michaelGA2 -> RE: Tributes... (4/30/2006 12:23:04 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Najakcharmer Nobody has time for a cheapskate who wants to take from you but is not willing to give anything back. Dommes who aren't pros generally want a healthy two way relationship where the sub offers them friendship, respect, love, loyalty, devotion, committment, romance, security, emotional availability, time and/or energy. A sub who is not willing to give those things to a domme but wants to get his fetish itch scratched anyway had really better be prepared to pay for his play. And there are a really shocking number of guysubs out there who have exactly this attitude. They want to "get done", their way, without giving anything back in return except "their submission:", which actually translates not to submission but to "force me to have a kinky orgasm the exact way I tell you to." That just doesn't work in the real world of relationships. A fair transaction means that both parties have to give something and both parties should expect to get something. There are a hell of a lot of needy male subs out there who are absolutely not willing to give a a dominant partner what she wants in a real life relationship. They don't want to give anything at all. They only want to be "forced" to do the specific things that turn them on. They want to get "done" their way, and they could care less what their partner wants. And if they can't find a domme who will drop everything in her life and cater to their personal whims, they become bitter and angry and decide that all dommes are fakes or gold diggers who just want money. Certainly there are a lot of fakes and gold diggers, but there are also a lot of real people with the perfectly ordinary expectation that they want a partner who actually cares about them. If you haven't been able to attract one of the real people looking for a partner, there might just be a reason. there's a HUGE difference between giving oneself to a Dominant and giving one's wallet to them. now, after a long-term, established relationship, perhaps the wallet is up for grabs. as for the sexual issue, i will put this puppy to rest (as a personal preference) i am NOT looking for a sexual relationship from any Dominant, so rest assured this is neither what i seek or offer. for me, D/s is NOT about sex.
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