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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/15/2010 6:19:35 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

As far as writing to a sub woman and calling her Mistress, that is another irksome thing. It is usually accompanied by, but, but, but you LOOK like a Domme so I was hoping you would switch.
Grrrrrrrr.

Eh? Why do people think you look like a Mistress, sexyred? You look quite cheerful and friendly!

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/15/2010 6:24:30 PM

sexyred1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

As far as writing to a sub woman and calling her Mistress, that is another irksome thing. It is usually accompanied by, but, but, but you LOOK like a Domme so I was hoping you would switch.
Grrrrrrrr.

Eh? Why do people think you look like a Mistress, sexyred? You look quite cheerful and friendly!

Haha!! You are so cute....

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/15/2010 6:27:39 PM

dcnovice

Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
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quote:

What do you require before you even speak with a sub?

golf handicap
blood type
views on the Hawley-Smoot Tariff
ability to remember where he was when Jackie Onassis died
cmail that demonstrates use of serial commas
college transcript
shoe size
Sorting Hat results from at least two sites
favorite Pym novel
copy of a letter to an elected official on an issue of concern for him

That should do for getting started.

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it's never enough to keep up.

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INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/15/2010 6:38:01 PM

VaguelyCurious

Posts: 5264
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From: United Kingdom
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

ability to remember where he was when Jackie Onassis died

Ageist.

:P

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/15/2010 7:40:23 PM

LadyHibiscus

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Well she didn't die THAT long ago, VC!!

What if you have trouble choosing a favourite Pym novel?? Demanding little cuss, ain't ya!

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/15/2010 8:13:14 PM

numuncular

Posts: 183
Joined: 2/14/2009
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Make them convert to Islam and change their real name to a suitable arabic one before messaging you. Given enough time somebody probably will.

(btw has anyone else seen that profile on fetlife that requires anyone contacting her to have her name tatooed on themselves before she'll even speak to them?)

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/15/2010 11:50:26 PM

VaguelyCurious

Posts: 5264
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Well she didn't die THAT long ago, VC!!

She died in 1994. I don't remember much of 1994!

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/16/2010 7:43:26 AM

LadyHibiscus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Well she didn't die THAT long ago, VC!!

She died in 1994. I don't remember much of 1994!

LOL!! Well to be honest... shoot, neither do I! But then, last week is kind of a blur, too. :)

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/16/2010 12:32:53 PM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
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quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Well she didn't die THAT long ago, VC!!

She died in 1994. I don't remember much of 1994!

I was a student then, possibly a good thing that I don't remember much, I might blush A LOT....

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Those who do and those who don't!

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/16/2010 1:04:33 PM

CallaFirestormBW

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Really, I just look for messages that resonate with me. It really helps if the person is writing because xhe's read something that I posted to the boards, or xhe has a question about something in my profile. For now, at least, I dismiss anyone who is outside of the US, and preferentially respond to folks in my own back yard (the closer to where I am the better), unless I'm responding to a comment on something I've written.

One other thing about me is that I require a face-to-face meeting relatively quickly -- it's typically in a public place (local restaurant, coffee house, etc.), but I don't do online chat at all, and have a poor follow-up on electronic mail media, so I typically try to get the meeting aspects out of the way promptly, so that I (and the other person) can spend valuable energy in situations where it will be a productive venture for everyone involved.

Calla

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Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/16/2010 1:14:31 PM

Icarys

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MsApocalypse

I'm new here and quite overwhelmed with messages begging for My time. I'm wondering what everyone else requires before they talk to a would-be submissive. At this point, I have decided to require a photo (face and body) as well as a detailed list of their taste in books and music before I even consider giving them any of My time.

Some small insight into them through their words that say to me that they are sweet, humble and or a good person. All of that would be great but one's a good start for an interest.

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/18/2010 11:55:30 PM

GingerGirl4USA

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My name is Ginger
I really like this answer...thank you for your input. I am new here and am just beginning to read these ..what you have said has really stood out to me. I am always willing to learn something new..(smiles and hugs)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AlexandraLynch

Letter needs to mention something in the profile text, and be properly spelled and punctuated. I have a couple of geek in-jokes in the profile, such as "if you know how to recognize a king..." And a basic level of politeness towards me with signs of self-respect and self-worth referring to hirself.

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/19/2010 12:05:38 AM

GingerGirl4USA

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Joined: 8/18/2010
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Love this answer....Awsome ..I needed a good laugh...but its real in a way too...class and some smarts (smiles)

quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

quote:

What do you require before you even speak with a sub?

golf handicap
blood type
views on the Hawley-Smoot Tariff
ability to remember where he was when Jackie Onassis died
cmail that demonstrates use of serial commas
college transcript
shoe size
Sorting Hat results from at least two sites
favorite Pym novel
copy of a letter to an elected official on an issue of concern for him

That should do for getting started.

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/19/2010 2:03:37 PM

DameBruschetta

Posts: 116
Joined: 1/10/2010
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(Fast Reply)

Like a few other posters have mentioned - a lot of what I go by is instinct. For the most part, if they seem to have made an effort and we share some of the same interests I'll send a reply asking a few other things to get to know them better. (One of those things involves asking what some of their larger interests are, as well as what they aren't interested in.) If they've mentioned my profile or inegrated part of it, then thats certainly a plus. I don't have a lot of must haves in general though - I've run into a lot of neat and interesting people that way. A lot of them more compatible then I might have assumed otherwise - so generally if there are a few sticking points and common interests I'll take the next step and go further. At that point IMO I've found out that it either quickly goes up or downhill from there. We might converse and we don't have enough interests to facilitate a decent conversation, or there is some kind of personality flaw that pretty much ends all interests, or it all just goes well and things hit it off.

I don't have any specifics mentioned in my profile, I have never really found the need. Either they're making a half assed effort (which is evident in either the 1st or 2nd mail) or they're actually trying. Your milage may certainly vary, but I've found those who make it a point to try generally are not someone I regret making an effort to talk with and get to know.

I think if they're actually attaching photos and/or giving you a music/book list then you're already off to a damn good start.

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/22/2010 12:06:28 AM

MasterAWon

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Joined: 11/22/2009
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Why they are contacting me, what questions do they have for me.

I'll often reply back if there seems to be an interest in me. Questions, show me that they are interested in learning about me, not what I can do for them.
Biggest irk is using the word "dominate" inappropriately, second is not using spell check, dictionary. Third is having a profile that is not updated, as in saying they will relocate, but are unable to for 5 years.

Appreciate clothed pictures, sweetness, kind words.

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/22/2010 12:48:21 AM

dejablue1

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re: Op's first posting

Generally speaking from experience, most mistresses are seeking a very deep wallet and a very large checking account. Everything else appears secondary. It does not matter how much a person sacrifices, gains skills, pursues education, or betters themselves. None of that matters. At the end of the day the only thing that matters is how much the poor bastard is bringing in and willing to give.

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/22/2010 3:17:23 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dejablue1

re: Op's first posting

Generally speaking from experience, most mistresses are seeking a very deep wallet and a very large checking account. Everything else appears secondary. It does not matter how much a person sacrifices, gains skills, pursues education, or betters themselves. None of that matters. At the end of the day the only thing that matters is how much the poor bastard is bringing in and willing to give.

Fella, I just took a look at your profile.

It is absolutely blank. Not one single word about you, what you want in a Domme, what you offer her.

With that, you have eliminated every single one of the true lifestyle Dommes from considering you. You're 55 years old and have 55 years of experience, desires, discoveries to share. And you didn't. The Dommes will not care what the reasons are for you not saying anything about yourself - they'll simply ignore you.

The pro Dommes and scam artists of course will behave exactly like you said.

Tell you what. Fill out your profile, and come back and post more on the forums. Come with a genuine attitude of wanting to enjoy yourself and avoid complaining. Get to know some of the posters (which include some damn good women who happen to be Dommes). And see if things start changing for the better.

And be patient. It takes months, usually, to find a good match. But as long as you're enjoying it...

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"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/22/2010 4:46:24 AM

BentUnit

Posts: 897
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: dejablue1

re: Op's first posting

Generally speaking from experience, most mistresses are seeking a very deep wallet and a very large checking account. Everything else appears secondary. It does not matter how much a person sacrifices, gains skills, pursues education, or betters themselves. None of that matters. At the end of the day the only thing that matters is how much the poor bastard is bringing in and willing to give.

Fella, I just took a look at your profile.

It is absolutely blank. Not one single word about you, what you want in a Domme, what you offer her.

With that, you have eliminated every single one of the true lifestyle Dommes from considering you. You're 55 years old and have 55 years of experience, desires, discoveries to share. And you didn't. The Dommes will not care what the reasons are for you not saying anything about yourself - they'll simply ignore you.

The pro Dommes and scam artists of course will behave exactly like you said.

Tell you what. Fill out your profile, and come back and post more on the forums. Come with a genuine attitude of wanting to enjoy yourself and avoid complaining. Get to know some of the posters (which include some damn good women who happen to be Dommes). And see if things start changing for the better.

And be patient. It takes months, usually, to find a good match. But as long as you're enjoying it...

..sometimes little miracles fall out of the sky and land in your lap.

(and no I'm not talking about pigeon poop)

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/22/2010 5:44:38 AM

dejablue1

Posts: 2
Joined: 8/21/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: dejablue1

re: Op's first posting

Generally speaking from experience, most mistresses are seeking a very deep wallet and a very large checking account. Everything else appears secondary. It does not matter how much a person sacrifices, gains skills, pursues education, or betters themselves. None of that matters. At the end of the day the only thing that matters is how much the poor bastard is bringing in and willing to give.

Fella, I just took a look at your profile.

It is absolutely blank. Not one single word about you, what you want in a Domme, what you offer her.

With that, you have eliminated every single one of the true lifestyle Dommes from considering you. You're 55 years old and have 55 years of experience, desires, discoveries to share. And you didn't. The Dommes will not care what the reasons are for you not saying anything about yourself - they'll simply ignore you.

The pro Dommes and scam artists of course will behave exactly like you said.

Tell you what. Fill out your profile, and come back and post more on the forums. Come with a genuine attitude of wanting to enjoy yourself and avoid complaining. Get to know some of the posters (which include some damn good women who happen to be Dommes). And see if things start changing for the better.

And be patient. It takes months, usually, to find a good match. But as long as you're enjoying it...

Of course it is and deliberately so. I had a previous profile on here for 8 years and so I am well aware of what does and does not belong in a profile. With that being said, this profile is merely a means to a personal end as this website is bullshit and the people on it are full of bullshit as well. Why have a fully completed profile that will serve no purpose beyond drawing out the scam artists and money whores? Months to find a good match, huh? No, even that statement is bullshit and you know it. Years can go by and in some cases even a decade or more to find a good match. So hence, what is the point in bothering to even try unless you are prepared to sacrifice a large portion of your life in doing so?

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RE: What do you require before you even speak with a sub? - 8/22/2010 6:43:55 AM

BonesFromAsh

Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dejablue1

Of course it is and deliberately so. I had a previous profile on here for 8 years and so I am well aware of what does and does not belong in a profile. With that being said, this profile is merely a means to a personal end as this website is bullshit and the people on it are full of bullshit as well. Why have a fully completed profile that will serve no purpose beyond drawing out the scam artists and money whores? Months to find a good match, huh? No, even that statement is bullshit and you know it. Years can go by and in some cases even a decade or more to find a good match. So hence, what is the point in bothering to even try unless you are prepared to sacrifice a large portion of your life in doing so?

"Patience is bitter but it bears a sweet fruit" ~Turkish proverb~

I guess it all depends on how much you want the fruit.

Back on topic....Before I respond to anyone, I look at their profile to get a view of how they wish to be percieved by others. I like a man (dom or sub) to show he's intelligent, funny, creative and has a strong reality-based footing. I'm more likely to respond to a witty and engaging short email that asks a question or is a comment on a post I made or something in my profile (which is quite sparse at this time) then a "I beg you Mistress...." or "hi, how are you?" bit of nonsense.

As it stands, emails from those overseas or over the border go directly to my bulk folder, which I do check on occassion. Generally, I'm not looking to chat back and forth for days (months?) on end so those who are available for a face-to-face coffee date are going to get my attention quicker than someone states away.

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