posts: 10
Joined: 8/9/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AQuietSimpleMan

OP, I have some advice for you since you are very new.

The Very next time you get a thought in your head and you want to ask "What does/is __________" or "What does________ Mean" you can help yourself and your education level by doing one or both of two things.

Open up a Browser window type www.google.com and then ask that question in the little box.

Or

At the top of this page there is a bunch of links on the right hand side one will say search.... where I put the blanks at type that word into the little search box.

Most of the answers to your questions are easy to find and you will get a LOT LESS Snark out of Wiki than you will with the people on sites like this.

My own included.

QSM


A Quiet Simple Man,

The bigger question is why you felt the need to be so negative, as well as condescending in your response to my question. Plenty of other people on here some with more experience, and def. more tact managed to answer my question constructively while leaving out the sarcasm and negativity that permeated your response. Didn't your mother ever tell you the only dumb question is one you don't ask? And if you can't say anything nice, then shut your mouth.

You need to think a little more at what you are saying and how you say it before you document it online for the whole world to see.

Additionally, I will continue to ask questions to things I do not know the answer to, as well as garner any type of advice regarding the BDSM community and it's practices, as long as I am a member of this site. It is one of the primary benefits I sought to achieve when I created this account.

Hows that for "snark"?

Best Regards.

T.J.

(in reply to AQuietSimpleMan)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/12/2010 9:24:12 AM   
travisaj1986


Posts: 10
Joined: 8/9/2010
Status: offline 		You rock!

Thanks for the awesome info!

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/12/2010 9:29:38 AM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

If you don't mind, peppermint, I'd like to compliment and thank you publicly on your wonderful response above.  There is nothing like getting a response to a question from somebody who can add their participation or first hand experience from a place they have been to and is willing to share that.  Thank you for taking the time and being willing to go into so much detail for the OP.  I appreciated that a great deal.


I agree with LP.

And on a side note, welcome to CM, T.J. Enjoy yourself and may you have many happy years of WIITWD to come.

~ Red

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/12/2010 9:58:39 AM   
AQuietSimpleMan


Posts: 1410
Joined: 11/15/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: travisaj1986


A Quiet Simple Man,

The bigger question is why you felt the need to be so negative, as well as condescending in your response to my question. Plenty of other people on here some with more experience, and def. more tact managed to answer my question constructively while leaving out the sarcasm and negativity that permeated your response. Didn't your mother ever tell you the only dumb question is one you don't ask? And if you can't say anything nice, then shut your mouth.


I had a rough day yesterday, this is not an excuse if anything it is simply the reason I had less patience for lazy people than usual.

You are Lazy. My Mother taught me that when you have a question there are many different avenues to seek the answer in, unless in a education based understanding, like a classroom, seeking the answer for yourself with the tools that are freely give to you is expected of anyone who is not looking for someone to do the work for them.

When I asked my Mother what a word ment she would hand me a dictionary and tell me to look it up. When I asked my Mother what China was like she would hand me the "C" Encyclopedia. See she had the answer but so did these books.... it is the nature of Research. Asking a question where the answer is so easily found by using a search engine will open you to receiving specific information that does not always apply. In this thread you got Opinion, not really Fact or History. Not to mention with the exception of the one person who had been to a Vancover Munch you could not be sure that the information you received would for certain apply to your query.

Did you bother to try and find out how many times this question has been asked and answered on this board? How you ignored the work done by other people by expecting everyone to just do your research for you.

It is Lazy to do this. When you can no longer find the answers on your own, when you no longer have outlets to find the information you need, that is when you ask questions.

You quote that the only stupid question is the one that is left unasked, you do realize that is a quote about giving up right? When exhausting all other avenues and then not bothering to ask the question to someone who might know. That is stupid. You chose to fastforward to the end of that process.

quote:

ORIGINAL: travisaj1986

You need to think a little more at what you are saying and how you say it before you document it online for the whole world to see.


I am aware, I don't value my worth by what others think of me, nor do I think that the words typed on an online forum give enough dimension to what a person is saying and that more offten than not people assume what you are saying rather than finding out.

My comment was actually me trying to be nice to you, I know you don't see it that way, but the truth of the matter is if you are new in this lifestyle you are going to be hearing a LOT of words that you have never heard before and if you ask what it means everytime you will eventually have conflicting information from people you know nothing about, but doing your own research you can at very least find and learn at your own speed and as I said USUALLY without the Snark.

quote:

ORIGINAL: travisaj1986

Additionally, I will continue to ask questions to things I do not know the answer to, as well as garner any type of advice regarding the BDSM community and it's practices, as long as I am a member of this site. It is one of the primary benefits I sought to achieve when I created this account.


And eventually people will get tired of doing your research for you.

QSM

_____________________________

Guy Stud =Vs= Girl Slut ~~ Debate ENDED!

"If a Key opens many locks, then it is a Master Key, If a Lock is opened by lots of keys, then it is a Shitty Lock"

(in reply to travisaj1986)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/12/2010 10:20:30 AM   
travisaj1986


Posts: 10
Joined: 8/9/2010
Status: offline 		Well A-not-so-quiet-andverysimpleman,

As it worked out I did happen to get information from somebody who actually had gone to the munch I plan on attending. So it looks like my question while maybe irritating to you ended up being answered by a very helpful person on here. If you don't like what you read, don't read it. You obviously felt that my comment held enough sway, or truth that you had to attempt to justify or negate every aspect of it piece by piece as you did.


It's also entertaining how you started to apologize at the beg. using your "bad day" as an excuse for your behavior and initial comment towards me, only to then write about justifying it again!

Either way we are done, and I really do not want any further part of this dialog with you, or interaction with you in the future. Negative people have no place in my life.

Best of Luck

Travis.

(in reply to AQuietSimpleMan)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/12/2010 10:23:34 AM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline 		If you reread the OP he actually asked not merely for locations but for overall impressions of munches. It's a perfectly legitimate question for the forums imo.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to AQuietSimpleMan)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/12/2010 10:39:13 AM   
AQuietSimpleMan


Posts: 1410
Joined: 11/15/2009
Status: offline 		laurell,

I read the Op,

there was a very easy way for him to get the specific information he sought. I just suggested research options that would get specific information for exactlty what he was seeking.

If peppermint had not answered he would have vague possibly not direct infomation.

I just figure if you are given tools you should use them rather than asking someone else to do it for you.

Maybe I really am getting my Period, who knows.

QSM

_____________________________

Guy Stud =Vs= Girl Slut ~~ Debate ENDED!

"If a Key opens many locks, then it is a Master Key, If a Lock is opened by lots of keys, then it is a Shitty Lock"

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/12/2010 6:31:29 PM   
BambiBoi


Posts: 461
Joined: 8/10/2010
Status: offline 		A lunch is proof that even kinky people are normal folks with jobs and bills and even keys.

As a male, who is usually without a counterpart, I find munches to be very important to meeting new people. Instead of looking like a shark, wiggling through the crowd looking for something to mount, munches offer the opportunity to be judged based on my words, not the fact that I have a penis.

That said, single younger men are still kind of glared at. Just ignore it and don't be a prick - the dirty looks turn to smiles soon enough.

(in reply to AQuietSimpleMan)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What is a Munch?? - 8/12/2010 7:18:38 PM   
TheHeretic


Posts: 19100
Joined: 3/25/2007
From: California, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: travisaj1986


Hows that for "snark"?




Maybe google "pithy" for your next attempt?

_____________________________

If you lose one sense, your other senses are enhanced.
That's why people with no sense of humor have such an inflated sense of self-importance.


(in reply to travisaj1986)
Profile   Post #: 20
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