Termyn8or
Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
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"...And you are not responsible for children you give birth to. You can hand them over to the state.
Same for the elderly. "
You are going to have to elaborate a bit if you want me to agree. You mean that unequivocably ? If so, your family is tougher than mine.
And the first part about the children, you are going to have a tough time convicing me. A bitch must lay down to feed her pups, this is the nature of life as we know it, and that axiom must extend to humans of course, as our offspring are born in a very vulnerable condition.
This is what has happened to the American family. Now we just drop off the kids and Grampa and fukum ? In my core family any of us can have anything another has. Operating as a team it makes us stronger. When my Grandma lived with us, we kids had exposure to her, and her life experience. When we used to go to Grampa's I learned more from him than my own Father. One thing I learned there was tolerance, as racist as they may have been, the olman (his son) was a real prick, and considered slow. Grampa told me, in my early teens that I should try to be tolerant. Where the fuck else would you learn things like that ?
Maybe you don't understand that, and I consider that a loss. The family is what got our ancestors through the hard times. The family used to be the primary source of education for the young. The family used to be the rock, while the world was the hard place. When I did well I wanted to brag - to my familty. Parents, Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles. My first electronics bok "disappeared" from the USAF and was a big part of what led me to success.
I don't feel sorry for anyone, as I have not the capacity. When others tell me of a problem I use my time to try to find a solution. There is no time for tears or bullshit. But if you are that far removed from the concept of family, you are in contention for pity. From someone anyway.
But do you even want it ? If that's your attitude then obviously you are a stand up person who makes their own way in life. There is nothing wrong with that. But my perspective may differ. My Mother who put up with me for about twenty years before giving me the boot is again helping me out due to my illness. As far as I am concerned she can have BOTH of my kidneys if she needs them. But she would not take them, at least not both of them.
I see a great loss here. I love talking with old people. Down the street is a guy old as the hills. He lived through "the great depression". He is still home and as far as I know doing OK. When he croaks it will be a loss. I ran into him one day because I was dumping some grass clippings down his hill. He was tossing his old rabbit cages. Many years ago his family raised rabbits to have some meat. There was no money and even if there was you couldn't really buy much, it was not available.
They found a way to survive, and soon we will have to do the same, because it is coming to us. When any of these oldsters are still cognizant and willing to talk with us youngins, that is valuable time.
This type of thing gave life continuity. You understand death and birth in a way that cannot be taught in any school. You value life for what it is and moreso, whatever freedom you have. You also know when it is time to go, and that is a personal decision. It seems like a totally different outlook on life, and today I guess it is. But a long time ago it was the norm.
Many people who see what we have lost, the family, are unfortunately racist usually and blame this loss on the wrong people. And that's a damn shame because so many throw the baby out with the bathwater so to speak.
What are your responsibilities, to work ? Your boss doesn't give a fuck about you, only the money you can make him. What else, drive responsibly ? Well they can take your shit if you harm someone. Does that mean that in today's society morals are now based on consequences only ? That's not the world in which I grew up.
Others are different. Let it be. But I wouldn't mind knowing a bit more about it, and that is partially selfish rather than just curiousity, it may help me deal with the world sometimes.
I come from a different world than many I guess. If I left a member of my family or chosen family at a motel, and got into a fatal car crash on the way, my last words would be to tell whoever that someone is sitting there stranded. I've known people who have done decades in prison for other family members because they wanted to take the rap. Like an old Uncle who didn't want the kid's life fucked up. In my chosen family there are people who would go to jail for me, but I wouldn't allow it because I also care about them.
I don't care who it was that made conditions right to destroy people's sense of family, maybe it was the republicans, the Jews or who the fuck knows. But if we were strong enough they would never have been able to do it. All kinds of enemies exist, we knew it and we know it. It is we who have failed.
I'm sorry if you don't see it that way but there is not much I can do. You are missing something in life, something very important. And it probably works out that I don't pity, because you would probably reject it anyway. Actually that is admirble, so don't get the idea that I am trying to put you down.
T
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RE: Adult Children Abandoning Parents at Hotels - 
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that trip was meant to be their mothers "treat" btw....
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