LadyPact
Posts: 32566
Status: offline
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OP, first let Me tell you that I feel for your situation. You may have to make some decisions on what you feel has the greater priority in your life. It's not that I want to tell you to give up hope, but five and a half years is quite a long time. I would urge you to discuss the situation (I know that's an 'again' statement) and maybe think about Steven's suggestion if all of your wants can't be fulfilled with one partner. It may be a solution for you or there may be another compromise out there that will work. The reason that I wanted to contribute to this thread is not to be argumentative, but if I would take some of the above statements as fact, I wouldn't be here. While I hate the term, I am what some people would call a "later in life" Dominant. Unlike many, My first urges about Dominance were not when I was first exploring sexuality. I didn't have My first M/s dynamic until My late twenties. It wasn't until My thirties that I got My first taste for sadism. (Granted, I don't think I would have become either of those things if I felt 'forced' in some way or I was only doing it to please someone else. I'm kind of stubborn.) Point being, if the only way that someone could come to this lifestyle is orientation from birth, or the way they have always been, I shouldn't be sitting here, typing this reply from a state of residual top space because I spent My evening last night beating the hell out of My slave. No, not every person that we wish will become kinky to please a partner. If that were the case, threads like this one would not exist. I can't tell you what the difference is between one person and another that some folks will acquire an interest in wiitwd and others won't. I don't know what it is that sparks in someone to become interested in all of this at a different stage in life. I just know that it can happen because I'm typing it out right now. OP, that's not a guarantee that it's going to happen in your case. In honesty, if you've been waiting for that spark to happen for five years and it hasn't, I don't know how hopeful I would be. You are the only person who can decide if it's time to give up or if that is something you even want to consider. Maybe a different approach is what is needed or an alternative suggestion, such as Steven's. However you handle this, I do want to wish you the best of luck.
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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie. Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread
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